Kurtis Townsend loves porn

[Kat Kid]

Ha, Parrish is awesome.

Jimmy Elgas used to have a section reserved for co-ed/porn star ticket hand-outs.   I think it was section 24.

this was also awesome.

This is not funny at all.

[kso_FAN]

More from Parrish:

http://www.cbssports.com/collegebasketball/story/13013518/friday-look-ahead-donovans-gators-dont-need-distractions-at-uk

[ZappaCat]

More from Parrish:

http://www.cbssports.com/collegebasketball/story/13013518/friday-look-ahead-donovans-gators-dont-need-distractions-at-uk

Final thought: Yes, I'm now following Samantha Ryan (@SammyRyRy) on Twitter.

She's a relevant person in college basketball.

That's my excuse ... or at least the best reason I could manufacture.

Anyway, you can imagine my excitement when @SammyRyRy updated her Twitter account late Thursday/early Friday with a message to everybody making a big deal out of her getting tickets from a KU assistant. The Tweet read as follows: "You can waste your time making this into something it is not, but all I can say is that I do great things for people, strangers, my friends."

My response to Ms. Ryan: Nobody is arguing that.

People have seen you do all sorts of great things.

Sometimes two or three at a time.

LOL

[Ira Hayes]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

I'm picturing Townsend sitting in a living room convincing some mom to trust her kid's future with him.

Then Dalonte walking in right after and saying: "Yeah, Kurtis is a nice guy, I'm glad his wife didn't leave him for giving courtside tickets to that porn star.  I'd hate to see those five kids of his suffer through a divorce."

Need an opinion from MomBeasy on this one.

[michigancat]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

[sonofdaxjones]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

There's not a more humorless group of fans on the planet.   

[CNS]

Serious Q:

How many home custom home vids are courtsides worth?

[Dr Rick Daris]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

1) in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal imo. hilarious to talk about and stuff but ultimately...why should anyone other than his wife and family and maybe his employer care?

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

[Trim]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

1) in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal imo. hilarious to talk about and stuff but ultimately...why should anyone other than his wife and family and maybe his employer care?

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

If Pete wasn't such a pussy and/or still high on oxygen when he flew home from Vegas, he could've chatted up StanBot and we wouldn't have any Big 12/NCAA tournament ticket issues.

[Dr Rick Daris]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

1) in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal imo. hilarious to talk about and stuff but ultimately...why should anyone other than his wife and family and maybe his employer care?

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

If Pete wasn't such a pussy and/or still high on oxygen when he flew home from Vegas, he could've chatted up StanBot and we wouldn't have any Big 12/NCAA tournament ticket issues.

PETE! 

[michigancat]

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

I don't know if they buy it or not.

My favorite part was the "they have to give a ton of these away all the time!  Of course they would give tickets to the biggest game in history to some random chick on a plane!"

[Pete]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

1) in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal imo. hilarious to talk about and stuff but ultimately...why should anyone other than his wife and family and maybe his employer care?

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

If Pete wasn't such a pussy and/or still high on oxygen when he flew home from Vegas, he could've chatted up StanBot and we wouldn't have any Big 12/NCAA tournament ticket issues.

PETE! 

Sat right next to him.  I'm certain that I stunk, and I was trying with all my might not to puke on Stanbot.

Deni was sitting right behind me and some old powerespect was lecturing Deni about all the "crime and corruption in Puerto Rico."  Loads of LOL moments, had I not been trying to not puke on Stanbot.

[Trim]

It's funny that KU fans think this is no big deal.

No, what's funny is they are saying it's no big deal while simultaneously having no ability to laugh at the situation.  I'm actually jealous (a lot) Matt Figger wasn't involved in a situation like this.

1) in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal imo. hilarious to talk about and stuff but ultimately...why should anyone other than his wife and family and maybe his employer care?

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

If Pete wasn't such a pussy and/or still high on oxygen when he flew home from Vegas, he could've chatted up StanBot and we wouldn't have any Big 12/NCAA tournament ticket issues.

PETE! 

Sat right next to him.  I'm certain that I stunk, and I was trying with all my might not to puke on Stanbot.

Deni was sitting right behind me and some old powerespect was lecturing Deni about all the "crime and corruption in Puerto Rico."  Loads of LOL moments, had I not been trying to not puke on Stanbot.

Especially on a flight out of Vegas, I take it KSU's resident porn star was seated next to Dalonte - USING HER REAL NAME, MIND YOU - securing what should've been our courtside seats.

[Dr Rick Daris]

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

I don't know if they buy it or not.

My favorite part was the "they have to give a ton of these away all the time!  Of course they would give tickets to the biggest game in history to some random chick on a plane!"

that is top five for me, but my favorite part was "guys it has to be true because their stories match up.". really? i mean...really???

[Pete]

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

I don't know if they buy it or not.

My favorite part was the "they have to give a ton of these away all the time!  Of course they would give tickets to the biggest game in history to some random chick on a plane!"

that is top five for me, but my favorite part was "guys it has to be true because their stories match up.". really? i mean...really???

Ya, that's pretty insulting.  As if one of the marquee "bag men" in the NCAA is not going to get his stories lined up before he call Jason Witlock. GMAFB.

It's Kurtis fracking Townsend.  

[Trim]

The porn shop inside Bazooka's should run specials on Samantha Ryan movies during the Big 12 tourney.

[Pete]

The porn shop inside Bazooka's should run specials on Samantha Ryan movies during the Big 12 tourney.

Maybe they could get her to a guest appearance?

Dooley and I went to All-Starrs in Lawrence once, and they had Porn star in there doing a guest appearance and signing autographed DVD's and stuff. 

[JavaCat]

2) for the life of me, i can't understand how ku fans believe the story about the random encounter on the airplane. i mean seriously. are they just trying to bbs or do they seriously buy it? i think they seriously buy it. i'd be lol'ing if figs or te or most likely undy did something like this.

I don't know if they buy it or not.

My favorite part was the "they have to give a ton of these away all the time!  Of course they would give tickets to the biggest game in history to some random chick on a plane!"

that is top five for me, but my favorite part was "guys it has to be true because their stories match up.". really? i mean...really???

That was good. I was a little surprised it took a few posts for someone to bite on Rusty's "greatest game in AFH history" comment. How many times does someone get into a conversation with someone where one person talks about what profession they're in and the other isn't asked about theirs or doesn't provide that information? Did Kurtis tell her what he does and then not ask what she does? I think a savvy recruiter would be a hell of a conversationalist and not go without asking that question. I was around her at my high school reunion. She wasn't shy about handing out business cards left and right saying she was an actress. Heck, one girl got her autograph. It goes without saying that she's certainly not shy.

[sys]

Ya, that's pretty insulting.  As if one of the marquee "bag men" in the NCAA is not going to get his stories lined up before he call Jason Witlock. GMAFB.

It's Kurtis fracking Townsend.  

the initial stories didn't match.  her first story was the "thanks to you-know-who..." tweet.  then she changed to match townsend.

[CNS]

"You-know-who" = not Townsend?

[Trim]

Ya, that's pretty insulting.  As if one of the marquee "bag men" in the NCAA is not going to get his stories lined up before he call Jason Witlock. GMAFB.

It's Kurtis fracking Townsend.  

the initial stories didn't match.  her first story was the "thanks to you-know-who..." tweet.  then she changed to match townsend.

"Thanks to you-know-who" wasn't her first story.  The first story was that Townsend straight hooked her up.  Then, after the shitstorm, she went with the you-know-who story thinking that would clear Townsend (in that Townsend gave the tickets to mysyouknowwho ignorant to who the eventual recipient would be).  Then after Townsend put his story out there, she reverted back to acknowledging the tix came direct from him.

[Dr Rick Daris]

Ya, that's pretty insulting.  As if one of the marquee "bag men" in the NCAA is not going to get his stories lined up before he call Jason Witlock. GMAFB.

It's Kurtis fracking Townsend.  

the initial stories didn't match.  her first story was the "thanks to you-know-who..." tweet.  then she changed to match townsend.

"Thanks to you-know-who" wasn't her first story.  The first story was that Townsend straight hooked her up.  Then, after the shitstorm, she went with the you-know-who story thinking that would clear Townsend (in that Townsend gave the tickets to mysyouknowwho ignorant to who the eventual recipient would be).  Then after Townsend put his story out there, she reverted back to acknowledging the tix came direct from him.

yeah. whitlocks article laid that out in an extremely obvious manner. doesn't stop them though.

[Trim]

Let's assume Townsend swapped tickets for sex (easy assumption).  Let's further assume she secretly taped it because porn people will do anything for publicity/money (not as easy, but somewhat easy assumption). 

What will the name of that eventual DVD release be?  What kind of acts of debauchery will be found on that DVD?  Photoshoppers?

[OregonSmock]

Just when you think KU can't get any more elite, something like this happens. 
 

[Trim]

Maybe Townsend donned the jayhawk mascot head during the act.