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« on: September 08, 2011, 09:07:26 AM »
It's a quiet September afternoon, and Baylor is sitting on the couch quietly, thinking about the changes over the last several years. Baylor has always lived in a humble home, but the neighboring houses have morphed from large houses to mansions. Texas' and Oklahoma's homes, especially. That doesn't really bother Baylor, though. After all, the land value has improved quite considerably. The doorbell rings.
Baylor: Oh, hello, Texas A&M.
A&M: Hi, Gaylor. I need you to sign this.
Baylor: Oh, what is that?
A&M: I've made new friends in the SEC, and they are way cooler than you mommies. This will let me go hang out with them.
Baylor: Why do I have to sign anything for you to make new friends?
A&M: (spits tobacco) Well, see, it's like this Gaylor. You guys suck, and don't even deserve what you have already, so eff you and sign it.
Baylor: (reads document) This says that I will waive my right to sue you for anything you do with your new SEC friends. Well, I'm not sure why I would want to sue you, but this seems pretty strange. (peers over A&M's shoulder) What is that in the driveway?
A&M: Well, see, my new SEC friends gave me this monster truck and bet me that I couldn't jump it over your house. They are so cool! (swallows tobacco in excitement)
Baylor: Do you even know how to drive a monster truck?
A&M: (stares blankly)
Baylor: I'm not signing that document, and if you destroy my house, I will have my friend, Ken Starr, sue you for every dime your worthless ass possesses.
A&M: You can't do that! What an bad person!