Umbrella's

[CNS]

I have lost every umbrella I have bought.

My wife takes mine and never returns them.  She has no fewer than 5 in her car right now. 

[Matt Siebrant's Left Hand]

Absolutely! In fact umbrella's are a great way to meet women.

Scenario: It's raining, you have an umbrella, a lovely looking philly does not. You go over to share your umbrella, start a conversation and the rest is history. At least that's the story behind me and my wife who has fired out 3 of the most beautiful children on this planet.
 

[EMAWmeister]

Absolutely! In fact umbrella's are a great way to meet women.

Scenario: It's raining, you have an umbrella, a lovely looking philly does not. You go over to share your umbrella, start a conversation and the rest is history. At least that's the story behind me and my wife who has fired out 3 of the most beautiful children on this planet.
 

Thank God your wife is pro-life.

The only time I've ever used an umbrella was when it was hurricane esque rains before a night time math test last month.  The only one I could find was my sister's Lilly P one (wtf was it doing in my house?) but I decided that I didn't want to be wet at all during the test.

Caught a lotta flack from a sopping wet red headed douche bag.  Looked at him and say "I'm dryer than you, [redacted]" 

[steve dave]

I have lost every umbrella I have bought.

prob b/c you're a piece of crap loser.

what on earth