Master Dating Thread

[Trim]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

[slobber]

Yes, be specific. Tell her you will drive her to Chanute, KS.


Gonna win 'em all! (using Tapatalk)

[catastrophe]

Yes, be specific. Tell her you will drive her to Chanute, KS.


Gonna win 'em all! (using Tapatalk)

http://www.chanute.com/news/article_ff00c202-1967-11e6-ba66-c38826f70c72.html

[pvegs]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

I'll let Latrice know that. She seemed pretty drunk via text last night. Like I could hardly focus on watching Better Call Saul and parse her messages at the same time kind of deal.

[Trim]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

I'll let Latrice know that. She seemed pretty drunk via text last night. Like I could hardly focus on watching Better Call Saul and parse her messages at the same time kind of deal.

You can tell her while you're happily parasailing over scenic Tacoma.

[CopperBowl]

This once epic thread has been TCUHornedFrogged to death.

Like seriously let's kick him out of this joint.

And get back to making this thread great again.

Possible epic first date where I spend the weekend with a girl and go on a multi state road trip...on the first date.

Will confirm.

[pvegs]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

I'll let Latrice know that. She seemed pretty drunk via text last night. Like I could hardly focus on watching Better Call Saul and parse her messages at the same time kind of deal.

You can tell her while you're happily parasailing over scenic Tacoma.

Sadly, Latrice went parasailing alone. That was def for the best, tho. I also now know what Tyler Lockett's dick looks like thanks to her snapchat. When we "smang" or whatever Mrs. Gooch was saying, I will have to live msg this thread. Both to keep everyone updated and also to make sure someone knows where to find my dead body.

[star seed 7]

if i ever go to seattle, i'd love to go parasailing

[Trim]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

I'll let Latrice know that. She seemed pretty drunk via text last night. Like I could hardly focus on watching Better Call Saul and parse her messages at the same time kind of deal.

You can tell her while you're happily parasailing over scenic Tacoma.

Sadly, Latrice went parasailing alone. That was def for the best, tho. I also now know what Tyler Lockett's dick looks like thanks to her snapchat. When we "smang" or whatever Mrs. Gooch was saying, I will have to live msg this thread. Both to keep everyone updated and also to make sure someone knows where to find my dead body.

If I went parasailing with her, would she be cool with me not wanting to talk about anything other than Marshawn the whole time?

[pvegs]

The really hot chick who gave a rim job to Marshawn will not stop messaging me and wants to go parasailing in Tacoma. How do I get out of this situation, and tell her there's like way easier situations closer that do not involve the money/time/annoyance/terror of heights?

This is the first you've let out that it was Marshawn.  She's a hero, and you should do whatever she wants.

I'll let Latrice know that. She seemed pretty drunk via text last night. Like I could hardly focus on watching Better Call Saul and parse her messages at the same time kind of deal.

You can tell her while you're happily parasailing over scenic Tacoma.

Sadly, Latrice went parasailing alone. That was def for the best, tho. I also now know what Tyler Lockett's dick looks like thanks to her snapchat. When we "smang" or whatever Mrs. Gooch was saying, I will have to live msg this thread. Both to keep everyone updated and also to make sure someone knows where to find my dead body.

If I went parasailing with her, would she be cool with me not wanting to talk about anything other than Marshawn the whole time?

I'll ask her now. We chatted ON THE PHONE last night. Who does that? I'll tell her this guy Trim who IS A FOLK HERO ON LOCAL AM RADIO and drives a Jeep with a giant Pak head just wants to chill with you in T-Town and talk Marshawn. How about it? 

[Trim]

Maybe just get her to start posting in the 'Hawks thread.

[pvegs]

Maybe just get her to start posting in the 'Hawks thread.

Will do. She went to undergrad at Alabama and dated some future Jet while there, so I feel she could turn that thread into a "Ron Prince Stories" level situation.

[Dugout DickStone]

That girl tries to brag more than fanning

[michigancat]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

[Dugout DickStone]

I wouldn't brag about that kind of stuff

[Kat Kid]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

I think you forgot what a humble brag is again.

[pvegs]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

mich, i am just being myself. i feel like we would be irl fronds. if i make it down to sf, we should hang. you going to the stanford game?

[michigancat]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

I think you forgot what a humble brag is again.

"ugh, this girl who normally dates professional athletes and will do all sorts of sexual acts won't stop calling me and asking me to do stuff with her!"

is like the epitome of the humblebrag

[michigancat]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

mich, i am just being myself. i feel like we would be irl fronds. if i make it down to sf, we should hang. you going to the stanford game?

Don't take it personally, of course we can hang out and I will gladly buy you a beer and ask about Seattle life and the biggest shithead you had in class this year and talk about your humblebrag with a big grin on my face for extra context.

[pvegs]

Let's be honest: pvegs has been humblebragging his ass off in this thread

mich, i am just being myself. i feel like we would be irl fronds. if i make it down to sf, we should hang. you going to the stanford game?

Don't take it personally, of course we can hang out and I will gladly buy you a beer and ask about Seattle life and the biggest shithead you had in class this year and talk about your humblebrag with a big grin on my face for extra context.

Good deal, man. Dat's a plan.

[Dugout DickStone]

yeah, the "she used to date :professionalathlete:" is not something to brag about.

Also, usually not true and just means he took her home and never called her again. 

[Kat Kid]

yeah, the "she used to date :professionalathlete:" is not something to brag about.

Also, usually not true and just means he took her home and never called her again.

I didnt see any of it as a humble brag because this.

[michigancat]

yeah, the "she used to date :professionalathlete:" is not something to brag about.

Also, usually not true and just means he took her home and never called her again.

I didnt see any of it as a humble brag because this.

well then shift the professional athlete dating into part of what makes it "humble"

humble: this chick dates Seahawks and won't stop asking me to do things with her I can't afford
brag: hot chick who is sexually adventurous (this could fall under humble, too) is way into me

[star seed 7]

I think he unbragged when he said she made fun of him for being a teacher

[pissclams]

i have a feeling that this one might need to go in front of the humble brag judgement committee