A
new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
'Please note that this Bank
is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to
withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers
using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined
below when accessing their accounts.
After months of
careful research, MALE &FEMALE Procedures have been developed.
Please follow the Appropriate steps for your
gender.'
************ ********* *********
*
MALE
PROCEDURE:
1.
Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car
window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4.
Enter amount of cash required and withdraw..
5. Retrieve
card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive
off.
FEMALE
PROCEDURE:
What
is really funny is that most of this part is the
Truth!
1. Drive up to cash
machine.
2.. Reverse and back up the
required amount to align car window with the
machine... 3.
Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove
all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell
person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up..
6.
Attempt to insert card into machine...
7. Open car door to allow
easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the
car.
8.. Insert card...
9. Re-insert card the
right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your
PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter
PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13.
Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear
view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt..
16.
Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash
inside.
17. Write debit amount in check
register and place receipt in
back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive
forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash
machine..
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand
bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting
behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25.
Redial person on cell phone..
26. Drive for 2 to 3
miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
