Old Couple sitting at table in suburban Johnson County:
Hand me the Coupons from the Paper Dear (husband hands over coupons doesn't look up from daily Crossword)
(Wife Thumbing through coupons): okay, Borax-50 cents off, Prep H . . . 2 for 1, Ocean Spray Prunes . . . Bogo!! Boom!! . . . oh, you out of Polident Honey??
(Husband now in other room falling asleep on "easy chair"): Yeah . . . they got a deal huh?
(Wife) Yes 75 cents off if you buy 2.
(Husband): Get the Peppermint ones!!
(Wife): Oh look at this (Husband thinks "How the F_ck can I look at that?? I am all the way out here in the living room) . . . it's a deal . . . let's see . . . it's a coupon for ku football games (wife reads aloud but in a whisper) . . . it says that if we show up at the ticket window with this coupon we get cheap tickets to a couple of ku football games.
(Wife now standing looking into living room at husband nearly asleep in easy chair) What do you think Hon . . . that sounds like fun.
(Husband now nearly asleep) Does it look like I want to drive all the way over there for a football game??
(Wife) It's not today.
(Husband) When is it?
(Wife) Saturday
(Husband) I have golf and then I need to trim the shrubs.
(Wife) Okay . . . oh look, Tyson chicken fingers . . .