Author Topic: Coworker Battle To The Death! (Read 11274 times)

420seriouscat69 · « **on:** December 18, 2013, 11:25:23 AM »

So, this girl is on my last nerve. She's a 40 something, vegetarian (That eats buffalo meat), botox whore/slut, makes racial slurs at work, etc. She has been the top performer here the last three years and I'm starting to put some heat on her. Last week when I was scheduling a student on the phone, she screamed out that I was doing something wrong on the floor. I wasn't btw, but everyone was like "that's unprofessional!" Today I showed up and my student showed up today instead of our scheduled appointment for tomorrow. Guess who swooped in and stole my student? This bitch! What should I do? Put sugar in her gas tank, kill her with kindness, drag her down some steps....? Suggestions would be great! TIA!

michigancat · « **Reply #1 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:27:57 AM »

I like where you called her a whore/slut immediately before looking down on her for being a racist.

Asteriskhead · « **Reply #2 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:29:03 AM »

Quote from: michigancat on December 18, 2013, 11:27:57 AM

I like where you called her a whore/slut immediately before looking down on her for being a racist.

420seriouscat69 · « **Reply #3 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:30:32 AM »

It's in no particular order, dumbasses.

puniraptor · « **Reply #4 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:32:14 AM »

be professional in all interactions with her and that she can observe

go to your manager with your specific issues and be able to coherently and professionally expain them

its your manager's job to manage

also

create a bunch of fake student profiles and fill up her schedule with fake appointments from fake students

Emo EMAW · « **Reply #5 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:32:45 AM »

She probably feels bad for watching a lot of BBC porn.

pissclams · « **Reply #6 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:35:10 AM »

i would just explain to her that what she did was very unprofessional. let her know in simple but convincing terms that you don't expect to be treated this way and you aren't the type of person that she wants on her bad side.

^you might just write this down and read it to her verbatim.

OK_Cat · « **Reply #7 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:35:39 AM »

"don't stoop to her level"

Emo EMAW · « **Reply #8 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:36:00 AM »

Kill her.

420seriouscat69 · « **Reply #9 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:37:54 AM »

Good advice you guys. Thanks!

Boom Roasted · « **Reply #10 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:38:31 AM »

bang her

pissclams · « **Reply #11 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:38:56 AM »

Quote from: Boom Roasted on December 18, 2013, 11:38:31 AM

bang her

not a bad idea, i bet she's a slute.

michigancat · « **Reply #12 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:39:04 AM »

Quote from: WackySquawk08 on December 18, 2013, 11:30:32 AM

It's in no particular order, dumbasses.

The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep · « **Reply #13 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:39:55 AM »

bone her

EMAWican · « **Reply #14 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:41:56 AM »

Quote from: puniraptor on December 18, 2013, 11:32:14 AM

be professional in all interactions with her and that she can observe

go to your manager with your specific issues and be able to coherently and professionally expain them

Quote from: pissclams on December 18, 2013, 11:35:10 AM

i would just explain to her that what she did was very unprofessional. let her know in simple but convincing terms that you don't expect to be treated this way and you aren't the type of person that she wants on her bad side.

Do both.

If this fails: bang her, Battle Royale, Ro Shambo Bo, or any combination of the three.

michigancat · « **Reply #15 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:44:22 AM »

wacky's workplace would make a nice television show. It sounds kind of like a real-life Workaholics.

ChiComCat · « **Reply #16 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:48:07 AM »

I would like to see a workplace operate before Wackycat, during wackycat, and after wackycat. I'll bet it changes quite a bit.

The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep · « **Reply #17 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:49:39 AM »

puniraptor · « **Reply #18 on:** December 18, 2013, 11:59:37 AM »

maybe you could bang her and then knock her up and then fall in love and get married and she can be a stay at home mom while you bring home the bacon and she takes care of the little fanbino

(in no particular order)

420seriouscat69 · « **Reply #19 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:00:56 PM »

Quote from: michigancat on December 18, 2013, 11:44:22 AM

wacky's workplace would make a nice television show. It sounds kind of like a real-life Workaholics.

Love that show.

Mr Bread · « **Reply #20 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:01:54 PM »

Maybe stuff your balls way far into her mouth if she's into it. Or don't. Do whatever.

420seriouscat69 · « **Reply #21 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:03:20 PM »

Guys, I don't think banging her is the answer. I'm not saying my general hasn't been places that I've regretted, but in no way would I let this B have the satisfaction to be around it. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!!!!

The Big Train · « **Reply #22 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:05:47 PM »

Next time she brings in buffalo meat for lunch, switch it out with beef.

Mr Bread · « **Reply #23 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:07:45 PM »

Quote from: The Big Train on December 18, 2013, 12:05:47 PM

Next time she brings in buffalo meat for lunch, switch it out with beef.

You're talking about his penis aren't you. He already said he wasn't going to be giving her any of that. No VD for her this holiday season. Well maybe, but not from Fanman5000 that's for sure.

treysolid · « **Reply #24 on:** December 18, 2013, 12:08:11 PM »

yeah, have sex with her fanning! that'll put her in her place (and by "place", i mean the office kitchenette, where she should be making sandwiches for all the men in the office).