Defeating Bike Cops

[MooseTheDog]

This thread is designed to create an unbeatable plan for escaping bike cops. Let's face it, nobody wants to lose to a scrub cop that isn't even allowed to have a car.

Opening idea (please shoot down/indicate holes): Let bike cop walk up to car and he hopefully won't write down LPN yet because he trusts that you're stopping for him. Then when he pedals up on his little trike, throw your stud car in speedy reverse mode because KS doesn't have front LPNs and he can't read it. Whip around 180 once he is out of LPN reading range.

Note: this plan is designed only for beating bike cops in states where you can sport a cool/unique front plate w/o LPN (aka not Missouri)

[steve dave]

how do you know if they are trying to pull you over? like, waving their hands or something? just pretend you can't see them and drive away at normal car speed.

[pissclams]

i call it the Tack Track.  basically a box underneath the back of my car that holds 2,000 tacks.  when the bike cop is pursuing me, i press a button on my dash and the box releases the tacks and flatten the bike's tires. 

i also have the oil slick option installed as well which works reasonably well when called upon

[Dugout DickStone]

up steep hills

[asava]

the best escape would be to beat them at their own game: on a bike.

[The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep]

hire trim

[Tobias]

moose is really hitting his stride in this internship

[Asteriskhead]

hire trim

Not that kind of lolyer.

[Institutional Control]

I would install a device that hides your plate at the flip of switch.  Too many factors involved to successfully complete a reverse get-away 100% of the time.

[puniraptor]

you could never escape a bike cop in your car. your only hope is to bail and hop a fence or ford a stream.

[Pete]

True bike cop  story:

The morning after the first Fatty Fest, I was pulled over by a bike cop in Aggieville for talking on my cell phone when driving.  He let me off with a warning! 

[Trim]

True bike cop  story:

The morning after the first Fatty Fest, I was pulled over by a bike cop in Aggieville for talking on my cell phone when driving.  He let me off with a warning! 

I think I was talking to you!

[Winters]

banana peel

[MooseTheDog]

how do you know if they are trying to pull you over? like, waving their hands or something? just pretend you can't see them and drive away at normal car speed.

Don't try to pull that one, I've tried it. Apparently they "hear that crap every day".

[ChiComCat]

Don't make the illegal left turn leaving Aggieville (only place I've ever seen the bike cop).

[The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep]

moose, is your 'ship in manhattan? is this where you got hosed by super-toned-calf bike cop?

[Cartierfor3]

I bet the cop would be pretty nice if you complimented his sweet bike and awesome bike accessories

[mocat]

sophomore year i was tailgating with some bros before a FB game (age 19) and pounding beers in solo cups. saw a bike cop approaching and immediately dumped and dropped solo cup. one of the bros did not see it coming and got MIP'd

[MooseTheDog]

moose is really hitting his stride in this internship

Thanks Tobias. I'm thinking about asking for a raise actually.   

[Cartierfor3]

sophomore year i was tailgating with some bros before a FB game (age 19) and pounding beers in solo cups. saw a bike cop approaching and immediately dumped and dropped solo cup. one of the bros did not see it coming and got MIP'd

Man you left your bro hanging bigtime mocat.

[MooseTheDog]

moose, is your 'ship in manhattan? is this where you got hosed by super-toned-calf bike cop?

No but I'm living in manhattan and I have been since 2000 so I've been seeing citizens get worked by those cankle-y bastards since I was a baby Moosedog.

[Asteriskhead]

how do you know if they are trying to pull you over? like, waving their hands or something? just pretend you can't see them and drive away at normal car speed.

Don't try to pull that one, I've tried it. Apparently they "hear that crap every day".

It's worth it, the day you get all greens and continue on your merry way down Bluemont and left on to TCB will be like giftmas morning as a five year old.

[Stevesie60]

Sometimes they hang out in front of a parked car (so you can't see them) right in front of a stop sign. When you stop there, they see if you're wearing your seatbelt.

Do they have radios? Like, if they start chasing you can they still radio in for back-up? If so, how much time do you have before back-up arrives?

[Asteriskhead]

Sometimes they hang out in front of a parked car (so you can't see them) right in front of a stop sign. When you stop there, they see if you're wearing your seatbelt.

Do they have radios? Like, if they start chasing you can they still radio in for back-up? If so, how much time do you have before back-up arrives?

Yes, they have radios. The second part of your question depends on where the other piglets are currently sucking down coffee and harassing minorities.

[Super PurpleCat]

Push button smokescreen.  Or just drive a piece of crap car that belches smoke.