Coworker quotes

[felix rex]

A local hire (Egyptian) asked why black Americans were more athletic than white Americans. Immediately got this response from skinny social science guy who wears glasses and a loose belt (<--I don't know why this detail is relevant but it bothers me):

That's actually a very racist misconception. The reason for the prominence of African Americans in professional sports is the inherently more disciplined work ethic of their urban culture due to desperation born of white oppression of other economic opportunities.

This was followed by awkward silence and everyone slowly backing out of the room and a very confused Egyptian.

[wetwillie]

A local hire (Egyptian) asked why black Americans were more athletic than white Americans. Immediately got this response from skinny social science guy who wears glasses and a loose belt (<--I don't know why this detail is relevant but it bothers me):

That's actually a very racist misconception. The reason for the prominence of African Americans in professional sports is the inherently more disciplined work ethic of their urban culture due to desperation born of white oppression of other economic opportunities.

This was followed by awkward silence and everyone slowly backing out of the room and a very confused Egyptian.

Finally. Glad someone had the stones to say it.

[Microwave]

Not from a coworker, but heard a gem from one of my english 415 class mates (in regards to community colleges being less prestigious than universities)

"I used to go to JCCC, the classes i took there were harder than the ones here"   

Engineer outed

 

[Institutional Control]

A local hire (Egyptian) asked why black Americans were more athletic than white Americans. Immediately got this response from skinny social science guy who wears glasses and a loose belt (<--I don't know why this detail is relevant but it bothers me):

That's actually a very racist misconception. The reason for the prominence of African Americans in professional sports is the inherently more disciplined work ethic of their urban culture due to desperation born of white oppression of other economic opportunities.

This was followed by awkward silence and everyone slowly backing out of the room and a very confused Egyptian.

And that's why Michael Jordan's kid sucked at basketball.

[Unruly]

A local hire (Egyptian) asked why black Americans were more athletic than white Americans. Immediately got this response from skinny social science guy who wears glasses and a loose belt (<--I don't know why this detail is relevant but it bothers me):

That's actually a very racist misconception. The reason for the prominence of African Americans in professional sports is the inherently more disciplined work ethic of their urban culture due to desperation born of white oppression of other economic opportunities.

This was followed by awkward silence and everyone slowly backing out of the room and a very confused Egyptian.

And that's why Michael Jordan's kid sucked at basketball.

TLBL? 

[mocat]

Surprised he didn't go the high upper calf muscle route or whatever

[felix rex]

Surprised he didn't go the high upper calf muscle route or whatever

Extra tendon in the foot.

[KSUBrian]

Surprised he didn't go the high upper calf muscle route or whatever

Extra tendon in the foot.

Higher testosterone levels? 

[felix rex]

Surprised he didn't go the high upper calf muscle route or whatever

Extra tendon in the foot.

Higher testosterone levels? 

To clarify, we're making fun of ones we've heard, not trying to come up with new ones. Get your crap together, Brian.

[Cire]

Co worker went to court to fight a speeding ticket because.   "I was going exactly five mph over the limit"

[felix rex]

Co worker went to court to fight a speeding ticket because.   "I was going exactly five mph over the limit"

lol

[KSUBrian]

Surprised he didn't go the high upper calf muscle route or whatever

Extra tendon in the foot.

Higher testosterone levels? 

To clarify, we're making fun of ones we've heard, not trying to come up with new ones. Get your crap together, Brian.

Sorry Rex. I'll try to do better next time.

[EllRobersonisInnocent]

Boss: "Hey Ell, why don't you go mingle at the Chamber of Commerce after hours tonight, someones gotta show their face from here"

Ell: 

[SabiNation]

Coworker 1: "So the asteroid is going to hit this afternoon?"

Coworker 2: "No I heard the meteorite already hit like somewhere in Siberia.  Apparently it hit thousands of people.  I didn't even know that there were thousands of people that lived in Siberia!"

Coworker 1: "Heh. Yah. I thought it was vacated."

[michigancat]

could almost go into the political FB thread. anyway, Indiana coworker just came to my desk to tell me he got this great new email:

For those of you who have never traveled to the west, or southwest, cattle guards are horizontal steel rails placed at fence openings, in dug-out places in the roads adjacent to highways (sometimes across highways), to prevent cattle from crossing over that area. For some reason the cattle will not step on the "guards," probably because they fear getting their feet caught between the rails.

A few months ago, President Obama received and was reading a report that there were over 100,000 cattle guards in Colorado . The Colorado ranchers had protested his proposed changes in grazing policies, so he ordered the Secretary of the Interior to fire half of the "cattle" guards immediately!

Before the Secretary of the Interior could respond and presumably try to straighten President Obama out on the matter, Vice-President Joe Biden, intervened with a request that ... before any "cattle" guards were fired, they be given six months of retraining for Arizona border guards. 'Times are hard', said Joe Biden, 'it's only fair to the cattle guards and their families!'

I mean, I actually think he thought it was real.

Oh, he also told me the Dow was going to lose 90% of his value this year, and he knows this because George Soros and Warren Buffet are unloading bank stocks.

[pissclams]

Boss: "Hey Ell, why don't you go mingle at the Chamber of Commerce after hours tonight, someones gotta show their face from here"

Ell: 

should of gone bro, tons of puss at those things

[steve dave]

could almost go into the political FB thread. anyway, Indiana coworker just came to my desk to tell me he got this great new email:

For those of you who have never traveled to the west, or southwest, cattle guards are horizontal steel rails placed at fence openings, in dug-out places in the roads adjacent to highways (sometimes across highways), to prevent cattle from crossing over that area. For some reason the cattle will not step on the "guards," probably because they fear getting their feet caught between the rails.

A few months ago, President Obama received and was reading a report that there were over 100,000 cattle guards in Colorado . The Colorado ranchers had protested his proposed changes in grazing policies, so he ordered the Secretary of the Interior to fire half of the "cattle" guards immediately!

Before the Secretary of the Interior could respond and presumably try to straighten President Obama out on the matter, Vice-President Joe Biden, intervened with a request that ... before any "cattle" guards were fired, they be given six months of retraining for Arizona border guards. 'Times are hard', said Joe Biden, 'it's only fair to the cattle guards and their families!'

I mean, I actually think he thought it was real.

Oh, he also told me the Dow was going to lose 90% of his value this year, and he knows this because George Soros and Warren Buffet are unloading bank stocks.

this guy seems like such a treat to work with

[michigancat]

could almost go into the political FB thread. anyway, Indiana coworker just came to my desk to tell me he got this great new email:

For those of you who have never traveled to the west, or southwest, cattle guards are horizontal steel rails placed at fence openings, in dug-out places in the roads adjacent to highways (sometimes across highways), to prevent cattle from crossing over that area. For some reason the cattle will not step on the "guards," probably because they fear getting their feet caught between the rails.

A few months ago, President Obama received and was reading a report that there were over 100,000 cattle guards in Colorado . The Colorado ranchers had protested his proposed changes in grazing policies, so he ordered the Secretary of the Interior to fire half of the "cattle" guards immediately!

Before the Secretary of the Interior could respond and presumably try to straighten President Obama out on the matter, Vice-President Joe Biden, intervened with a request that ... before any "cattle" guards were fired, they be given six months of retraining for Arizona border guards. 'Times are hard', said Joe Biden, 'it's only fair to the cattle guards and their families!'

I mean, I actually think he thought it was real.

Oh, he also told me the Dow was going to lose 90% of his value this year, and he knows this because George Soros and Warren Buffet are unloading bank stocks.

this guy seems like such a treat to work with

He really is, especially when he goes off on management in a hushed voice. Sometimes he'll come to me furious to vent about someone in China calling something a screw instead of a bolt of something. Those are special times.

[mocat]

oh wow 

[KSUblumpkin]

This happened yesterday in an office for the insane (keep in mind I am nuts but aware of my insanity).  I work with the troubled child and my fellow co-worker work's with the mother.

Blumpkin to fellow clinician: "Hey, I noticed the diagnosis codes were completely wrong on the paper work you were sending to the 
                                      state.  I'm pretty sure X17.32 is not and ICD-9 diagnosis code."

Fellow clinician to Blumperz: "Oh crap, that is my personal code for crazy across a myriad of disorders.  X is a confirmed diagnosis
                                       across 17 spectrums.  The .32 tells me she is 32."

Blumpkin to fellow clinician: "That's awesome.  I need to develop this kind of code for ladies I see at the bar."

Fellow clinician to Blumperz: "Just add another decimal and number for the boob size and you are good to roll for the ones that will do
                                       the kinky stuff...the kind of girl you usually go for."

Blumperz to fellow clinician: "You know me too well.  I owe you a beer."

[Teddy_Westside]

According to Microwave:  TJ Ford is better than any kstate player ever

[Teddy_Westside]

 According to Microwave:  I with kstate was Texas

[steve dave]

According to Microwave:  I with kstate was Texas

yeah, I agree with this one actually

[Institutional Control]

I didn't really care for "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"

 

[Emo EMAW]

I can't afford your $20 bracket because I'm poor.