Author Topic: chum1's dumb job stories (Read 74016 times)

chum1 · « **Reply #125 on:** March 28, 2019, 01:55:26 PM »

GG: Can we reschedule today's team meeting because D2 is out today?
me: Sure. When I scheduled it this morning, I didn't know if D2 even needed to be there because he doesn't have access.
GG: Well, I was thinking from the perspective of team morale.
me: Yeah, no problem. I'm just going with the flow on D2. I don't really know what's going on with him.
GG: Yeah, me either.
...
me: Yesterday, D2 told NG2 that he plans to go Sales.
GG: He's been saying that forever. He never does.

Mystery not solved!

chum1 · « **Reply #126 on:** March 28, 2019, 04:32:13 PM »

Quote from: chum1 on March 28, 2019, 01:55:26 PM

GG: Can we reschedule today's team meeting because D2 is out today?
me: Sure. When I scheduled it this morning, I didn't know if D2 even needed to be there because he doesn't have access.
GG: Well, I was thinking from the perspective of team morale.
me: Yeah, no problem. I'm just going with the flow on D2. I don't really know what's going on with him.
GG: Yeah, me either.
...
me: Yesterday, D2 told NG2 that he plans to go Sales.
GG: He's been saying that forever. He never does.

Mystery not solved!

3.5 hours later, GG sends out a meeting invite for next week in order to get NG1 and NG2 up to speed on where we are with implementing this new software. Not included on the invite: D2.

steve dave · « **Reply #127 on:** March 28, 2019, 08:53:32 PM »

lmao

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chum1 · « **Reply #128 on:** April 09, 2019, 08:59:50 AM »

Quote from: chum1 on March 06, 2019, 01:06:51 PM

Quote from: chum1 on March 04, 2019, 03:57:46 PM
Cast of Characters

Owner/CEO: former D1 basketball player, mostly just wants to glorify Jesus Christ
Charlie Sheen door guy: President/COO until 1/1/18
D2: dude#2, old software guru, my former boss's former boss
D1: dude#1, my former boss, took me to the store to shop for my computer, now contractor
GG: German girl, new software guru, my current boss

NG1: new girl 1, started this week
NG2: new girl 2, starts in three weeks

YG: young guy who was on team for about six months until GG decided he too often needed to be told what to do because of inexperience and pawned him off to another department in the company immediately prior to the arrival of NG1. He was super bummed about that and has since been earnestly and unsolicitedly helping to train NG1 and NG2, trying to get back into GG's good graces and back on our team.

chum1 · « **Reply #129 on:** April 09, 2019, 09:12:47 AM »

GG can't make it to La Jolla with me at the end of the month as planned. The two of us were chatting and she was debating the value of sending NG1 and NG2 given the cost. And then it occurred to her to worry about an even further possible cost of sending YG. The possible cost of sending D2, however, was not part of her calculation.

chum1 · « **Reply #130 on:** April 15, 2019, 01:33:43 PM »

So, my company sponsored a Showtime PPV boxing match in Atlantic City over the weekend. (WTF!?) The company logo was in the middle of the ring and whatnot. GG, NG1, and NG2 had previously expressed how they all detested boxing. For example, when this was announced, I was like, "maybe they'll have a pizza party for those of us not going and we can watch the logo on TV." The three of them agreed that they could take their pizza into another room where no boxing was on TV. This morning, one of them asked if anyone had seen anything from the event. I mentioned that I watched some highlights from Showtime's twitter feed, but that you couldn't really see the logo because it was small and and almost always out of frame and lost among a whole bunch of other sponsor logos that were plastered everywhere. About that time, D2 figured out what was being discussed and starts excitedly rambling away about details of the fight with sportscaster level analysis like he's talking to his best buds at happy hour or something. And he just kept going because no one was saying a word back to him. Total silence. I have no idea how it ended because I did what I always do when things get awkward and put my earbuds in.

chum1 · « **Reply #131 on:** April 18, 2019, 03:57:40 PM »

steve dave · « **Reply #132 on:** April 18, 2019, 04:00:01 PM »

lmao

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chum1 · « **Reply #133 on:** April 18, 2019, 04:01:47 PM »

It's still around. Not really on display, but folded in plain sight on his desk.

steve dave · « **Reply #134 on:** April 18, 2019, 04:02:23 PM »

He 100% for certain made it for himself

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ben ji · « **Reply #135 on:** April 18, 2019, 08:50:40 PM »

I have thoroughly enjoyed chum's work stories, keep them coming.

pissclams · « **Reply #136 on:** April 19, 2019, 08:49:21 AM »

i really need someone at his office to move this story forward, i feel like it has all become much too stagnant

steve dave · « **Reply #137 on:** April 19, 2019, 08:53:02 AM »

yeah, I need action

star seed 7 · « **Reply #138 on:** April 19, 2019, 08:53:39 AM »

What this thread needs is a love triangle.

chum1 · « **Reply #139 on:** April 19, 2019, 09:47:37 AM »

Well, I used to sometimes hang out with the girl whose husband got busted To Catch a Predator style and went to prison and she maybe had a thing for me (?) and everyone in the office thought we were sleeping together even though we weren't. And right around that time, at the end of one of the Servant Leadership meetings, Owner/CEO starts going off on God's forgiveness or whatever and uses himself as an example and announces to the five or six people present that he had an affair and was like, "even I can be forgiven! And I had an affair!" And he's basically shouting this personal testimony, "I HAD AN AFFAIR! I HAD AN AFFAIR!"

steve dave · « **Reply #140 on:** April 19, 2019, 10:06:27 AM »

lmao

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pissclams · « **Reply #141 on:** April 19, 2019, 10:13:50 AM »

chum1 · « **Reply #142 on:** April 22, 2019, 04:33:31 PM »

Team meeting today. First one in a while. We just have it in the middle of our room. D2, still "transitioning," has not yet done anything on the new software because he's been SO BUSY. He wasn't in the room at the start time and came in like five minutes after we began. GG is like, "We're having our team meeting. Would you like to join us or do you need to continue with what you were working on earlier?" He says, "Yeah, that probably wouldn't be a good idea. I need to keep working on this stuff. You guys go ahead. I can just use my earphones."

Later, NG2 sends out a follow up from the meeting to the team and it starts like this:

Quote

* [D2] * -> ignore this email until you are done… then any one of us can fill you in ….

He's been transitioning for like 6-8 months. My new theory is that his plan is to never learn anything about the new software and, consequently, never be in a position where GG is telling him what to do. I'm not sure how much longer this will be sustainable.

steve dave · « **Reply #143 on:** April 22, 2019, 04:41:33 PM »

Incred

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DQ12 · « **Reply #144 on:** April 22, 2019, 04:50:41 PM »

given his cards, it's not a bad play, really.

chum1 · « **Reply #145 on:** April 25, 2019, 02:37:26 PM »

This morning NG2 (who'd previously worked with GG at another company) asked if D2 had had any training on the new software yet. GG replied, "No, but maybe that's something you could help him get started with because you're a much better teacher than I am." NG2 is eager to help!

kslim · « **Reply #146 on:** April 25, 2019, 02:42:29 PM »

NG2 is a gluten for punishment

Spracne · « **Reply #147 on:** April 25, 2019, 02:44:49 PM »

Quote from: kslim on April 25, 2019, 02:42:29 PM

NG2 is a gluten for punishment

[Insert bread pun]

IPA4Me · « **Reply #148 on:** April 25, 2019, 03:28:10 PM »

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chum1 · « **Reply #149 on:** May 01, 2019, 03:30:19 PM »

This is a pretty good encapsulation of where I'm at with D2. He finished up what he'd been working on on Monday. On Tuesday morning, he sent an email saying that he'd been a car accident and probably won't be in for a few days. I honestly don't know if I believe he was actually in a car accident or if he made it up to avoid the situation here. No idea whatsoever.

Additional background: In the two years I've been here, D1 and D2 (BFFs) have now had three car accidents between them (1 for D1, 2 for D2) which forced them to unexpectedly work from home for like a week.