Attn USC fan(s): What the eff does your school have to offer?

[ednksu]

I hope the 10s of you know something about basketball.  What can your school offer?  To my understanding you have been to the dance as many times as we've been to Sweeet 16s or Elite 8s, is that correct?  What are your training facilities like?  Do you have a sign up sheet at the local YMCA to get court time?  Do you have to serve meals for the football and baseball team banquets?

[kim carnes]

 

[jaa1025]

They have an Athletic Department void of John Currie.

[bored..]

They have an Athletic Department void of John Currie.

this and a school that is closer to Miamai...bet he gives sc the same loyalty bs we got.

[Gamechicken]

Off the top of my head:

1. more money
2. a fairly new arena
3. an AD who doesn't suck
4. carte blanche for 1-2 years because we all care about football and baseball more
5. beaches
6. fewer farmers
7. non-frigid and depressing winters
8. more interesting mascot
9. hotter coeds

[Dugout DickStone]

Off the top of my head:

1. more money
2. a fairly new arena
3. an AD who doesn't suck
4. carte blanche for 1-2 years because we all care about football and baseball more
5. beaches
6. fewer farmers
7. non-frigid and depressing winters
8. more interesting mascot
9. hotter coeds

USC chicks are pigs.  Otherwise, pretty close to right.  Add "more racists" and the list is good.

[USC Alum]

No more this...

[Gamechicken]

Off the top of my head:

1. more money
2. a fairly new arena
3. an AD who doesn't suck
4. carte blanche for 1-2 years because we all care about football and baseball more
5. beaches
6. fewer farmers
7. non-frigid and depressing winters
8. more interesting mascot
9. hotter coeds

USC chicks are pigs.  Otherwise, pretty close to right.  Add "more racists" and the list is good.

You're thinking of Clemson girls.  Throwing that racist word around again...SMH.

[EMAWzified]

1. more money (not really)
2. a fairly new arena (that you never fill)
3. an AD who doesn't suck (things change)
4. carte blanche for 1-2 years because we all care about football and baseball more (baseball? Really? Frank, you loser they care more about baseball)
5. beaches (so what)
6. fewer farmers (and a hell of a lot more racist, rednecks)
7. non-frigid and depressing winters (we play basketball indoors)
8. more interesting mascot (a homage to chicken fighting)
9. hotter coeds (hit it Frank)

[the KHAN!]

Off the top of my head:

1. Financially irresponsible
2. a fairly empty (spacious) arena
3. an AD who isn't Currie, but still takes Currieesque actions
4. Ability to commit murder on the court, there will be no witnesses
5. Hurricanes
6. zero infrastructure
7. depressing history of racism. Kind of like winter. Speaking of winter, snow is white, we hate none whites.
8. a mascot
9. coeds with fewer teeth to ease in the fellatio we will force on you. (rape)

FYP

[USC Alum]

A town that's premiere eating establishment isn't Applebees and where people buy their Winter wardrobes at places other than Wal-Mart.

[EMAWzified]

What the eff dude, is the Klan meeting over?

[the KHAN!]

A town that's premiere eating establishment isn't Applebees and where people buy their Winter wardrobes at places other than Wal-Mart.

The best part is you live here.

[puniraptor]

A town that's premiere eating establishment isn't Applebees and where people buy their Winter wardrobes at places other than Wal-Mart.

CREDIBILITY DESTROYED.

[USC Alum]

A town that's premiere eating establishment isn't Applebees and where people buy their Winter wardrobes at places other than Wal-Mart.

The best part is you live here.

Unfortunately, at least its not JC. But hey the one nice thing about Manhattan is that its within easy driving distance of Topeka...oh but wait...its Topeka.

[ChiComCat]

The correct and only necessary answer is: Not Currie

[_33]

Waves towels during Sandstorm   

[Gamechicken]

Off the top of my head:

1. Financially irresponsible
2. a fairly empty (spacious) arena
3. an AD who isn't Currie, but still takes Currieesque actions
4. Ability to commit murder on the court, there will be no witnesses
5. Hurricanes
6. zero infrastructure
7. depressing history of racism. Kind of like winter. Speaking of winter, snow is white, we hate none whites.
8. a mascot
9. coeds with fewer teeth to ease in the fellatio we will force on you. (rape)

FYP

Not financially irresponsible when you have the cash.

The arena has been full before.  We just hated Horn.

Hurricanes only really affect the SC coast.  Columbia is in the middle of the state.  Geography much?

zero infrastructure?  what do you think we ride around on dirt roads and have ferries to get us across rivers b/c we can't build bridges?

Racism...you act like we started the civil war or something.

[the KHAN!]

Wait wait...I am ignorant of geography because I said you get hurricanes and those only affect the coast...yet you list "beach" as something you have to offer.

Christ, you are awful.

[USC Alum]

Wait wait...I am ignorant of geography because I said you get hurricanes and those only affect the coast...yet you list "beach" as something you have to offer.

Christ, you are awful.

Please forgive me fellow USC fan, you see he was under the impression that you're ignorant of geography because you happen to think that Kansas is an appealing place to live while, in fact, it is not.

[the KHAN!]

Wait wait...I am ignorant of geography because I said you get hurricanes and those only affect the coast...yet you list "beach" as something you have to offer.

Christ, you are awful.

Please forgive me fellow USC fan, you see he was under the impression that you're ignorant of geography because you happen to think that Kansas is an appealing place to live while, in fact, it is not.

I don't think that's what he meant. I don't think that's what he meant at all.

[USC Alum]

SC has zero infrastructure? That's hilarious coming from a Kansan.

[the KHAN!]

I can see why you hate us for Reconstruction. You are obviously still feeling the effects. T's&P's.

[Co-ckhornleghorn]

You guys are pretty funny on this board so I'll take everything tongue in cheek.

USC has...

1) A campus in the heart of the largest city and MSA in SC (~800,000) and a very diverse population
2) Over 30,000 students
3) A football stadium 60% bigger than yours
4) A basketball arena almost 50% larger than yours
5) Proximity to major metropolitan areas (Atlanta - 3 hours, Charlotte a little over an hour). A little over an hour by plane to NYC
6) SEC money
7) Great coaches in the other 3 major sports
8) Loyal fans
9) Great nearby outdoor activities (national park 20 miles from downtown Columbia, 3 rivers and a large lake close to downtown, mountains and beaches both within 2 hours)

What we don't have:

A great winning sports tradition except in baseball. We do have a growing tradition in football and women's basketball and we had excellent teams in men's basketball for a brief period of time in the late 60's and early 70's. I'm sure you'll look at last season's basketball attendance and say that we don't support the program, but you can't imagine how much our last coach alienated the fan base and sucked as a coach. I've only missed about a dozen home basketball games in the last 30 years and I'm thrilled to have Frank Martin as our new coach. It has nothing to do with anything against Kansas State. I hope the racist/klan comments are made tongue in cheek because South Carolina is not what is seen on the news, especially the City of Columbia. Besides, doesn't Kansas have Fred Phelps? As a matter of fact, Columbia is one of the top ten metros for African-American in migration in the country.

You guys will hire a great coach and your program will be fine. Good luck in the future.

[USC Alum]

Remember the last time K-State won a National Championship? ...oh wait

But at least they were decent in Football last year! (.439 overall)

Hey come on they're good in their main sport Basketball! They're like, the best team in their state....ouch.