PICKUP BASKETBALL THREAD

[kougar24]

So, I've decided I hate playing with short 40-somethings, because it's almost a guarantee that they will drive with their head down every time they get the ball, and never pass...ever.

Michi', are you one of these?

[michigancat]

So, I've decided I hate playing with short 40-somethings, because it's almost a guarantee that they will drive with their head down every time they get the ball, and never pass...ever.

Michi', are you one of these?

I have zero of those traits.  You're a dick if you worry about who's passing you the ball, though.

[ben ji]

Is there anything more annoying than the 1 big guy who nobody can guard because their so tall/strong/athletic? Especially when you play with the same people every week and you know that whatever team he is on their going to win.

[michigancat]

Is there anything more annoying than the 1 big guy who nobody can guard because their so tall/strong/athletic? Especially when you play with the same people every week and you know that whatever team he is on their going to win.

Yeah, there's guy like that we play with from time to time.  He doesn't always win, but you have to completely focus on him if you want to.  It's really annoying when he's hitting 3's, too.

[Daddy Claxton]

we clowned him all game. 

Please share some examples of the trash you talked on MK while clowning him.  Seeing someone like MK get clowned, especially if trash talk is invlovled, is the best part of pick-up b-ball.

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

[kougar24]

So, I've decided I hate playing with short 40-somethings, because it's almost a guarantee that they will drive with their head down every time they get the ball, and never pass...ever.

Michi', are you one of these?

I have zero of those traits.  You're a dick if you worry about who's passing you the ball, though.

You're a bigger dick if you never pass the ball. I don't care if he passes to me, I just want him to pass it to anyone else not guarded by 3 people in the lane.

[michigancat]

we clowned him all game. 

Please share some examples of the trash you talked on MK while clowning him.  Seeing someone like MK get clowned, especially if trash talk is invlovled, is the best part of pick-up b-ball.

Naw, I pretty much just tell him how we're going to school him right to his face.  I'm no trim when it comes to talking trash.

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

You're a bigger dick if you never pass the ball. I don't care if he passes to me, I just want him to pass it to anyone else not guarded by 3 people in the lane.

Not really.  Whining about somebody else's play is the apex of pickup basketball dickdom.  I don't like Bob Knight, but he had a great line about a player not getting the ball enough one a game.  "We missed 35 shots tonight.  I'm fine with you grabbing as many of those you want."

[Daddy Claxton]

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

I didn't post the details because the encounter itself was not nearly as entertaining as the fact that it was a 45-yr old and a 35-yr old co-workers threatening to throw-down.  Not to mention, it's a bunch of old guys playing basketball at lunch, not the NBA Finals.  But, since you asked.....

The 45 y.o. seems to be the equivalent of your "Stubbles", without the shaved chest.  He's one of the best players, but is a real dick, and if he ever makes a turn over or something, he changes the rules or makes some other excuse.  Pretty much everyone has had a run-in with this guy at some point.

I'm on the same team as the 35-y.o. (call him the "IT Guy"), and we are playing against Stubbles-twin. It's game point (score tied, win by one) and Stubbles-twin throws the ball away, but makes a preposterous foul call.  IT Guy, who is mild mannered and usually very quiet, starts going off about that being a "pussy call" and puts his hands at his crotch with thumbs and fore-fingers together, making the shape of a triangle.

The argument continues, but the ball is eventually checked, Stubbles-twin's team keeping the ball.  Then another guy on our team makes a weak foul call against the offense, obviously in retaliation for the previous call by Stubbles-twin.  IT Guy starts saying that it's pointless to play like that, and that Stubbles-twin should keep the ball.  But, Stubbles-twin was so upset that he didn't listen to what IT Guy was actually saying, and Stubbles-twin continues to complain about the foul call.  IT Guy tells Stubbles-twin that he (Stubbles-twin) should shut his mouth [because we are actually trying to give him the ball back]. 

Stubbles-twin gets in IT Guy's face and says "IF I DON'T, ARE YOING GOING TO SHUT IT?"  IT Guy, who obviously spends some time in the weight room and looks like he could pummel Stubbles-twin, realizes how ridiculous all of it is and calmly says, "No, I'm not, but if you weren't such an idiot you would know that I am agreeing with you".  Stubbles-twin then says "THEN F#@% YOU!"  IT Guy had let it go at that point, but more name calling ensues, one guy walks out of the gym.  Nothing actually happens.  Some no name guy eventually scores to end the game and everyone went back to work.

[michigancat]

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

I didn't post the details because the encounter itself was not nearly as entertaining as the fact that it was a 45-yr old and a 35-yr old co-workers threatening to throw-down.  Not to mention, it's a bunch of old guys playing basketball at lunch, not the NBA Finals.  But, since you asked.....

The 45 y.o. seems to be the equivalent of your "Stubbles", without the shaved chest.  He's one of the best players, but is a real dick, and if he ever makes a turn over or something, he changes the rules or makes some other excuse.  Pretty much everyone has had a run-in with this guy at some point.

I'm on the same team as the 35-y.o. (call him the "IT Guy"), and we are playing against Stubbles-twin. It's game point (score tied, win by one) and Stubbles-twin throws the ball away, but makes a preposterous foul call.  IT Guy, who is mild mannered and usually very quiet, starts going off about that being a "pussy call" and puts his hands at his crotch with thumbs and fore-fingers together, making the shape of a triangle.

The argument continues, but the ball is eventually checked, Stubbles-twin's team keeping the ball.  Then another guy on our team makes a weak foul call against the offense, obviously in retaliation for the previous call by Stubbles-twin.  IT Guy starts saying that it's pointless to play like that, and that Stubbles-twin should keep the ball.  But, Stubbles-twin was so upset that he didn't listen to what IT Guy was actually saying, and Stubbles-twin continues to complain about the foul call.  IT Guy tells Stubbles-twin that he (Stubbles-twin) should shut his mouth [because we are actually trying to give him the ball back]. 

Stubbles-twin gets in IT Guy's face and says "IF I DON'T, ARE YOING GOING TO SHUT IT?"  IT Guy, who obviously spends some time in the weight room and looks like he could pummel Stubbles-twin, realizes how ridiculous all of it is and calmly says, "No, I'm not, but if you weren't such an idiot you would know that I am agreeing with you".  Stubbles-twin then says "THEN F#@% YOU!"  IT Guy had let it go at that point, but more name calling ensues, one guy walks out of the gym.  Nothing actually happens.  Some no name guy eventually scores to end the game and everyone went back to work.

LOL, that was a fantastic report.  Especially this: 

IT Guy, who is mild mannered and usually very quiet, starts going off about that being a "pussy call" and puts his hands at his crotch with thumbs and fore-fingers together, making the shape of a triangle.

[kougar24]

we clowned him all game. 

Please share some examples of the trash you talked on MK while clowning him.  Seeing someone like MK get clowned, especially if trash talk is invlovled, is the best part of pick-up b-ball.

Naw, I pretty much just tell him how we're going to school him right to his face.  I'm no trim when it comes to talking trash.

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

You're a bigger dick if you never pass the ball. I don't care if he passes to me, I just want him to pass it to anyone else not guarded by 3 people in the lane.

Not really.  Whining about somebody else's play is the apex of pickup basketball dickdom.  I don't like Bob Knight, but he had a great line about a player not getting the ball enough one a game.  "We missed 35 shots tonight.  I'm fine with you grabbing as many of those you want."

GMAFB, crashing the boards in a pickup game is Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!). And you're still missing the point. I don't care if he passes to me, I want him to pass to someone other than himself, because he sucks and has 3 people on him.

Can't believe this is so fracking hard for you to understand.

[chum1]

DC, that's a terrific story.  Loved it.  Kougz, that's just a waste.

[michigancat]

we clowned him all game.  

Please share some examples of the trash you talked on MK while clowning him.  Seeing someone like MK get clowned, especially if trash talk is invlovled, is the best part of pick-up b-ball.

Naw, I pretty much just tell him how we're going to school him right to his face.  I'm no trim when it comes to talking trash.

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

You're a bigger dick if you never pass the ball. I don't care if he passes to me, I just want him to pass it to anyone else not guarded by 3 people in the lane.

Not really.  Whining about somebody else's play is the apex of pickup basketball dickdom.  I don't like Bob Knight, but he had a great line about a player not getting the ball enough one a game.  "We missed 35 shots tonight.  I'm fine with you grabbing as many of those you want."

GMAFB, crashing the boards in a pickup game is Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!). And you're still missing the point. I don't care if he passes to me, I want him to pass to someone other than himself, because he sucks and has 3 people on him.

Can't believe this is so fracking hard for you to understand.

I understand completely....that you are a dickhead to play pickup basketball with.

[kougar24]

we clowned him all game.  

Please share some examples of the trash you talked on MK while clowning him.  Seeing someone like MK get clowned, especially if trash talk is invlovled, is the best part of pick-up b-ball.

Naw, I pretty much just tell him how we're going to school him right to his face.  I'm no trim when it comes to talking trash.

Nearly had a fist fight on the over-35 circuit yesterday.  Pretty awesome when a bunch of has-beens take it way too serious and make asses of themselves, especially when all the players on the court are technically co-workers.

This would be the perfect thread to post details of this encounter.

You're a bigger dick if you never pass the ball. I don't care if he passes to me, I just want him to pass it to anyone else not guarded by 3 people in the lane.

Not really.  Whining about somebody else's play is the apex of pickup basketball dickdom.  I don't like Bob Knight, but he had a great line about a player not getting the ball enough one a game.  "We missed 35 shots tonight.  I'm fine with you grabbing as many of those you want."

GMAFB, crashing the boards in a pickup game is Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!). And you're still missing the point. I don't care if he passes to me, I want him to pass to someone other than himself, because he sucks and has 3 people on him.

Can't believe this is so fracking hard for you to understand.

I understand completely....that you are a dickhead to play pickup basketball with.

 

[Daddy Claxton]

Never thought you guys would be so easily entertained.  I will try to pass along more episodes from the over-35 circuit.

[Trim]

I'm no trim when it comes to talking trash.

 

[Dr Rick Daris]

Never thought you guys would be so easily entertained.  I will try to pass along more episodes from the over-35 circuit.

you should. it was really good.

[_33]

Funny prank/trick/idea:

Next time you lose a pick-up game at the local Y or rec league game just collapse on the court and start sobbing uncontrollably.

[kougar24]

I'm curious to see how many KU fans show up to our MWF pick-up game today.

[michigancat]

Today, I had the shortest, least athletic guy guarding me, so I immediately post him up.  Every time, he like fouls the crap out of me, and I can't finish.  Felt dumb, and just wanted to bomb 3's. 

[stunz]

jumpstop: most simple, effective offensive move in pickup basketball?

i can't spin worth crap, unless its that bill walker move during the mcmw part in fatty's vid.

yesterday i lost control of the ball on a baseline drive, and while past the hoop, i flipped it up backwards without looking, and rattled it home. 

[weird roberts foam finger]

Today, I had the shortest, least athletic guy guarding me, so I immediately post him up.  Every time, he like fouls the crap out of me, and I can't finish.  Felt dumb, and just wanted to bomb 3's. 

This was my world as a post.  Eventually you get used to the hacking and can still power through it, junkyard cats style.   

Best thing about being tall in pickup basketball?  I'm tempted to say rebounding the ball over some short dude's head and having him complain about it.  Either that or myriad blocks you get in the lane which enable you to go Mutumbo on folks.   

[pissclams]

would be incred to have a goEMAW pick up basketPAK

imagine the potential directions this thread could take

[Dr Rick Daris]

would be incred to have a goEMAW pick up basketPAK

imagine the potential directions this thread could take

let's not do this but pretend that we did.


It was hilarious when i dunked all over pclamms's face btw. twice. 

[pissclams]

ok  but we were on the same team.  dumbass.   

[Dr Rick Daris]

ok  but we were on the same team.  dumbass.   

which is why i did it during warmups.