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General Discussion => Essentially Flyertalk => Topic started by: asava on March 09, 2010, 11:27:15 PM

Title: My New Neighbor is a Cop *UPDATE EDITION
Post by: asava on March 09, 2010, 11:27:15 PM
Should I be worried? Also I am pretty sure he is a K-9 unit. Anybody have any prior knowledge on this type of situation?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on March 09, 2010, 11:29:38 PM
Should I be worried? Also I am pretty sure is K-9 unit. Anybody have ay prior knowledge on this type of situation?


 :cheese:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: ben ji on March 10, 2010, 12:14:11 AM
Should I be worried? Also I am pretty sure he is a K-9 unit. Anybody have any prior knowledge on this type of situation?


Ouch, how many days do you think it will take the dog to tunnel under your fence looking for a treat?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: WildCatzPhreak on March 10, 2010, 02:01:36 AM
You're done for, buddy.  Time to move.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: LinuxHuskerSometimesBasketballCat on March 10, 2010, 07:17:35 AM
Just line your fence with some stink bait.  It'll keep him busy for days.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: steve dave on March 10, 2010, 07:19:41 AM
Is this dog the drug sniffing type or the crotch attacking type?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Pexikan on March 10, 2010, 08:25:54 AM
Gottta move your grow operation elsewhere my friend. Bummer.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 08:51:39 AM
Is this dog the drug sniffing type or the crotch attacking type?

this is a question that needs an answer. Just like why does steve dave ignore me on Twitter? I thought we were friends?

You're done for, buddy.  Time to move.

except I'm the one that's moving in. I've made a huge mistake.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: mcmwcat on March 10, 2010, 10:42:19 AM
befriend him then you get to share in all the illegally confiscated evidence cops steal: weed, laptops, cars, guns, etc. 
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Saulbadguy on March 10, 2010, 10:45:27 AM
Take a dump on his lawn.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: LinuxHuskerSometimesBasketballCat on March 10, 2010, 11:11:39 AM
Take a dump on his lawn.

agreed.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: yoga-like_abana on March 10, 2010, 11:16:56 AM
Have you seen Lakeview Terrace.  :ohno:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: WillieWatanabe on March 10, 2010, 11:18:33 AM
Have you seen Lakeview Terrace.  :ohno:

goddamnit..beat me to it.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Johnny Wichita on March 10, 2010, 11:21:13 AM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't rough ridin' around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be mumped around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: I_have_purplewood on March 10, 2010, 12:16:22 PM
Feed the dog some snausages laced with rat poison.  Problem solved.   :users: (ftp://:users:)
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: 1/64th on March 10, 2010, 12:31:45 PM
I used to live next to TWO cops.  The dude was a murder detective and the wife was a big burly cop who scared me more than he did.  No K-9s though, just two ridic annoying chihuahuas.  They seemed to never want to talk about cop stuff or people to even know that they were cops, so that was good.  I also had a firefighter on the other side of me, fwiw.  And a school principal behind me. 
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: steve dave on March 10, 2010, 12:43:19 PM
Is this dog the drug sniffing type or the crotch attacking type?

this is a question that needs an answer. Just like why does steve dave ignore me on Twitter? I thought we were friends?

 :surprised:  I barely function on twitter.  If you said something to me chances are I missed it.  Sorry broseph, we're friends 
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jtksu on March 10, 2010, 02:29:58 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't rough ridin' around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be mumped around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: CNS on March 10, 2010, 02:37:49 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't fracking around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be fracked around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.

Should prolly finish with telling him he can never borrow you ladder either.  The guy is prolly planning to walk all over you as we type. 

Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 03:27:48 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't fracking around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be fracked around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.


Should prolly finish with telling him he can never borrow you ladder either.  The guy is prolly planning to walk all over you as we type.  



god damnit. he already has my lawn mower  :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jtksu on March 10, 2010, 03:50:35 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't fracking around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be fracked around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:. 

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.

god damnit. he already has my lawn mower  :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno:

Should prolly finish with telling him he can never borrow you ladder either.  The guy is prolly planning to walk all over you as we type. 



WTF would you let him borrow anything?  Who do you call if he just keeps it forever?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 03:59:30 PM
this is not looking good.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: RonLongshaft on March 10, 2010, 05:55:54 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't fracking around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be fracked around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.


Should prolly finish with telling him he can never borrow you ladder either.  The guy is prolly planning to walk all over you as we type.  



god damnit. he already has my lawn mower  :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno:

why the hell does he have your mower at this time of year? you sir are never gonna see that mower again except when he is mowing his lawn
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: john "teach me how to" dougie on March 10, 2010, 07:11:12 PM
I think you need to treat this situation like you are trying to break a horse.  Show up and punch him in the mouth to let him know you aren't fracking around.  If you show up and just try to make nice with him it will only arounse contempt in his cop heart.  He will think you are a simpleton and can be fracked around with.  Let him know you are serious.  Only after this can you two truly be  :cheers:.  

This.  Problem (quickly and completely) solved.



Should prolly finish with telling him he can never borrow you ladder either.  The guy is prolly planning to walk all over you as we type.  



god damnit. he already has my lawn mower  :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno: :ohno:

why the hell does he have your mower at this time of year? you sir are never gonna see that mower again except when he is mowing his lawn

Probably planting some type of wireless recording device up inside the handle. Watch what you do  and say in the garage.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 07:26:52 PM
The garage was going to be where I did all my illicit activities
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: PandaXpanda on March 10, 2010, 09:19:55 PM
The garage was going to be where I did all my illicit activities

Move.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: doom on March 10, 2010, 09:24:53 PM
Dissolve some cocaine in water and soak an inanimate object in it.  Then give it to the dog.  Will kill his sense of smell. 
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 10, 2010, 09:25:17 PM
 :popcorn:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 09:29:33 PM
I will keep everyone updated. I move in this weekend. As far as the moving, its not an option. Get over it. Unless you want to find me a house in the area that is decent, and pay to get out of my contract. Then we can talk.

And as far as illicit activities, i've decided that there are two types of people in this world the people who get caught with dead hookers in their garages and the people that don't (get caught).  lets do this.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 10, 2010, 09:33:46 PM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: CHONGS on March 10, 2010, 09:35:51 PM
illicit or illegal?

also:
never invite him over.  never
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: dobbie4ksu on March 10, 2010, 09:36:08 PM
The biggest drug dealer I ever met was a cop, so they can't all be that bad right?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 09:36:25 PM
Oh, good fracking god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:

This is the obvious first move.
then bust out the cocaine lines and see what he does
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 09:37:38 PM
illicit or illegal?

also:
never invite him over.  never

a little of both.

what wouldn't i invite him over.

The biggest drug dealer I ever met was a cop, so they can't all be that bad right?

just because you saw it on tv or a movie does not mean that you "knew" him.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: dobbie4ksu on March 10, 2010, 09:44:40 PM
illicit or illegal?

also:
never invite him over.  never

a little of both.

what wouldn't i invite him over.

The biggest drug dealer I ever met was a cop, so they can't all be that bad right?

just because you saw it on tv or a movie does not mean that you "knew" him.

Scott Cronk Emporia Police Department now Detective... I know him its ok, you dumb eff
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 09:48:20 PM
when are you going to interview him?!  :excited: :excited: :excited: :excited: :drool: :drool: :drool: :drool: :drool:

 :users:



Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 10, 2010, 09:48:43 PM
illicit or illegal?

also:
never invite him over.  never

a little of both.

what wouldn't i invite him over.

The biggest drug dealer I ever met was a cop, so they can't all be that bad right?

just because you saw it on tv or a movie does not mean that you "knew" him.

Scott Cronk Emporia Police Department now Detective... I know him its ok, you dumb eff


 :eek:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Johnny Wichita on March 10, 2010, 09:50:17 PM
when are you going to interview him?!  :excited: :excited: :excited: :excited: :drool: :drool: :drool: :drool: :drool:

 :users:



 :lol:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: ChiComCat on March 10, 2010, 09:51:24 PM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:

I think you may be underreacting here
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 10, 2010, 09:55:31 PM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:

I think you may be underreacting here

True. This is Asava "The Don" we're talking about here.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: ben ji on March 10, 2010, 10:00:42 PM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:

I think you may be underreacting here

True. This is Asava "The Don" we're talking about here.

I once saw asava talk a wide eyed freshmen into signing away his 4 years of college to campus organization that had policies against alcohol assumption and was founded by 6 bible beating christians.


WITH MY OWN TWO EYES
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 10, 2010, 10:09:39 PM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:

I think you may be underreacting here

True. This is Asava "The Don" we're talking about here.

I once saw asava talk a wide eyed freshmen into signing away his 4 years of college to campus organization that had policies against alcohol assumption and was founded by 6 bible beating christians.


WITH MY OWN TWO EYES

***Says through clenched teeth***  "The bastard!!!"
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jtksu on March 10, 2010, 10:43:37 PM
Dont invite that mofo over.  He'll just strut around with his stupid flattop and reflective sunglasses, all the while ogling your wife and talking about perps he busted for lame crap like jaywalking.  Cops: ya know one, ya know 'em all.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: PandaXpanda on March 10, 2010, 10:46:48 PM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1003.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Faf158%2FPandaXpandaEmaw%2FMeMyselfIrene.jpg&hash=d9885523064d5e98e644c1dd48ab15b2d24f1008)
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: krazykat on March 10, 2010, 10:53:23 PM
kill the dog.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 10, 2010, 10:58:29 PM
kill the dog.

being a dog man myself, i don't think i would have what it takes.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: ben ji on March 10, 2010, 11:30:49 PM
kill the dog.

being a dog man myself, i don't think i would have what it takes.

I know a man that could do the job for you. His last name is molloy and I believe's hes had government training....
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jmlynch1 on March 11, 2010, 12:10:25 AM
kill the dog.

being a dog man myself, i don't think i would have what it takes.
I'll do it. Allergies.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Testy Westy on March 11, 2010, 12:19:21 AM
kill the dog.

being a dog man myself, i don't think i would have what it takes.

I know a man that could do the job for you. His last name is molloy and I believe's hes had government training....

lol
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: sys on March 11, 2010, 03:15:24 AM
try to kill him.


 :cheers:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: waks on March 11, 2010, 06:26:17 AM
kill the dog.

being a dog man myself, i don't think i would have what it takes.
I know for a fact that you raised a puppy for a semester before throwing it into a wood-chipper in order to gain acceptance into some strange cult called a "fraternity" six years ago. Don't bullshit us, Asava.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: dmartin on March 11, 2010, 07:50:46 AM
I will keep everyone updated. I move in this weekend. As far as the moving, its not an option. Get over it. Unless you want to find me a house in the area that is decent, and pay to get out of my contract. Then we can talk.

And as far as illicit activities, i've decided that there are two types of people in this world the people who get caught with dead hookers in their garages and the people that don't (get caught).  lets do this.

This could work out beautifully.  Who better than a cop to point out the location of a few hookers that need to be dead?  You get your hookers to kill, and he cleans up the streets of those dirty whores. You let him smack a few dead hookers around and all is well.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: doom on March 11, 2010, 08:12:19 AM
I will keep everyone updated. I move in this weekend. As far as the moving, its not an option. Get over it. Unless you want to find me a house in the area that is decent, and pay to get out of my contract. Then we can talk.

And as far as illicit activities, i've decided that there are two types of people in this world the people who get caught with dead hookers in their garages and the people that don't (get caught).  lets do this.

This could work out beautifully.  Who better than a cop to point out the location of a few hookers that need to be dead?  You get your hookers to kill, and he cleans up the streets of those dirty whores. You let him smack a few dead hookers around and all is well.

You need to put a dead hooker in his trunks and when he finds it conveniently be there to help him dispose of it.  That way he owes you.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 11, 2010, 08:38:31 AM
I will keep everyone updated. I move in this weekend. As far as the moving, its not an option. Get over it. Unless you want to find me a house in the area that is decent, and pay to get out of my contract. Then we can talk.

And as far as illicit activities, i've decided that there are two types of people in this world the people who get caught with dead hookers in their garages and the people that don't (get caught).  lets do this.

This could work out beautifully.  Who better than a cop to point out the location of a few hookers that need to be dead?  You get your hookers to kill, and he cleans up the streets of those dirty whores. You let him smack a few dead hookers around and all is well.

You need to put a dead hooker in his trunks and when he finds it conveniently be there to help him dispose of it.  That way he owes you.

Would have to be a midget hooker to fit in his trunks. This could get interesting.  :popcorn: :popcorn:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: DILLIGAF on March 11, 2010, 01:55:08 PM
You know they become cops to compensate for other shortcomings, so no worries on the Mrs. wanting anything from him.  Unless she has a uniform fetish, then could be an issue.  Bet the dog is female though, if you get my gist.   :gocho: hth
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Dugout DickStone on March 11, 2010, 02:12:07 PM
eff his wife and film it.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: sys on March 11, 2010, 04:51:50 PM
shazbot! his wife and film it.

that's a good idea.  but also kill the cop.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: KITNfury on March 12, 2010, 08:40:51 AM
Oh, good rough ridin' god. Start the grill and invite him over for a beer. Friend for life.     :cheers:
Worst idea ever. He'll plot to get you one way or another forever if you do.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: leroylulu on March 12, 2010, 12:10:38 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jtksu on March 12, 2010, 02:35:47 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

Well, Asava's days of freedom are certainly limited now.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: CNS on March 12, 2010, 02:49:34 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

Well, Asava's days of freedom are certainly limited now.
This is awesome.  Keep his lawnmower.
 :lol:
 
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: chum1 on March 12, 2010, 03:10:06 PM
Please let this be true.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Johnny Wichita on March 12, 2010, 04:43:56 PM
 :popcorn:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: sys on March 13, 2010, 09:01:34 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

die, cop.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 13, 2010, 09:04:07 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

die, cop.


 :jerk:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: OK_Cat on March 13, 2010, 09:58:26 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

die, cop.


 :jerk:

don't you have some black people to beat with your billy club, cop?
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 13, 2010, 10:01:41 PM
Well, looks like we're both fans of this site! :ksu: :cheers:

die, cop.


 :jerk:

don't you have some black people to beat with your billy club, cop?

Nah. Usually start my day with dumping oklahomo trash down open oil wells.   :gocho:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: OK_Cat on March 13, 2010, 10:07:54 PM
I could literally kill you.  literally.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: TBL on March 13, 2010, 10:18:01 PM
I could literally kill you.  literally.

I'm looking forward to your attempt.   :gocho:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Dugout DickStone on March 14, 2010, 12:40:28 PM
Cops are poor.  Your new neighborhood sounds crapty.  Maybe save some more $$ and move later.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: Pete on March 14, 2010, 12:53:53 PM
I like cops!

 :driving:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: asava on March 15, 2010, 12:30:49 PM
It's been two days and still no sign of him. I think this is the part wher I get real scared and paranoid.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop
Post by: jtksu on March 15, 2010, 12:35:46 PM
It's been two days and still no sign of him. I think this is the part wher I get real scared and paranoid.

Obviously a vampire.  You're double screwed now.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop *UPDATE EDITION
Post by: asava on April 10, 2010, 10:14:07 PM
ever since i've moved here, i haven't seen the car. at all. on top of that i've met his wife who is prego. also learned that the dog is not a trained assassin of fun times. in fact its name is: FAWN.  :lol: :lol: :lol: how could i be so scared of a dog named FAWN?

still have a nagging suspicion that he is just toying with me.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop *UPDATE EDITION
Post by: TBL on April 10, 2010, 10:19:09 PM
ever since i've moved here, i haven't seen the car. at all. on top of that i've met his wife who is prego. also learned that the dog is not a trained assassin of fun times. in fact its name is: FAWN.  :lol: :lol: :lol: how could i be so scared of a dog named FAWN?

still have a nagging suspicion that he is just toying with me.

You got his wife prego'd???  :ohno:
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop *UPDATE EDITION
Post by: asava on April 10, 2010, 10:23:17 PM
ever since i've moved here, i haven't seen the car. at all. on top of that i've met his wife who is prego. also learned that the dog is not a trained assassin of fun times. in fact its name is: FAWN.  :lol: :lol: :lol: how could i be so scared of a dog named FAWN?

still have a nagging suspicion that he is just toying with me.

You got his wife prego'd???  :ohno:

prego'd her eggo.
Title: Re: My New Neighbor is a Cop *UPDATE EDITION
Post by: TBL on April 10, 2010, 11:32:04 PM
ever since i've moved here, i haven't seen the car. at all. on top of that i've met his wife who is prego. also learned that the dog is not a trained assassin of fun times. in fact its name is: FAWN.  :lol: :lol: :lol: how could i be so scared of a dog named FAWN?

still have a nagging suspicion that he is just toying with me.

You got his wife prego'd???  :ohno:

prego'd her eggo.


 :thumbsup: