Official KU Coaching Search

[Skipper44]

Raheem Morris
2.5 Million

Conference experience. Awesome recruiter. Swaggier than swagwood's whole family. In the market for a better job than NFL position coach.  I would be so rough ridin' jealous I don't know what I would do.

Thats my nightmare scenario, I want him when Bill leaves us so bad.

would make so much easier.  I bet he could even salvage the Addidas uniforms

[Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)]

I hope they don't hire Carl. They are way too good of a job for that bad person.

If I recall correctly,  he's pro rape, so it's a natural fit.

[bshea85]

Phil Bennett.  Ties to Kansas and coaching experience in Texas.  Could get the recruits he needs.  Would be awesome seeing him at KU. 
Give the man a 3 year contract for $1.5mil/year with a $500k bonus if he beats Baylor.

The only downside is that SMU sucked while he was coaching, but honestly, I don't think you can blame the coach on that one....

[Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)]

Can we also use this thread to document the mental, emotional, and physical characteristics that the ideal candidate should possess?


Here is what I am thinking:

If we really nail down these characteristics, then we can use those to accurately predict the next KU coach.  Once we do that, we can enter into some pretty serious arbitrage arrangements, and really leverage our algorithm.

Five D's Of Character
Deluded sense of one's own self worth
Dearth of foresight and fortitude
Discipline,  pffft no thanks
Diabetes, I'll have 2 please
Dollar signs

[Katpappy]

Ed Straight Arrow Genero

This guy has got KU written all over him. 

[OK_Cat]

Phil Bennett.  Ties to Kansas and coaching experience in Texas.  Could get the recruits he needs.  Would be awesome seeing him at KU. 
Give the man a 3 year contract for $1.5mil/year with a $500k bonus if he beats Baylor.

The only downside is that SMU sucked while he was coaching, but honestly, I don't think you can blame the coach on that one....

He would bring electricity to a stale program

[Tobias]

and there it is

[star seed 7]

A "spark" joke would have been better

[Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)]

Eric Bienemy (sp?)
College football and nfl (chiefs coach) experience
Fat

[Katpappy]

Phil Bennett.  Ties to Kansas and coaching experience in Texas.  Could get the recruits he needs.  Would be awesome seeing him at KU. 
Give the man a 3 year contract for $1.5mil/year with a $500k bonus if he beats Baylor.

The only downside is that SMU sucked while he was coaching, but honestly, I don't think you can blame the coach on that one....

He would bring electricity to a stale program

Shocking news! 

[wetwillie]

I'd take a real hard look at Dameyune Craig.  1.2 Million per year.    They need a huge shot in the arm recruiting wise and I think he could compile a staff that would get it done.  They need to take a calculated risk on an unproven coordinator at a relatively low salary figure. 

[pissclams]

Eric Bienemy (sp?)
College football and nfl (chiefs coach) experience
Fat

he lives next to me.
we have some good pizza places in the neighborhood.  when he first moved in, he walked by me and another neighbor.  other neighbor asked where he was heading.
his response, california pizza kitchen.  me and other neighbor both face-palmed and educated him on local pizzerias

true story

[Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)]

Eric Bienemy (sp?)
College football and nfl (chiefs coach) experience
Fat

he lives next to me.
we have some good pizza places in the neighborhood.  when he first moved in, he walked by me and another neighbor.  other neighbor asked where he was heading.
his response, california pizza kitchen.  me and other neighbor both face-palmed and educated him on local pizzerias

true story

Probably took your suggestions and made a progressive dinner out of it

[CNS]

Josh McDanield

[Michiganisstillgood]

Brady Hoke

He's pretty fat, so KU could save on coach's gear and office chairs and stuff that Weis left behind, plus, it's just continuity. He has one good year at every place he's coached, which is better than nothing. He'll be unemployed soon, and we'll be paying him 2 mil next year so you could probably get him on the cheap.

He recruits really well, actually. So there's that too. He doesn't wear a headset so you can save a bit there.

I know KU probably has their heart set on Harbaugh, but he's a lot less interested now that the tracks been removed.

[bones129]

Brady Hoke

He's pretty fat, so KU could save on coach's gear and office chairs and stuff that Weis left behind, plus, it's just continuity. He has one good year at every place he's coached, which is better than nothing. He'll be unemployed soon, and we'll be paying him 2 mil next year so you could probably get him on the cheap.

He recruits really well, actually. So there's that too. He doesn't wear a headset so you can save a bit there.

I know KU probably has their heart set on Harbaugh, but he's a lot less interested now that the tracks been removed.

lol

[catzacker]

I was dead serious about my Mike Leach suggestion.  I just hope KU does not hire him, because he would be an awesome replacement for Snyder.

I mean, does it get any better?

It was just another Monday, but then Washington State coach Mike Leach had to go out and predict the end of human kind. Because of course he did.

"I'm not really good with technology. All this button pushing and whatnot. I mean, you can just imagine based on what's happened in the last 15 years. Conversations won't happen 10 years from now. There aren't going to be people to talk to, it's going to be this (mimics pushing buttons). 'Do you want to go out on a date with me?' 'I don't know, what do you look like?' 'Well I look kind of like this.' 'OK, what are your interests?' 'Well, what do you think my interests are? Looking to this thing and typing into this just like yours are.' 'Yeah, no kidding, that's what everybody's doing.' 'Well, where do you want to go?' 'Well, what difference does it make? Because all we're going to be doing is looking into machines anyways.' Well, that's true and in the end, it's going to tough to perpetuate the species. There's no question about that. So we're all going to look in this box and eventually be extinct. That's how it ends."

[sonofdaxjones]

. . . So we're all going to look in this box and eventually be extinct. That's how it ends."   

[Cartierfor3]

 

[CNS]

Mike is an amazingly interesting individual.   I would love to have him close by again.

[Fldermaus]

Brady Hoke

He's pretty fat, so KU could save on coach's gear and office chairs and stuff that Weis left behind, plus, it's just continuity. He has one good year at every place he's coached, which is better than nothing. He'll be unemployed soon, and we'll be paying him 2 mil next year so you could probably get him on the cheap.

He recruits really well, actually. So there's that too. He doesn't wear a headset so you can save a bit there.

I know KU probably has their heart set on Harbaugh, but he's a lot less interested now that the tracks been removed.

Honestly, ku should pursue this in hopes of catching oscar Weber-esque lightning in a bottle.  It's their ceiling.

[CNS]

The soft J jokes basically write themselves. 

[Big Sam]

I was dead serious about my Mike Leach suggestion.  I just hope KU does not hire him, because he would be an awesome replacement for Snyder.

I mean, does it get any better?

It was just another Monday, but then Washington State coach Mike Leach had to go out and predict the end of human kind. Because of course he did.

"I'm not really good with technology. All this button pushing and whatnot. I mean, you can just imagine based on what's happened in the last 15 years. Conversations won't happen 10 years from now. There aren't going to be people to talk to, it's going to be this (mimics pushing buttons). 'Do you want to go out on a date with me?' 'I don't know, what do you look like?' 'Well I look kind of like this.' 'OK, what are your interests?' 'Well, what do you think my interests are? Looking to this thing and typing into this just like yours are.' 'Yeah, no kidding, that's what everybody's doing.' 'Well, where do you want to go?' 'Well, what difference does it make? Because all we're going to be doing is looking into machines anyways.' Well, that's true and in the end, it's going to tough to perpetuate the species. There's no question about that. So we're all going to look in this box and eventually be extinct. That's how it ends."

So, Mike Leach has basically explained why Japan has no birth rate (well, between that and Manga, tentacle-porn and sex-bots).

[Emo EMAW]

Plz don't make me Google "Manga."

[RickRampus]

I was dead serious about my Mike Leach suggestion.  I just hope KU does not hire him, because he would be an awesome replacement for Snyder.

I mean, does it get any better?

It was just another Monday, but then Washington State coach Mike Leach had to go out and predict the end of human kind. Because of course he did.

"I'm not really good with technology. All this button pushing and whatnot. I mean, you can just imagine based on what's happened in the last 15 years. Conversations won't happen 10 years from now. There aren't going to be people to talk to, it's going to be this (mimics pushing buttons). 'Do you want to go out on a date with me?' 'I don't know, what do you look like?' 'Well I look kind of like this.' 'OK, what are your interests?' 'Well, what do you think my interests are? Looking to this thing and typing into this just like yours are.' 'Yeah, no kidding, that's what everybody's doing.' 'Well, where do you want to go?' 'Well, what difference does it make? Because all we're going to be doing is looking into machines anyways.' Well, that's true and in the end, it's going to tough to perpetuate the species. There's no question about that. So we're all going to look in this box and eventually be extinct. That's how it ends."

he'd be perfect for a replacement for Snyder.  Hates technology, wants to stay old-school, except where it counts.  #EMAWPIRATE