Here's a clue for you hayseed kc transplants:
1) it's a honkie ass cow town
2) waldo sucks
3) downtown is a train wreck
4) everywhere in missouri not called ward parkway or the plaza rough ridin' sucks
5) wyandotte county is gross
6) the airport is in iowa
7) you can get a really cool house for cheap but you have to paint it brown
8) joco has some of the best public schools in the world
9) awesome place to raise a family