Author Topic: If I Lived In NYC (Read 3239 times)

steve dave · « **on:** June 22, 2011, 03:32:15 PM »

I'd be a NY Post guy. I'm not afraid to say it.

wetwillie · « **Reply #1 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:33:59 PM »

Paul Moscow bait thread?

steve dave · « **Reply #2 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:35:04 PM »

I would also play up the fact that I was from KS and was raised on a cattle ranch to the delight of my peers. I would ham this up a lot and make young sd sound like quite the hick.

steve dave · « **Reply #3 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:37:46 PM »

I would initially plan on participating in tons of NYC hipster stuff and go to indy concerts constantly. And I would, for awhile. Later I would fall into a routine and the idea of travelling more than 3 subway stops from my apartment would feel like a chore. I would try to hide this from my friends back in KS and pretend that I constantly went to all the hip places and events.

felix rex · « **Reply #4 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:39:10 PM »

Quote from: steve dave on June 22, 2011, 03:35:04 PM

I would also play up the fact that I was from KS and was raised on a cattle ranch to the delight of my peers. I would ham this up a lot and make young sd sound like quite the hick.

This is a big hit in most population centers DC and North. Be sure to use lots of colloquialisms from your grandpa to explain your business strategies. "Cows don't know its Christmas!"

Dugout DickStone · « **Reply #5 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:39:38 PM »

Quote from: steve dave on June 22, 2011, 03:35:04 PM

I would also play up the fact that I was from KS and was raised on a cattle ranch to the delight of my peers. I would ham this up a lot and make young sd sound like quite the hick.

This works in all major east coast cities.

felix rex · « **Reply #6 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:40:52 PM »

I would pretend to know all the trendy "underground" places to eat when people "back home" asked and I would make fun of them for going to "touristy" areas, but secretly I would just eat at Five Guys a lot and ask my hipster friends for tips when people came to me for advice.

steve dave · « **Reply #7 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:41:11 PM »

I would dress much better than I currently do

Saulbadguy · « **Reply #8 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:44:21 PM »

Buy a car and park it in a parking garage that charges a monthly rate.

felix rex · « **Reply #9 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:46:41 PM »

Complain about tourists in the summer and secretly hate any other person from rural America who infiltrated my group until we eventually became good buddies.

Dugout DickStone · « **Reply #10 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:48:29 PM »

Call it "The City"

CNS · « **Reply #11 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:48:59 PM »

Quote from: Limestone on June 22, 2011, 03:48:29 PM

Call it "The City"

And refer to the people as "you city folk" when talking about how different they are.

sys · « **Reply #12 on:** June 22, 2011, 03:49:44 PM »

Quote from: steve dave on June 22, 2011, 03:35:04 PM

I would also play up the fact that I was from KS and was raised on a cattle ranch to the delight of my peers.

dunno why you ever left, or want to vacay off-ranch.

michigancat · « **Reply #13 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:04:26 PM »

I would instantly refer to NYC as "my city" and consider myself a "New Yorker".

felix rex · « **Reply #14 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:12:43 PM »

Quote from: sys on June 22, 2011, 03:49:44 PM

Quote from: steve dave on June 22, 2011, 03:35:04 PM
I would also play up the fact that I was from KS and was raised on a cattle ranch to the delight of my peers.

dunno why you ever left, or want to vacay off-ranch.

Quote from: partner at first lawfirm I worked at

You dumbass. You realize most of us are saving money to move to the ranch, right? And you moved your stupid broke ass away from it.

OK_Cat · « **Reply #15 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:14:29 PM »

i love it when i'm in nyc/boston/elsewhere and people ask me about oklahoma. i feed them some bullcrap about how we still have teepees and just got dial-up about a year ago.

WillieWatanabe · « **Reply #16 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:14:37 PM »

would become a Yankee fan. eff the mets.

michigancat · « **Reply #17 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:21:23 PM »

I would make my midwestern friends guess how much I pay in rent for my studio apartment.

chum1 · « **Reply #18 on:** June 22, 2011, 04:21:43 PM »

i would go see the statue of liberty. and then that haunted building in ghostbusters.

Stupid Fitz · « **Reply #19 on:** June 22, 2011, 05:43:33 PM »

Quote from: OK_Cat on June 22, 2011, 04:14:29 PM

i love it when i'm in nyc/boston/elsewhere and people ask me about oklahoma. i feed them some bullcrap about how we still have teepees and just got dial-up about a year ago.

Love this too. When NYers ask me where I am from and I say KS, I am immediately the most interesting person ever (this is usually the case anyway, so I am used to it) and I could tell them anything. Told someone I lived on an ant farm once and he said how weird that must have been growing up. NYers are pretty stupid people really.

steve dave · « **Reply #20 on:** June 22, 2011, 06:08:57 PM »

Quote from: michigancat on June 22, 2011, 04:21:23 PM

I would make my midwestern friends guess how much I pay in rent for my studio apartment.

good one

felix rex · « **Reply #21 on:** June 22, 2011, 06:44:37 PM »

I'd constantly talk about traffic and how there isn't any "real traffic" in the Midwest unless there's a combine blocking the road.

Stupid Fitz · « **Reply #22 on:** June 22, 2011, 06:48:35 PM »

I would laugh at everyone when they say they are going to Times Square. I would also talk about "the Village" a lot.

chum1 · « **Reply #23 on:** June 22, 2011, 07:03:15 PM »

http://mobile.nytimes.com/2011/06/19/realestate/more-parents-buying-apartments-for-their-children.xml

Stevesie60 · « **Reply #24 on:** June 22, 2011, 08:57:20 PM »

Quote from: Stupid Fitz on June 22, 2011, 05:43:33 PM

Quote from: OK_Cat on June 22, 2011, 04:14:29 PM
i love it when i'm in nyc/boston/elsewhere and people ask me about oklahoma. i feed them some bullcrap about how we still have teepees and just got dial-up about a year ago.

Love this too. When NYers ask me where I am from and I say KS, I am immediately the most interesting person ever (this is usually the case anyway, so I am used to it) and I could tell them anything. Told someone I lived on an ant farm once and he said how weird that must have been growing up. NYers are pretty stupid people really.

Convinced some people once that all of Kansas' civilization is underground because of all the tornadoes.