We'll welcome you w/ open arms.
Here's a few reasons to consider KSU as your next stop:
1. You can park wherever the hell you want. Bill Snyder would personally fire every single person who wrote you a ticket. He might even pants them and make them run through campus also. Students would line up to throw rocks at him/her as they ran.
2. Here at KSU, we care about winning. You'd be free to beat / burn / verbally abuse players as much as needed to ensure our success on the field. We consider that "mentoring" here.
3. It would allow you the opportunity to bury the ku football program. I know it's kind of like bombing rubble at this point, but it's pretty fun.
4. We know you want to be a head coach and we're cool with that. This will give you a chance to gain that back at end up somewhere where you'll be appreciated.
When Bill calls, and we know he will, listen to him. It'll be like old times.
