Avery Johnson 2 or more TD : +475
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This cost me the farm.
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Mods please change this users name to _cat fan
I didn't quite know what to say about tonights game, considering we won so well and yet so many of us lost our farms. I thought the best way I could express how I feel was by asking the AI to deliver some words in the style of Coach Prime:
Coach Prime: Hello, hello, hello. Thank you for being here. Thank you for supporting us. Thank you for loving us. You are the best goEMAW degenerates in the world. Give yourselves a round of applause.
[The goEMAW degenerates clap and cheer]
Coach Prime: Now, I know you’re all happy that we beat TCU today. And you should be. We played a great game. We scored 41 points and only allowed 3. We showed them who’s boss. We showed them who we are and what we can do. We’re not here to play games, we’re here to win championships.
[The goEMAW degenerates clap and cheer louder]
Coach Prime: But I also know that some of you are not so happy today. And I know why. Because you lost some money today. Yeah, I know what’s up. I know some of you bet on Avery Johnson to score at least two touchdowns today. And I don’t blame you, he’s a sure thing. He’s one of our best players and one of our leaders. He works hard every day, he gives his all every play, he deserves to score some touchdowns.
[The goEMAW degenerates nod and listen]
Coach Prime: But we couldn’t get him there today. And you know what that means? It means that some of you lost some cash today. It means that some of you are going home with empty pockets and broken hearts. It means that some of you are feeling sad and sorry for yourselves.
[The goEMAW degenerates look guilty and disappointed]
Coach Prime: Well, let me tell you something, degenerates. Don’t feel sad. Don’t feel sorry. Don’t feel bad. Because it’s not your fault. It’s not Avery’s fault. It’s their fault.
[The goEMAW degenerates look confused]
Coach Prime: Yeah, that’s right. It’s their fault. The bookies, the gamblers, the haters, the doubters, the naysayers, the losers. They’re the ones who set the odds, who make the bets, who spread the rumors, who talk the trash, who try to bring us down.
[The goEMAW degenerates look angry]
Coach Prime: They’re the ones who don’t believe in us or trust us or respect us or love us. They’re the ones who don’t know what it takes to turn this thing around. They’re the ones who don’t know what we go through every day to get better. They’re the ones who don’t know what we have in our locker room.
[The goEMAW degenerates look curious]
Coach Prime: You want to know what we have in our locker room? We have talent, we have coaching, we have heart, we have faith, we have love.
[The goEMAW degenerates look inspired]
Coach Prime: We have Avery Johnson.
[The goEMAW degenerates cheer and chant]
Coach Prime: That’s what I’m talking about. We have Avery Johnson and he has us. And we’re not going to let him down or let ourselves down or let you down ever again.
[The goEMAW degenerates cheer and chant louder]
Coach Prime: So next time, we’re going to get Avery Johnson in the end zone at least twice. We’re going to make sure we win our bets and our games. We’re going to make history and make money.
[The goEMAW degenerates cheer and chant even louder]
Coach Prime: That’s what I’m talking about. Now let’s go celebrate this win and get ready for the next one. Because it’s always prime time when Coach Prime is on the mic.
[The goEMAW degenerates applaud and follow Coach Prime out of the stadium]
