Author Topic: chum1's dumb job stories  (Read 53866 times)

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #300 on: September 27, 2019, 05:59:56 PM »
Here are some quotes/paraphrase from today's servant leadership meeting.

[VERY earnestly and enthusiastically] "There isn't anyone who doesn't like Christian Rock!"

"I can't be as good of a Christian as my dad. He would, like, lock himself in the bathroom for 90 minutes and read The Bible on the toilet."

D2 (who I would describe as the MAGA version of a gay man who doesn't yet fully know he's gay): I try not to talk about politics. I just try not to get into politics, you know? HOWEVER, that being said, there are just some things happening at the national level and, you know, it involves truth and telling lies. And sometimes I just see something in plain sight with my own eyes and then I hear about it reported in a different way and, you know, it's just ... "aaargh." Heh heh. So, anyway, I see those things and, instead of ignoring them, I seize the opportunity to use them as a teaching moment for my kids.
Owner/CEO: It's wonderful that you hear God telling you to do that.

how are these servant leadership things announced/advertised around the office?

Offline chum1

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #301 on: September 27, 2019, 06:38:15 PM »
how are these servant leadership things announced/advertised around the office?

They're explicitly voluntary. Usually, they only send an invite to people who have gone in the past. Sometimes, the invite goes to the entire company and is like, "would love to see you there." Owner/CEO sometimes mentions them in company meetings like, "this is our company mission and we'd love to see lots of people at the next one."

Offline steve dave

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #302 on: September 27, 2019, 10:11:44 PM »
Tell them you don’t feel comfortable attending because you’ve had an affair


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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #303 on: September 28, 2019, 09:39:07 AM »
how are these servant leadership things announced/advertised around the office?

They're explicitly voluntary. Usually, they only send an invite to people who have gone in the past. Sometimes, the invite goes to the entire company and is like, "would love to see you there." Owner/CEO sometimes mentions them in company meetings like, "this is our company mission and we'd love to see lots of people at the next one."
So like an Outlook calendar invite? Any flyers? What is your primary reason for going?

I've honestly never heard of anything like this anywhere else

Offline chum1

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #304 on: September 28, 2019, 09:53:26 AM »
how are these servant leadership things announced/advertised around the office?

They're explicitly voluntary. Usually, they only send an invite to people who have gone in the past. Sometimes, the invite goes to the entire company and is like, "would love to see you there." Owner/CEO sometimes mentions them in company meetings like, "this is our company mission and we'd love to see lots of people at the next one."
So like an Outlook calendar invite? Any flyers? What is your primary reason for going?

I've honestly never heard of anything like this anywhere else

Yeah, just Outlook. Hardly anyone goes. I go pretty much solely because Owner/CEO thinks it important. But I do have a relationship with him that I wouldn't have otherwise. And it can be somewhat entertaining/interesting/educational.

Offline chum1

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #305 on: October 02, 2019, 08:37:49 AM »
NEW ORG CHART!!!   :excited:

Here are notable changes.

* HRP, previously listed as Human Resources Principal over about a fourth of the company, is now listed as President/COO. This should surprise no one who has been following along.

* GG, previously listed as manager of my team, now listed as mere team member. Kinda surprising to see it official on paper.

* My team including D2, previously listed as under GG, now simply all listed together under no one. Again, kinda surprising to see official, but consistent with my impression of what HRP had said at the time I posted that I didn't know who would be managing our group down the road.

There are a couple other big changes, but I guess not concerning anyone I've previously discussed here.  :frown:

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #306 on: October 02, 2019, 08:49:42 AM »
Can you draw this up in a chart, providing a couple of keynotes on weird relationships or work things for each person? Kind of like the old Reno cheat sheets?
:adios:

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #307 on: October 02, 2019, 08:52:47 AM »
Good idea

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #308 on: October 02, 2019, 08:55:06 AM »
:excited:
:adios:

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #309 on: October 02, 2019, 08:55:23 AM »
Make sure to utilize the celebrity faces
Hyperbolic partisan duplicitous hypocrite

Offline chum1

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #310 on: October 02, 2019, 10:10:13 AM »
Old football guy: So, when I first started working here, D2 was VP of Operations. After he kind of fell out of favor, they hired some old totally stereotypical manager type guy who eventually settled into a VP of Operations type role. This caused one person to, upon learning that he'd be reporting to OFG, immediately resign and take a job at another company. My favorite thing about OFG, though, is that when he first started working here, he did a 'get to know everyone' thing on the company's social media. The blurb mentioned that he played college football with Phil Simms. Well, Phil Simms, the actual Phil Simms, liked this post on social media (along with like two other people). So, apparently OFG somehow asked Phil Simms to help him make a good impression on his new coworkers. Here's the funny part, though. Not one rough ridin' person noticed. Nothing. Complete radio silence. I saw, obviously, but I wasn't going to say crap about it to anyone.

OFG was listed on previous org chart over operations, and is listed on new org chart on sales team.


Young basketball girl: Was Owner/CEO's neighbor and babysitter as a girl. Played on a national champion DIII basketball team. SUUUUPER nice. SUUUPER good natured. I can't even think of any good stories about her. They'd all be innocent and wholesome. Really only mentioning her because of her new role.

YBG was listed on previous org chart over one of the operations teams, and is listed on new org chart as EVP, Operations.

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #311 on: October 02, 2019, 10:56:44 AM »
Old football guy: So, when I first started working here, D2 was VP of Operations. After he kind of fell out of favor, they hired some old totally stereotypical manager type guy who eventually settled into a VP of Operations type role. This caused one person to, upon learning that he'd be reporting to OFG, immediately resign and take a job at another company. My favorite thing about OFG, though, is that when he first started working here, he did a 'get to know everyone' thing on the company's social media. The blurb mentioned that he played college football with Phil Simms. Well, Phil Simms, the actual Phil Simms, liked this post on social media (along with like two other people). So, apparently OFG somehow asked Phil Simms to help him make a good impression on his new coworkers. Here's the funny part, though. Not one rough ridin' person noticed. Nothing. Complete radio silence. I saw, obviously, but I wasn't going to say crap about it to anyone.

OFG was listed on previous org chart over operations, and is listed on new org chart on sales team.


Young basketball girl: Was Owner/CEO's neighbor and babysitter as a girl. Played on a national champion DIII basketball team. SUUUUPER nice. SUUUPER good natured. I can't even think of any good stories about her. They'd all be innocent and wholesome. Really only mentioning her because of her new role.

YBG was listed on previous org chart over one of the operations teams, and is listed on new org chart as EVP, Operations.
LMAO what a treat

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #312 on: October 03, 2019, 09:21:33 AM »
I spotted FG walking by our door. We did a quick wave. She then immediately reappeared, came in, and said, "what'd you do, run everyone off?" I realized that no one else is in the room. She invited me to go work out with her in the gym. Today, but also, like, regularly. Then, she started talking about this new fitness place that she wants to try, but doesn't have anyone to go with.

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #313 on: October 03, 2019, 09:23:53 AM »
I just realized that I never told the story about how FG and I went to the grand opening of this guy's airplane hangar together and I got kinda drunk.

I'm not really sure how old Roy is. Retirement age. The first time I met him, he walked into my conference room office, said, "So, what is it you do around here," pulled up a chair, and sat down. I immediately thought, "OH crap," sat up striaght, and tried to make myself sound as important as possible. Then, he pulled out his phone and showed me live video streams from about 25 cameras in his brand new airplane hangar packed full of shiny airplanes ready for use in who knows what sort of commercial aviation endeavor. Then, he asked me if I knew anything about QuickBooks, adding that they were having some issues with it at the airport.

The next time I saw him, he pulled out his phone again. More airplane hangar live streams. After that, live streams of a couple hotel lobbies, bars, and restaurants. He explained how he had a camera on the point-of-sale touchscreen in order to monitor if customers were getting charged or comped for drinks. I understand that he also owns a strip club that he won in a poker game, but the streams he showed me were all G-rated. I told him to let me know if he still needed help with QuickBooks. He replied, "Okay! I'm not bashful!"

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #314 on: October 03, 2019, 09:31:04 AM »
The best story about YBG, who is totally innocent and wholesome, is probably about how she had to go to Roy's dive of a strip club to sign up the employees (strippers) for some service that our company was providing to Roy's strip club.

Offline 8manpick

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #315 on: October 03, 2019, 09:45:44 AM »
Can you draw this up in a chart, providing a couple of keynotes on weird relationships or work things for each person? Kind of like the old Reno cheat sheets?
Also need reminders of all the abbreviations. TIA
:adios:

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #316 on: October 03, 2019, 10:01:37 AM »
Chum's sig needs to be a link to a dramatis personæ for this thread, including org chart and celebrity look alike pictures.

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #317 on: October 03, 2019, 10:08:17 AM »
Ya. I'm lost. Who is FG?

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #318 on: October 03, 2019, 01:53:25 PM »
Chart is in post #1 of this thread!

Offline Church Creeper

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #319 on: October 03, 2019, 02:01:32 PM »
 :Woohoo:

Offline chum1

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #320 on: October 03, 2019, 02:16:37 PM »
I just added Roy.

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #321 on: October 03, 2019, 02:18:34 PM »
Have you considered making this a podcast?

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #322 on: October 03, 2019, 02:23:13 PM »
Oh hell yes
:adios:

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #323 on: October 03, 2019, 02:46:38 PM »
Thank you, sir! I had forgot about FG!

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Re: chum1's dumb job stories
« Reply #324 on: October 03, 2019, 02:58:38 PM »
This part of the chart is rough ridin' hilarious and I can't stop laughing at it.

Quote
No one noticed that Phil Simms liked his social media post.