45k isnt enough to file bankruptcy over, but if the rest of that package (over 100k?) is, if you are married but live in separate homes, she could file bankruptcy without bringing any of your finances under scrutiny. I don't know how much footwork work they do, but renting a nearby apartment out for a year and "living" there might be an option to make that route work.
I don't know how much trouble having a bankrupt spouse would be going forward, or how that would compare to your current sitch. The bottom line is, the easiest way out is just to pay down the debt. Thats the only way to wrap it up without alot of kicking and screaming. Beyond that its a question of how much kicking and screaming costs to you.
Another option is, if the interest rate is whats killing her in the arrangement, tieing the debt to someone with better credit could convince a creditor to take on the debt at a much better rate. This is why college kids can cosign with their parents on debt with no immediate path towards repayment without incurring a really poor rate. Alot, of people would advise you not to muddy yourself in the arrangement, and from a position of pure self-interest you should not, but you are a married couple now. You'll have to deal with this as long as you're together, money she doesn't have is money you don't have, etc. If shes worth it, you do have some leverage to improve the financial situation. Now, i don't know your relationship, this is alot to ask of someone. But to draw a parallel, if she had a kid from a previous marriage, no one would advise you to "let her deal with that one" without you. Like it or not, it is your problem now, too. I'm just tossing out another option.
