Re kids: having a pool and gym close by is a big plus.
If you don't get at least a 3 car garage, I will never be your friend (because the SD I think I know deserves at least a 3 car garage.
I would probably get a north or south facing house. Direct sun in the backyard at night renders that awesome deck useless in the summer until about 10:00 pm.
Tell the builder you don't want fill dirt for the top 6 inches of your yard and landscape area. I know you don't do that work, but I am guessing you want it to look awesome. Put in good soil and you won't regret it.
Also, don't let them pour a drive way that narrows to a single entry at the street.
Hardie plank siding or brick is the way to go.
Extra wide main door frame to allow for double doors or a kickass single door with awesome effects on the side.
Don't buy or build a house that the stairs going up are the first thing you see when you walk in the front door, unless the are back from the door at least 12 feet.
Real estate can't be too expensive where you live. If you are going to raise kids at this house, get 1/2 acre or more (22,000 sq ft) for a lot.
Cul-de-sac or gtfo. (Ok, at least not a through street with the future potential of having heavy traffic.
Gonna win 'em all!