Dax is opening up a glenlivet 21 tonight. eff you, Midwest . eff you! I'm socially awkward because of you!
Dear Flying Spaghetti:
It’s me, your friend Dax, again.
I beseech thee in hope that it wasn’t drunk enraged WackyTuck causing all the vandalism in the Arrowhead Stadium parking lot.
If it was, please remind WackyTuck that it’s just the Chiefs and pro sports. Implore WackyTuck to seek solace in your warm tomato laden embrace next time he feels the need to lash out in rage when the Chiefs lose
Dax
PS I pray Mrs. WackyTuck wasn’t injured helping WackyTuck to the door this evening and that he’s peacefully sleeping it off and won’t call in sick on Monday.