goemaw.com
General Discussion => Essentially Flyertalk => Topic started by: Cartierfor3 on June 01, 2014, 10:17:56 PM
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You tell me a joke, I tell you if it is funny using a unique scale I've been crafting.
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Format?
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Format?
Zero Tacos.
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Ku football OMG AM I RITE GUYS!?!?!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Three tomatoes are walking down the street papa tomato, mama tomato, and a little baby tomato. Baby tomato starts lagging behind. Papa tomato gets angry, goes over to the baby tomato, and smooshes him... and says, "Catch up"
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Format?
Zero Tacos.
lol
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you couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot babe.......lost my train of thought
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This thread.
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Ku football OMG AM I RITE GUYS!?!?!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Three tomatoes are walking down the street papa tomato, mama tomato, and a little baby tomato. Baby tomato starts lagging behind. Papa tomato gets angry, goes over to the baby tomato, and smooshes him... and says, "Catch up"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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This thread.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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you couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot babe.......lost my train of thought
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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It's hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac because they always take things literally.
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you couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot babe.......lost my train of thought
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
you jerk
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It's hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac because they always take things literally.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Have you heard about the new pirate movie?.......... It’s rated AARRRRGGH
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so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
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Knock knock
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does anyone else smell updog?
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Have you heard about the new pirate movie?.......... It’s rated AARRRRGGH
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Knock knock
Zero tacos
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does anyone else smell updog?
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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So I got 5 total tacos first, I win, right?
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so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
so Phil Connors walks into a bar
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Oh I just got it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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So I got 5 total tacos first, I win, right?
No way. The 5 taco bonanza has to be won on a single joke. It will be like the pleasure dome in here when someone gets a 5 taco rating.
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Here's a family friendly joke.
Sherlock and Watson went camping in the desert. After they built their campsite and set up their tent, night came and the two went to sleep. In the middle of the night, Sherlock shoved and awoke Watson, who was snoring. As the two were laying there, Sherlock said "Watson, look up and tell me what you see." Watson responded "I see a countless number of stars." Sherlock said "And, my dear friend Watson, what do you deduce from this?" Watson thought for a moment before answering "Well, if we can see this multitude of stars from earth, and the universe is far greater than what we even see, then it is likely that some star somewhere contains life. Is that the answer you were looking for, Sherlock?"
Sherlock sat up and looked at Watson and muttered, "No, you idiot. It means someone stole our tent."
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Do you like fishsticks?
Yeah.
Do you like putting fish sticks in your mouth?
Yeah.
What are you, a gay fish?
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Here's a family friendly joke.
Sherlock and Watson went camping in the desert. After they built their campsite and set up their tent, night came and the two went to sleep. In the middle of the night, Sherlock shoved and awoke Watson, who was snoring. As the two were laying there, Sherlock said "Watson, look up and tell me what you see." Watson responded "I see a countless number of stars." Sherlock said "And, my dear friend Watson, what do you deduce from this?" Watson thought for a moment before answering "Well, if we can see this multitude of stars from earth, and the universe is far greater than what we even see, then it is likely that some star somewhere contains life. Is that the answer you were looking for, Sherlock?"
Sherlock sat up and looked at Watson and muttered, "No, you idiot. It means someone stole our tent."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Do you like fishsticks?
Yeah.
Do you like putting fish sticks in your mouth?
Yeah.
What are you, a gay fish?
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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:don'tcare:
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:don'tcare:
zero tacos
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Why are there no "knock knock" jokes about America?
Because freedom always rings.
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A nun, a black guy, and a muslim walk into a bar.
The bartender sits back and smiles, appreciating how lucky he is to live in such a diverse city.
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the last 2 :thumbs:
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Cashing in on the gastro-gourmet trends of high end restaurants in the area, some chemistry grad students decide to open up their own restaurant. On their first day, two business men sit down for lunch. Laughing about the novelty of the place, the first orders an H2O when asked what he'd like to drink. The second man says he'd like an H20 too. The restaurant was shut down before dinner.
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What's the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?
Eric Clapton would never let a bag of a coke fall off an apartment building.
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A man is hiking alone in the mountains when he sees a little girl crying near the edge of a steep cliff. He says to the little girl "what's wrong, why are you so upset?"
She responds, "my older brother tripped and fell off this cliff, and my parents fell off trying to catch him. Now I'm all alone in these woods and I'm scared"
The man unzips his pants and says, "today just isn't your day sweetie."
The girl screams, "KATDADDY, NOOOOOOOOO!"
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How to catch a polar bear:
Step#1. Cut a hole in the ice
Step#2. Spread peas around the hole
When the bear comes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole. :D
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interupting cow.
Interupting cow w-
MOOO!
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what do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
virgin mobile
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What did Geronimo say when he jumped off the cliff?
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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@EllRobersonIsInnocent's face.
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Why are there no "knock knock" jokes about America?
Because freedom always rings.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A nun, a black guy, and a muslim walk into a bar.
The bartender sits back and smiles, appreciating how lucky he is to live in such a diverse city.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Cashing in on the gastro-gourmet trends of high end restaurants in the area, some chemistry grad students decide to open up their own restaurant. On their first day, two business men sit down for lunch. Laughing about the novelty of the place, the first orders an H2O when asked what he'd like to drink. The second man says he'd like an H20 too. The restaurant was shut down before dinner.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What's the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?
Eric Clapton would never let a bag of a coke fall off an apartment building.
zero tacos. this is a family blog.
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A man is hiking alone in the mountains when he sees a little girl crying near the edge of a steep cliff. He says to the little girl "what's wrong, why are you so upset?"
She responds, "my older brother tripped and fell off this cliff, and my parents fell off trying to catch him. Now I'm all alone in these woods and I'm scared"
The man unzips his pants and says, "today just isn't your day sweetie."
The girl screams, "KATDADDY, NOOOOOOOOO!"
zero tacos
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How to catch a polar bear:
Step#1. Cut a hole in the ice
Step#2. Spread peas around the hole
When the bear comes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole. :D
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interupting cow.
Interupting cow w-
MOOO!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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what do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
virgin mobile
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What did Geronimo say when he jumped off the cliff?
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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@EllRobersonIsInnocent's face.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Cashing in on the gastro-gourmet trends of high end restaurants in the area, some chemistry grad students decide to open up their own restaurant. On their first day, two business men sit down for lunch. Laughing about the novelty of the place, the first orders an H2O when asked what he'd like to drink. The second man says he'd like an H20 too. The restaurant was shut down before dinner.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
This is actually a great joke he just screwed up the delivery.
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what do you call a fat psychic?
a four chin teller!
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what do you call a fat psychic?
a four chin teller!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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An old man takes his sick wife to the doctor. After the examination the doctor pulls the man aside... "Sir... your wife either has AIDS or Alzheimer's but we can't figure out which." Horrified the man asks... "Doc, what are we going do do?" The doctor looks at the wife, looks back at the man and says... "Take her home and make her get out of the car half way there. If she shows up at the door, don't eff her."
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An old man takes his sick wife to the doctor. After the examination the doctor pulls the man aside... "Sir... your wife either has AIDS or Alzheimer's but we can't figure out which." Horrified the man asks... "Doc, what are we going do do?" The doctor looks at the wife, looks back at the man and says... "Take her home and make her get out of the car half way there. If she shows up at the door, don't eff her."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you." The grasshopper says, "You have a drink named Fred?"
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what do you call a window that raps?
2PANEZ!!!!!!
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What does a nosey pepper do? Gets Jalapeño business.
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Why doesn't a chicken coop have 4 doors??
Because then it would be a chicken sedan.
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did you hear about the paddle sale at the boat store?
it was quite the oar deal!
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what do you call seagulls in san fransisco?
bagels.
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What does a nosey pepper do? Gets Jalapeño business.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b) + 1 bonus (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b) because its in the mexican food genre.
what do you call a window that raps?
2PANEZ!!!!!!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you." The grasshopper says, "You have a drink named Fred?"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Why doesn't a chicken coop have 4 doors??
Because then it would be a chicken sedan.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
did you hear about the paddle sale at the boat store?
it was quite the oar deal!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
what do you call seagulls in san fransisco?
bagels.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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An Eskimo dropped off his snowmobile at the mechanic and went across the street to get a fish sandwich at McDonalds. Upon his return the mechanic says... "Well, it looks like you've blown a seal." The Eskimo wipes his mouth and says... "No, that's probably tartar sauce."
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An Eskimo dropped off his snowmobile at the mechanic and went across the street to get a fish sandwich at McDonalds. Upon his return the mechanic says... "Well, it looks like you've blown a seal." The Eskimo wipes his mouth and says... "No, that's probably tartar sauce."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What has two thumbs and likes ice cream?
This guy!
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An Eskimo dropped off his snowmobile at the mechanic and went across the street to get a chicken burrito at Chipotle. Upon his return the mechanic says... "Well, it looks like you've blown a seal." The Eskimo wipes his mouth and says... "No, that's probably sour cream."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
EDITED!!!! Please review.
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What has two thumbs and likes ice cream?
This guy!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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An Eskimo dropped off his snowmobile at the mechanic and went across the street to get a chicken burrito at Chipotle. Upon his return the mechanic says... "Well, it looks like you've blown a seal." The Eskimo wipes his mouth and says... "No, that's probably sour cream."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
EDITED!!!! Please review.
1 bonus (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What did the Mexican say when his house fell over on him?
Get off me homes!
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A MacBook Pro, a Galaxy Note, an iPad all walk into a karaoke bar. They all dance to "U Can't Touch This" while Jim from IT raps, but only the MacBook Pro knows how he really feels.
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Some sort of a pun involving fruit talking to each other
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I once a slice of apple pie with a slice of cheddar cheese on it, and for dessert I had hamburger à la Mode.
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I was really thirsty one day and when I got a cold glass of ice water I was like, this is some solid H2OHYESTHISISGOOD.
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"if you talk about batting averages you must be from 1908"
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Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?
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Why is CF3 so caustic? Because the trifluomethyl group has a significant electronegativity that is often described as being intermediate between the electronegativities of fluorine and chlorine. For this reason, trifluoromethyl-substituted compounds are often strong acids, such as trifluoromethanesulfonic acid and trifluoroacetic acid.
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a man walks up to the counter at the library and says "hello. ill have a cheeseburger and fries, please!"
the lady at the counter says "sir you know youre in a library, right?"
the man whispers back "oh, sorry, ill have a cheeseburger and fries, please."
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Two gay guys walked into a bar in western kansas.
Everything went great because the owners were very nice and accepting.
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Two gay guys walked into a bar in western kansas.
Everything went great because the owners were very nice and accepting.
This one kills at parties btw. I hope it get a solid taco score.
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On orange cat was sitting on a fence watching a squirrel run across the lawn. The cat yells, "Hey man, why in such a big hurry?" The squirrel turns back and shouts, "Because I don't want you to eat me bro!", to which the cat replies "Oh that makes sense, too bad it's Lent though and I have given up eating squirrels, so you can just relax." The squirrel doesn't stop running though because it knew that cat was at best a Christmas/Easter cat. Unfortunately, a Methodist owl was in the tree and ate Mr. Squirrel :frown:.
But its ok because Mr. Squirrel was a serial killer :ROFL:.
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lol
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"if you talk about batting averages you must be from 1908"
:D
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a priest is walking down the sidewalk and he stumbles into a homeless drunk guy. the homeless guy looks up and says "I am Jesus."
the priest doesnt believe him and says "if you're Jesus, prove it."
the homeless man says "ok, follow me" and they walk into a bar.
the two men walk in and the bartender says "Jesus Christ, what are you doing in here again?!"
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Why do aliens have such big heads? Because they love hats.
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What's the deal with toothpaste? I mean come on! With the tubes and having to squeeze it from the end. It's like "Hello? It's 2014 here can't put this into a better delivery system?" They can make quantum enabled beer cans but with toothpaste we have to hunch over and squeeeeze from the end like a 3 year old kid in daycare on crack! And don't get me started on what it looks like. "OOH DUR LET'S MAKE IT WHITE AGAIN!" "GREAT IDEA JONES!" And the commercials for this stuff? GIVE ME A BREAK! You have these demented grinning psychos running around cramming this paste into their faces while I gotta sit here and believe that this is greatest miracle known to man. It doesn't even do what it says? I'd love to see you try to get a tooth knocked out and put back in place with this so-called tooth paste! Advertisers man, they will stop at nothing to get your soul. What we need is a paste to get rid of them [pause for applause], maybe call it butt paste because that's where the heads of these bozos on 5th Avenue are at!
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Vodka, Gin, and Whiskey all walk into a Whole Foods. The manager runs up to the and demands to know why they aren't wearing pants. Vodka runs away, Gin starts crying and Whiskey shoots him in the head.
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what do you do when you see a Spaceman?
park your car, man.
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Is four tacos good? Did I break it?
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Cashing in on the gastro-gourmet trends of high end restaurants in the area, some chemistry grad students decide to open up their own restaurant. On their first day, two business men sit down for lunch. Laughing about the novelty of the place, the first orders an H2O when asked what he'd like to drink. The second man says he'd like an H20 too. The restaurant was shut down before dinner.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
This is actually a great joke he just screwed up the delivery.
I was trying to change it from meme caption form to spoken joke form, i thought it was funny. :dunno:
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horse walks into a bar and the bartender says hey why the long face?
also, chingon's are very funny.
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:blank:
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What's so great about having sex with a pregnant chick?
Handjob same time
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:sdeek:
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Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?"
The old woman replies shyly, "Depends... ."
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A group of 3rd graders was given a "taste test" at school one day. Blindfolded, the first little girl gets an apple slice and say's "Mrs. Smith, that tastes like apple". The teacher says, "Very good, Mary. You may take your seat."
The second boy gets an orange wedge and says, "Mrs. Smith, that was orange". She says, "Very good, Robert. You may take your seat."
Next up is Johnny with Billy to follow. She unwraps a Hershey's kiss and gives it to Johnny. He eats and and says, "I'm not sure what that was, Mrs. Smith." The teacher, thinking that Johnny is just trying to get another piece of chocolate decides to give him a "hint" rather than more of the delicious candy... Mrs. Smith says, "I'll give you a hint, Johnny. It's something that your mommy gives your daddy every night when they go to bed."
Billy spins around and says, "Spit it out, Johnny!!! It's a piece of ass!!!"
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lol
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So little Johnny is in class taking in a vocabulary lesson. One of the words is dictate, and the teacher asks Johnny to use it in a sentence. He says:
"My momma's always complainin' because she don't like the way my daddy's dictate."
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So little Johnny is in class taking in a vocabulary lesson. One of the words is dictate, and the teacher asks Johnny to use it in a sentence. He says:
"My momma's always complainin' because she don't like the way my daddy's dictate."
:Yuck:
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Wow, those are just terrible jokes. Just truly bad.
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I had a good one about gay guys in western kansas earlier, if you want to study good joke structure.
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The FBI had an opening for an assassin.
After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists: two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you find your wife sitting in a chair...kill her!"
The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."
The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet.
The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. "This gun is loaded with blanks" she said.
"I had to kill him with the chair!"
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How do you make a tissue dance?
put a little boogie in it
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A man is hiking alone in the mountains when he sees a little girl crying near the edge of a steep cliff. He says to the little girl "what's wrong, why are you so upset?"
She responds, "my older brother tripped and fell off this cliff, and my parents fell off trying to catch him. Now I'm all alone in these woods and I'm scared"
The man unzips his pants and says, "today just isn't your day sweetie."
The girl screams, "KATDADDY, NOOOOOOOOO!"
:curse: :curse: :curse: :curse: :curse:
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Why is CF3 so caustic? Because the trifluomethyl group has a significant electronegativity that is often described as being intermediate between the electronegativities of fluorine and chlorine. For this reason, trifluoromethyl-substituted compounds are often strong acids, such as trifluoromethanesulfonic acid and trifluoroacetic acid.
Is the professor still at KU?
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I don't have any, for say, jokes. But I got a true story to tell. When I was a young man, I had the most wonderful hunting dog known to man. One day my neighbor asked to barrow my dog for a hunting trip in western Kansas. After a couple of weeks, I went over to the neighbor's place to get my dog. He looked sadly at me and said he had to shoot my dog. I asked him why he would do that. He proceeds to tell me about his hunting trip. "We go hunting for geese and Tex, my dog's name, looked straight up in the sky in the middle of a field and then scrapes the ground with his paw three times. Sure enough, three geese flew right over us. Later on, we're in a boat on the Smokey River and it's really windy. We are getting close to a bend in the river and Tex curves his front paw around in the shape of the bend. Then picks up a wood hammer we happen to have in the boat and shakes his head a half dozen times. Well what do you think was around the bend, if you're guessing 6 mallard ducks, you're correct." At that point I asked what in the world would make you want to kill my wonderful hunter partner. "We decided to go hunting for ducks on farm ponds. We're walking up to the berm of this huge pond and just before we get there, your dog finds a mud hole and starts to roll in it and then picks up a stick and shakes it violently. It looks like the dog had gone mad, so I shot him."
My eyes got the size of red hot boulders, when I told that stupid son of duck mucker that Tex was telling them there were more mud ducks on that pond than you could shake a stick at. :curse:
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I don't have any, for say, jokes. But I got a true story to tell. When I was a young man, I had the most wonderful hunting dog known to man. One day my neighbor asked to barrow my dog for a hunting trip in western Kansas. After a couple of weeks, I went over to the neighbor's place to get my dog. He looked sadly at me and said he had to shoot my dog. I asked him why he would do that. He proceeds to tell me about his hunting trip. "We go hunting for geese and Tex, my dog's name, looked straight up in the sky in the middle of a field and then scrapes the ground with his paw three times. Sure enough, three geese flew right over us. Later on, we're in a boat on the Smokey River and it's really windy. We are getting close to a bend in the river and Tex curves his front paw around in the shape of the bend. Then picks up a wood hammer we happen to have in the boat and shakes his head a half dozen times. Well what do you think was around the bend, if you're guessing 6 mallard ducks, you're correct." At that point I asked what in the world would make you want to kill my wonderful hunter partner. "We decided to go hunting for ducks on farm ponds. We're walking up to the berm of this huge pond and just before we get there, your dog finds a mud hole and starts to roll in it and then picks up a stick and shakes it violently. It looks like the dog had gone mad, so I shot him."
My eyes got the size of red hot boulders, when I told that stupid son of duck mucker that Tex was telling them there were more mud ducks on that pond than you could shake a stick at. :curse:
Tacos???
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Q: What did the fish say when he hit is head???
A:....."Dam"
:ROFL: holy crap it gets me every time
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My penis. Girls usually laugh at it so it has to be taco worthy?
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A group of 3rd graders was given a "taste test" at school one day. Blindfolded, the first little girl gets an apple slice and say's "Mrs. Smith, that tastes like apple". The teacher says, "Very good, Mary. You may take your seat."
The second boy gets an orange wedge and says, "Mrs. Smith, that was orange". She says, "Very good, Robert. You may take your seat."
Next up is Johnny with Billy to follow. She unwraps a Hershey's kiss and gives it to Johnny. He eats and and says, "I'm not sure what that was, Mrs. Smith." The teacher, thinking that Johnny is just trying to get another piece of chocolate decides to give him a "hint" rather than more of the delicious candy... Mrs. Smith says, "I'll give you a hint, Johnny. It's something that your mommy gives your daddy every night when they go to bed."
Billy spins around and says, "Spit it out, Johnny!!! It's a piece of ass!!!"
Did you stop scoring? Where are my 5 rough ridin' tacos?!?
:impatient:
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What did the bug say just before he hit the car windshield at 70 MPH. "That takes guts!"
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My penis. Girls usually laugh at it so it has to be taco worthy?
have you stopped by the dick pic thread?
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So a termite walks into So Long and asks "is the bar tender here?"
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What did the bug say just before he hit the car windshield at 70 MPH. "That takes guts!"
To add to that. What's the last thing that goes through a bug's brain when it hits a windshield?
It's ass.
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CF3's promptness in judging jokes in this thread :lol: :lol: :lol:
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What do you get when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito?
Nothing, you cant cross a scalar with a vector.
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Potato
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Punch line only:
Rectum? It damn near killed him!
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CF3's promptness in judging jokes in this thread :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I am sorry. Has been a hectic hectic week with many things going on. This evening I plan to promptly taco all jokes I have yet to taco. You are my buds and I'm sorry I've left you hanging by a taco.
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What's the difference in and egg, your wife, your meat, and a blowjob?
You can beat and egg.
You can beat your wife.
You can even beat your meat!,
But.......
You just can't beat a good blowjob.
Gonna win 'em all!
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What did the Mexican say when his house fell over on him?
Get off me homes!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A MacBook Pro, a Galaxy Note, an iPad all walk into a karaoke bar. They all dance to "U Can't Touch This" while Jim from IT raps, but only the MacBook Pro knows how he really feels.
I don't get it, but I'm not that smart and I assume its a smart joke.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Some sort of a pun involving fruit talking to each other
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I once a slice of apple pie with a slice of cheddar cheese on it, and for dessert I had hamburger à la Mode.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I was really thirsty one day and when I got a cold glass of ice water I was like, this is some solid H2OHYESTHISISGOOD.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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"if you talk about batting averages you must be from 1908"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
This is our first 5 taco'd joke. Congrats to 1908cat! :ksu:
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Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Why is CF3 so caustic? Because the trifluomethyl group has a significant electronegativity that is often described as being intermediate between the electronegativities of fluorine and chlorine. For this reason, trifluoromethyl-substituted compounds are often strong acids, such as trifluoromethanesulfonic acid and trifluoroacetic acid.
I don't get it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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a man walks up to the counter at the library and says "hello. ill have a cheeseburger and fries, please!"
the lady at the counter says "sir you know youre in a library, right?"
the man whispers back "oh, sorry, ill have a cheeseburger and fries, please."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Two gay guys walked into a bar in western kansas.
Everything went great because the owners were very nice and accepting.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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On orange cat was sitting on a fence watching a squirrel run across the lawn. The cat yells, "Hey man, why in such a big hurry?" The squirrel turns back and shouts, "Because I don't want you to eat me bro!", to which the cat replies "Oh that makes sense, too bad it's Lent though and I have given up eating squirrels, so you can just relax." The squirrel doesn't stop running though because it knew that cat was at best a Christmas/Easter cat. Unfortunately, a Methodist owl was in the tree and ate Mr. Squirrel :frown:.
But its ok because Mr. Squirrel was a serial killer :ROFL:.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
That's our 2nd 5 taco joke! :ksu:
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a priest is walking down the sidewalk and he stumbles into a homeless drunk guy. the homeless guy looks up and says "I am Jesus."
the priest doesnt believe him and says "if you're Jesus, prove it."
the homeless man says "ok, follow me" and they walk into a bar.
the two men walk in and the bartender says "Jesus Christ, what are you doing in here again?!"
needed more water to wine or something.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Why do aliens have such big heads? Because they love hats.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What's the deal with toothpaste? I mean come on! With the tubes and having to squeeze it from the end. It's like "Hello? It's 2014 here can't put this into a better delivery system?" They can make quantum enabled beer cans but with toothpaste we have to hunch over and squeeeeze from the end like a 3 year old kid in daycare on crack! And don't get me started on what it looks like. "OOH DUR LET'S MAKE IT WHITE AGAIN!" "GREAT IDEA JONES!" And the commercials for this stuff? GIVE ME A BREAK! You have these demented grinning psychos running around cramming this paste into their faces while I gotta sit here and believe that this is greatest miracle known to man. It doesn't even do what it says? I'd love to see you try to get a tooth knocked out and put back in place with this so-called tooth paste! Advertisers man, they will stop at nothing to get your soul. What we need is a paste to get rid of them [pause for applause], maybe call it butt paste because that's where the heads of these bozos on 5th Avenue are at!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
THATS CINCO!
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Vodka, Gin, and Whiskey all walk into a Whole Foods. The manager runs up to the and demands to know why they aren't wearing pants. Vodka runs away, Gin starts crying and Whiskey shoots him in the head.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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what do you do when you see a Spaceman?
park your car, man.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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horse walks into a bar and the bartender says hey why the long face?
also, chingon's are very funny.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What's so great about having sex with a pregnant chick?
Handjob same time
zero tacos. that is gross.
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Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?"
The old woman replies shyly, "Depends... ."
gross but kinda funny
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A group of 3rd graders was given a "taste test" at school one day. Blindfolded, the first little girl gets an apple slice and say's "Mrs. Smith, that tastes like apple". The teacher says, "Very good, Mary. You may take your seat."
The second boy gets an orange wedge and says, "Mrs. Smith, that was orange". She says, "Very good, Robert. You may take your seat."
Next up is Johnny with Billy to follow. She unwraps a Hershey's kiss and gives it to Johnny. He eats and and says, "I'm not sure what that was, Mrs. Smith." The teacher, thinking that Johnny is just trying to get another piece of chocolate decides to give him a "hint" rather than more of the delicious candy... Mrs. Smith says, "I'll give you a hint, Johnny. It's something that your mommy gives your daddy every night when they go to bed."
Billy spins around and says, "Spit it out, Johnny!!! It's a piece of ass!!!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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So little Johnny is in class taking in a vocabulary lesson. One of the words is dictate, and the teacher asks Johnny to use it in a sentence. He says:
"My momma's always complainin' because she don't like the way my daddy's dictate."
I knew a way better set up for that punch line Emo.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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The FBI had an opening for an assassin.
After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists: two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you find your wife sitting in a chair...kill her!"
The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."
The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet.
The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. "This gun is loaded with blanks" she said.
"I had to kill him with the chair!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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How do you make a tissue dance?
put a little boogie in it
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I don't have any, for say, jokes. But I got a true story to tell. When I was a young man, I had the most wonderful hunting dog known to man. One day my neighbor asked to barrow my dog for a hunting trip in western Kansas. After a couple of weeks, I went over to the neighbor's place to get my dog. He looked sadly at me and said he had to shoot my dog. I asked him why he would do that. He proceeds to tell me about his hunting trip. "We go hunting for geese and Tex, my dog's name, looked straight up in the sky in the middle of a field and then scrapes the ground with his paw three times. Sure enough, three geese flew right over us. Later on, we're in a boat on the Smokey River and it's really windy. We are getting close to a bend in the river and Tex curves his front paw around in the shape of the bend. Then picks up a wood hammer we happen to have in the boat and shakes his head a half dozen times. Well what do you think was around the bend, if you're guessing 6 mallard ducks, you're correct." At that point I asked what in the world would make you want to kill my wonderful hunter partner. "We decided to go hunting for ducks on farm ponds. We're walking up to the berm of this huge pond and just before we get there, your dog finds a mud hole and starts to roll in it and then picks up a stick and shakes it violently. It looks like the dog had gone mad, so I shot him."
My eyes got the size of red hot boulders, when I told that stupid son of duck mucker that Tex was telling them there were more mud ducks on that pond than you could shake a stick at. :curse:
Tacos???
too many words for such a mediocre payoff
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Q: What did the fish say when he hit is head???
A:....."Dam"
:ROFL: holy crap it gets me every time
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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My penis. Girls usually laugh at it so it has to be taco worthy?
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What did the bug say just before he hit the car windshield at 70 MPH. "That takes guts!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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So a termite walks into So Long and asks "is the bar tender here?"
I liked that you made it about MHK
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What did the bug say just before he hit the car windshield at 70 MPH. "That takes guts!"
To add to that. What's the last thing that goes through a bug's brain when it hits a windshield?
It's ass.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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CF3's promptness in judging jokes in this thread :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What do you get when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito?
Nothing, you cant cross a scalar with a vector.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Two gay guys walked into a bar in western kansas.
Everything went great because the owners were very nice and accepting.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
YES! SWEET VICTORY
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Potato
zero tacos
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Punch line only:
Rectum? It damn near killed him!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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On orange cat was sitting on a fence watching a squirrel run across the lawn. The cat yells, "Hey man, why in such a big hurry?" The squirrel turns back and shouts, "Because I don't want you to eat me bro!", to which the cat replies "Oh that makes sense, too bad it's Lent though and I have given up eating squirrels, so you can just relax." The squirrel doesn't stop running though because it knew that cat was at best a Christmas/Easter cat. Unfortunately, a Methodist owl was in the tree and ate Mr. Squirrel :frown:.
But its ok because Mr. Squirrel was a serial killer :ROFL:.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
That's our 2nd 5 taco joke! :ksu:
Besides just being a joke, that's one of the best things ever written on this blog
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CF3's promptness in judging jokes in this thread :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Those are unauthorized tacos. Only I may taco.
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What's the difference in and egg, your wife, your meat, and a blowjob?
You can beat and egg.
You can beat your wife.
You can even beat your meat!,
But.......
You just can't beat a good blowjob.
Gonna win 'em all!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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wow. that was a lot of taco'ing. Great job by all.
Go Cats.
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CF3's promptness in judging jokes in this thread :lol: :lol: :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Those are unauthorized tacos. Only I may taco.
2 unbiased judges giving that joke 4 tacos a piece :Woot:
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Potato
zero tacos
I told it wrong.
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What's the difference in and egg, your wife, your meat, and a blowjob?
You can beat and egg.
You can beat your wife.
You can even beat your meat!,
But.......
You just can't beat a good blowjob.
Gonna win 'em all!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
What if I had called them huevos rancheros and referred to your wife as a señorita, and called it a Mexican blowjob?
Gonna win 'em all!
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Three engineers are riding in a car.
One is a mechanical engineer, one is an electrical engineer, and one is a computer engineer.
The car breaks down and coasts to the side of the road.
"Hang on," says the mechanical engineer. "The problem is probably the engine, let me have a look at it and I'll have us on the road again in no time."
"Wait," says the electrical engineer. "The way it just stopped like that, I think it's the electrical system. Let me have a look and I'll get us going again in a minute or two."
"Hold on," says the computer engineer. "Why don't we all just get out of the car and get in again, and then see if it starts?"
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weak engineering joke.
two engineers are debating about what kind of engineer designed a woman.
the first engineer, an electrical engineer says, "It must be an electrical engineer. Women's minds are so complicated!"
the second engineer, a mechanical engineer says, "It must be a mechanical engineer. Women move so swiftly and beautifully."
the first engineer chimes back "Nah, must be a civil engineer. Who else would put a sewage system right next to a playground?!"
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Three engineers walked into a bar. They ran up a super high tab but it was cool because they all have good jobs because they went to K-State.
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Three engineers walked into a bar. They ran up a super high tab but it was cool because they all have good jobs because they went to K-State.
this is a joke thread not a facts thread benja. lock it up
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Three engineers walk into a bar. They don't talk to anyone, including each other, because they're socially awkward and don't understand interpersonal relationships.
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Three engineers walk into a bar. They don't talk to anyone, including each other, because they're socially awkward and don't understand interpersonal relationships.
Three Spracne's walk into a bar. Everyone is nice though because we're salt of the earth types, and hey, it's just message boarding. How 'bout them royals?
-
A boulder and a pebble are standing on a cliff. Which one jumps first?
The pebble because he's a little bolder.
-
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I can't get hard, I just got laid by a chick.
-
Einstein, Pascal, and Newton are playing hide and seek.
Einstein starts counting. Pascal runs off. Newton stays put and draws a square in the dirt.
Einstein looks up and says that was easy, found you Newton. Newton says no, you found Pascal. One Newton per meter squared.
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
-
A poet, a priest, and an engineer are sentenced to being executed by guillotine. Poet is up first but the guillotine jams. Executioner says I only get one shot, you must be an amazing poet. You're free. Priest is up next, same thing, jams up. Executioner says it must be because you are a man of God. You are free. The engineer is last and with his head on the block looks up and says "Hey I think I see the problem."
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Einstein, Pascal, and Newton are playing hide and seek.
Einstein starts counting. Pascal runs off. Newton stays put and draws a square in the dirt.
Einstein looks up and says that was easy, found you Newton. Newton says no, you found Pascal. One Newton per meter squared.
:dubious:
:D
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1346.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fp684%2FThe_Big_Train%2F5E0C7EA6-D016-4207-B953-04513F591424_zpspq6fekg9.jpg&hash=3d011213743287f4a506ecb855676535b524fd40)
http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=5757.850
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umm guys, i don't think cf3 is grading jokes anymore. pretty sure the deadline was sometime last week. via con dios tho
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eff. I forgot where I got that one from
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Your jokes will be tacoed tomorrow but I need to get to bed.
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A salmon is swimming in a stream and it is watching a fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches he'd jump up to get the fly.
A bear is watching the salmon watch the fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches the salmon would jump up to get the fly, and he would get the salmon.
A hunter is watching the bear watch the salmon watch the fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches the salmon would jump up to get the fly, the bear would get the salmon & and he would shoot the bear.
A mouse is watching the hunter watch the bear watch the salmon watching the fly thinking if the fly would just drop 6 inches, the salmon would jump up to get the fly, the bear would get salmon the hunter would get the bear and he would get the hunters cheese sandwich.
A cat is watching the mouse watch the hunter watch the bear watch the salmon watch the fly thinking if the fly would just drop 6 inches, the salmon would get the fly, the bear would get the salmon the hunter would shoot the bear, the mouse would get the cheese sandwich and he would get the mouse.
This goes on for a few minutes when finally...
The fly drops 6 inches, the salmon gets the fly, the bear gets the salmon, the hunter shoots the bear, the mouse gets the cheese sandwich, and the cat goes for the mouse but falls in the stream instead.
The moral of the story?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Every time a fly drops 6 inches a pussy is bound to get wet. :thumbsup:
Try telling this joke when you are 3 sheets to the wind. :cheers:
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Pretty wordy
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i don't get it
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A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink. After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl.
2. The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3. I'm a 6 feet tall, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares, "Nope! Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
-
Man he served those uppity b-words right up.
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CF3 promising he would taco the current jokes yesterday :lol:
-
So three guys walked into a KU football game and ....
That's it. That's the joke! :ROFL:
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Three engineers are riding in a car.
One is a mechanical engineer, one is an electrical engineer, and one is a computer engineer.
The car breaks down and coasts to the side of the road.
"Hang on," says the mechanical engineer. "The problem is probably the engine, let me have a look at it and I'll have us on the road again in no time."
"Wait," says the electrical engineer. "The way it just stopped like that, I think it's the electrical system. Let me have a look and I'll get us going again in a minute or two."
"Hold on," says the computer engineer. "Why don't we all just get out of the car and get in again, and then see if it starts?"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
weak engineering joke.
two engineers are debating about what kind of engineer designed a woman.
the first engineer, an electrical engineer says, "It must be an electrical engineer. Women's minds are so complicated!"
the second engineer, a mechanical engineer says, "It must be a mechanical engineer. Women move so swiftly and beautifully."
the first engineer chimes back "Nah, must be a civil engineer. Who else would put a sewage system right next to a playground?!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Three engineers walked into a bar. They ran up a super high tab but it was cool because they all have good jobs because they went to K-State.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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:jerk:
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Three engineers walk into a bar. They don't talk to anyone, including each other, because they're socially awkward and don't understand interpersonal relationships.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Three engineers walk into a bar. They don't talk to anyone, including each other, because they're socially awkward and don't understand interpersonal relationships.
Three Spracne's walk into a bar. Everyone is nice though because we're salt of the earth types, and hey, it's just message boarding. How 'bout them royals?
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A boulder and a pebble are standing on a cliff. Which one jumps first?
The pebble because he's a little bolder.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I can't get hard, I just got laid by a chick.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Einstein, Pascal, and Newton are playing hide and seek.
Einstein starts counting. Pascal runs off. Newton stays put and draws a square in the dirt.
Einstein looks up and says that was easy, found you Newton. Newton says no, you found Pascal. One Newton per meter squared.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A poet, a priest, and an engineer are sentenced to being executed by guillotine. Poet is up first but the guillotine jams. Executioner says I only get one shot, you must be an amazing poet. You're free. Priest is up next, same thing, jams up. Executioner says it must be because you are a man of God. You are free. The engineer is last and with his head on the block looks up and says "Hey I think I see the problem."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A salmon is swimming in a stream and it is watching a fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches he'd jump up to get the fly.
A bear is watching the salmon watch the fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches the salmon would jump up to get the fly, and he would get the salmon.
A hunter is watching the bear watch the salmon watch the fly thinking if that fly would just drop 6 inches the salmon would jump up to get the fly, the bear would get the salmon & and he would shoot the bear.
A mouse is watching the hunter watch the bear watch the salmon watching the fly thinking if the fly would just drop 6 inches, the salmon would jump up to get the fly, the bear would get salmon the hunter would get the bear and he would get the hunters cheese sandwich.
A cat is watching the mouse watch the hunter watch the bear watch the salmon watch the fly thinking if the fly would just drop 6 inches, the salmon would get the fly, the bear would get the salmon the hunter would shoot the bear, the mouse would get the cheese sandwich and he would get the mouse.
This goes on for a few minutes when finally...
The fly drops 6 inches, the salmon gets the fly, the bear gets the salmon, the hunter shoots the bear, the mouse gets the cheese sandwich, and the cat goes for the mouse but falls in the stream instead.
The moral of the story?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Every time a fly drops 6 inches a pussy is bound to get wet. :thumbsup:
Try telling this joke when you are 3 sheets to the wind. :cheers:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Rule #1: Know your audience. Engineering jokes? Really?
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that's why my food puns are dominating this thing kids
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Why did the student eat his homework?
The teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
-
a roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says "five beers please."
-
a buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "make me one with everything."
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So three guys walked into a KU football game and ....
That's it. That's the joke! :ROFL:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink. After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl.
2. The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3. I'm a 6 feet tall, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares, "Nope! Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
oldie but a goodie
CF3 promising he would taco the current jokes yesterday :lol:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Why did the student eat his homework?
The teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
a roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says "five beers please."
luked
a buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "make me one with everything."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A drunk walks into a bar, orders a shot and and immediately pukes all over his own shirt. "Wha' my gonna do now? My wifez gonna kill me."
"Relax," the bartender says, "give me a five-dollar bill." The bartender folds up the bill and puts it in the guy's shirt pocket. "Tell your wife some drunk puked on you and gave you five bucks to have your shirt cleaned."
"Thass a great idea!"
When the drunk gets home his wife answers the door. "Where have you been? What happened to your shirt?"
He tries to put on a sober voice and says, "Relaaax honey, some drunk guy puked on me and gave me five bucks to have my shirt cleaned."
The drunk's wife reaches in his pocket, grabs the money, and says, "There's $10 in here!"
"Oh yeah, he sh*t my pants, too."
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A pirate walks into a GAP Kids with a ship's steering wheel protruding from his fly. A kid says, "scuse me, Ser, but did you know you have a ship's steering wheel coming out of your fly?"
"Arrrrrg, I know," he replied. "It's driving me nuts."
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A drunk walks into a bar, orders a shot and and immediately pukes all over his own shirt. "Wha' my gonna do now? My wifez gonna kill me."
"Relax," the bartender says, "give me a five-dollar bill." The bartender folds up the bill and puts it in the guy's shirt pocket. "Tell your wife some drunk puked on you and gave you five bucks to have your shirt cleaned."
"Thass a great idea!"
When the drunk gets home his wife answers the door. "Where have you been? What happened to your shirt?"
He tries to put on a sober voice and says, "Relaaax honey, some drunk guy puked on me and gave me five bucks to have my shirt cleaned."
The drunk's wife reaches in his pocket, grabs the money, and says, "There's $10 in here!"
"Oh yeah, he sh*t my pants, too."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A pirate walks into a GAP Kids with a ship's steering wheel protruding from his fly. A kid says, "scuse me, Ser, but did you know you have a ship's steering wheel coming out of your fly?"
"Arrrrrg, I know," he replied. "It's driving me nuts."
zero tacos. The Gap kids part is unneeded for the punch line and just makes it creepy. If you're gonna be gross it better add to the humor of the joke.
-
A drunk walks into a bar, orders a shot and and immediately pukes all over his own shirt. "Wha' my gonna do now? My wifez gonna kill me."
"Relax," the bartender says, "give me a five-dollar bill." The bartender folds up the bill and puts it in the guy's shirt pocket. "Tell your wife some drunk puked on you and gave you five bucks to have your shirt cleaned."
"Thass a great idea!"
When the drunk gets home his wife answers the door. "Where have you been? What happened to your shirt?"
He tries to put on a sober voice and says, "Relaaax honey, some drunk guy puked on me and gave me five bucks to have my shirt cleaned."
The drunk's wife reaches in his pocket, grabs the money, and says, "There's $10 in here!"
"Oh yeah, he sh*t my pants, too."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A pirate walks into a GAP Kids with a ship's steering wheel protruding from his fly. A kid says, "scuse me, Ser, but did you know you have a ship's steering wheel coming out of your fly?"
"Arrrrrg, I know," he replied. "It's driving me nuts."
zero tacos. The Gap kids part is unneeded for the punch line and just makes it creepy. If you're gonna be gross it better add to the humor of the joke.
Subtext: the pirate has dwarfism
-
A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchen. A brother is frying chips. 'Are you the friar?' he asks. 'No. I'm the chip monk'
-
A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchen. A brother is frying chips. 'Are you the friar?' he asks. 'No. I'm the chip monk'
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
-
SD's sense of humor seems to largely rely on puns.
-
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.
-
Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh
-
What's Forrest Gump's password?
1forrest1
-
I admire sd always keeping it family friendly
-
I admire sd always keeping it family friendly
yes, they are good puns.
-
Q: What do you get when you cross a clam with an owl?
A: You get a mussel that wants to stay up all night.
-
Three Blonde girls are lost in the woods when they come across some tracks.
The first blonde says "These look like Bear tracks"
The second blonde says "No, I've seen tracks like these before, they are definitely Deer Tracks"
The third blonde says "No no no! These are wolf tracks!"
After 2 hours of arguing they are hit and killed by a train.
-
Fascist thread
Sent from my HTC One_M8 using Tapatalk
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Man walks into a Soup & Salad House. He orders soup. He sees a hair in the soup and tells the waitress that he's not paying for the filthy dirty soup. He then walks over to the local House of Favors. The waitress follows, because can't figure our what a picky man like that would be doing in a place like that. She opens the door to the room he is in, and to her surprise, she sees the guy with his head buried in this gal's muff. She YELLS at the man, "You son-of-a-bitch, you wouldn't pay for the soup, but here you are buried in muff!" The guy pulls his head out and YELLS back, "And if there's a noodle in here, I'm not paying for this either!"
-
1 pink taco
-
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
What's Forrest Gump's password?
1forrest1
I dunno I just like this one
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
-
Q: What do you get when you cross a clam with an owl?
A: You get a mussel that wants to stay up all night.
not sure i get it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Three Blonde girls are lost in the woods when they come across some tracks.
The first blonde says "These look like Bear tracks"
The second blonde says "No, I've seen tracks like these before, they are definitely Deer Tracks"
The third blonde says "No no no! These are wolf tracks!"
After 2 hours of arguing they are hit and killed by a train.
oh man! didn't see it coming!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Man walks into a Soup & Salad House. He orders soup. He sees a hair in the soup and tells the waitress that he's not paying for the filthy dirty soup. He then walks over to the local House of Favors. The waitress follows, because can't figure our what a picky man like that would be doing in a place like that. She opens the door to the room he is in, and to her surprise, she sees the guy with his head buried in this gal's muff. She YELLS at the man, "You son-of-a-bitch, you wouldn't pay for the soup, but here you are buried in muff!" The guy pulls his head out and YELLS back, "And if there's a noodle in here, I'm not paying for this either!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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A drunk walks into a bar, orders a shot and and immediately pukes all over his own shirt. "Wha' my gonna do now? My wifez gonna kill me."
"Relax," the bartender says, "give me a five-dollar bill." The bartender folds up the bill and puts it in the guy's shirt pocket. "Tell your wife some drunk puked on you and gave you five bucks to have your shirt cleaned."
"Thass a great idea!"
When the drunk gets home his wife answers the door. "Where have you been? What happened to your shirt?"
He tries to put on a sober voice and says, "Relaaax honey, some drunk guy puked on me and gave me five bucks to have my shirt cleaned."
The drunk's wife reaches in his pocket, grabs the money, and says, "There's $10 in here!"
"Oh yeah, he sh*t my pants, too."
This is my go to joke lately....
-
What is the last thing you want to hear when sucking Willie Nelson's dick?
I'm not Willie Nelson.
-
Cuantas estrellas hay en el cielo?
cincuenta.
SIN CUENTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL:
-
Que es venganza?
no no no, es lo que el ganzo le dice a la ganza!!!! :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL:
-
What does a pirate hate the most?
A small chest and no booty.
-
An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball.
"I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?"
The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid."
"That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?"
"Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
:ROFL:
-
What does Mexican Elvis say?
Gracias. Muchas gracias.
-
What does Japanese Elvis say?
Domo. Domo. Domo alrigato mr roboto
Gonna win 'em all!
-
What is the last thing you want to hear when sucking Willie Nelson's dick?
I'm not Willie Nelson.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Cuantas estrellas hay en el cielo?
cincuenta.
SIN CUENTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL:
zero tacos
Que es venganza?
no no no, es lo que el ganzo le dice a la ganza!!!! :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL:
zero tacos
What does a pirate hate the most?
A small chest and no booty.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball.
"I got to ask, sir," says the bartender. "What happened?"
The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return to the States. My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need. Finally, my third wish was to have sex with the mermaid."
"That doesn't sound too bad," says the bartender. "Then what happened?"
"Well," sighs the man, "mermaids can't have sex, so I asked her if I could just have a little head... ."
:ROFL:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
-
What does Mexican Elvis say?
Gracias. Muchas gracias.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
What does Japanese Elvis say?
Domo. Domo. Domo alrigato mr roboto
Gonna win 'em all!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Vendetta noted.
-
Vendetta noted.
i don't speak spanish. foreign language jokes always get zero tacos
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How many stars are in the sky.
Cincuenta means 50.
Sin cuenta mean like no account or no way to count. They are homonyms.
What is vengeance? = que es venganza.
No no no. It's what the male goose says to the female goose.
Ven ganza = come female goose.
:D
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How many stars are in the sky.
Cincuenta means 50.
Sin cuenta mean like no account or no way to count. They are homonyms.
What is vengeance? = que es venganza.
No no no. It's what the male goose says to the female goose.
Ven ganza = come female goose.
:D
nothing personal but i'm sticking with zero tacos. too complicated
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OK :D
-
CartierForHardass
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Two white guys take their Asian friend out camping for the first time. They drive up close to a forest, and wander until they find a good spot for the night. One guy says "I'm going to go get fire wood, (points at the other white guy) you go get some stumps for us to sit on (points at the Asian guy) and you go get the supplies.
The white guys return to the camp site about the same time, with their Asian friend nowhere to be found. They get worried, so they go to the car where the supplies were. Everything is still there, so they go ahead and grab everything and start to take it back to the camp site. About half way there their Asian friend jumps out from behind and tree and yells, "SUPPLIES!!!"
-
I hope michigancat scolds you for that blatantly racist "joke"
-
I sat on it for a while. Twice while typing it I thought of deleting it. Oh well, no turning back now!
-
Your mama is so nasty I went over to her house the other day, and when I asked her what we were having for dinner she propped her foot up on the table and said, "Corn!"
-
Sometimes when people fart I tell them that if they were a boxer their name would be gaseous clay.
-
Your mama is so nasty I went over to her house the other day, and when I asked her what we were having for dinner she propped her foot up on the table and said, "Corn!"
:barf:
-
Your mama is so fat, she should probably be concerned about contracting type 2 diabetes
Sent from my HTC One_M8 using Tapatalk
-
I sat on it for a while. Twice while typing it I thought of deleting it. Oh well, no turning back now!
You should change it to a joke that has nothing to do with race and then seven's post will look ridiculous. That alone will probably have you swimming in tacos.
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TOOLS AND HOW TO USE THEM
SKIL SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Feastcoastallstars.net%2Fwp-admin%2Fuser%2Fdewalt-skil-saw-guide-7619.jpg&hash=a5e54b07dd5fe3364b6581251906df1118670051)
A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.
BELT SANDER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.machinemart.co.uk%2Fimages%2Flibrary%2Fproduct%2Fhuge%2F06%2F060313080.jpg&hash=ce1e9ec118cac930b4ca1972d01dffb142f6cd04)
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
WIRE WHEEL:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mhsindustrial.com%2Fthumbnail.asp%3Ffile%3Dassets%2Fimages%2FIncom%2F301166.jpg%26amp%3Bmaxx%3D300%26amp%3Bmaxy%3D0&hash=55f5737efae683449c82a4a2bac21a6913da5703)
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh crap'.
DRILL PRESS:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.machinemart.co.uk%2Fimages%2Flibrary%2Fproduct%2Fhuge%2F06%2F060710005.jpg&hash=0e66ce99f538a927f57fb764c7fb6b515345d729)
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
Channel Locks:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.toolup.com%2Fimages%2FProduct%2Flarge%2FChannel-Lock-422.jpg&hash=a52483958ca4601cb81c6771b9679d349a84942c)
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
HACKSAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.beatsons.co.uk%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fzoom%2F1350492416-67135600.jpg&hash=5dc19783e019acce82cda5f53e7b7c17164f2d57)
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fhi.atgimg.com%2Fimg%2Fx%2F3772%2F038548990699_ca.jpg&hash=c48393e63ab0b69387a4fde6c331c548e35540a6)
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foxyacetylenetorch.net%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fs_torch2.jpg&hash=cffc01293bf8d330a85f2439b428daa75753593f)
Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects in your shop and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.macma.co.nz%2Fimages%2Fmj2325b.jpg&hash=222ba50d305ea77d7de8e238d43e3a724cb745f7)
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
Very effective for digit removal !!
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mile-x.com%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fdetail%2F5106_1958.jpg&hash=ba0899e050233db13c876ea805de57ca62d6ec33)
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
BAND SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.baileighindustrial.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F5%2Fbase%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fv%2Fe%2Fvertical-band-saw-bsv16.jpg&hash=3fd30960b7bae2117b94b439bccc042ca477346b)
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homedepot.com%2Fcatalog%2FproductImages%2F400%2F04%2F04a2167a-2e81-4461-bc0a-f5e07371eea0_400.jpg&hash=7dc9a78c67ba53b6df9a2a81b0c5c2d1be120413)
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the crap you forgot to disconnect.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.beatsons.co.uk%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fzoom%2F1350492285-97836800.jpg&hash=9e4332472c62556e4eb453a21a5093c13e98ce35)
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rapidonline.com%2Fcatalogueimages%2FModule%2FM518630P01WL.jpg&hash=ef643e137a7c250a4c65f27193683e1d87fea212)
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
PRY BAR:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.beatsons.co.uk%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fzoom%2F1350488722-01808500.jpg&hash=ee4d1c32a960b2acf3f119fb6b26903b7045cd5d)
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
PVC PIPE CUTTER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.harborfreight.com%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F1%2Fimage%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fi%2Fm%2Fimage_20545.jpg&hash=ce8c8d122372a8647443cc03bc5e997fb1acc4a4)
A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.
HAMMER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstanleyhandtoolsmediakit.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F04%2F51-505a.jpg&hash=c58346c5e28fb2573bca8c18f0d519e25371f485)
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
UTILITY KNIFE:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.harborfreight.com%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F1%2Fimage%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fi%2Fm%2Fimage_18437.jpg%3F01AD%3D34C15VAX6IgCUAT4U3nrOnnsBIr_SC5vzm6sVNOJecUbwGmTrVplCTQ%26amp%3B01RI%3D9EADF4B31B5198A%26amp%3B01NA%3D&hash=1df4ba5afba21043561a7cb08e12b7f0d07151a2)
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door. Works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
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I don't get it :confused:
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I think it's guide for people that aren't tool savvy at all.
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you didn't post a picture of a skil saw
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Whatever a GPC taco would look like is what I give that joke.
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I call them flathead screwdrivers.
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I call them flathead screwdrivers.
yes, more correct than straight
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5 daris tacos. I smiled throughout that whole thing.
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you didn't post a picture of a skil saw
noticed this as well but let it slide because skilsaw is just the site jargon. only ever used a "skilsaw" once. all others were dewalt.
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Whatever a GPC taco would look like is what I give that joke.
What's "GPC"?
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Me: Somebody told me you sound like an owl.
Some sucker: Who?
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Two white guys take their Asian friend out camping for the first time. They drive up close to a forest, and wander until they find a good spot for the night. One guy says "I'm going to go get fire wood, (points at the other white guy) you go get some stumps for us to sit on (points at the Asian guy) and you go get the supplies.
The white guys return to the camp site about the same time, with their Asian friend nowhere to be found. They get worried, so they go to the car where the supplies were. Everything is still there, so they go ahead and grab everything and start to take it back to the camp site. About half way there their Asian friend jumps out from behind and tree and yells, "SUPPLIES!!!"
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Your mama is so nasty I went over to her house the other day, and when I asked her what we were having for dinner she propped her foot up on the table and said, "Corn!"
Gross. Also very 4th grade nicname.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Sometimes when people fart I tell them that if they were a boxer their name would be gaseous clay.
much better nicname!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Your mama is so fat, she should probably be concerned about contracting type 2 diabetes
Sent from my HTC One_M8 using Tapatalk
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)TOOLS AND HOW TO USE THEM
SKIL SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Feastcoastallstars.net%2Fwp-admin%2Fuser%2Fdewalt-skil-saw-guide-7619.jpg&hash=a5e54b07dd5fe3364b6581251906df1118670051)
A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.
BELT SANDER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.machinemart.co.uk%2Fimages%2Flibrary%2Fproduct%2Fhuge%2F06%2F060313080.jpg&hash=ce1e9ec118cac930b4ca1972d01dffb142f6cd04)
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
WIRE WHEEL:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mhsindustrial.com%2Fthumbnail.asp%3Ffile%3Dassets%2Fimages%2FIncom%2F301166.jpg%26amp%3Bmaxx%3D300%26amp%3Bmaxy%3D0&hash=55f5737efae683449c82a4a2bac21a6913da5703)
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh crap'.
DRILL PRESS:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.machinemart.co.uk%2Fimages%2Flibrary%2Fproduct%2Fhuge%2F06%2F060710005.jpg&hash=0e66ce99f538a927f57fb764c7fb6b515345d729)
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
Channel Locks:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.toolup.com%2Fimages%2FProduct%2Flarge%2FChannel-Lock-422.jpg&hash=a52483958ca4601cb81c6771b9679d349a84942c)
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
HACKSAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.beatsons.co.uk%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fzoom%2F1350492416-67135600.jpg&hash=5dc19783e019acce82cda5f53e7b7c17164f2d57)
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fhi.atgimg.com%2Fimg%2Fx%2F3772%2F038548990699_ca.jpg&hash=c48393e63ab0b69387a4fde6c331c548e35540a6)
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foxyacetylenetorch.net%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fs_torch2.jpg&hash=cffc01293bf8d330a85f2439b428daa75753593f)
Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects in your shop and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.macma.co.nz%2Fimages%2Fmj2325b.jpg&hash=222ba50d305ea77d7de8e238d43e3a724cb745f7)
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
Very effective for digit removal !!
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mile-x.com%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fdetail%2F5106_1958.jpg&hash=ba0899e050233db13c876ea805de57ca62d6ec33)
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
BAND SAW:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.baileighindustrial.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F5%2Fbase%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fv%2Fe%2Fvertical-band-saw-bsv16.jpg&hash=3fd30960b7bae2117b94b439bccc042ca477346b)
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homedepot.com%2Fcatalog%2FproductImages%2F400%2F04%2F04a2167a-2e81-4461-bc0a-f5e07371eea0_400.jpg&hash=7dc9a78c67ba53b6df9a2a81b0c5c2d1be120413)
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the crap you forgot to disconnect.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.beatsons.co.uk%2Fimages%2Fproducts%2Fzoom%2F1350492285-97836800.jpg&hash=9e4332472c62556e4eb453a21a5093c13e98ce35)
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rapidonline.com%2Fcatalogueimages%2FModule%2FM518630P01WL.jpg&hash=ef643e137a7c250a4c65f27193683e1d87fea212)
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
PRY BAR:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amsisupply.com%2Fgraphics%2Fhammer%2520and%2520pry%2FMIB7-pry-bar-large.gif&hash=70191fc79135ac20164e3b24bbe381c2589b8e5d)
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
PVC PIPE CUTTER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.harborfreight.com%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F1%2Fimage%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fi%2Fm%2Fimage_20545.jpg&hash=ce8c8d122372a8647443cc03bc5e997fb1acc4a4)
A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.
HAMMER:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstanleyhandtoolsmediakit.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F04%2F51-505a.jpg&hash=c58346c5e28fb2573bca8c18f0d519e25371f485)
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
UTILITY KNIFE:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.harborfreight.com%2Fmedia%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F1%2Fimage%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2Fi%2Fm%2Fimage_18437.jpg%3F01AD%3D34C15VAX6IgCUAT4U3nrOnnsBIr_SC5vzm6sVNOJecUbwGmTrVplCTQ%26amp%3B01RI%3D9EADF4B31B5198A%26amp%3B01NA%3D&hash=1df4ba5afba21043561a7cb08e12b7f0d07151a2)
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door. Works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
Its very Father's Day Card or Tim the Tool Man Taylory, but still:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Me: Somebody told me you sound like an owl.
Some sucker: Who?
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Today I saw a dwarf prisoner climbing down a wall. As he sneered at me, I thought, "That's a little condescending."
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Today I saw a dwarf prisoner climbing down a wall. As he sneered at me, I thought, "That's a little condescending."
i would have italicized little condescending (no bold)
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Today I saw a dwarf prisoner climbing down a wall. As he sneered at me, I thought, "That's a little condescending."
i would have italicized little condescending (no bold)
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I dunno, when I tell it, I say the word condescending with a lot of emphasis for some reason. Then I just stare at your with my eyebrows cocked and a weird half smirk.
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And then that's usually a good time for you to walk away.
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And then I ask if you want to hear my ghandi joke
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I call them flathead screwdrivers.
yes, more correct than straight
phillips not cross tip or standard right?
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Fun fact about Phillips head screwdrivers: they are actually designed to slip out and thus avoid overtorquing. Pozidriv is much more secure. :nerd:
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I dunno, when I tell it, I say the word condescending with a lot of emphasis for some reason. Then I just stare at your with my eyebrows cocked and a weird half smirk.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmetrouk2.files.wordpress.com%2F2014%2F06%2Fgot-gif.gif&hash=a6551d52138c97acbe73b549d5f9cffd89649acb)
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I dunno, when I tell it, I say the word condescending with a lot of emphasis for some reason. Then I just stare at your with my eyebrows cocked and a weird half smirk.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmetrouk2.files.wordpress.com%2F2014%2F06%2Fgot-gif.gif&hash=a6551d52138c97acbe73b549d5f9cffd89649acb)
YES SPRACNE!
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So Ghandi, I dunno if you guys know, but he walked around barefoot most of the time.
He also ate very little, which made him very frail, and with his odd diet, suffered from bad breath...
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
:surprised:
:ROFL:
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Oh man. Well, that's enough hilarity for one day. You guys have yourselves a nice evening.
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I enjoyed them both
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Today I saw a dwarf prisoner climbing down a wall. As he sneered at me, I thought, "That's a little condescending."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
So Ghandi, I dunno if you guys know, but he walked around barefoot most of the time.
He also ate very little, which made him very frail, and with his odd diet, suffered from bad breath...
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
:surprised:
:ROFL:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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knock knock.
whos' there?
wah.
wah who?
good grief, calm down.
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Bill Clinton and mother teresa died at the same time. For some reason there was a mix up and MT was sent to hell and Bill was sent to heaven. As soon as God found this out, he quickly made the switch. As Bill was falling down and MT was rising up, MT asked Bill:
"Bill, please tell me! How was the virgin mary? Is she as glorious as i've heard?"
His response:
"Mother Teresa, all I know, is she is glorious and she isn't a virgin no more. ;) :giggdygiggdy:"
:lol: This is the only joke I knew as a kid. They told it all the time at my dads work. :Ugh:
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knock knock.
whos' there?
wah.
wah who?
good grief, calm down.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Its a 2 taco level on humor but 3 taco level for the "good grief"
Rule 1. Know your crowd.
Bill Clinton and mother teresa died at the same time. For some reason there was a mix up and MT was sent to hell and Bill was sent to heaven. As soon as God found this out, he quickly made the switch. As Bill was falling down and MT was rising up, MT asked Bill:
"Bill, please tell me! How was the virgin mary? Is she as glorious as i've heard?"
His response:
"Mother Teresa, all I know, is she is glorious and she isn't a virgin no more. ;) :giggdygiggdy:"
:lol: This is the only joke I knew as a kid. They told it all the time at my dads work. :Ugh:
negative 1 tacos.
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what if he had used bill clinton voice?
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what if he had used bill clinton voice?
negative 2 tacos. Bill Clinton is horny, George W Bush is stupid, etc are the lowest hanging fruit in humor. Presidential jokes are lame. They are Jay Leno material.
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:don'tcare:
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The tacos mean something. I want you to feel like you've accomplished something if you get 5 taco'd. Even 4 tacos is something to be proud of. If I start handing out tacos like participation ribbons they lose value and have no meaning.
-
Did I tell you guys about the agnostic dyslexic insomniac? (stop me if you've heard this one)
-
what if he had used bill clinton voice?
negative 2 tacos. Bill Clinton is horny, George W Bush is stupid, etc are the lowest hanging fruit in humor. Presidential jokes are lame. They are Jay Leno material.
I guess, then, that it wouldn't be prudent for me to share my H.W. Bush sidesplitter...
-
He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
:sdeek:
-
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fx2.fjcdn.com%2Fthumbnails%2Fcomments%2Fi%2Bm%2BPutin%2Bthis%2Bin%2Bmy%2B.gif%2Bfolder%2B_2b17171d5bde8791041985bc4d74a47a.jpeg&hash=136af2a24f203a6f3595ba625d617ba11eec940c)
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what if he had used bill clinton voice?
negative 2 tacos. Bill Clinton is horny, George W Bush is stupid, etc are the lowest hanging fruit in humor. Presidential jokes are lame. They are Jay Leno material.
I guess, then, that it wouldn't be prudent for me to share my H.W. Bush sidesplitter...
up to you but be prepared to live the the tacoquences
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I just don't think he got it you guys. He banged her. Duh! :Ugh:
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He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
:sdeek:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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How do you drown a hipster?
In the mainstream.
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How do you drown a hipster?
In the mainstream.
I liked it!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I just don't think he got it you guys. He banged her. Duh! :Ugh:
yeah we got it bud. not really a head scratcher.
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He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
:sdeek:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
yes! two rough ridin' tacos!
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How do you drown a hipster?
In the mainstream.
that's a really great joke.
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i liked it too
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He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
:sdeek:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
wacky, I don't think cartier got this joke either. I mean, he's an insomniac, so he's staying up most nights. Secondly, he's agnostic, so like, he's not sure about the whole god thing. Lastly, he's dyslexic, so when he wonders about god in the middle of the night, he has a tendency to spell the word "god", backwards, spelling it "dog". Hence the funny.
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I've got another hipster joke.
Who was the first hipster?
You've probably never heard of him.
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I've got another hipster joke.
Who was the first hipster?
You've probably never heard of him.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
MOAR
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Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.
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What happens when a Hipster falls?
They Tumblr
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Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.
A frapp is a blended drink, aka served cold. /blow huge holes in hipster jokes with Stevesie60
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He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
:sdeek:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
wacky, I don't think cartier got this joke either. I mean, he's an insomniac, so he's staying up most nights. Secondly, he's agnostic, so like, he's not sure about the whole god thing. Lastly, he's dyslexic, so when he wonders about god in the middle of the night, he has a tendency to spell the word "god", backwards, spelling it "dog". Hence the funny.
of course, i'm not sure why he'd be spelling things that he's thinking about, but you know, you kind of have to deal with that logic gap for the joke to work.
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Why do hipsters love using the subway?
Because its underground.
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How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Some obscure number you've probably never heard of.
-
I've got another hipster joke.
Who was the first hipster?
You've probably never heard of him.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
MOAR
:gocho:
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How many pages does it take for gE dweebs to make unfunny jokes?
Answer: 13
:lol:
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If that statement is factual, then you're the only gE dweeb in this thread, fanning.
BURN!
-
:Ugh:
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bill clinton
sex
blowjob
a religious lady
now give me 72 tacos cf3
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:ROFL:
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:lol:
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Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b) Stevesie is right this is inaccurate. Hipsters drink black coffee.
What happens when a Hipster falls?
They Tumblr
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Some obscure number you've probably never heard of.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
I dunno guys these hipster jokes are all really the same joke
-
How many pages does it take for gE dweebs to make unfunny jokes?
Answer: 13
:lol:
fanning you really are a nerd sometimes
-
If that statement is factual, then you're the only gE dweeb in this thread, fanning.
BURN!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I dunno guys these hipster jokes are all really the same joke
I know cf3. That's why I stopped at 2.
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bill clinton
sex
blowjob
a religious lady
now give me 72 tacos cf3
:lol:
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how many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
you cant touch the toilet, idiot. its art.
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If that statement is factual, then you're the only gE dweeb in this thread, fanning.
BURN!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Those two tacos probably have tons of hot sauce because of my sick burn tho, right?
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If that statement is factual, then you're the only gE dweeb in this thread, fanning.
BURN!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Those two tacos probably have tons of hot sauce because of my sick burn tho, right?
(https://trello.com/images/gold/hotsauce.png)(https://trello.com/images/gold/hotsauce.png)
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bill clinton
sex
blowjob
a religious lady
now give me 72 tacos cf3
:lol:
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:dubious:
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how many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
you cant touch the toilet, idiot. its art.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What is the internal temperature of a tauntaun?
Luke warm.
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:lol: man fanning just doesnt get "it" guys
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:lol: man fanning just doesnt get "it" guys
I get it, just having fun with my IRL friend, cf3 :)
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
zero is a number
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
thread title. 0 to 5 tacos.
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What is the internal temperature of a tauntaun?
Luke warm.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they are shelfish.
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
zero is a number
Zero is a number, but zero of something is nothing. Proper scale should be 1 to 5 tacos.
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
thread title. 0 to 5 tacos.
I am just trying to make the taco scale legitimate (like MC Hammer too legit to quit level of legit).
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The scale is perfect.
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Kick his ass, blumps!
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The scale is perfect.
If the scale is perfect, why did you give out 72 tacos for the Bill Clinton sexy bj joke when the scale is 0 to 5 tacos? I am just worried about the internal consistency, reliability and validity of your scale CF3. I like tacos and I just want the taco level to reflect something meaningfully funny. I want to know that when I see a three taco rating that it really means three tacos and not reflection of the biases you view the joke with. 5 point Likert scales are tricky you know? I just want your interval level taco scale to reflect a true rating of humor via taco visuals and I worry about the inter joke rating correlations.
I think we owe tacos around the world the respect they deserve.
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BOOM!
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The scale is perfect.
If the scale is perfect, why did you give out 72 tacos for the Bill Clinton sexy bj joke when the scale is 0 to 5 tacos? I am just worried about the internal consistency, reliability and validity of your scale CF3. I like tacos and I just want the taco level to reflect something meaningfully funny. I want to know that when I see a three taco rating that it really means three tacos and not reflection of the biases you view the joke with. 5 point Likert scales are tricky you know? I just want your interval level reflects humor and I worry about the inter joke rating correlations.
KSLIM basically told 20 jokes with those basic punchlines. 72/20=3.6 tacos
3.6 tacos per joke
20 jokes
72 tacos.
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BOOM
also virgins
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great scale CF3
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is the standard 7 point scale from 1-7 or 0-7? gotta be zero-7, right?
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I love the taco scale. I love tacos. I love jokes too so the taco scale is fusing two huge passions of mine. I just saw that the scale contained 0 which is typical of a ratio level scale. However, I noticed the actual taco scale was an interval level (closer to ordinal level) and my hope is to take this thing global with scientifically founded principles based on the psychometric properties of the taco scale.
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is the standard 7 point scale from 1-7 or 0-7? gotta be zero-7, right?
Standard is 1 to 7 unless ratio level. 0 to 7 actually contains 7 intervals: 0 to 1, 1 to 2, 2 to 3, 3 to 4, 4 to 5, 5 to 6 and 6 to 7. The assumption of this type of scale is that each interval is equivalent and zero has a meaning. Take the Celsius scale. 0 degrees Celsius is freezing and has meaning. The interval between 0 to 1 degree Celsius has meaning in that it takes so many Joules of energy to raise anything that 1 degree (varying on the type of matter). The taco scale is more like a ordinal scale similar to NCAA rankings. The distance between intervals is perplexing and 0 means nothing. I am just trying to help take the taco scale to the next level.
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blumpz gonna blump
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If I hear one more thing about my taco scale I am gonna shut this whole thing down and never taco another joke. You'd have to live with that, that you deprived the earth of something so awesome like taco'ing a joke.
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i want 2 tacos (IRL)
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i want 2 tacos (IRL)
Pretty sure Pete's got a no spin thread for you
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i had beef tongue tacos for lunch today
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I had one lengua and two carnitas yesterday. (Taco Tuesday).
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what's brown and sticky?
a stick
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where does a general keep his armies?
in his sleevies
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The concept of zero tacos confuses me. How can you have any tacos (or taco) if there are zero of them? It is just a nebulous concept that is all.
Also, I think Syphilis is a beautiful sounding word if it weren't attached to a horrible sexually transmitted disease.
:th_twocents:
zero is a number
Zero is a number, but zero of something is nothing. Proper scale should be 1 to 5 tacos.
you get zero tacos if your joke sucks. none. zero. you go home taco-less. the world does not owe you a taco.
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CF3, J-Dub, and Wacky all go to a Royals game, on the way home a semi hits them and they die. They all get up to heaven and meet St. Peter at the gates. St. Peter said "Okay everyone can come in, but whatever you do don't step on a duck." The gates open and there are ducks everywhere, all over the floor, on tabletops, everywhere. CF3 walks in and accidentally steps on a duck. St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the ugliest woman in all the world and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed for all eternity." J-Dub and Wacky see this and do their best to avoid the ducks. J-Dub goes months and months without stepping on any duck. Then one morning he wakes up and as he is getting out of bed he steps on two ducks. St. Peter comes over and handcuffs him to the most atrocious looking and smelling woman and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Now Wacky goes years and years and doesn't step on any ducks in all that time. Then one day St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the most beautiful woman he as ever seen. St. Peter says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Wacky happily says, "Oh my God, what have I done to deserve this?!" And the woman says, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."
Also going for some irony tacos here as Wacky is probably a solid 8 IRL.
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Pow!
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topical :lol:
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0 tacos means the joke is not funny at all. How hard is that to understand?
Also, I think it might be a logarithmic scale.
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A pirate walks into a bar.
He has the ship's steering wheel hanging from his pants.
The bartender is puzzled, and says, "Do you know that you have a steering wheel hanging from your pants, Sir?"
The pirate says,........
"ARGH - It's driving me nuts!"
(luked? IDGAF)
-
a baby seal walked into the club
-
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they are shelfish.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
what's brown and sticky?
a stick
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
where does a general keep his armies?
in his sleevies
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
CF3, J-Dub, and Wacky all go to a Royals game, on the way home a semi hits them and they die. They all get up to heaven and meet St. Peter at the gates. St. Peter said "Okay everyone can come in, but whatever you do don't step on a duck." The gates open and there are ducks everywhere, all over the floor, on tabletops, everywhere. CF3 walks in and accidentally steps on a duck. St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the ugliest woman in all the world and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed for all eternity." J-Dub and Wacky see this and do their best to avoid the ducks. J-Dub goes months and months without stepping on any duck. Then one morning he wakes up and as he is getting out of bed he steps on two ducks. St. Peter comes over and handcuffs him to the most atrocious looking and smelling woman and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Now Wacky goes years and years and doesn't step on any ducks in all that time. Then one day St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the most beautiful woman he as ever seen. St. Peter says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Wacky happily says, "Oh my God, what have I done to deserve this?!" And the woman says, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."
Also going for some irony tacos here as Wacky is probably a solid 8 IRL.
You were an Alex Smith zing away from 5 of these bad boys
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A pirate walks into a bar.
He has the ship's steering wheel hanging from his pants.
The bartender is puzzled, and says, "Do you know that you have a steering wheel hanging from your pants, Sir?"
The pirate says,........
"ARGH - It's driving me nuts!"
(luked? IDGAF)
Luked.
a baby seal walked into the club
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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you guys- think of it like cf3 is actually handing out real life honest to goodness tacos. should someone that tells a horrible joke get a free taco? i would say no or else what would keep someone from just telling five horrible jokes every morning and then having a free lunch. nothing would is the answer. you tell a bad joke, you get nothing. nothing.
-
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they are shelfish.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
what's brown and sticky?
a stick
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
where does a general keep his armies?
in his sleevies
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
CF3, J-Dub, and Wacky all go to a Royals game, on the way home a semi hits them and they die. They all get up to heaven and meet St. Peter at the gates. St. Peter said "Okay everyone can come in, but whatever you do don't step on a duck." The gates open and there are ducks everywhere, all over the floor, on tabletops, everywhere. CF3 walks in and accidentally steps on a duck. St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the ugliest woman in all the world and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed for all eternity." J-Dub and Wacky see this and do their best to avoid the ducks. J-Dub goes months and months without stepping on any duck. Then one morning he wakes up and as he is getting out of bed he steps on two ducks. St. Peter comes over and handcuffs him to the most atrocious looking and smelling woman and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Now Wacky goes years and years and doesn't step on any ducks in all that time. Then one day St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the most beautiful woman he as ever seen. St. Peter says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Wacky happily says, "Oh my God, what have I done to deserve this?!" And the woman says, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."
Also going for some irony tacos here as Wacky is probably a solid 8 IRL.
You were an Alex Smith zing away from 5 of these bad boys
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A pirate walks into a bar.
He has the ship's steering wheel hanging from his pants.
The bartender is puzzled, and says, "Do you know that you have a steering wheel hanging from your pants, Sir?"
The pirate says,........
"ARGH - It's driving me nuts!"
(luked? IDGAF)
Luked.
a baby seal walked into the club
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
This confirms my logarithmic scale theory.
The general one was only slightly more funny than my crab joke. But the one about Wacky being ugly was much more funny than the general one.
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Likert scale, blumps? What is this, a research methods course?
-
i think you are probably just grumpy from all this debate and it caused you to under taco my jokes.
-
i think you are probably just grumpy from all this debate and it caused you to under taco my jokes.
I'm the most unbiased Taco'r in the world bro
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i think you are probably just grumpy from all this debate and it caused you to under taco my jokes.
I'm the most unbiased Taco'r in the world bro
sleevies
come on
sleevies
-
CF3, J-Dub, and Wacky all go to a Royals game, on the way home a semi hits them and they die. They all get up to heaven and meet St. Peter at the gates. St. Peter said "Okay everyone can come in, but whatever you do don't step on a duck." The gates open and there are ducks everywhere, all over the floor, on tabletops, everywhere. CF3 walks in and accidentally steps on a duck. St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the ugliest woman in all the world and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed for all eternity." J-Dub and Wacky see this and do their best to avoid the ducks. J-Dub goes months and months without stepping on any duck. Then one morning he wakes up and as he is getting out of bed he steps on two ducks. St. Peter comes over and handcuffs him to the most atrocious looking and smelling woman and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Now Wacky goes years and years and doesn't step on any ducks in all that time. Then one day St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the most beautiful woman he as ever seen. St. Peter says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." Wacky happily says, "Oh my God, what have I done to deserve this?!" And the woman says, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."
Also going for some irony tacos here as Wacky is probably a solid 8 IRL.
:lol: :love:
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BrD7OQDCUAA-gH_.jpg)
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BrD7OQDCUAA-gH_.jpg)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I slept on it and had a dream about zero tacos. It then clicked for me. I wasn't putting faith in the CF3 taco scale, but now I am all in.
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you guys- think of it like cf3 is actually handing out real life honest to goodness tacos. should someone that tells a horrible joke get a free taco? i would say no or else what would keep someone from just telling five horrible jokes every morning and then having a free lunch. nothing would is the answer. you tell a bad joke, you get nothing. nothing.
id be a really full hombre
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Two old Jewish men, Sid and Abe, are sitting in a Mexican restaurant one day.
Sid asks Abe, "Do you know if any people of our ancestry were ever born and raised in Mexico ?"
Abe replies, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter."
When the waiter arrives, Abe asks, "Are there any Mexican Jews?"
The waiter says, "I don't know senor, I ask the cooks.
" He returns from the kitchen after a few minutes and says,
"No senor, the cook say no Mexican Jews."
Abe isn't satisfied and asks, "Are you absolutely sure?"
The waiter, realizing he is dealing with "Gringos" replies,
"I check once again, senor," and goes back into the kitchen.
While the waiter is away, Sid says,
"I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico ..
Our people are scattered everywhere."
The waiter returns and says,
"Senor, the head cook Manuel, he say there is no Mexican Jews."
"Are you certain?" Abe asks again. "I just can't believe there are no Mexican Jews!"
"Senor, I ask EVERYONE," replies the exasperated waiter.
"All we have is Orange Jews, Grape Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews and Apple Jews,
but no Mexican Jews."
-
boooooooooo
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I have a joke to tell CF3 in person, which requires physical presence. I will have him post the tacos here. STAY TUNED!
-
Knock Knock
Who's There?
Dwayne
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub I'm dwowning!!
-
A linguistics professor was lecturing his class. “In English,” he said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian or Spanish, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn’t a single language in which a double positive can express a negative.”
A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
-
Two old Jewish men, Sid and Abe, are sitting in a Mexican restaurant one day.
Sid asks Abe, "Do you know if any people of our ancestry were ever born and raised in Mexico ?"
Abe replies, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter."
When the waiter arrives, Abe asks, "Are there any Mexican Jews?"
The waiter says, "I don't know senor, I ask the cooks.
" He returns from the kitchen after a few minutes and says,
"No senor, the cook say no Mexican Jews."
Abe isn't satisfied and asks, "Are you absolutely sure?"
The waiter, realizing he is dealing with "Gringos" replies,
"I check once again, senor," and goes back into the kitchen.
While the waiter is away, Sid says,
"I find it hard to believe that there are no Jews in Mexico ..
Our people are scattered everywhere."
The waiter returns and says,
"Senor, the head cook Manuel, he say there is no Mexican Jews."
"Are you certain?" Abe asks again. "I just can't believe there are no Mexican Jews!"
"Senor, I ask EVERYONE," replies the exasperated waiter.
"All we have is Orange Jews, Grape Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews and Apple Jews,
but no Mexican Jews."
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Knock Knock
Who's There?
Dwayne
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub I'm dwowning!!
Dwayne the bathtub I'm Dwowning and Orange you glad I didn't say banana are so old man.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
A linguistics professor was lecturing his class. “In English,” he said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian or Spanish, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn’t a single language in which a double positive can express a negative.”
A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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I have a joke to tell CF3 in person, which requires physical presence. I will have him post the tacos here. STAY TUNED!
:Wha:
-
Knock Knock
Who's There?
Dwayne
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub I'm dwowning!!
Dwayne the bathtub I'm Dwowning and Orange you glad I didn't say banana are so old man.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
My grandfather's name is Dwayne and this is probably the first knock-knock joke he ever told me, so it will always be a 5 taco joke to me.
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I have a joke to tell CF3 in person, which requires physical presence. I will have him post the tacos here. STAY TUNED!
:Wha:
False alarm, someone already told it earlier!
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Military guy and his wife have a ton of kids together. Every time he gets a 3-day pass... Boom 39 weeks later they have another baby. Guys in his platoon give him all sorts of grief about this and he is really embarrassed by the number of kids they have. He comes up with a plan and the next time he is home on a 3-day he tells his wife, "the next time you have a baby, just leave word that you had sauerkraut or something like that. All of the guys are really giving me a hard time about all of our kids, so I don't want them to know the next time we have another."
So, 39 weeks later, our military dude comes into the base after a long day of doing whatever military guys do during the day and he has a message from his wife. The message says, "I had sauer kraut kraut kraut. Two with wieners and one without."
Gonna win 'em all!
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Military guy and his wife have a ton of kids together. Every time he gets a 3-day pass... Boom 39 weeks later they have another baby. Guys in his platoon give him all sorts of grief about this and he is really embarrassed by the number of kids they have. He comes up with a plan and the next time he is home on a 3-day he tells his wife, "the next time you have a baby, just leave word that you had sauerkraut or something like that. All of the guys are really giving me a hard time about all of our kids, so I don't want them to know the next time we have another."
So, 39 weeks later, our military dude comes into the base after a long day of doing whatever military guys do during the day and he has a message from his wife. The message says, "I had sauer kraut kraut kraut. Two with wieners and one without."
Gonna win 'em all!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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If you would have heard my mom tell that joke you would have given it 5 tacos. It was Momdobber's "go to " back in the day.
Gonna win 'em all!
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The delivery really is a lost element when taco'ing blogged jokes dobber. We're all working within the limitations we're given unfortunately
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The delivery really is a lost element when taco'ing blogged jokes dobber. We're all working within the limitations we're given unfortunately
did you see the hellhammer thread? pretty great delivery that would not be appreciated at all in straight text bbsn' form
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I'll check it out seven thanks for the tip
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I'll check it out seven thanks for the tip
make sure the little ones are in bed before you open that thread
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seven there's no way that was five taco worthy
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seven there's no way that was five taco worthy
ya, prolly 4, but i really laughed and smiled at it so benefit of the doubt 5 man, you know how it is
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that's the thing about taco'ing a joke. Its all about if it makes YOU laugh.
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The programmer's wife tells him... "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
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The programmer's wife tells him... "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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The programmer's wife tells him... "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Oh come on....
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I'd have to reread all of gE to be certain, but this seems like nepotism. That rough ridin' kraut kraut kraut joke kills every damn time and if got like 1 or 2 tacos. Bullshit.
Gonna win 'em all!
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slobber I reread that joke 3 times trying to see why it was even considered a joke. 1+ tacos is generous.
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The programmer's wife tells him... "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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The programmer's wife tells him... "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."
The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
that's good
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slobber I reread that joke 3 times trying to see why it was even considered a joke. 1+ tacos is generous.
Well you're considered a real funny joke. 5 tacos.
Gonna win 'em all!
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why is he a programmer?
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Last time I checked the thread is called "CF3 judges your jokes on a scale of 0 to 5 tacos" not "CF3 judges your jokes on a scale of 0 to 5 tacos and then everyone complains about how many tacos their mediocre washed up old jokes got like a bunch of stupid babies"
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A little boy sees his grandpa smoking a cigar on the porch and asks for a puff. Grandpa says, "Son, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and the little boy says "no". Grandpa replies, "Well, then you're not old enough to puff a cigar".
A couple days later the little boy sees his grandpa drinking a beer on the porch and asks for a sip. Grandpa says, "Son, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and the little boy says "no". Grandpa replies, "Well, then you're not old enough to drink beer".
The next day, the little boy is sitting on the porch with a plateful of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies that grandma made when grandpa sits down and asks for a cookie. The little boy says, "Grandpa, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and grandpa says proudly, "As a matter of fact, I can!"
The little boy says, "In that case, you can go eff yourself. Grandma made these cookies for me!"
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A little boy sees his grandpa smoking a cigar on the porch and asks for a puff. Grandpa says, "Son, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and the little boy says "no". Grandpa replies, "Well, then you're not old enough to puff a cigar".
A couple days later the little boy sees his grandpa drinking a beer on the porch and asks for a sip. Grandpa says, "Son, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and the little boy says "no". Grandpa replies, "Well, then you're not old enough to drink beer".
The next day, the little boy is sitting on the porch with a plateful of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies that grandma made when grandpa sits down and asks for a cookie. The little boy says, "Grandpa, can you touch your bad person with your pecker?" and grandpa says proudly, "As a matter of fact, I can!"
The little boy says, "In that case, you can go eff yourself. Grandma made these cookies for me!"
That guy is a horrible grandpa
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
IMHO, this deserved way more than one taco. So did the H2O2 joke.
**************
So I run into this guy at a bar who tell me he has a talking dog. Like, actually speaks Engligh. Of course I don't believe him, but he says the dog is tied up outside, so we go out to see the dog.
"Ask my dog anything you want, you'll see," the guy says. Rolling my eyes, I ask his dog: "What's on top of a house?"
"Roof!" says the dog.
Hey that's amazing!! But I still have a little bit of doubt, so I ask the dog: "Where do golfers want to avoid hitting the ball?"
"Rough!" says the dog.
BOOOM! Mind. Blown. "Alright," I say to the guy, "I believe you, I've just got to ask one more question because this is amazing!" So I ask the dog: "What's a good tourist spot in San Fransisco?"
"Wharf!" says the dog, "Fisherman's Wharf."
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
IMHO, this deserved way more than one taco. So did the H2O2 joke.
If one more person complains about how many tacos I taco a joke I will never taco again. Get over it. I taco the way I want to taco.
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
IMHO, this deserved way more than one taco. So did the H2O2 joke.
**************
So I run into this guy at a bar who tell me he has a talking dog. Like, actually speaks Engligh. Of course I don't believe him, but he says the dog is tied up outside, so we go out to see the dog.
"Ask my dog anything you want, you'll see," the guy says. Rolling my eyes, I ask his dog: "What's on top of a house?"
"Roof!" says the dog.
Hey that's amazing!! But I still have a little bit of doubt, so I ask the dog: "Where do golfers want to avoid hitting the ball?"
"Rough!" says the dog.
BOOOM! Mind. Blown. "Alright," I say to the guy, "I believe you, I've just got to ask one more question because this is amazing!" So I ask the dog: "What's a good tourist spot in San Fransisco?"
"Wharf!" says the dog, "Fisherman's Wharf."
so old
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
IMHO, this deserved way more than one taco. So did the H2O2 joke.
**************
So I run into this guy at a bar who tell me he has a talking dog. Like, actually speaks Engligh. Of course I don't believe him, but he says the dog is tied up outside, so we go out to see the dog.
"Ask my dog anything you want, you'll see," the guy says. Rolling my eyes, I ask his dog: "What's on top of a house?"
"Roof!" says the dog.
Hey that's amazing!! But I still have a little bit of doubt, so I ask the dog: "Where do golfers want to avoid hitting the ball?"
"Rough!" says the dog.
BOOOM! Mind. Blown. "Alright," I say to the guy, "I believe you, I've just got to ask one more question because this is amazing!" So I ask the dog: "What's a good tourist spot in San Fransisco?"
"Wharf!" says the dog, "Fisherman's Wharf."
so old
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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Roman soldier walks in a bar and says I'll have a martinus. Bartender says "a martini?" Soldier says if I wanted more than one I would have said so. Little while later another soldier walks in, holds up two fingers, and says I'll have five beers.
IMHO, this deserved way more than one taco. So did the H2O2 joke.
If one more person complains about how many tacos I taco a joke I will never taco again. Get over it. I taco the way I want to taco.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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What does the man in the moon do when his hair gets too long?
Eclipse it!
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What does the man in the moon do when his hair gets too long?
Eclipse it!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
:thumbs:
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
trust the process mocat
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
trust the process mocat
yeah i guess i should give you the bonifacio of the doubt here
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
trust the process mocat
yeah i guess i should give you the bonifacio of the doubt here
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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in a way, it feels like i earned 5 tacos with that joke
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in a way, it feels like i earned 5 tacos with that joke
Rule 1: Know your audience.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
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cartier, i know your taco'ing is based off a complicated algorithmic formula matrices, but i was wondering if you could provide some insight on if topicality plays a part?
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in a way, it feels like i earned 5 tacos with that joke
Rule 1: Know your audience.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
ya know? i dont think 72 tacos is ever going to be beat...and im okay with that
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
It took me unusually long to get this joke the first time. I actually walked into the bathroom, looked at myself in the mirror, held up 2 fingers and said, "I'll have 5 beers." Then I :lol:
Definitely a joke that's easier to grasp face-to-face
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CF3, maybe you didn't get the part where the Roman soldier held up TWO fingers and asked for FIVE beers. ROMAN NUMERAL FIVE!
It took me unusually long to get this joke the first time. I actually walked into the bathroom, looked at myself in the mirror, held up 2 fingers and said, "I'll have 5 beers." Then I :lol:
Definitely a joke that's easier to grasp face-to-face
That God for symmetry.
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cartier, i know your taco'ing is based off a complicated algorithmic formula matrices, but i was wondering if you could provide some insight on if topicality plays a part?
It absolutely does Tonya. It factors up to and including about 31.1% of the eventual taco outcome
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cartier, i know your taco'ing is based off a complicated algorithmic formula matrices, but i was wondering if you could provide some insight on if topicality plays a part?
It absolutely does Tonya. It factors up to and including about 31.1% of the eventual taco outcome
ah, the metric system. you sneaky bastard!
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4 nuns die in a car crash (because they had just went through Taco Bell drive thru and the driver was an uncoordinated nub fan and couldn't drive and eat tacos at the same time). They go up to heaven and St. Peter meets them at the pearly gates. The first nun steps up to St. Peter and he says, "Tell me the worst thing you have ever done and that will determine whether or not you can enter the gates of heaven." She says, "Oh St. Peter, I once did a very horrible thing. I once touched a man's penis with this finger. I beg for forgiveness." St. Peter says, "my child, your acknowledgement of such a horrible act is penance enough. Simply wash your finger in this fountain of holy water and enter the gates of heaven."
The second nun steps up to St Peter and he says, "Tell me the worst thing you have ever done and that will determine whether or not you can enter the gates of heaven." She says, "Oh St. Peter, I once did a very horrible thing. I once grabbed a man's penis with this hand. I beg for forgiveness." St. Peter says, "my child, your acknowledgement of such a horrible act is penance enough. Simply wash your hand in this fountain of holy water and enter the gates of heaven."
At that moment St. Peter sees the 4th nun cut in front of the third nun and hurriedly approach him at the entrance gates. St. Peter inquires, "My Sister, why the rudeness with your Sister?"
The 4th nun replies, "St Peter, I am terribly sorry, but I don't want to have to gargle with what she is going to have to sit in."
Gonna win 'em all!
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Omg!
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Omg!
I know , right?!
...:waiting:
Gonna win 'em all!
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Omg!
I know , right?!
...:waiting:
Gonna win 'em all!
I'm guessing 3. That CF3 is a fickle fella.
(Also in that honest opinion thread from couple months ago, I got you confused with stunted. He was the dude that had been to Asia)
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Omg!
I know , right?!
...:waiting:
Gonna win 'em all!
I'm guessing 3. That CF3 is a fickle fella.
(Also in that honest opinion thread from couple months ago, I got you confused with stunted. He was the dude that had been to Asia)
the addition of the Taco Bell drive thru will get me 4.
I don't remember the Asia reference.
Gonna win 'em all!
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Omg!
I know , right?!
...:waiting:
Gonna win 'em all!
I'm guessing 3. That CF3 is a fickle fella.
(Also in that honest opinion thread from couple months ago, I got you confused with stunted. He was the dude that had been to Asia)
the addition of the Taco Bell drive thru will get me 4.
I don't remember the Asia reference.
Gonna win 'em all!
http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=32191.msg1121507.msg#1121507 (http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=32191.msg1121507.msg#1121507)
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4 nuns die in a car crash (because they had just went through Taco Bell drive thru and the driver was an uncoordinated nub fan and couldn't drive and eat tacos at the same time). They go up to heaven and St. Peter meets them at the pearly gates. The first nun steps up to St. Peter and he says, "Tell me the worst thing you have ever done and that will determine whether or not you can enter the gates of heaven." She says, "Oh St. Peter, I once did a very horrible thing. I once touched a man's penis with this finger. I beg for forgiveness." St. Peter says, "my child, your acknowledgement of such a horrible act is penance enough. Simply wash your finger in this fountain of holy water and enter the gates of heaven."
The second nun steps up to St Peter and he says, "Tell me the worst thing you have ever done and that will determine whether or not you can enter the gates of heaven." She says, "Oh St. Peter, I once did a very horrible thing. I once grabbed a man's penis with this hand. I beg for forgiveness." St. Peter says, "my child, your acknowledgement of such a horrible act is penance enough. Simply wash your hand in this fountain of holy water and enter the gates of heaven."
At that moment St. Peter sees the 4th nun cut in front of the third nun and hurriedly approach him at the entrance gates. St. Peter inquires, "My Sister, why the rudeness with your Sister?"
The 4th nun replies, "St Peter, I am terribly sorry, but I don't want to have to gargle with what she is going to have to sit in."
Gonna win 'em all!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.f2bb.com%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2Ftaco.gif&hash=0a4d8439c2cbd614ad21add23b9689bf36095b0b)
Its a 3 taco joke, with a T-Bell and nub fan thrown in. Good work dobs
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Ah yes, "tales of love in Asia..." Thanks for reminding me. I :lol: again!
Gonna win 'em all!
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:pride:
:blush:
Gonna win 'em all!
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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles
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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles
What about a squid?
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How much does a hipster weigh?
A instagram!
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A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."
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Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist? He got off on a technicality.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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A guy is sitting at a bar alone and he hears some whispers "Nice shirt." "I like your haircut." "You have nice eyes."
He looks all around and there is no one around him. A minute later the bartender walks over so the guy says, "Do you hear those whispers?"
The bartender says, "It's the nuts. They're complimentary."
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A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!”
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A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!”
I like this one
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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles
I started counting in my head for some dumb reason.
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Theres this guy hosting a big costume party in his swanky uptown apartment one evening when he notices one of his guests has arrived wearing nothing but a pair of blue jeans. The host walks up to the man to inquire what the guest is supposed to be.
"Oh, i'm a premature ejaculation." Replies the guest.
Puzzled, the man probes further "Huh, well then why did you arrive not wearing a shirt or even any shoes, for God's sake?"
"I just came in my pants."
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What the fundamental difference between the American Chemical Society and the Teamsters?
How they pronounce "unionized"
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knock knock
who's there
to
to who
no, to whom
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Haha to both
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BeG7SWwCEAAwx-O.jpg:large)
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BeG7SWwCEAAwx-O.jpg:large)
:lol:
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All that bacteria in that pond, algae, protists.... brave women....
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Someone should probably type in Matt Ryan's dad joke from Hard Knocks Ep 3 for a CF3 review :notit:
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Someone should probably type in Matt Ryan's dad joke from Hard Knocks Ep 3 for a CF3 review :notit:
:buh-bye:
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I will taco these today fellas
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Do I know any jokes about Sodium? Na.
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Do I know any jokes about Sodium? Na.
I think we already laughed our asses off to this one in the Sciency Pictures thread??
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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
i feel like there should be more to that joke
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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Yes? Go on...
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I will taco these today fellas
Liar! Mods need to shame themselves immediately.
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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
:D
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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
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How much does a hipster weigh?
A instagram!
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist? He got off on a technicality.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
A guy is sitting at a bar alone and he hears some whispers "Nice shirt." "I like your haircut." "You have nice eyes."
He looks all around and there is no one around him. A minute later the bartender walks over so the guy says, "Do you hear those whispers?"
The bartender says, "It's the nuts. They're complimentary."
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
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I can't find my other taco clip art. Dead link. :frown:
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A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!”
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
Theres this guy hosting a big costume party in his swanky uptown apartment one evening when he notices one of his guests has arrived wearing nothing but a pair of blue jeans. The host walks up to the man to inquire what the guest is supposed to be.
"Oh, i'm a premature ejaculation." Replies the guest.
Puzzled, the man probes further "Huh, well then why did you arrive not wearing a shirt or even any shoes, for God's sake?"
"I just came in my pants."
Gross.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
What the fundamental difference between the American Chemical Society and the Teamsters?
How they pronounce "unionized"
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
knock knock
who's there
to
to who
no, to whom
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BeG7SWwCEAAwx-O.jpg:large)
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
I will taco these today fellas
Liar! Mods need to shame themselves immediately.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
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Theres this guy hosting a big costume party in his swanky uptown apartment one evening when he notices one of his guests has arrived wearing nothing but a pair of blue jeans. The host walks up to the man to inquire what the guest is supposed to be.
"Oh, i'm a premature ejaculation." Replies the guest.
Puzzled, the man probes further "Huh, well then why did you arrive not wearing a shirt or even any shoes, for God's sake?"
"I just came in my pants."
Gross.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
i.e - he just showed up wearing pants, double entendre, oh nevermind
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Theres this guy hosting a big costume party in his swanky uptown apartment one evening when he notices one of his guests has arrived wearing nothing but a pair of blue jeans. The host walks up to the man to inquire what the guest is supposed to be.
"Oh, i'm a premature ejaculation." Replies the guest.
Puzzled, the man probes further "Huh, well then why did you arrive not wearing a shirt or even any shoes, for God's sake?"
"I just came in my pants."
Gross.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt)
i.e - he just showed up wearing pants, double entendre, oh nevermind
I liked it but oh lawd good god don't question the tacos!
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guy posts a photo of 3 teenage girls with no clothes on, and cartier gives him 4 tacos. unconscionable
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i cant see the tacos, this saddens me
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guy posts a photo of 3 teenage girls with no clothes on, and cartier gives him 4 tacos. unconscionable
mocat I'm off my BBS game all around.
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i cant see the tacos, this saddens me
https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt
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i cant see the tacos, this saddens me
https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTD_lv7jQa7MLF57EXeeQ-frUDPMYNu3F-X99VoCjcW1OXDOYVt
as current record holder of 72 tacos ill allow this link
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Herr's was 4, bp's email forward was a 1
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Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar… followed by Batman.
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Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?… He’s 0K now.
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Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?… He’s 0K now.
:D
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A photon checks into a hotel and the bellhop asks him if he has any luggage…. The photon replies, “No, I’m traveling light.”
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eff jokes that make you think Mrs. Gooch :dubious:
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There are two types of people in this world:… Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
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Pavlov is sitting at a bar, when all of the sudden the phone rings… Pavlov gasps, “Oh crap, I forgot to feed the dogs.”
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Pavlov is sitting at a bar, when all of the sudden the phone rings… Pavlov gasps, “Oh crap, I forgot to feed the dogs.”
oh wow
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An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on. … After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, “You fellas ought to know your limits.”
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mrs gooch is good at jokes
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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really enjoying these math jokes :D
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Yo mamma is so fat, the probability of her being an arbitrary point in a room is 1.
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Your momma is so mean… she has no standard deviation.
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Your momma is so mean… she has no standard deviation.
Average, at best.
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mrs gooch, what's the integral of 1/cabin?
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mrs gooch, what's the integral of 1/cabin?
?1/(cabin) = log cabin + c = houseboat
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FINE RUIN MY JOKE YOU JERK
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FINE RUIN MY JOKE YOU JERK
oops. Sorry.
Here's a pic for you.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Facidcow.com%2Fpics%2F20120817%2Fjokes_03.jpg&hash=120b8711fed4002e543c9b41467ac0cdc56ee793)
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Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?… He’s 0K now.
Did you hear about the guy who had his entire left side ripped off by an alligator? He's alright now.
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Who hacked Mrs. Gooch's acct? She is nowhere this funny in real life.
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Who hacked Mrs. Gooch's acct? She is nowhere this funny in real life.
Google makes us all experts and comedians.
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Who hacked Mrs. Gooch's acct? She is nowhere this funny in real life.
She is less funny than calculus jokes? T&Ps Gooch
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Yo mamma is so fat, the probability of her being an arbitrary point in a room is 1.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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what's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
i wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face
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I mean, how long do I have to wait for my tacos?
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CF3 starts a thread were he tacos jokes. That's it guys that's the joke :lol:
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What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
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(https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10413313_10152715710787744_5627673578685732248_n.jpg?oh=63df1f310fa589d825ac17e821ed40cc&oe=54D03BB6&__gda__=1422339273_8fa498e942845426feebbe4c01cef286)
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Mrs. Gooch, sorry for not taco'ing jokes earlier. They are all v good and get a composite score of:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fec.l.thumbs.canstockphoto.com%2Fcanstock2446701.jpg&hash=d7e851f3d8c53b2c0e6dc4712d4174af6a03f2dd)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fec.l.thumbs.canstockphoto.com%2Fcanstock2446701.jpg&hash=d7e851f3d8c53b2c0e6dc4712d4174af6a03f2dd)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fec.l.thumbs.canstockphoto.com%2Fcanstock2446701.jpg&hash=d7e851f3d8c53b2c0e6dc4712d4174af6a03f2dd)(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fec.l.thumbs.canstockphoto.com%2Fcanstock2446701.jpg&hash=d7e851f3d8c53b2c0e6dc4712d4174af6a03f2dd)
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rapid fire you guys, get ready
I’m reading a great book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
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Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations?
Because they don’t believe in higher powers.
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A group of protesters in front of a physics lab:
“What do we want?”.
“Time travel”
“When do we want it?”.
“Irrelevant.”
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What does a subatomic duck say?
Quark!
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A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer. Bartender replies “For you, no charge”. :D
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Two atoms are walking along. One of them says:
“Oh, no, I think I lost an electron.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m positive.”
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the big train theory
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not sure if those jokes were luked by dr bolton or in this thread
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What's the best part of a bulimic's birthday party?
When the cake pops out of the girl.
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SPECIAL OU GAME JOKE:
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Pretty
Pretty Who?
Pretty much everyone except for Austin Box and that kid who blew himself up
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true story alert: i played baseball against austin box one time in oklahoma.
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what if he had used bill clinton voice?
negative 2 tacos. Bill Clinton is horny, George W Bush is stupid, etc are the lowest hanging fruit in humor. Presidential jokes are lame. They are Jay Leno material.
I guess, then, that it wouldn't be prudent for me to share my H.W. Bush sidesplitter...
Cartier didnt understand that my question WAS the fuckin joke :lol:
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What did the Nuclear Physicist have for lunch?
Fission Chips.
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I'll give you the punch line and you tell the joke. Here goes it:
AND IF THERE'S A NOODLE IN THERE, I'M NOT PAYING FOR IT EITHER!!!
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Have I told you guys my Noah's ark joke?
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What did the Nuclear Physicist have for lunch?
Fission Chips.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fd2po17o2y4vue7.cloudfront.net%2Fuploads%2Fmenu_item%2Fimage%2F3%2Fnav_TACOS.png&hash=1079d16ca5f785be8556f22c04e6c04958564d33)
I'll give you the punch line and you tell the joke. Here goes it:
AND IF THERE'S A NOODLE IN THERE, I'M NOT PAYING FOR IT EITHER!!!
I don't get it. No Tacos.
Have I told you guys my Noah's ark joke?
go ahead.
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Oh what the eff cf3
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Oh what the eff cf3
sorry man. I go with "gut"
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why can't you trust atoms?
they make up everything. :adored:
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No eff you tbt your joke sucks and so does science
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so a moth walks into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist says, “what seems to be the problem?”
the moth says “what’s the problem? where do I begin, man? I go to work for gregory illinivich, and all day long I work. honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if gregory illinivich knows. he only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. but I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to this old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. a lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. my youngest, alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. and my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. my other boy, gregarro ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. as much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. if only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good.
and so the doctor says, “moth, man, you’re troubled. you need help. but you should be seeing a psychiatrist. why on earth did you come here?”
moth says, “because the light was on.”
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No eff you tbt your joke sucks and so does science
i just have an (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.quia.com%2Ffiles%2Fquia%2Fusers%2Fpetetm%2Facute-angle&hash=21ca4ff4105770d7beadfd5f494dfefef5f4edd2) understanding of science
you are just (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theworkofgodschildren.org%2Fcollaboration%2Fimages%2F4%2F4a%2FObtuse_Angle_%28PSF%29.png&hash=f5b320e01c9500a953c753f33c92308cb76d5ea4)
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No eff you tbt your joke sucks and so does science
i just have an (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.quia.com%2Ffiles%2Fquia%2Fusers%2Fpetetm%2Facute-angle&hash=21ca4ff4105770d7beadfd5f494dfefef5f4edd2) understanding of science
you are just (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theworkofgodschildren.org%2Fcollaboration%2Fimages%2F4%2F4a%2FObtuse_Angle_%28PSF%29.png&hash=f5b320e01c9500a953c753f33c92308cb76d5ea4)
Translation
Top pic = acute
Bottom pic= obtuse
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fblawgit.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F08%2Ftaco1.png&hash=bad23b69eda64fda42a5c8fb5bd0d2f467cc51f5)
why can't you trust atoms?
they make up everything. :adored:
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.grubgrade.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F07%2FCantina-Tacos-from-Taco-Bell.jpg&hash=374c17ed6863a336dd87eb27cbde8db3e5d0f299)
No eff you tbt your joke sucks and so does science
i just have an (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.quia.com%2Ffiles%2Fquia%2Fusers%2Fpetetm%2Facute-angle&hash=21ca4ff4105770d7beadfd5f494dfefef5f4edd2) understanding of science
you are just (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theworkofgodschildren.org%2Fcollaboration%2Fimages%2F4%2F4a%2FObtuse_Angle_%28PSF%29.png&hash=f5b320e01c9500a953c753f33c92308cb76d5ea4)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fintrinsicalgorithm.com%2FIAonAI%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F11%2F6a00d8341c5e0053ef016302a5b7f5970d-800wi.png&hash=214a6d551c742be1897f125dee11797b736d8664)
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i made this one up for you, cf3.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yn38I0Y-zqg&feature=youtu.be&t=19 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yn38I0Y-zqg&feature=youtu.be&t=19)
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i made this one up for you, cf3.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yn38I0Y-zqg&feature=youtu.be&t=19 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yn38I0Y-zqg&feature=youtu.be&t=19)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcharlotterestauranttraffic-flywheel.netdna-ssl.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F02%2Ftaco-bell-tacos-4.png&hash=0307c1b2ccbf26169fdaecf2eedfc241a3b94d83)
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This joke is much better in person but here goes.
So the flood is here and everyone is on board the ark. There's not much to do so the animals are just having sex like crazy and the females are fed up with it. They go to Noah and say enough is enough we need to do something about this. So Noah issues a sex card to each male animal that can be used once a day. This was acceptable to the females. Well the male monkey comes home drunk one day and says in a drunk voice "Female monkey you are so screwed." She looks at him confused and he repeats "female monkey you are sooooo screwed." She asks why and the male monkey says "I was playing cards with the guys and lost my sex card to the donkey."
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It's really hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac because they're always taking things literally.
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This joke is much better in person but here goes.
So the flood is here and everyone is on board the ark. There's not much to do so the animals are just having sex like crazy and the females are fed up with it. They go to Noah and say enough is enough we need to do something about this. So Noah issues a sex card to each male animal that can be used once a day. This was acceptable to the females. Well the male monkey comes home drunk one day and says in a drunk voice "Female monkey you are so screwed." She looks at him confused and he repeats "female monkey you are sooooo screwed." She asks why and the male monkey says "I was playing cards with the guys and lost my sex card to the donkey."
why is it better in person?
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how does the monkey come home drunk if he is already on the ark?
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This joke is much better in person but here goes.
So the flood is here and everyone is on board the ark. There's not much to do so the animals are just having sex like crazy and the females are fed up with it. They go to Noah and say enough is enough we need to do something about this. So Noah issues a sex card to each male animal that can be used once a day. This was acceptable to the females. Well the male monkey comes home drunk one day and says in a drunk voice "Female monkey you are so screwed." She looks at him confused and he repeats "female monkey you are sooooo screwed." She asks why and the male monkey says "I was playing cards with the guys and lost my sex card to the donkey."
why is it better in person?
I act out the male monkey part. Usually I hang one arm from a doorway and swing like a drunk monkey.
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Man I sure Ok Cat'd things up with my joke at the top of this page. Don't care, still proud of it.
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how does the monkey come home drunk if he is already on the ark?
I don't know use your imagination. I like to think of the ark as a cruise ship and there's a bar onboard.
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This joke is much better in person but here goes.
So the flood is here and everyone is on board the ark. There's not much to do so the animals are just having sex like crazy and the females are fed up with it. They go to Noah and say enough is enough we need to do something about this. So Noah issues a sex card to each male animal that can be used once a day. This was acceptable to the females. Well the male monkey comes home drunk one day and says in a drunk voice "Female monkey you are so screwed." She looks at him confused and he repeats "female monkey you are sooooo screwed." She asks why and the male monkey says "I was playing cards with the guys and lost my sex card to the donkey."
why is it better in person?
I act out the male monkey part. Usually I hang one arm from a doorway and swing like a drunk monkey.
laughed harder at this than your joke fwiw.
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That's nice.
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This joke is much better in person but here goes.
So the flood is here and everyone is on board the ark. There's not much to do so the animals are just having sex like crazy and the females are fed up with it. They go to Noah and say enough is enough we need to do something about this. So Noah issues a sex card to each male animal that can be used once a day. This was acceptable to the females. Well the male monkey comes home drunk one day and says in a drunk voice "Female monkey you are so screwed." She looks at him confused and he repeats "female monkey you are sooooo screwed." She asks why and the male monkey says "I was playing cards with the guys and lost my sex card to the donkey."
Gross.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs3.amazonaws.com%2Fhungry-girl%2Fuploads%2Frecipes%2F1429%2FiHungry_Spaghetti_Tacos_LRG.jpg&hash=132e0955a7a61e760567373c4f9697877799b0fd)
It's really hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac because they're always taking things literally.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F-S1vPULMdcko%2FT9Dux8HGMII%2FAAAAAAAAEvI%2FU6HnuxguYOw%2Fs1600%2Fslow%2Bcooker%2Bchicken%2Btacos.jpg&hash=8eba89c41a2d5644f5b067e9dab773e5da24dcaf)
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I'll give you the punch line and you tell the joke. Here goes it:
AND IF THERE'S A NOODLE IN THERE, I'M NOT PAYING FOR IT EITHER!!!
welp, since none of you guys care to take a stab at this I'll let you in on what you're missing.
Man walks into a café and asks for noodle soup. When he gets his soup, he complains that there's a hair in the soup and he's not paying for it. He leaves the café and walks into a whore house. The waitress follows this particular man in and see's his head buried in muff. She says "You son-of-a-bitch, you wouldn't pay for the soup because a hair was floating in it. Now look at you!!!". That's when he pulls his head out and says...
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Made taco burgers the other night.
Took leftover meat and threw it on top of lettuce with toms, onions and cheese with some taco sauce and Dorothy Lynch (nectar of the gods).
I wish I had a picture. It was delicious!
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It's really hard to explain puns to a kleptomaniac because they're always taking things literally.
Pretty sure lib7 made that joke back on page 1ish. I do not recall the number of tacos received nor do I care to look it up
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no i didn't and don't insult me like that
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:impatient:
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Made taco burgers the other night.
Took leftover meat and threw it on top of lettuce with toms, onions and cheese with some taco sauce and Dorothy Lynch (nectar of the gods).
I wish I had a picture. It was delicious!
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fafrisounds.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F01%2F1-Kanye-West_12-30-20131.jpg&hash=7a683adb3df6b9150212d6f3fffee20a73d658e8)
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no i didn't and don't insult me like that
My apologies it was ksupamplegrapefruit
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I'll give you the punch line and you tell the joke. Here goes it:
AND IF THERE'S A NOODLE IN THERE, I'M NOT PAYING FOR IT EITHER!!!
welp, since none of you guys care to take a stab at this I'll let you in on what you're missing.
Man walks into a café and asks for noodle soup. When he gets his soup, he complains that there's a hair in the soup and he's not paying for it. He leaves the café and walks into a whore house. The waitress follows this particular man in and see's his head buried in muff. She says "You son-of-a-bitch, you wouldn't pay for the soup because a hair was floating in it. Now look at you!!!". That's when he pulls his head out and says...
Gross
(https://usatftw.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/taco.jpg?w=635)
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I'll give you the punch line and you tell the joke. Here goes it:
AND IF THERE'S A NOODLE IN THERE, I'M NOT PAYING FOR IT EITHER!!!
welp, since none of you guys care to take a stab at this I'll let you in on what you're missing.
Man walks into a café and asks for noodle soup. When he gets his soup, he complains that there's a hair in the soup and he's not paying for it. He leaves the café and walks into a whore house. The waitress follows this particular man in and see's his head buried in muff. She says "You son-of-a-bitch, you wouldn't pay for the soup because a hair was floating in it. Now look at you!!!". That's when he pulls his head out and says...
Gross
(https://usatftw.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/taco.jpg?w=635)
It's funny, due to the real factor. By the way, ever went down on a new "girl friend" and wonder what you might find. :fatty:
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Katdaddy, seriously, no.
Gonna win 'em all!
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
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lol
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
Dang two supreme tacos and two regs, really hit this one out of the park
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
Dang two supreme tacos and two regs, really hit this one out of the park
This sucks! At least mine had noodles.
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
Dang two supreme tacos and two regs, really hit this one out of the park
This sucks! At least mine had noodles.
Katdaddy, its obvious that CF3 likes animal puns.
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
Dang two supreme tacos and two regs, really hit this one out of the park
This sucks! At least mine had noodles.
Katdaddy, its obvious that CF3 likes animal puns.
So you think he may be using a cat and dog recipe for those homemade tacos?
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A man walks into a zoo
The only animal in the zoo is a dog
It's a shih tzu
I like it.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn2-b.examiner.com%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fstyles%2Fimage_content_width%2Fhash%2Fff%2F23%2Fff23fd459952e4b6b481a0bbd85b9180.jpg%3Fitok%3D3vmlxbqO&hash=f3b16597139d6bbec60110835d6d33d66cd2134c)
Dang two supreme tacos and two regs, really hit this one out of the park
This sucks! At least mine had noodles.
Katdaddy, its obvious that CF3 likes animal puns.
So you think he may be using a cat and dog recipe for those homemade tacos?
One can only assume
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CF3 I keep forgetting to tell you, I saw a guy in this shirt at a Phish concert last summer and I took this picture for you.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCTkXyOk.jpg&hash=4ca9caac05e3e70c068fa22522b8b26b841a9b18)
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That guy thinks highly of himself.
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Why did the banana go to the doctor?
He wasn't peeling well.
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Why did the banana go to the doctor?
He wasn't peeling well.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCTkXyOk.jpg&hash=4ca9caac05e3e70c068fa22522b8b26b841a9b18)
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(https://culturallydisoriented.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/tumblr_mt7dooi67b1qci1soo1_500.gif)
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(https://culturallydisoriented.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/tumblr_mt7dooi67b1qci1soo2_500.gif)
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CF3 I keep forgetting to tell you, I saw a guy in this shirt at a Phish concert last summer and I took this picture for you.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCTkXyOk.jpg&hash=4ca9caac05e3e70c068fa22522b8b26b841a9b18)
:excited:
(https://culturallydisoriented.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/tumblr_mt7dooi67b1qci1soo1_500.gif)
(https://culturallydisoriented.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/tumblr_mt7dooi67b1qci1soo2_500.gif)
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tablehopper.com%2Fregular%2Fassets_c%2F2010%2F04%2F3-tacos-thumb-300xauto-863.jpg&hash=2bfa958801038aa01958be938411387c440cd76d)