This team is full of retards, thus the Corky awards, your nominees are;
Adam Potazak- for his work in the role of the baby giraffe in "early season late game mopup"
Juevol Myles- for most awkward wind-up of a setshot ever.
Devon Peterson- for being born without a neck.
Martavious Irving- for dancing himself into the doghouse.
Nick Russell- for being so bad at defense that the third most talented offensive player on the team can't stay on the floor for a horrendous offensive team.
Freddy Asprilla- for the inability of a guy 6-10 280 to finish from two feet out, and for the worst free throw stroke on the worst FT team in the country.
Jordan Henriquez Roberts- very hollywood hyphenated name btw, for being totally clueless, for eclipsing the worthless foul record previously held by two wilcats Jamar Samuels and Luis Colon, Jordan has also worked on projects such as " The brick from two feet" and "Dude where's my man"
Wally Judge- Wally has a special dissability in that when he shoots his right hand is lined up with the basket, but then he retardedly makes his right elbow jut out at 90 degrees from his hand for easily the most awkward shooting motion ever seen on a Mcdonalds all-american before. Wally has worked on "Never draw contact" and the James Bond re-make "I'm a pussy"
Shane Southwell- Shane surprised the acadamy with his newly released work where he turns away layups in an effort to make the extra pass.
Curtis Kelly-Curt co-starred in two blockbuster hits " How to eff up a season in 7-days" and "Selfish"
Jamar Samuels- his corkiness manifests itself many different ways, the way he runs, being overyly aggressive at the wrong time, fearing contact on a shot or imagining contact that doesn't exist, and overall just making the routine play difficult.
Jacob Pullen- Jake is nominated for his role in "Retards say the funniest things"
And the winner is ...............................
Frank Martin- for making all of this possible, Frank wrote, directed and helped out in so many ways behind the scenes.
P.S. If you were not mentioned on the nominee list IT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE NOT A Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!).
