Author Topic: Kids  (Read 119330 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #550 on: April 17, 2014, 09:07:01 PM »
I just spend two hours at the gym mostly talking, and now I'm sitting in my underwear eating sardines directly out of the can. I don't think that paints a picture of a guy that should be taking on the responsibility of other tiny lives.

Offline steve dave

  • Global Moderator
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 69554
  • Romantic Fist Attachment
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #551 on: April 17, 2014, 09:07:12 PM »
I hope you like poop, you're going to see lots of it. And smell it. And touch it on accident sometimes. That's the worst part.

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #552 on: April 17, 2014, 09:07:49 PM »
I just spend two hours at the gym mostly talking, and now I'm sitting in my underwear eating sardines directly out of the can. I don't think that paints a picture of a guy that should be taking on the responsibility of other tiny lives.

you actually sound very qualified

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #553 on: April 17, 2014, 09:08:22 PM »
Grats emo.  First?

Congrats emo! you did it!

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #554 on: April 17, 2014, 09:09:12 PM »
I hope you like poop, you're going to see lots of it. And smell it. And touch it on accident sometimes. That's the worst part.

louis ck has a joke about wiping poop out of a tiny vagina.

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #555 on: April 17, 2014, 09:09:55 PM »
just checking in guys.  no kids after almost ten years but ms tobias and i still like to pak

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #556 on: April 17, 2014, 09:09:56 PM »
I just spend two hours at the gym mostly talking, and now I'm sitting in my underwear eating sardines directly out of the can. I don't think that paints a picture of a guy that should be taking on the responsibility of other tiny lives.

you actually sound very qualified

oh. well i wasn't ready for that answer. i need to re-group.

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #557 on: April 17, 2014, 09:12:11 PM »
I hope you like poop, you're going to see lots of it. And smell it. And touch it on accident sometimes. That's the worst part.

also isn't the worst part probably that you just can't do as much stuff anymore?

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #558 on: April 17, 2014, 09:12:27 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

Offline tdaver

  • Katpak'r
  • ***
  • Posts: 1184
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #559 on: April 17, 2014, 09:17:58 PM »
I hope you like poop, you're going to see lots of it. And smell it. And touch it on accident sometimes. That's the worst part.

And if it's a boy make sure you don't leave him exposed even for a second.  He's more than likely aiming right at your face.

Offline ew2x4

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 3918
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #560 on: April 17, 2014, 09:27:00 PM »
Mine is one year old today. Greatest thing ever. I also miss privacy, sleep, and quiet. The poop and puke thing isn't that bad.

Offline Cire

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 14466
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #561 on: April 17, 2014, 09:32:55 PM »
Just make the mom breast feed as long as possible.  Poop will be much easier to deal with

Offline meow meow

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 10016
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #562 on: April 17, 2014, 09:40:32 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

 :dunno:

Offline Emo EMAW

  • PCKK7DC Survivor
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *******
  • Posts: 17891
  • Unrepentant traditional emobro
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #563 on: April 17, 2014, 09:48:03 PM »
It's my first, yes.  I'm not pumped about the poop but I'm a big believer in division of labor.

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #564 on: April 17, 2014, 09:49:35 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

 :dunno:

you'd be a fun father if you felt ready for it

Offline 420seriouscat69

  • Don't get zapped! #zap
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 56685
  • #FireBradHill!
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #565 on: April 17, 2014, 09:49:50 PM »
The fanning name resides through me. What are the chances of me producing all girls when I marry ms. Wackysquawk?  Ibet pretty high.

Online chum1

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 16317
  • Gucci Mane Book Reader
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #566 on: April 17, 2014, 09:50:10 PM »
EMO, did you have sex or go with in vitro?

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #567 on: April 17, 2014, 09:51:11 PM »
EMO, did you have sex or go with in vitro?

likely a bloodfart/hellhammer gif thread mishap

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #568 on: April 17, 2014, 09:52:53 PM »
The fanning name resides through me. What are the chances of me producing all girls when I marry ms. Wackysquawk?  Ibet pretty high.

49% if you have one child

Offline Benja

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 6268
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #569 on: April 17, 2014, 09:54:32 PM »
Tobias I'm starting to think you have some plan to get everyone else to have kids then you can do doughnuts in our yards and drink beers all day

Offline meow meow

  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • ****
  • Posts: 10016
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #570 on: April 17, 2014, 09:55:47 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

 :dunno:

you'd be a fun father if you felt ready for it

I already have a 2 year old, but you totally nailed it, I am a fun father!  Tonight the wife was giving the daughter a bath and I jumped in with my clothes on, she laughed so hard and made me stay in the bath for 20 minutes, then wanted me to put her to bed instead of mom.  So blessed, ready for another tho.

Offline Spracne

  • Point Plank'r
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *
  • Posts: 10708
  • Distinguished Scholar/Gentleman
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #571 on: April 17, 2014, 09:56:02 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

Do me  :drool:

Online michigancat

  • Contributor
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 40156
  • change your stupid avatar.
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #572 on: April 17, 2014, 09:56:29 PM »
I hope you like poop, you're going to see lots of it. And smell it. And touch it on accident sometimes. That's the worst part.

also isn't the worst part probably that you just can't do as much stuff anymore?

you'll be able to do whatever you want

Offline Tobias

  • Fattyfest Champion
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *****
  • Posts: 28053
  • hypoclique lieutenant
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #573 on: April 17, 2014, 09:56:33 PM »
anyone else wanna know if they should reproduce?

Do me  :drool:

i'm not sure hippocraticoaf would approve

Offline Emo EMAW

  • PCKK7DC Survivor
  • Pak'r Élitaire
  • *******
  • Posts: 17891
  • Unrepentant traditional emobro
    • View Profile
Re: Kids
« Reply #574 on: April 17, 2014, 09:57:57 PM »
EMO, did you have sex or go with in vitro?

It was a tough decision (we used a decision matrix) but we decided copulation was the most organic way to produce offspring.