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Oct 31
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By Max Olson | ESPN.com
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Happy Halloween, dear readers. To commemorate this frightful holiday, here’s a look at the Big 12 teams, coaches and players who might have a few things in common with some classic horror movie villains.
Michael Myers (“Halloween”): Oklahoma Sooners
The villain that just will not die. Deal them a couple body blows -- losing Corey Nelson, Jordan Phillips and Trey Millard -- and they just keep going. Got blown out by Texas and lived another day to light up Texas Tech. Like Myers, too, this Sooners team still has a bit of a faceless identity on both sides of the ball.
The Alien (“Aliens”): Baylor Bears
Pretty much a perfect fit here. Highly evolved and truly deadly. Loaded up with blades from head to toe and pumping with yellowish-green acid blood. There’s really no way of preparing for its wrath, and it’ll kill you much faster than the average human villain.
Jaws (“Jaws”): Texas Longhorns
The big fish of the Big 12 is finally playing with some bite after lurking in the water early on. Like most murderous sharks, they’re catching people by surprise and playing like they have nothing to lose.
Dracula (“Dracula”): Kansas State coach LHC Bill Snyder
Though he’s typically revered for being a wizard, it’s not unfair to see a few parallels between the oldest coach in FBS (74) and the undead. He’s not a bloodsucker, but he has admitted to eating only one meal a day, typically at Taco Bell.
Beetlejuice (“Beetlejuice”): West Virginia coach Dana Holgorsen
The bravado and the hair make this a good fit. Have to imagine Beetlejuice’s salesmanship in the model graveyard is a lot like how Hologorsen recruits, right?
Pile Of Crap (“Envy”): Kansas Jayhawks
Well, you know, this is pretty self-explanatory. “Envy,” about a man inventing a magical spray that makes piles of crap disappear, isn’t a horror movie. But it is a horrible movie.
