Author Topic: Temporary Bachelor (Read 2441 times)

bones129 · « **on:** July 05, 2013, 01:23:36 AM »

Damn. Mrs. Bones has to hit the road for a two week business trip in the fall. I can do laundry, but can't cook for crap and hate shopping. Besides eating out every night, any suggestions?

michigancat · « **Reply #1 on:** July 05, 2013, 01:39:54 AM »

Learning to cook and stopping whining about shopping could be some nice alternatives.

timhawk · « **Reply #2 on:** July 05, 2013, 06:03:50 AM »

Quote from: bones129 on July 05, 2013, 01:23:36 AM

Damn. Mrs. Bones has to hit the road for a two week business trip in the fall. I can do laundry, but can't cook for crap and hate shopping. Besides eating out every night, any suggestions?

get an escort

8manpick · « **Reply #3 on:** July 05, 2013, 08:12:21 AM »

Why would you need to shop?

wetwillie · « **Reply #4 on:** July 05, 2013, 09:26:38 AM »

The eff

Tobias · « **Reply #5 on:** July 05, 2013, 09:39:24 AM »

get pak'd and marathon some manly show

CNS · « **Reply #6 on:** July 05, 2013, 09:46:09 AM »

Kids? If not, jesus christ, what is this thread even about?

Pete · « **Reply #7 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:15:17 AM »

If you are in Joco, stop by the Culinary Center of Kansas City....they have partially prepared meals with easy instructions to follow.

KSUblumpkin · « **Reply #8 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:26:38 AM »

I've been gone all week on a staycation similar to this (there is no Mrs Blumpkin yet).

Here is a potential list of activities:

A) Pizza: it's great.

B) Que up the Netflix: enjoy some Sliders

C) Golf. Golfing it great. I actually improve the drunker I get. If you are cheap (like me) grab a disc golf and hit up a course.

D) Fish. See golf.

E) Since your wife is gone for two weeks, get in that much needed 'bating time. Let's face it...women are succubuses. Free yourself like Django from the shackles of vaginal oppression.

EMAWmeister · « **Reply #9 on:** July 05, 2013, 12:21:47 PM »

Quote from: KSUblumpkin on July 05, 2013, 11:26:38 AM

I've been gone all week on a staycation similar to this (there is no Mrs Blumpkin yet).

Here is a potential list of activities:

A) Pizza: it's great.

B) Que up the Netflix: enjoy some Sliders

C) Golf. Golfing it great. I actually improve the drunker I get. If you are cheap (like me) grab a disc golf and hit up a course.

D) Fish. See golf.

E) Since your wife is gone for two weeks, get in that much needed 'bating time. Let's face it...women are succubuses. Free yourself like Django from the shackles of vaginal oppression.

SdK · « **Reply #10 on:** July 05, 2013, 12:31:36 PM »

Do whatever you did before you were married.

deputy dawg · « **Reply #11 on:** July 05, 2013, 04:17:41 PM »

Quote from: EMAWmeister on July 05, 2013, 12:21:47 PM

Quote from: KSUblumpkin on July 05, 2013, 11:26:38 AM
I've been gone all week on a staycation similar to this (there is no Mrs Blumpkin yet).

Here is a potential list of activities:

A) Pizza: it's great.

B) Que up the Netflix: enjoy some Sliders

C) Golf. Golfing it great. I actually improve the drunker I get. If you are cheap (like me) grab a disc golf and hit up a course.

D) Fish. See golf.

E) Since your wife is gone for two weeks, get in that much needed 'bating time. Let's face it...women are succubuses. Free yourself like Django from the shackles of vaginal oppression.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Succubus

Quote

In folklore traced back to medieval legend, a succubus is a female demon or supernatural entity that appears in dreams, who takes the form of a human woman in order to seduce men, usually through sexual intercourse. The male counterpart is the incubus. Religious traditions hold that repeated intercourse with a succubus may result in the deterioration of health or even death.

Like learning new big words.

bones129 · « **Reply #12 on:** July 05, 2013, 10:32:07 PM »

This succubus business is making me paranoid.

Shacks · « **Reply #13 on:** July 05, 2013, 10:49:44 PM »

Start drinking at noon, play tons of video games (replace with Netflix marathons if vidya games aren't your thing), watch football all day on Saturday, eat a lot of junk food, go gambling

Basically all the fun crap you could do whenever you wanted while you were single

Kat Kid · « **Reply #14 on:** July 05, 2013, 10:56:05 PM »

This happens to me from time to time. Some recommendations from personal experience:

Do's:

Leave the house
Maybe take a walk to go hang out at your neighborhood bar and take a newspaper and just set up shop and shoot the crap like a regular
don't necessarily need to cook something great, make yourself some quality sandwiches or buy some good cheeses and crackers?

Don'ts:

Stay inside the entire time eating pizza (you will feel bad about yourself even if it seems like a good idea at the time)

michigancat · « **Reply #15 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:03:13 PM »

I go to lots of concerts and watch TV shows my wife doesn't like.

Dugout DickStone · « **Reply #16 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:18:18 PM »

Get ripped

SkinnyBenny · « **Reply #17 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:46:53 PM »

Quote from: Kat Kid on July 05, 2013, 10:56:05 PM

Don'ts:

Stay inside the entire time eating pizza (you will feel bad about yourself even if it seems like a good idea at the time)

Doing this right now while future Mrs. SB is in Alaska.

Pett · « **Reply #18 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:51:01 PM »

Quote from: bones129 on July 05, 2013, 01:23:36 AM

Damn. Mrs. Bones has to hit the road for a two week business trip in the fall. I can do laundry, but can't cook for crap and hate shopping. Besides eating out every night, any suggestions?

Did she mention anything about a hall pass?

NDSU Lollypopkid · « **Reply #19 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:54:43 PM »

Im sure Mrs Bones's boyfriend will take good care of her

bones129 · « **Reply #20 on:** July 05, 2013, 11:56:27 PM »

Quote from: Pett on July 05, 2013, 11:51:01 PM

Quote from: bones129 on July 05, 2013, 01:23:36 AM
Damn. Mrs. Bones has to hit the road for a two week business trip in the fall. I can do laundry, but can't cook for crap and hate shopping. Besides eating out every night, any suggestions?
Did she mention anything about a hall pass?

No. But good one nevertheless.

star seed 7 · « **Reply #21 on:** July 06, 2013, 12:01:28 AM »

Sounds like having a wife is awful.

bones129 · « **Reply #22 on:** July 06, 2013, 12:07:40 AM »

Quote from: NDSU Lollypopkid on July 05, 2013, 11:54:43 PM

Im sure Mrs Bones's boyfriend will take good care of her

She has no need for a boyfriend...there's a reason they call me Bones.

steve dave · « **Reply #23 on:** July 06, 2013, 12:08:50 AM »

get blasted and turntable

michigancat · « **Reply #24 on:** July 06, 2013, 12:10:00 AM »

Quote from: seven on July 06, 2013, 12:01:28 AM

Sounds like having a wife is awful.

I get tired of the concerts pretty quickly.