Maga clause day 1 update: As I was at the pool today alone (my kids all of the sudden won't hang out with me because I am "embarrassing") I saw a neighbor reach in his cooler and pull out a Bud Light. I was immediately triggered, I began to sob and when he handed one to his bud I urinated in my gym shorts that I also use as swim trunks. The pool patrons began to laugh at me and I stumbled to the rest room to collect my shattered self esteem.
I emerged with new vigor. I went to my cooler, pulled out a non-groomer natural light and strutted up to him. I simply asked him why he supported groomers (very fair question). To my utter horror he stated that the number one sponsor of the NFL is Bud Light and Wal-Mart sells it so until I stop going to any place that sells Bud Light and I stop watching football I am just an annoying bitch who fat gross man boobs that gets lint under them.
I smugly told him that the NBA is having some bad ratings and I think the entire group agreed I won easily. I grabbed my towel and took the win.
also, I think Desoros's dad killed President Lincoln. No one has shown me evidence he didn't