Author Topic: Amazing feats that no one else witnessed (so feel free to exaggerate) (Read 4536 times)

Emo EMAW · « **on:** October 08, 2012, 04:10:55 PM »

Growing up I played a sport where you use your feet a lot. I'm talking from like 3 years old all the way though HS and then some club stuff at K-State. As I'm sure other people that played this sport will attest, I have this instinct that when I drop something I use my feet to soften the landing. So like drop a cell phone, foot moves underneath phone and cradles it before impact. Drop a baby, ya I'm on that too. They never get hurt.

Anyway this weekend I was cutting up some avocados for my famous Emo EMAW tangy spicy orgasmic guacamole. As I was removing the pit from one avocado I lost my grip on the knife and it started to fall. I was barefoot and the knife fell blade down. My instincts overrode all logic and....get this....I caught the knife between my toes! Like on the blade!

j-von · « **Reply #1 on:** October 08, 2012, 04:37:57 PM »

Holy crap, that is pretty impressive. I do the same thing with my feet, especially after I started playing that sport. It doesn't matter whether it weighs 100 pounds, my foot is going to try to soften the landing which has led to a bruised foot a few times but has saved me quite a few times as well.

I don't have anything that exciting, but I used to work at Colbert and was on the driving range by myself. Hit a 3 iron and killed a bird probably 30 feet in front of me. Took the Gator down to investigate and sure enough there it was. Nobody believed me.

Mr Bread · « **Reply #2 on:** October 08, 2012, 04:46:26 PM »

Yeah, I got really into that sport too. Then I started to notice dongs more and appreciate them for their respective veinieness and rigidity. I also started to like America less around that time. :kstatemaskfive:

jtksu · « **Reply #3 on:** October 08, 2012, 04:48:46 PM »

I have the quickest hands on earth. I am forever catching stuff before it hits the ground and often times it would be amazing if someone ever actually saw it.

CNS · « **Reply #4 on:** October 08, 2012, 04:51:50 PM »

Quote from: jtksu on October 08, 2012, 04:48:46 PM

I have the quickest hands on earth. I am forever catching stuff before it hits the ground and often times it would be amazing if someone ever actually saw it.

I do this a lot too. Probs is, my wife sees it all the time. I will catch something ridiculously crazy, impress the crap out of my self, ask her "Did you see that catch", and she completely "Meh"s me.

Can we include completely unappreciated stuff in this thread too?

WillieWatanabe · « **Reply #5 on:** October 08, 2012, 04:53:15 PM »

I am a very good first timer. People usually don't believe i've never done something before.

Emo EMAW · « **Reply #6 on:** October 08, 2012, 05:01:07 PM »

Quote from: CNS Casey on October 08, 2012, 04:51:50 PM

Quote from: jtksu on October 08, 2012, 04:48:46 PM
I have the quickest hands on earth. I am forever catching stuff before it hits the ground and often times it would be amazing if someone ever actually saw it.

I do this a lot too. Probs is, my wife sees it all the time. I will catch something ridiculously crazy, impress the crap out of my self, ask her "Did you see that catch", and she completely "Meh"s me.

Can we include completely unappreciated stuff in this thread too?

Hey CNS Casey,

To me, amazing is amazing. And the reason your wife is busting your balls is because if you realize how awesome you are then you might just dump her and date Scarlett Johansson and Halle Berry. So post away my good man.

Emo EMAW

CNS · « **Reply #7 on:** October 08, 2012, 05:22:22 PM »

Oh man! This feels great.

Pete · « **Reply #8 on:** October 08, 2012, 06:37:52 PM »

Quote from: Mr Bread on October 08, 2012, 04:46:26 PM

Yeah, I got really into that sport too. Then I started to notice dongs more and appreciate them for their respective veinieness and rigidity. I also started to like America less around that time. :kstatemaskfive:

Bloodfart · « **Reply #9 on:** October 08, 2012, 09:34:24 PM »

This one time I tackled a 500 lb steer. Dad told me to put him in the catch pen to take it to the butcher. I was getting kinda frustrated after the 5th or 6th attempt so I took out after it. I visualized where it was going to run and took off for that point. I hit it broad side with my shoulder and he fell over and skidded accross the cement lot.

pissclams · « **Reply #10 on:** October 08, 2012, 09:42:03 PM »

Quote from: Bloodfart on October 08, 2012, 09:34:24 PM

This one time I tackled a 500 lb steer. Dad told me to put him in the catch pen to take it to the butcher. I was getting kinda frustrated after the 5th or 6th attempt so I took out after it. I visualized where it was going to run and took off for that point. I hit it broad side with my shoulder and he fell over and skidded accross the cement lot.

why do they call cow skin "leather"?

Bloodfart · « **Reply #11 on:** October 08, 2012, 09:47:21 PM »

Quote from: pissclams on October 08, 2012, 09:42:03 PM

Quote from: Bloodfart on October 08, 2012, 09:34:24 PM
This one time I tackled a 500 lb steer. Dad told me to put him in the catch pen to take it to the butcher. I was getting kinda frustrated after the 5th or 6th attempt so I took out after it. I visualized where it was going to run and took off for that point. I hit it broad side with my shoulder and he fell over and skidded accross the cement lot.
why do they call cow skin "leather"?

I don't know but I sure tanned that steers' hide. amirite.

pissclams · « **Reply #12 on:** October 08, 2012, 09:50:11 PM »

sounds like it

one time gella · « **Reply #13 on:** October 08, 2012, 10:53:43 PM »

I've pissed on that big ball of twine, in the worlds largest hand dug well (pre tornado), the tri-state point of KS, CO & NE, and near that big Brutus thing...

ksucrcoop · « **Reply #14 on:** October 09, 2012, 10:13:27 AM »

When I was younger I broke my ankle playing backyard football with a few of my buddies. It was a bad break, one of those injuries where everyone around you can feel your anguish as you writhe about in pain. The doctors said that because I was so young, they were able to restructure my ankle and tendons to be even stronger than before. As it turned out MUCH stronger. It was soon after my cast came off that began to notice I could kick things really hard. In fact, while testing my reflexes in the doctor's office I accidentally kicked him in the balls so hard he can't father children anymore (it was funny at the time). Long story short, I discovered I had a knack for kicking field goals, despite my young age and short stature, and signed a long term contract with a Canadian Football team. The locker room was kind of weird, my mom started dating one of the players and I learned to treasure my friends more than fame or fortune. As with most things in life, my talent for kicking the crap out of stuff began to fade. However, it faded as quickly as it came and i was out of professional football after just one season. I haven't kicked anything for years now.

Bloodfart · « **Reply #15 on:** October 09, 2012, 10:18:36 AM »

Lol

OK_Cat · « **Reply #16 on:** October 09, 2012, 10:24:38 AM »

i'm very talented at being observant. when i walk into a room i immediately know where all of the exits are, where people are located, and any interesting landmarks.

i feel like i'd be a really good criminal in that aspect.

Ghost of Stan Parrish · « **Reply #17 on:** October 11, 2012, 01:24:07 PM »

Well, insofar as anyone on this board knows, I haven't not dated Miss California 2007, Miss Teen Maine 2004, a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, a tv news reporter, an MLB star's ex, and some other minor actresses, models and whatnot...

steve dave · « **Reply #18 on:** October 11, 2012, 01:29:28 PM »

once hit three half court shots within the span of about 30 minutes in roughly 5th grade

The1BigWillie · « **Reply #19 on:** October 11, 2012, 01:59:01 PM »

When I was like 27 or so I beat it

like 7 times in one night.

Mr Bread · « **Reply #20 on:** October 11, 2012, 02:19:30 PM »

Pissclams was right about the non-posting The1BigWillie being way rough ridin' better.

puniraptor · « **Reply #21 on:** October 11, 2012, 04:31:07 PM »

Quote from: The1BigWillie on October 11, 2012, 01:59:01 PM

When I was like 27 or so I beat it like 7 times in one night.

EuroCat · « **Reply #22 on:** October 11, 2012, 04:36:14 PM »

Quote from: ksucrcoop on October 09, 2012, 10:13:27 AM

When I was younger I broke my ankle playing backyard football with a few of my buddies. It was a bad break, one of those injuries where everyone around you can feel your anguish as you writhe about in pain. The doctors said that because I was so young, they were able to restructure my ankle and tendons to be even stronger than before. As it turned out MUCH stronger. It was soon after my cast came off that began to notice I could kick things really hard. In fact, while testing my reflexes in the doctor's office I accidentally kicked him in the balls so hard he can't father children anymore (it was funny at the time). Long story short, I discovered I had a knack for kicking field goals, despite my young age and short stature, and signed a long term contract with a Canadian Football team. The locker room was kind of weird, my mom started dating one of the players and I learned to treasure my friends more than fame or fortune. As with most things in life, my talent for kicking the crap out of stuff began to fade. However, it faded as quickly as it came and i was out of professional football after just one season. I haven't kicked anything for years now.

You are special. Don't ever forget that.

Stevesie60 · « **Reply #23 on:** October 11, 2012, 07:27:06 PM »

Quote from: steve dave on October 11, 2012, 01:29:28 PM

once hit three half court shots within the span of about 30 minutes in roughly 5th grade

One time in 6th grade I kicked a basketball up into all the pipes and vents and stuff in the gym. It bounced around for a while and came down a swished in the basket right next to me. Someone saw it though.

chum1 · « **Reply #24 on:** October 11, 2012, 07:46:15 PM »

One time when I was in high school, I stepped into an elevator, bent over, and stuck my head in between the doors as they were closing. God, that hurt. It was not amazing. Plus, there were other people there who saw it.