mucho hilarious ou jokes

[fatty fat fat]

So a wildcat and a sooner walk into O'Hare international airport in Chicago. A flight rep. for delta takes the ticket of the wildcat, welcomes him to O'hare, and tells him of a sweet snack shop in terminal 1. He then quickly and slyly gives him a coupon for 1/2 off @ the terminal 2 starbucks. The wildcat quickly runs off to grab a verde white chocolate mocha.

The same flight rep. takes the ticket of the sooner, and immediately smacks him in the face.

[WillieWannabe]

Little David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- fireman, policeman, salesman, etc... David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father.

"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with some guy and make love with him for money."

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring, and took Little David aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"
"No," said David, "He coaches at the University of Oklahoma , but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

[feralchat]

What do you call a family reunion in Norman, Okla?
A dating pool

[Bookcat]

Why does Bob Stoops eat cheerios on a plate?

Cuz if they were in a bowl he would lose them.

[chum1]

Q:  What do you call it when you shoot a bunch of Oklahomans in the head?
A:  A good idea.

[ksu4life]

Bob Stoops is laying in bed getting ready for bed. Brent Venabels jumps out of the bathroom wearing crotchless panties and lingerie and hells "SUPER PU$$Y!" Stoops looks Venabels up and down and says "I'll have the soup."

[enjoytheNeujahr]

Old Spice.  Hmm i never thought of it but Bill does have impressive Old Spice Swagger.

I wonder if Bill smells like LL Cool J and Urlacher or if they smell like him.  Considering that he is 80 I think you know the answer.

[MadCat]

A Wildcat fan, a Cyclone fan and a Sooner fan were driving their 3/4 ton with Bessie the prize winning heifer in a stock cage down County Road 421 outside of Sand Springs.  The Wildcat fan sees a sheep stuck in the fence and proceeds to stomp on the brakes.  He gets out of the truck, runs over to the sheep and proceeds to &@#% the crap out of the sheep.  He runs back to the truck and exclaims, "EMAW, that was fun!"  A few miles down the road, the Cyclone yells, "STOP!!!"  He gets out of the truck to go &@#% a sheep that had gotten its head stuck in a fence.  When the Cyclone fan gets back, the Sooner fan says, "That DOES look like fun!"  The Sooner fan gets out of the truck and proceeds to stick his head in the fence.

[willie83]

Q. How do we know the toothbrush was invented in Norman?

A. If it had been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

[GoodForAnother]

Q: Why was the United State government's forced relocation of 45,000 Native Americans between 1831-1837 referred to as the Trail of Tears?

A: Because they were forced to move to Oklahoma.

[steve dave]

A duck, a rabbi and a polock were standing around a campfire talking.  The duck says, "I f^cking hate OU fans" the other two agree.

[chum1]

Q:  Who suck ass more than OU?

[chum1]

Q:  Where's my fork?
A:  In OU.

[chum1]

Q:  Where's Toby Keith's boot?
A:  In OU's anus.

[steve dave]

Q:  What do Toby Keith and every OU fan have in common?  
A:  They both smell and their face smells and they are ugly.  

[sonofdaxjones]

A:  Green Side Up

Q:  What is the first sentence in the OU Field Maintenance Manual.

[lonestarkat]

Q: What does a divorce in Norman and a Tornado in Norman have in common?
.
.
.
.
.
A:  Somebody's losin' a trailer!!

[MadCat]

Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: To avoid the smelly OU fans.

[Rick Daris]

after a particularly bad batch of spring thunderstorms, one ou hillbilly was overheard saying to the other... "tornader? shoot, i hardly knew her." 


 

[MadCat]

An OU fan walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The Bartender asks, "Do you have any ID?"
The OU fan responds, "About what?"

[Bhyaaaaa!]

OU Fan: "I'm in Norman"

KSU Fan: "......is Norman your boyfriend?"  

[willie83]

Q: How do you circumcise a Sooner?



A: Kick his sister in the chin.

[willie83]

Q: What does a 13 year old girl from Oklahoma say after sex?



A: " Git offa me, daddy, you're crushing my cigarettes!

[MadCat]

A Cyclone fan and a Sooner fan are working at a construction site for a new grain elevator in Hiawatha.  At noon, the two take their lunch from atop the unfinished structure.  The Cyclone fan opens his lunch: "JFC, a Walking Taco!  I'm so sick of these.  I've asked my wife not to pack these in my lunch.  If I have another Walking Taco for lunch tomorrow, I'm going to jump to my death."  The Sooner fan opens his lunch: "ICK, a bologna sandwich!  My wife knows I hate these.  If I have a bologna sandwich tomorrow, I'm going to jump to my death."  The next day, the Cyclone fan opens his lunch, sees the walking taco, and proceeds to jump to his death.  The Sooner fan opens his lunch, sees a bologna sandwich, and jumps to his death.

At the funeral, the wives of the Cyclone and Sooner fans discussed the tragedy:
Cyclone fan's wife: "I should have listened to my husband.  If I knew he hated Walking Tacos that much, I wouldn't have put them in his lunch."
Sooner fan's wife: "I don't know why my husband jumped.  He's been packing his own lunch for years."

[LimestoneOutcropping]

Q:  How do you break Landry Jones's finger?


A:  Punch him in the nose.

[steve dave]

W:  What does an OU fan have in common with this guy I know at work named Luke?
A:  They're both f^cking assholes who I hate.

[Brock Landers]

Okay I have another one, stop me if you've heard this.

A priest, a rabbi, and Tim Reyer walk into a bar.  The bartender looks at Tim Reyer and says "Dude, it's 4th down.  Why aren't you standing in the end zone getting ready for a punt?  Pull your head out of your rectum!"

And Reyer says "Rectum?  Hell, it nearly killed him!!"

[MENSACat]

Knock knock:
Who's there?

FRACK YOU BOB STOOPS AND THE ENTIRE STATE OF OKLAHOMA!
...except you Brent. We still love you!

[Rick Daris]

Knock knock:
Who's there?

FRACK YOU BOB STOOPS AND THE ENTIRE STATE OF OKLAHOMA!
...except you Brent. We still love you!

actual conversation with an ou fan that just occured in my office...

me: come check out this joke that mensacat just posted on ksufans.com


oufan: what's a mensa?


me: it's the largest, oldest and best known high-IQ society in the world, and a non-profit organization open to people who score at the 98th percentile or higher on a standardized, supervised intelligence test. It is also formally composed of national groups and the umbrella organization Mensa International.

Now, the actual word mensa means "table" in Latin as is symbolized in the organization's logo.


oufan: what's a table?

[LimestoneOutcropping]

Q:  What do Jody Foster's character in the accused, the chick Roman Polaski raped and Sam Bradford all have in common?

A:  They all should have left early but instead got &@#%ed by some dirtbag.