I was thinking Liam Neeson's slow drawl could really capture the turning knife that was every young person who couldn't tigger up and every schedule maker that lined up back to back teams. Plus, he could really Irish up this latest dagger being on St. Patrick's Day. Maybe open it with a good medley track and some pearls of Irish wisdom e.g. The road to the final 32 rose to meet our plucky wildcats that day, but alas it was not to be because, you know, adversity.