Author Topic: ATTENTION CREDIBLE PROTESTANT FAITH HEALERS: CK SPAGHETTI BRAINS RELATED THREAD  (Read 27508 times)

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Offline Pete

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I did some research, and while there is loads of information out there about how to diagnose concussions and about their impact (see below), there is little or no consensus in the medical community about how to speed the recovery from concussions...they seems to suggest that merely time will heal this wound.

Unacceptable.

We need to get this rough rider turned over to the Lord, ASAP.  There is no better way to turn an injury over to the Lord than through the employ of a credible faith healer.  This can be accomplished in a number of ways; laying of hands; snakes; incantations, etc.  The more the better, IMO.

Basically, here is how this works:

Step 1:  Faith heal the crap out of Collin

Step 2:  Collin gains confidence, loses anxiety about the injury, vis-a-vis the holy spirit ("holy ghost")

Step 3:  Test cool cucumber Collin Klein on any number of concussion symptom examinations, which he will rough ridin' nail

Step 4: Crush TCU

Look, we know that there are a ton of athletic department types who read this board.  My hope is that they review this plan and understand its basically our best (only?) option for beating TCU. 



http://www.centerforbrainhealth.net/Assessment%20Services/concussion.html

Quote
FACTS about sports concussion...

1. Twenty percent of all concussions are sports-related

2. A concussion doesn’t always knock you out

3. Having one concussion increases your chances of having another

4. Symptoms of a concussion can last hours, days, weeks, months, or indefinitely

5. Concussion can cause disability affecting school, work, and social life

6. Returning to contact or collision sports before you have completely recovered from a concussion may lead to more serious injury and can increase your chances of long-term problems

Quote
When it is safe to return to play after concussion?

There are several guidelines for return to play after concussion.  All of these share some common principles:

1. An athlete who has suffered a concussion should be removed from competition immediately and monitored for post-concussion symptoms

2. An athlete should not return to play before he or she is completely symptom-free at rest and after exertion for a specified period of time, which varies based on the athlete’s history and the severity of the concussion.

3. Athletes who have a history of one or more previous concussions should be treated more cautiously (not returned to play as quickly) than those who have suffered their first concussion

4. When in doubt, sit them out!

Quote
How can you tell when an athlete is symptom free?

An athlete should only return to competition when it is clear that there are no lingering symptoms of concussion.  Unfortunately, because concussion is an invisible injury, and because athletes may minimize or not recognize persistent post-concussion, symptoms, this can be a tricky matter.  Also, symptoms may sometimes go away, only to come back after physical or mental exertion.

Most often, return to play decisions are made without the benefit of neuropsychological testing and are based on observation and player report of symptoms. Neuropsychological testing provides the coach or team physician with information that can help to take the guesswork out of concussion management and return-to-play decisions. Using a battery of tests of memory, reaction time & processing speed, we can provide specific information regarding the severity of injury and a standard for evaluating recovery from injury. It is of benefit for athletes to receive baseline assessment prior to or at the beginning of the athletic season to allow for within-subjects analysis of scores following an injury.


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Offline puniraptor

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I'm pretty sure I already faith healed his concussion using remote psychic surgery.

Offline Pendergast

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LOL at Bill giving a eff if he has a concussion.

Offline Pete

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LOL at Bill giving a eff if he has a concussion.

Are you familiar with Matt Miller's story at all?

Offline Pendergast

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LOL at Bill giving a eff if he has a concussion.

Are you familiar with Matt Miller's story at all?

 :dubious:

Offline goCats101

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What happened with Miller?

Offline yoEMAW

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I would score in the 99 percentile for any concussion test and you can too. It's easy really.

Collin, if you're reading this, commit these words to memory:

Apple
Elbow
Saddle
Bubble

Offline 0.42

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thread title should win a csourky going away

Offline Pete

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What happened with Miller?

Post concussion stuff, sad deal.  Snyder is probably one of his biggest supporters, some say as a result of the guilt associated with being partially responsible for it.  Let's just say that this is not Snyder's first spaghetti brained quarterback rodeo.


Snyder is like in love and stuff with CK.  I have never, ever seen a Snyder QB get his helmet taken away.  For example, Evridge was basically murdered to death at Tech, Justin Evans is being told to warm up because Evridge is dying from a brain melting concussion, and Snyder leaves Evridge in there. 


Offline Pete

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Seriously, has a KSU quarterback ever had their helmet taken away before?  I got nothing...

Offline Pendergast

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Ell could have played way earlier than he did.

Offline DeVere Kalmar

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Who the eff is Justin Evans?

Offline SkinnyBenny

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What happened with Miller?

Post concussion stuff, sad deal.
Snyder is probably one of his biggest supporters, some say as a result of the guilt associated with being partially responsible for it.  Let's just say that this is not Snyder's first spaghetti brained quarterback rodeo.


Snyder is like in love and stuff with CK.  I have never, ever seen a Snyder QB get his helmet taken away.  For example, Evridge was basically murdered to death at Tech, Justin Evans is being told to warm up because Evridge is dying from a brain melting concussion, and Snyder leaves Evridge in there.


pm
"walking around mhk and crying in the rain because of love lost is the absolute purest and best thing in the world.  i hope i fall in love during the next few weeks and get my heart broken and it starts raining just to experience it one last time."   --Dlew12

Offline shivvyman

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What concussion? I thought he had a sprained wrist.......

Offline ChiComCat

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Do really poorly on your baseline testing and then the post-concussion stuff is no big deal

Offline Pete

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Who the eff is Justin Evans?

You almost found out!

Offline Pete

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Do really poorly on your baseline testing and then the post-concussion stuff is no big deal

I rough ridin' wish.  Home schooled mandolin champs don't play rope a dope with brain tests.  Next idea...

Offline Pendergast

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Snyder says the injury occurred on a passing play, and I don't remember a bad sack.  So it seems a concussion is not necessarily the injury.

Offline Pete

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ATTENTION CREDIBLE PROTESTANT FAITH HEALERS: CK SPAGHETTI BRAINS RELATED THREAD
« Reply #18 on: November 04, 2012, 11:13:16 AM »
RT @davidubben Lots of folks tweeting me about an arm/wrist injury for Klein. Guys with hurt arms/wrists don't clap and don't have helmets taken away.

Offline Pendergast

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RT @davidubben Lots of folks tweeting me about an arm/wrist injury for Klein. Guys with hurt arms/wrists don't clap and don't have helmets taken away.

Touche.  When did he hit his head on a pass play?  Did Bill scheme the media?

Quote from: Ubbs recap of the game
"Well, he got hurt on a pass, so if you can't run it and you can't throw it, well, you don't have much left," Snyder said.
« Last Edit: November 04, 2012, 11:22:07 AM by Pendergast »

catzacker

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I guess I'd just point Bill to goals #1 - Committment, #5 - Be Tough, and #12 - No Self Limitations. Quit shitting all over your goals and play CK.   Matt Miller should've probably not done so much coke. 

Offline JohnCurrie is Weird/Gross

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Do home schoolers get different concussion tests?

catzacker

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Also, Tannahill had to be helped off the goddman field because he got his head hit so goddamn hard, but Bill ran his ass back out there. 


Offline steve dave

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He took the shot to the head two plays before he scored the TD

Offline steve dave

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Snyder says the injury occurred on a passing play, and I don't remember a bad sack.  So it seems a concussion is not necessarily the injury.

it is a concussion