Master Dating Thread

[wetwillie]

Trim reminds me that this thread exists. I have never actually read it, but I have a story. Went on a date with this girl last week who told me about giving a certain Seahawks player a rim job and managed to insult me for being a teacher and not making enough money. She also has Lockett's #. And she dated a Jet for about 6 months. Hoo boy. Not my best bumble experience.

You smash?

[Trim]

Goddammit, I left off on page 52 of this thread.  Miss me with the last 248 pages; I'm in on this 'hawks rim job'r saga.

[pvegs]

Trim reminds me that this thread exists. I have never actually read it, but I have a story. Went on a date with this girl last week who told me about giving a certain Seahawks player a rim job and managed to insult me for being a teacher and not making enough money. She also has Lockett's #. And she dated a Jet for about 6 months. Hoo boy. Not my best bumble experience.

You smash?

WW, you cannot know how much I dislike "smash" as a verb for sex, but we did not. I texted a different girl (who is actually a good person) after the bad date and went home with her.

[pvegs]

Goddammit, I left off on page 52 of this thread.  Miss me with the last 248 pages; I'm in on this 'hawks rim job'r saga.

I actually think I posted in here at some point, but it has literally been years. The stories I could tell though about Seattle girls. Jesus, met a lot of cool people, but my bad date stories are the fun ones to tell.

[Trim]

If it wasn't so well-known that the 'Hawks had really solid special teams, you could've passed yourself off as a kicker.

[pvegs]

If it wasn't so well-known that the 'Hawks had really solid special teams, you could've passed yourself off as a kicker.

Hauschka is also pretty damn handsome irl. I roll with the reality of being a teacher/commercial fisherman and that gets me by ok. At least until they see the car/apartment

[Trim]

If it wasn't so well-known that the 'Hawks had really solid special teams, you could've passed yourself off as a kicker.

Hauschka is also pretty damn handsome irl. I roll with the reality of being a teacher/commercial fisherman and that gets me by ok. At least until they see the car/apartment

I meant specifically for the seahawk groupie you found yourself with.

You could borrow my jeep. Yeah, it's got a giant pak head on it, but still. You fishing all summer?

[The Big Train]

WW sounds like a horrible person

[pvegs]

If it wasn't so well-known that the 'Hawks had really solid special teams, you could've passed yourself off as a kicker.

Hauschka is also pretty damn handsome irl. I roll with the reality of being a teacher/commercial fisherman and that gets me by ok. At least until they see the car/apartment

I meant specifically for the seahawk groupie you found yourself with.

You could borrow my jeep. Yeah, it's got a giant pak head on it, but still. You fishing all summer?

Lol, I feel like borrowing the jeep would be a #nephew type situation. The old Ford Focus gets me by. I'm working on locking down a fishing job, but the exact logistics of that are not set just yet.

[420seriouscat69]

Goddammit, I left off on page 52 of this thread.  Miss me with the last 248 pages; I'm in on this 'hawks rim job'r saga.

I actually think I posted in here at some point, but it has literally been years. The stories I could tell though about Seattle girls. Jesus, met a lot of cool people, but my bad date stories are the fun ones to tell.

That's exactly why this thread exists

[Winters]

If it wasn't so well-known that the 'Hawks had really solid special teams, you could've passed yourself off as a kicker.

Hauschka is also pretty damn handsome irl. I roll with the reality of being a teacher/commercial fisherman and that gets me by ok. At least until they see the car/apartment

I meant specifically for the seahawk groupie you found yourself with.

You could borrow my jeep. Yeah, it's got a giant pak head on it, but still. You fishing all summer?

Lol, I feel like borrowing the jeep would be a #nephew type situation. The old Ford Focus gets me by. I'm working on locking down a fishing job, but the exact logistics of that are not set just yet.

"Aye, babe, let's take my Uncle's pak head jeep out to Snoqualmie Falls, have a picnic, and aggressively make out for 30-45 minutes."

Definite #nephew situation, yep.

[Trim]

"Aye, babe, let's take my Uncle's pak head jeep out to Snoqualmie Falls, have a picnic, and aggressively make out for 30-45 minutes."

Definite #nephew situation, yep.

He can't reveal in advance that it's his uncle's car.  Otherwise, 80's movie/sitcom hijinks won't ensue.

[Mrs. Gooch]

Trim reminds me that this thread exists. I have never actually read it, but I have a story. Went on a date with this girl last week who told me about giving a certain Seahawks player a rim job and managed to insult me for being a teacher and not making enough money. She also has Lockett's #. And she dated a Jet for about 6 months. Hoo boy. Not my best bumble experience.

You smash?

WW, you cannot know how much I dislike "smash" as a verb for sex, but we did not. I texted a different girl (who is actually a good person) after the bad date and went home with her.

How do you feel about the term "Banging"? Just wondering.

[TCUHornedFrog]

So...esteemed gE'ers...I'm newly single after 13 years of marriage/relationship/whatever you want to call it.

I need your guys help with new pick up lines....so.....get started.  I will steal any and all good ones and maybe give credit for them (old "is your dad a thief" pick up lines aren't necessary).

[Mrs. Gooch]

Well that sucks. Gonna need some context of where you expect to be picking up chicks.

[star seed 7]

How'd you get your hair so big?

[Emo EMAW]

Sorry to hear that TCUhornedfrog.

[yoga-like_abana]

So...esteemed gE'ers...I'm newly single after 13 years of marriage/relationship/whatever you want to call it.

I need your guys help with new pick up lines....so.....get started.  I will steal any and all good ones and maybe give credit for them (old "is your dad a thief" pick up lines aren't necessary).

that's a long time.. you should probably take some time off big guy

[Dugout DickStone]

 Pretend you are a Cat fan for maximum smashing

[TCUHornedFrog]

Well that sucks. Gonna need some context of where you expect to be picking up chicks.

Here, there, anywhere. 

[TCUHornedFrog]

Sorry to hear that TCUhornedfrog.

Appreciate it.

[TCUHornedFrog]

that's a long time.. you should probably take some time off big guy

Normally, I would agree but this was a drawn out process.  Met my ex in sophomore year of college.  We were off and on for about a year, and then solid until recently.  Over the last 18 months, she got spun out on meth.  She cheated.  She got arrested.  She got bailed out.  We tried to reconcile for the first time and then she got arrested for pissing dirty on pre-trial release.  She made promises so we sent her to rehab.  She went back to using and cheating on me so she is gone and I'm done.

I'm ready for someone who isn't a rough ridin' nightmare (plus I get cranky if I'm not regularly smashing someone).  What sucks is that we have a 9 year old and I will have him full time (she's acting like she is going to be involved but I give that 2-3 weeks).

[TCUHornedFrog]

Pretend you are a Cat fan for maximum smashing

TBH, you guys are kind of trending down while TCU is trending up.  I think I'm going to stick with self-identifying as a Horned Frog.

[420seriouscat69]

  Sorry, bud. Sounds like a movie.

[TCUHornedFrog]

Sorry, bud. Sounds like a movie.

I wish it was a movie.  Then I would have at least seen some royalties or those celebrity gift basket things that celebrities get for being them.