AUCTION ITEM: I will review your personality and physical characteristics and select the perfect japanese shirt to be delivered to your door
AUCTION ITEM: I will review your criminal history and dome size and choose the perfect japanese hat to be delivered to the mouth of your cave
AUCTION ITEM: I will, without regard to anything specific about you personally, choose an assortment of japanese snacks and daiso ephemera filling a medium flat rate priority mail box to be delivered directly to your highway overpass