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TITLETOWN - A Decade Long Celebration Of The Greatest Achievement In College Athletics History => Kansas State Football => Topic started by: steve dave on July 29, 2014, 07:46:18 AM

Title: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: steve dave on July 29, 2014, 07:46:18 AM: (https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xfp1/t1.0-9/p403x403/10547579_10100135298857430_1361648400368698765_n.jpg)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 8manpick on July 29, 2014, 07:50:13 AM: Can't say I'm all that surprised
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: sonofdaxjones on July 29, 2014, 07:54:18 AM: Did the White Wizard just call out the FP's?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: kslim on July 29, 2014, 08:02:16 AM: Damn. Whoever took that pic is probably dead by now
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: WillieWatanabe on July 29, 2014, 08:07:14 AM: P.S.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: sonofdaxjones on July 29, 2014, 08:08:23 AM: Fight thru it guys!
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Spracne on July 29, 2014, 08:16:30 AM: I give you Friday off, and this? This is how you repay me? By consuming mass amounts of ethanol, thereby abusing your bodies?

P.S. Not cool
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on July 29, 2014, 08:28:17 AM: so the offense scored the least amount of points that it scored all year, yet it's the defenses fault that we lost to ndsu? weird.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: pissclams on July 29, 2014, 08:31:05 AM: it's not written in purple ink.
it's not written diagonally across k-state football letterhead.
it's not getting read. period.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on July 29, 2014, 08:32:43 AM: Quote from: Rick RowdyBoyy Daris on July 29, 2014, 08:28:17 AM
so the offense scored the least amount of points that it scored all year, yet it's the defenses fault that we lost to ndsu? weird.

Both units were just terrible in that game. The only bright spot was Daniel Sams.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 420seriouscat69 on July 29, 2014, 08:36:29 AM: eff'em up, Bill! :emawkid:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 420seriouscat69 on July 29, 2014, 08:39:53 AM: Also, lol at SD thinking the walk-ons were a part of this. They're the ones who narked.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Dugout DickStone on July 29, 2014, 09:15:55 AM: Looks like giving these kids a chance to walk on when they weren't good enough to earn a scholarship was a pretty big mistake.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: CNS on July 29, 2014, 09:24:46 AM: If these walk on assholes make it so that some of the adorable cats have to run extra sprints or something, I am going to be pretty pissed.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on July 29, 2014, 09:51:43 AM: I heard the culprits got punished with no werther's for 2 weeks
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 8manpick on July 29, 2014, 09:56:04 AM: Quote from: WackyCat08 on July 29, 2014, 08:39:53 AM
Also, lol at SD thinking the walk-ons were a part of this. They're the ones who narked.
He means ex-walkons. Mueller specifically.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Three Fingers on July 29, 2014, 10:07:41 AM: Quote from: Rick RowdyBoyy Daris on July 29, 2014, 08:28:17 AM
so the offense scored the least amount of points that it scored all year, yet it's the defenses fault that we lost to ndsu? weird.

The Defense got their crap pushed in on an 8 1/2 minute drive in the 4th quarter. I'm assuming Dollar Bill thinks they got tired late in the game and couldn't get off the field due to poor summer workout attendance. Read between the lines, Theo. Read between the LINES.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Dugout DickStone on July 29, 2014, 10:32:56 AM: Quote from: Three Fingers on July 29, 2014, 10:07:41 AM
Quote from: Rick RowdyBoyy Daris on July 29, 2014, 08:28:17 AM
so the offense scored the least amount of points that it scored all year, yet it's the defenses fault that we lost to ndsu? weird.

The Defense got their crap pushed in on an 8 1/2 minute drive in the 4th quarter. I'm assuming Dollar Bill thinks they got tired late in the game and couldn't get off the field due to poor summer workout attendance. Read between the lines, Theo. Read between the LINES.

Never heard Snyder called "Dollar Bill" - new one
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Ghost of Stan Parrish on July 29, 2014, 10:58:40 AM: Quote from: Dugout DickStone on July 29, 2014, 10:32:56 AM

Never heard Snyder called "Dollar Bill" - new one

Not awful.

"Buffalo Bill" Snyder
"Defense Appropriations Bill" Snyder
"Bill of Rights" Snyder

Yeah, no.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 29, 2014, 11:10:52 AM: If any of you mother fuckers smiles I will blow your head off with a shotgun.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MouseRat on July 29, 2014, 10:44:48 PM: Quote from: Emo EMAW on July 29, 2014, 11:10:52 AM
If any of you mother fuckers smiles I will blow your head off with a shotgun.
:blush:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 30, 2014, 11:27:14 PM: Looking back, I’d say I had a pretty enjoyable childhood, nothing bad ever happened to me. I barely ever got sick, never broke any bones, or got into fights with my cousins when I visited. I was basically a picture perfect child, not to brag. Except, one time when I was visiting my older cousins I experienced the strangest event, and even today, I still can’t tell myself that it was just my imagination.

I was probably about six years old at the time, but I still remember everything about that night like it was yesterday. I was climbing trees with my cousins most of the day, and when it got dark, we went inside. My aunt and uncle went out for dinner so it was just us left in the old house. And then I suggested it, “Let’s play hide and seek!” Sometimes I wonder how it would have been if I hadn’t suggested that.

Either way, it was Alex’s turn to be it first since he lost ‘rock, paper, scissors,’ and Ray and I scattered to find a hiding place. First, I tried squeezing behind the sofa, my favourite hiding spot, but it was closer to the wall than normal. As lanky as I was as, I couldn’t fit that time. Alex was half way done counting, so as a last resort I ran into their bedroom and looked around, trying to find any place to hide, obvious or not. Thankfully, the room was quite messy, so I figured that if I hid under the desk, I would blend in enough. Anything was better than being caught without a hiding spot. As I was about to dive under the desk, I noticed my other cousin, Ray, had already beat me there. I could see some of her long dark hair peeking out from beneath the blanket she was hiding under. Alex was almost done counting, so I had no choice but to join Ray.

I said to let me under the blanket with her, but when I reached out to pull some of it over me she scooted away. I scooted closer and reached out again whispering a really long ‘pleaaase,’ but she jerked away to completely avoid my touch. Fine, I thought, I guess that’s fair anyway, since she was here before me, it makes sense for me to be the one to be caught first. I teasingly whispered that I could see her hair anyways, and she rustled around in the blanket trying to cover it, not succeeding. When I looked around from my hiding spot, I could see that it was definitely a good place, with some boxes blocking the view of the door around the corner, so if someone just gave a quick glance over the room, they wouldn’t have seen us. I leaned over and whispered how this was a really good hiding spot. Ray rustled around under the blanket in response. Then suddenly I heard Alex walk into the room, he looked around, checking under the bunk beds, right across from the desk. I held my breath. He got up and walked to the closet, checking in there, before going back out of the room. I let out a quiet sigh of relief, and whispered to Ray how close that was. Ray rustled under the blanket again.

From outside the room, I heard both Alex and Ray shout the traditional, “OLLIE OLLIE OXEN FREE!” from the other room. So I started to get up, proud of not having lost hide and seek, and said come on to Ray, but she didn’t move from under the blanket.
That’s when I realised that I had heard both of my cousins call for me to come out. I backtracked in my mind to realise that only my two cousins and I were home. Panic fell over me as I ran to the other room as fast as I could and saw both of my cousins standing right there. I tried to explain to them as fast as I could that someone else was in the room with me, and they of course, being older, were reluctant to believe me. I tried pulling them to the hiding spot so I could prove it to them, and it took some actual pulling, but I finally got them there.

My heart sunk when we looked under the desk.

The blanket was completely flat.

My cousins laughed at me as I frantically I searched the whole room, top to bottom, and scoured the boxes next to the desk for any trace of the figure, or anything I could have mistaken it for, with no luck.

It was gone. And still, many years later, I have no explanation of what it could have been, and frankly, I’m glad I never got to see what was underneath that blanket.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: HerrSonntag on July 30, 2014, 11:30:26 PM: Quote from: J on July 30, 2014, 11:27:14 PM
Looking back, I’d say I had a pretty enjoyable childhood, nothing bad ever happened to me. I barely ever got sick, never broke any bones, or got into fights with my cousins when I visited. I was basically a picture perfect child, not to brag. Except, one time when I was visiting my older cousins I experienced the strangest event, and even today, I still can’t tell myself that it was just my imagination.

I was probably about six years old at the time, but I still remember everything about that night like it was yesterday. I was climbing trees with my cousins most of the day, and when it got dark, we went inside. My aunt and uncle went out for dinner so it was just us left in the old house. And then I suggested it, “Let’s play hide and seek!” Sometimes I wonder how it would have been if I hadn’t suggested that.

Either way, it was Alex’s turn to be it first since he lost ‘rock, paper, scissors,’ and Ray and I scattered to find a hiding place. First, I tried squeezing behind the sofa, my favourite hiding spot, but it was closer to the wall than normal. As lanky as I was as, I couldn’t fit that time. Alex was half way done counting, so as a last resort I ran into their bedroom and looked around, trying to find any place to hide, obvious or not. Thankfully, the room was quite messy, so I figured that if I hid under the desk, I would blend in enough. Anything was better than being caught without a hiding spot. As I was about to dive under the desk, I noticed my other cousin, Ray, had already beat me there. I could see some of her long dark hair peeking out from beneath the blanket she was hiding under. Alex was almost done counting, so I had no choice but to join Ray.

I said to let me under the blanket with her, but when I reached out to pull some of it over me she scooted away. I scooted closer and reached out again whispering a really long ‘pleaaase,’ but she jerked away to completely avoid my touch. Fine, I thought, I guess that’s fair anyway, since she was here before me, it makes sense for me to be the one to be caught first. I teasingly whispered that I could see her hair anyways, and she rustled around in the blanket trying to cover it, not succeeding. When I looked around from my hiding spot, I could see that it was definitely a good place, with some boxes blocking the view of the door around the corner, so if someone just gave a quick glance over the room, they wouldn’t have seen us. I leaned over and whispered how this was a really good hiding spot. Ray rustled around under the blanket in response. Then suddenly I heard Alex walk into the room, he looked around, checking under the bunk beds, right across from the desk. I held my breath. He got up and walked to the closet, checking in there, before going back out of the room. I let out a quiet sigh of relief, and whispered to Ray how close that was. Ray rustled under the blanket again.

From outside the room, I heard both Alex and Ray shout the traditional, “OLLIE OLLIE OXEN FREE!” from the other room. So I started to get up, proud of not having lost hide and seek, and said come on to Ray, but she didn’t move from under the blanket.
That’s when I realised that I had heard both of my cousins call for me to come out. I backtracked in my mind to realise that only my two cousins and I were home. Panic fell over me as I ran to the other room as fast as I could and saw both of my cousins standing right there. I tried to explain to them as fast as I could that someone else was in the room with me, and they of course, being older, were reluctant to believe me. I tried pulling them to the hiding spot so I could prove it to them, and it took some actual pulling, but I finally got them there.

My heart sunk when we looked under the desk.

The blanket was completely flat.

My cousins laughed at me as I frantically I searched the whole room, top to bottom, and scoured the boxes next to the desk for any trace of the figure, or anything I could have mistaken it for, with no luck.

It was gone. And still, many years later, I have no explanation of what it could have been, and frankly, I’m glad I never got to see what was underneath that blanket.
#squatchproblems
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: GoodForAnother on July 30, 2014, 11:30:38 PM: yeah
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 30, 2014, 11:39:25 PM: You volunteer at the mental health clinic. Given the dangerous nature of the residents, they assigned you the rooms of the less violent patients. The suicidal. Those who hear voices. Those that don’t say anything at all.

You become close to a mute man named Arthur. He is a rapt listener, willing to nod his head for hours as you tell him the story of your life. You mention your past, your present. The people involved in both. Your hopes for the future.

And Arthur just nods.

After several months of listening, you figure that you owe it to Arthur to get him out of the clinic. He can’t be happy sitting in a room by himself nodding at interns everyday. You talk to the supervisor of the clinic. You argue that he isn’t harming anyone. That he grooms and feeds himself with no problems. That perhaps his condition is a physical aliment.

The day comes when your arguing pays off. The supervisor has agreed to let Arthur go. You rush to his room to tell him the news. “You’re free!” You shout. “Isn’t that great?”

And Arthur just nods.

You write your name and address on a piece of paper. Hand it to him. “I’m going to miss having someone to talk to.” You say. “But now you can write me. I can learn all about you. Like why they were so insistent in having you in here, pal. I had to fight Dr. Thanner everyday to get you out.”

He looks at you and takes the paper. Just nods.

You go home, feeling good about yourself. You brag to everyone you can tell, friends, family, classmates, co-workers, about how you came through for Arthur. You even fall asleep with a smile.

That night, your eyes snap open. Screams, unearthly screams wake you up.

Then you see them. Your mother. Your father. Your friends. Your classmates. Your co-workers. Lying on your floor, their blood soaking into your carpet. Your walls stained with carnage. Their heads bashed in, their eyes missing from their sockets. Everyone you know dead or dying.

You whimper and see a man standing in the doorway.

It’s Arthur, holding the piece of paper you gave him.

Your entire body shaking, you choke out. “Are you here to kill me?”

And Arthur just nods.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Benja on July 30, 2014, 11:40:46 PM: I love his passive-aggressive heart piercing barbs
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 30, 2014, 11:52:22 PM: Last year I spent six months participating in what I was told was a psychological experiment. I found an ad in my local paper looking for imaginative people looking to make good money, and since it was the only ad that week that I was remotely qualified for, I gave them a call and we arranged an interview.
They told me that all I would have to do is stay in a room, alone, with sensors attached to my head to read my brain activity, and while I was there I would visualize a double of myself. They called it my “tulpa”.

It seemed easy enough, and I agreed to do it as soon as they told me how much I would be paid. And the next day, I began. They brought me to a simple room and gave me a bed, then attached sensors to my head and hooked them into a little black box on the table beside me. They talked me through the process of visualizing my double again, and explained that if I got bored or restless, instead of moving around, I should visualize my double moving around, or try to interact with him, and so on. The idea was to keep him with me the entire time I was in the room.

I had trouble with it for the first few days. It was more controlled than any sort of daydreaming I’d done before. I’d imagine my double for a few minutes, then grow distracted. But by the fourth day, I could manage to keep him “present” for the entire six hours. They told me I was doing very well.

The second week, they gave me a different room, with wall-mounted speakers. They told me they wanted to see if I could still keep the tulpa with me in spite of distracting stimuli. The music was discordant, ugly and unsettling, and it made the process a little more difficult, but I managed nonetheless. The next week they played even more unsettling music, punctuated with shrieks, feedback loops, what sounded like an old school modem dialing up, and guttural voices speaking some foreign language. I just laughed it off – I was a pro by then.

After about a month, I started to get bored. To liven things up, I started interacting with my doppelganger. We’d have conversations, or play rock-paper-scissors, or I’d imagine him juggling, or break-dancing, or whatever caught my fancy. I asked the researchers if my foolishness would adversely affect their study, but they encouraged me.

So we played, and communicated, and that was fun for a while. And then it got a little strange. I was telling him about my first date one day, and he corrected me. I’d said my date was wearing a yellow top, and he told me it was a green one. I thought about it for a second, and realized he was right. It creeped me out, and after my shift that day, I talked to the researchers about it. “You’re using the thought-form to access your subconscious,” they explained. “You knew on some level that you were wrong, and you subconsciously corrected yourself.”

What had been creepy was suddenly cool. I was talking to my subconscious! It took some practice, but I found that I could question my tulpa and access all sorts of memories. I could make it quote whole pages of books I’d read once, years before, or things I was taught and immediately forgot in high school. It was awesome.

That was around the time I started “calling up” my double outside of the research center. Not often at first, but I was so used to imagining him by now that it almost seemed odd to not see him. So whenever I was bored, I’d visualize my double. Eventually I started doing it almost all the time. It was amusing to take him along like an invisible friend. I imagined him when I was hanging out with friends, or visiting my mom, I even brought him along on a date once. I didn’t need to speak aloud to him, so I was able to carry out conversations with him and no one was the wiser.

I know that sounds strange, but it was fun. Not only was he a walking repository of everything I knew and everything I had forgotten, he also seemed more in touch with me than I did at times. He had an uncanny grasp of the minutiae of body language that I didn’t even realize I was picking up on. For example, I’d thought the date I brought him along on was going badly, but he pointed out how she was laughing a little too hard at my jokes, and leaning towards me as I spoke, and a bunch of other subtle clues I wasn’t consciously picking up on. I listened, and let’s just say that that date went very well.

By the time I’d been at the research center for four months, he was with my constantly. The researchers approached me one day after my shift, and asked me if I’d stopped visualizing him. I denied it, and they seemed pleased. I silently asked my double if he knew what prompted that, but he just shrugged it off. So did I.

I withdrew a little from the world at that point. I was having trouble relating to people. It seemed to me that they were so confused and unsure of themselves, while I had a manifestation of myself to confer with. It made socializing awkward. Nobody else seemed aware of the reasons behind their actions, why some things made them mad and others made them laugh. They didn’t know what moved them. But I did – or at least, I could ask myself and get an answer.

A friend confronted me one evening. He pounded at the door until I answered it, and came in fuming and swearing up a storm. “You haven’t answered when I called you in rough ridin' weeks, you dick!” He yelled. “What’s your rough ridin' problem?”.

I was about to apologize to him, and probably would have offered to hit the bars with him that night, but my tulpa grew suddenly furious. “Hit him,” it said, and before I knew what I was doing, I had. I heard his nose break. He fell to the floor and came up swinging, and we beat each other up and down my apartment.

I was more furious then than I have ever been, and I was not merciful. I knocked him to the ground and gave him two savage kicks to the ribs, and that was when he fled, hunched over and sobbing.

The police were by a few minutes later, but I told them that he had been the instigator, and since he wasn’t around to refute me, they let me off with a warning. My tulpa was grinning the entire time. We spent the night crowing about my victory and sneering over how badly I’d beaten my friend.

It wasn’t until the next morning, when I was checking out my black eye and cut lip in the mirror, that I remembered what had set me off. My double was the one who’d grown furious, not me. I’d been feeling guilty and a little ashamed, but he’d goaded me into a vicious fight with a concerned friend. He was present, of course, and knew my thoughts. “You don’t need him anymore. You don’t need anyone else,” he told me, and I felt my skin crawl.

I explained all this to the researchers who employed me, but they just laughed it off. “You can’t be scared of something that you’re imagining,” one told me. My double stood beside him, and nodded his head, then smirked at me.

I tried to take their words to heart, but over the next few days I found myself growing more and more anxious around my tulpa, and it seemed that he was changing. He looked taller, and more menacing. His eyes twinkled with mischief, and I saw malice in his constant smile. No job was worth losing my mind over, I decided. If he was out of control, I’d put him down. I was so used to him at that point that visualizing him was an automatic process, so I started trying my damnedest to not visualize him. It took a few days, but it started to work somewhat. I could get rid of him for hours at a time. But every time he came back, he seemed worse. His skin seemed ashen, his teeth more pointed. He hissed and gibbered and threatened and swore. The discordant music I’d been listening to for months seemed to accompany him everywhere. Even when I was at home – I’d relax and slip up, no longer concentrating on not seeing him, and there he’d be, and that howling noise with him.

I was still visiting the research center and spending my six hours there. I needed the money, and I thought they weren’t aware that I was now actively not visualizing my tulpa. I was wrong. After my shift one day, about five and a half months in, two impressively men grabbed and restrained me, and someone in a lab coat jabbed a hypodermic needle into me.

I woke up from my stupor back in the room, strapped into the bed, music blaring, with my doppelganger standing over me cackling. He hardly looked human anymore. His features were twisted. His eyes were sunken in their sockets and filmed over like a corpse’s. He was much taller than me, but hunched over. His hands were twisted, and the fingernails were like talons. He was, in short, rough ridin' terrifying. I tried to will him away, but I just couldn’t seem to concentrate. He giggled, and tapped the IV in my arm. I thrashed in my restraints as best I could, but could hardly move at all.

“They’re pumping you full of the good crap, I think. How’s the mind? All fuzzy?” He leaned closer and closer as he spoke. I gagged; his breath smelt like spoiled meat. I tried to focus, but couldn’t banish him.

The next few weeks were terrible. Every so often, someone in a doctor’s coat would come in and inject me with something, or force-feed me a pill. They kept me dizzy and unfocused, and sometimes left me hallucinating or delusional. My thoughtform was still present, constantly mocking. He interacted with, or perhaps caused, my delusions. I hallucinated that my mother was there, scolding me, and then he cut her throat and her blood showered me. It was so real that I could taste it.

The doctors never spoke to me. I begged at times, screamed, hurled invectives, demanded answers. They never spoke to me. They may have talked to my tulpa, my personal monster. I’m not sure. I was so doped and confused that it may have just been more delusion, but I remember them talking with him. I grew convinced that he was the real one, and I was the thoughtform. He encouraged that line of thought at times, mocked me at others.

Another thing that I pray was a delusion: he could touch me. More than that, he could hurt me. He’d poke and prod at me if he felt I wasn’t paying enough attention to him. Once he grabbed my testicles and squeezed until I told him I loved him. Another time, he slashed my forearm with one of his talons. I still have a scar – most days I can convince myself that I injured myself, and just hallucinated that he was responsible. Most days.

Then one day, while he was telling me a story about how he was going to gut everyone I loved, starting with my sister, he paused. A querulous look crossed his face, and reached out and touched my head. Like my mother used to when I was feverish. He stayed still for a long moment, and then smiled. “All thoughts are creative,” he told me. Then he walked out the door.

Three hours later, I was given an injection, and passed out. I awoke unrestrained. Shaking, I made my way to the door and found it unlocked. I walked out into the empty hallway, and then ran. I stumbled more than once, but I made it down the stairs and out into the lot behind the building. There, I collapsed, weeping like a child. I knew I had to keep moving, but I couldn’t manage it.

I got home eventually – I don’t remember how. I locked the door, and shoved a dresser against it, took a long shower, and slept for a day and a half. Nobody came for me in the night, and nobody came the next day, or the one after that. It was over. I’d spent a week locked in that room, but it had felt like a century. I’d withdrawn so much from my life beforehand that nobody had even known I was missing.

The police didn’t find anything. The research center was empty when they searched it. The paper trail fell apart. The names I’d given them were aliases. Even the money I’d received was apparently untraceable.

I recovered as much as one can. I don’t leave the house much, and I have panic attacks when I do. I cry a lot. I don’t sleep much, and my nightmares are terrible. It’s over, I tell myself. I survived. I use the concentration those bastards taught me to convince myself. It works, sometimes.

Not today, though. Three days ago, I got a phone call from my mother. There’s been a tragedy. My sister’s the latest victim in a spree of killings, the police say. The perpetrator mugs his victims, then guts them.

The funeral was this afternoon. It was as lovely a service as a funeral can be, I suppose. I was a little distracted, though. All I could hear was music coming from somewhere distant. Discordant, unsettling stuff, that sounds like feedback, and shrieking, and a modem dialing up. I hear it still – a little louder now.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: GoodForAnother on July 30, 2014, 11:58:57 PM: (Shout) a little bit louder now

(Shout) a little bit louder now

(Shout) A LITTLE BIT LOUDER NOW
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 31, 2014, 12:38:36 AM: I’m writing this down in this journal because if I don’t, I may go insane. You may think me insane after reading my story. I wish I was.

My name is Jared Baldwin, and I am twenty-two years old. I recently moved into a brand new apartment in rural Maine. Everything was going great the first two weeks, I was having no problems unpacking my boxes and everything seemed to fit nicely. It looked as if everything I had bought had been bought to furnish this apartment. The power company had forgotten to shut off the electricity, cable, and wifi since the last tenants had moved out. Or perhaps, now that I think about it, they had left so fast the company never knew they had even moved. I can’t blame them.

The first night sleeping in the apartment, once I had completely furnished it and gotten everything set up the way I wanted it, was fantastic. I had no problems adjusting to the new environment whatsoever. I fell asleep within five minutes of getting into bed. It was strange, especially for me, since I usually have trouble falling asleep anywhere I’m not used to. I had this feeling that I was meant to live in that apartment, though it was run-down and in a completely isolated area. I don’t do well with isolation, though it didn’t bother me in the apartment.

The second day went well, though I noticed something strange about the bathroom mirror. It had been painted over with black paint, not an inch of mirror could be seen through the coat. A sledgehammer rested on the tile as though someone had just dropped it and left after considering smashing the mirror, too concerned about leaving the apartment to pick it up before they moved away.

Of course, I didn’t think anything of it at the time. I was rather excited to have gotten a free sledgehammer.
A few weeks went by without incident, and I was completely happy in my new abode. However, strange things were starting to happen.

One night, around three, I woke up with the urgent need to use the restroom. I shuffled in and stopped dead in my tracks. Though the mirror was covered with black paint, a faint silver glow showed beneath the cracks in the coat. I was fascinated, and overwhelmed with the desire to scrape off the paint and shove my hand through the mirror. I thought I could hear faint whispers coming from the other side, beckoning me to clear the mirror of its black cover.

I came to my senses and realized that what was happening was not fascinating at all, but frightening. The voices behind the mirror became agitated, and a split second later both the glow and the voices were gone. I closed my eyes and shook my head, and when I opened them again I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had been dreaming and had merely sleepwalked into the bathroom.
I used the restroom and returned to my bed without giving the mirror a second thought.

The next night the same thing happened, though I noticed some of the paint had chipped off the mirror. A small hole in the paint, about three inches tall and two inches wide, revealed a sliver of mirror, which glowed and pulsated with a sort of silver electricity. The voices, soothing and inviting, called me and begged me to remove the paint from the mirror.

I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again I found myself in bed. I glanced at the clock, 7:43 am. Had I dreamed the whole thing? I had a nagging doubt in my mind that maybe what was happening was not a dream at all, but common sense put that idea to rest for a while.

A few more nights passed without incident.

I awoke once more and shuffled into the bathroom in the middle of the night, as I had done twice before. This time a very large amount of paint had been removed from the mirror. A hole about a foot tall and four inches wide had been made in the paint. The pulsating, electric glow permeated the surface of the mirror and reached out into the bathroom. Tendrils of smoke trickled from the mirror. Once again, the voices pleaded me to free the mirror from its coating. Once again I found myself back in bed, only to find that it was the next morning.

I went into the bathroom and saw that an even larger hole in the paint had been made overnight. I looked at my hands and saw black under my nails and staining my fingers.

God, had I been the one removing the paint at night? The thought frightened me, and that night I bolted the bathroom door shut from the outside. The previous tenants had placed the lock there, no doubt for the same reason I had.

When I awoke that night, I unlocked the deadbolt and went into the bathroom. The voices, more inviting than ever and making me feel like I was meant to do nothing else but free whatever hid behind that mirror, once again demanded I remove the paint. I obeyed, though a very deep level of my subconscious screamed for me to stop. I suppressed it and let the sheer pleasure of removing the paint drive me to do my duty.

I awoke the next morning horrified to see that I had removed all the paint from the mirror. Not a shrapnel of black remained on the mirror, and my hands were completely black. What had I done? I was afraid to sleep that night.

A few weeks passed without incident.

One night, waking up around three as I had done many times before, I went into the bathroom at the request of the voices coming through the bathroom door. They were louder now, as one would expect, for they were no longer muffled by the paint. What I saw terrified me more than anything I had ever before experienced. The thing that lived in the mirror was not pleasant at all. The silver glow was more intense than ever, surrounding the outside of the mirror. Tendrils of smoke poured out from the glass, and the creature inside grinned at me, revealing rows of jagged fangs. My heart nearly exploded through my chest. The voices that had before been so kind and pleasant now sounded menacing and sinister. The creature, hidden by shadow, climbed through the glass, chanting my name.

I ran, out of the bathroom and into the living room. Hearing it close behind, laughing and taking its time, I bolted out the front door and didn’t look back. I didn’t worry about my belongings or about leaving my door unlocked. I didn’t even grab my car keys, I just ran.

Now, as I take refuge in a neighbor’s home, I can’t help but feel as though I’m not safe. I released it from the mirror, and I know it will hunt me until it pulls me into the mirror with it. I have to get away from Maine. Tomorrow I will be moving to California. I don’t care about my belongings, I just want to be safe.

-

It has been two months since I last wrote in this notebook. I am now living in a very small apartment in southern California, and am working in a restaurant to pay the rent. Though I can barely afford to buy groceries, I am happy that I no longer have to worry about the demon in the mirror.

Though last night I thought I heard a soft, lovely voice calling to me from my bathroom while I slept. That couldn’t have happened, though, I’m probably just still having nightmares because of what happened in Maine. It couldn’t have followed me here, right?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MouseRat on July 31, 2014, 12:43:33 AM: Look, I'm all for scary stories during the dark night hours, but how about we save it for the creepy pasta thread eh?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 8manpick on July 31, 2014, 08:15:38 AM: I like to imagine that J is sitting at his computer writing these. Pretty disappointing it is just C/P. I wonder if he even reads them?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 31, 2014, 01:22:16 PM: ****
Engrossed in the utter annoyance his distasteful food offered, the watchman missed the man who ran into the omen filled place at 3 past ten. Shabbily dressed in an overcoat, Jeff felt pinned against the grieving people who insensitively buried Anelia in his absence.
Incapacitated by shudders of anguish, he fell to his knees. Fatigued by his inability to mourn as one who lost his reason to live, Jeff threw his distraught face to the ground, which was home to his beloved.
You’d look funny in your sixties; with that well kept hair parting ways from you, scattered hair as beard and that nose further withdrawing from your face.
She had not even waited for him to turn eighteen. The proximity of their souls seemed to have fallen short of destiny’s whims indelibly. His flesh hadn’t cultivated hair enough to slot him as an adult, yet his heart flickered at the memories thrown uncaringly at him. The fragrance of her loosely left hair still resided in his nose.
Imagine, we sailing in a boat, stranded in the middle of the sea, with food which would suffice for only few days, and little hope of finding shore!
Imaginations are mirages crafted by the mind to distract one from realities of bitter inheritance. Jeff could segregate irony from mockery now. Life lured them to create fantasy, and now conveniently fooled them. What is given is liable to be taken back.
“But not so soon!” he yelled within.
Within minutes of his reaching Anelia’s dwelling, her grandfather, a man of fine integrity, walked towards him. Bursting into tears, he hung at the 16 something guy, oblivious to the pain that pierced into Jeff’s bruised heart.
Each step Jeff took towards the black stone which read ‘Anelia Raymond’ was a mile he had to trudge. Death had been hostile towards him, life the major conspirator. If only she had not boarded that bus! Quelling the huge drops of tears which crippled him seemed unachievable.
The curious fellows who witnessed this queer sight got a subject for discussion for the rest of the evening.
‘’She had been an exuberant girl, who never disappointed Raymond and his wife………so pity that she is …………..”
Although words of sympathy flowing out of the crowd were audible, Jeff wasn’t sane enough to be receptive. Was their secret no longer to be treasured? And how could she abruptly leave him alone? The acceptance of her bereavement spat on him.
Hysterically, Jeff ran to Reslin and screamed ‘’I had told her to hire an auto. How could someone be so ignorant?”
Once I get into theatre, Jeff, you will find it difficult to impress me with such catchy dialogues!
The winter winds gushing past the faithful didn’t deter them from singing cacophonies of consolation. The uneducated birds possessed maturity finer than their inept brains. They sustained silence without the minutest longing for attention.
The ignorance of adults is selectively termed a mistake; when it is perpetuated by us, it becomes disobedience. Are they not burdened by obligations of obedience? What leaves them unblemished?
The gravel pillowed on her new shelter hid her from Jeff. Recalling the promise of eternally peppering her life with his presence pinched him. The sheer cruelty behind this separation couldn’t be come to terms with.
I swear, I can’t bear such untidiness! Why don’t you just clean this wardrobe of yours? I always have the option of leaving you. So, in order to woo me, you need to initiate action from teenage.
Three hours had passed past her burial, but Anelia drove everyone to wait for a miracle. The infuriated eyes of her friend melted the strong men standing there with tied hands.
‘’We’ll have to leave your friend, Jeff. She has left us, and now we need to leave her’’ cried her grandmother in a subdued tone.
Holding his hand with an uncertain rigidity she screamed ‘’your friend ……………..”
Jeff could no longer hear her. A faint familiar voice reverberated in his ears. The words were a part of his memory. And now they hummed disturbingly in his mind.
I guess, holding on to you never tires me. Perhaps, I even heard Alisha rumor about us being together. Fearfully enough let me warn you. You are not talking about us to anyone, at least not till we reach adulthood. Are you listening to me, Jeff? Hey! You idiot…..Are you …….?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on July 31, 2014, 02:54:09 PM: Quote from: J on July 30, 2014, 11:39:25 PM
You volunteer at the mental health clinic. Given the dangerous nature of the residents, they assigned you the rooms of the less violent patients. The suicidal. Those who hear voices. Those that don’t say anything at all.

You become close to a mute man named Arthur. He is a rapt listener, willing to nod his head for hours as you tell him the story of your life. You mention your past, your present. The people involved in both. Your hopes for the future.

And Arthur just nods.

After several months of listening, you figure that you owe it to Arthur to get him out of the clinic. He can’t be happy sitting in a room by himself nodding at interns everyday. You talk to the supervisor of the clinic. You argue that he isn’t harming anyone. That he grooms and feeds himself with no problems. That perhaps his condition is a physical aliment.

The day comes when your arguing pays off. The supervisor has agreed to let Arthur go. You rush to his room to tell him the news. “You’re free!” You shout. “Isn’t that great?”

And Arthur just nods.

You write your name and address on a piece of paper. Hand it to him. “I’m going to miss having someone to talk to.” You say. “But now you can write me. I can learn all about you. Like why they were so insistent in having you in here, pal. I had to fight Dr. Thanner everyday to get you out.”

He looks at you and takes the paper. Just nods.

You go home, feeling good about yourself. You brag to everyone you can tell, friends, family, classmates, co-workers, about how you came through for Arthur. You even fall asleep with a smile.

That night, your eyes snap open. Screams, unearthly screams wake you up.

Then you see them. Your mother. Your father. Your friends. Your classmates. Your co-workers. Lying on your floor, their blood soaking into your carpet. Your walls stained with carnage. Their heads bashed in, their eyes missing from their sockets. Everyone you know dead or dying.

You whimper and see a man standing in the doorway.

It’s Arthur, holding the piece of paper you gave him.

Your entire body shaking, you choke out. “Are you here to kill me?”

And Arthur just nods.
:D
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Fedor on July 31, 2014, 04:06:10 PM: The first was my favorite, then they got progressively worse. That last one reads like it was translated from Chinese with babelfish.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Trogdor on July 31, 2014, 04:20:25 PM: Quote from: MadCat on July 31, 2014, 02:54:09 PM
Quote from: J on July 30, 2014, 11:39:25 PM
You volunteer at the mental health clinic. Given the dangerous nature of the residents, they assigned you the rooms of the less violent patients. The suicidal. Those who hear voices. Those that don’t say anything at all.

You become close to a mute man named Arthur. He is a rapt listener, willing to nod his head for hours as you tell him the story of your life. You mention your past, your present. The people involved in both. Your hopes for the future.

And Arthur just nods.

After several months of listening, you figure that you owe it to Arthur to get him out of the clinic. He can’t be happy sitting in a room by himself nodding at interns everyday. You talk to the supervisor of the clinic. You argue that he isn’t harming anyone. That he grooms and feeds himself with no problems. That perhaps his condition is a physical aliment.

The day comes when your arguing pays off. The supervisor has agreed to let Arthur go. You rush to his room to tell him the news. “You’re free!” You shout. “Isn’t that great?”

And Arthur just nods.

You write your name and address on a piece of paper. Hand it to him. “I’m going to miss having someone to talk to.” You say. “But now you can write me. I can learn all about you. Like why they were so insistent in having you in here, pal. I had to fight Dr. Thanner everyday to get you out.”

He looks at you and takes the paper. Just nods.

You go home, feeling good about yourself. You brag to everyone you can tell, friends, family, classmates, co-workers, about how you came through for Arthur. You even fall asleep with a smile.

That night, your eyes snap open. Screams, unearthly screams wake you up.

Then you see them. Your mother. Your father. Your friends. Your classmates. Your co-workers. Lying on your floor, their blood soaking into your carpet. Your walls stained with carnage. Their heads bashed in, their eyes missing from their sockets. Everyone you know dead or dying.

You whimper and see a man standing in the doorway.

It’s Arthur, holding the piece of paper you gave him.

Your entire body shaking, you choke out. “Are you here to kill me?”

And Arthur just nods.
:D

Is this about our Arthur, be cause it definitely seems like it
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Pett on July 31, 2014, 07:36:47 PM: Love crap like this. Remember when you were little and your grandparent would scold you? How scary :ohno:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on July 31, 2014, 09:23:33 PM: Quote from: GoodForAnother on July 30, 2014, 11:58:57 PM
(Shout) a little bit louder now

(Shout) a little bit louder now

(Shout) A LITTLE BIT LOUDER NOW

:thumbs:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 31, 2014, 11:03:32 PM: How bad does it make you feel that Felicity Jones will never be your wife? Using a scale of 9 to 10 here people.

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsearchednews.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F04%2FFelicity-Jones-10.jpg&hash=fd1ebeb62733743d6bf1cc3358a181cacdb3edf9)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 31, 2014, 11:04:20 PM: I would travel the universe.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on July 31, 2014, 11:17:05 PM: Most likely multiple universes. The technology is underway.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: bones129 on July 31, 2014, 11:53:12 PM: :popcorn:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Fedor on August 01, 2014, 04:43:59 AM: How and why did this thread become J's personal playground ?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: SdK on August 01, 2014, 05:32:40 AM: Quote from: Fedor on August 01, 2014, 04:43:59 AM
How and why did this thread become J's personal playground ?
The drugs.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: schreds21 on August 01, 2014, 08:51:56 AM: Yeah, I have no idea wtf is going on here.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: detch23 on August 01, 2014, 09:06:02 AM: I think J is just taking the time to show all of us the proper way to ruin a thread.

Whatever your reasoning may be (i.e. the thread sucked to begin with, it stalled out, was started by kim or lollypop kid).

Let's be honest how long was this thread going to be 1/2 a page or so? Now look this is probably one of the more interesting threads other than Will Geary and the expansion thread.

Bravo J Bravo. I have already mentally cataloged this thread for later reference.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: XocolateThundarr on August 01, 2014, 09:10:49 AM: (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstream1.gifsoup.com%2Fview4%2F3218839%2Fmcnulty-what-the-eff-o.gif&hash=39a5fc3cd867f1eb6cb3798f71fe9e2ebdba0982)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Tobias on August 01, 2014, 09:41:33 AM: J is BITB at napalming the crap out of threads
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Emo EMAW on August 01, 2014, 11:08:46 AM: I want to get the thread back on track to see what he dishes out next.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: SEK_EMAW on August 01, 2014, 11:26:37 AM: I thought J was pointing out that he isn't a lazy walk-on and deserves a gE full ride. :dunno:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 12:21:28 PM: These lazys better shape up if they ever want a coveted spot on the WC08AHT
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 8manpick on August 01, 2014, 12:24:41 PM: Quote from: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 12:21:28 PM
These lazys better shape up if they ever want a coveted spot on the WC08AWHT
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 01, 2014, 02:51:56 PM: The year is [spoiler] next year [/spoiler] and the world has been eradicated into a post-apocalypse wasteland. You are one of the remaining few hundred thousand survivors and must work extremely hard and traverse tremendous difficulties to remain one. You must first choose a weapon, you may only pick one, and you must keep that weapon as your only weapon for the rest of your life. Which do you choose:

a.) A Surge Protector - Capable of protecting against surges

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnorthamptoncomputerrepair.com%2FPortals%2F166626%2Fimages%2Fimage_15010.jpg&hash=5aea3b2d5877abc24e54b485c3bb55d68a4c3660)

b.) An Antique Greek Vase - Capable of breaking really easily

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatelinesptgds.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F06%2Fmetropolitan-museum-of-art-greek-sculpture-3.jpg&hash=865e9ff48b59f3aea99b4fd9a59df05122f2c1ec)

c.) A Gift Card to Ross Stores - Capable of huge savings on top of already huge savings

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fkellysluckyyou.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F10%2FSample-Ross-Gift-Card-Image.jpg&hash=05310d60585e9625ac8b7fa91d9e95a42b8ab159)

d.) A Blue Sweatshirt with the Word "Sweatshirt" on it - Capable of clarification

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fandrewneyer.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F08%2FSweatshirt-Royal-Blue.jpg&hash=ae947540b5850e7cec744a9f8cbd78e0b34b0938)

e.) A Quesadilla Maker - Capable of making slightly above average quesadillas

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg2.targetimg2.com%2Fwcsstore%2FTargetSAS%2F%2F%2Fimg%2Fp%2F10%2F39%2F10391696.jpg&hash=059b539b37d927469edb393fa8b0bc63692f6146)

f.) A Copy of Hassel Adkins' Greatest CD "Out to Hunch" - Capable of clever puns

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs5048ac6b0c6d1.img.gostorego.com%2F809E82%2Fcdn%2Fmedia%2Fs5%2F04%2F8a%2Fc6%2Fb0%2Fc6%2Fd1%2Fcatalog%2Fproduct%2Fcache%2F1%2Fimage%2F9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95%2F2%2F0%2F201126_1.jpg&hash=6a64334e762498fc8e77c64ad26fc5efc39440bd)

g.) A Set of 4 Spader-Man Action Figures - Capable of imagination and value

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theshiznit.co.uk%2Fmedia%2FNewsDec2010%2FToys-Spaderman.jpg&hash=5e566ce7ab20bfa8c0bd930b7cec2c1236b21f54)

h.) A Stylish Vent Grate - Capable of a classic feel to your home

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.classicgrills.com%2Fimages%2FRenaissance_Grill_ani.gif&hash=7d4869572e0e0d15b6ac21f8bc4ffce44d485ced)

i.) A knockoff BluRay Player - Capable of showing you the zits on hayden panettiere's face

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fschoolmediaclub.org%2Folv%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F11%2FBlue-Ray-DVD-Player1.jpg&hash=2ff821b91b21a26602197e8358445d44172596c8)

j.) Some wood from a 13th century outhouse - Capable of being wood

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdarksideofthelens.files.wordpress.com%2F2012%2F06%2Fvery-old-wood-1.png&hash=e032c9c357f285097950335f7f78843c7091d376)

Again, you may only choose one. Make a pros and cons list if you are having trouble!
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: 8manpick on August 01, 2014, 02:53:42 PM: Wood
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on August 01, 2014, 03:00:42 PM: Pack of 4 Spader-mans...men...whatever.

(Choking hazard :garr:)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:01:02 PM: sweatshirt
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:02:07 PM: I'll take that vent register
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Ghost of Stan Parrish on August 01, 2014, 03:02:17 PM: Sweatshirt is a trademarked term?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on August 01, 2014, 03:04:10 PM: Quote from: Ghost of Stan Parrish on August 01, 2014, 03:02:17 PM
Sweatshirt is a trademarked term?
In post-apocalyptic future it is....in fact, thou shalt not take the Sweatshirt^tm's name in vain.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:05:28 PM: Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:02:07 PM
I'll take that vent register

I'll wait until you fall asleep, strangle you with the arms of the sweatshirt. Now I have sweatshirt and vent register.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:05:58 PM: Quote from: 8manpick on August 01, 2014, 02:53:42 PM
Wood

I lit the wood on fire. Now you have nothing.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:06:25 PM: Quote from: MadCat on August 01, 2014, 03:00:42 PM
Pack of 4 Spader-mans...men...whatever.

(Choking hazard :garr:)

you can be on my team
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:08:39 PM: Quote from: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:05:28 PM
Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:02:07 PM
I'll take that vent register

I'll wait until you fall asleep, strangle you with the arms of the sweatshirt. Now I have sweatshirt and vent register.

I covered the vent register in poison. Now we're both dead and the CHUDS (resistant to poison) have both weapons. Nice going shithead.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on August 01, 2014, 03:18:23 PM: Quote
eff

I throw my spader-mens at the CHUDs.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:34:50 PM: Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:08:39 PM

Quote from: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:05:28 PM
Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:02:07 PM
I'll take that vent register

I'll wait until you fall asleep, strangle you with the arms of the sweatshirt. Now I have sweatshirt and vent register.

I covered the vent register in poison. Now we're both dead and the CHUDS (resistant to poison) have both weapons. Nice going shithead.

crap i never even saw it coming
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Spracne on August 01, 2014, 03:58:43 PM: Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:08:39 PM

Quote from: Cartierfor3 on August 01, 2014, 03:05:28 PM
Quote from: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 03:02:07 PM
I'll take that vent register

I'll wait until you fall asleep, strangle you with the arms of the sweatshirt. Now I have sweatshirt and vent register.

I covered the vent register in poison. Now we're both dead and the CHUDS (resistant to poison) have both weapons. Nice going shithead.

You must first choose a weapon, you may only pick one, and you must keep that weapon as your only weapon for the rest of your life.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: GoodForAnother on August 01, 2014, 04:21:37 PM: I choose the quesadilla maker.

I walk north.

I turn west.

I find a tortilla.

I walk south.

I turn west.

I open the refrigerator.

I find cheese.

I close the refrigerator.

I walk south.

I combine the tortilla and cheese and place them on the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I plug in the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I smell smoke.

I try to put out the fire.

The fire spreads to the liquor cabinet.

I run north.

I call the fire department.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Dugout DickStone on August 01, 2014, 04:22:03 PM: Vase but if it's taken, Out to Hunch
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Asteriskhead on August 01, 2014, 07:35:52 PM: surge protector.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Spracne on August 01, 2014, 08:18:22 PM: Quote from: Metalhead on August 01, 2014, 07:35:52 PM
surge protector.

To protect your stockpile of hydrating-yet-nutritious-but-possibly-cancerous-but-who-cares-cuz-apocalypse Surge?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: star seed 7 on August 01, 2014, 08:22:20 PM: Quote from: Metalhead on August 01, 2014, 07:35:52 PM
surge protector.

Absolutely the best weapon, and it's not even close
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: bananaeater on August 01, 2014, 08:35:24 PM: Quote from: GoodForAnother on August 01, 2014, 04:21:37 PM
I choose the quesadilla maker.

I walk north.

I turn west.

I find a tortilla.

I walk south.

I turn west.

I open the refrigerator.

I find cheese.

I close the refrigerator.

I walk south.

I combine the tortilla and cheese and place them on the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I plug in the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I smell smoke.

I try to put out the fire.

The fire spreads to the liquor cabinet.

I run north.

I call the fire department.

*** You have died ***
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Tobias on August 01, 2014, 08:47:24 PM: i enjoyed that gfa
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: steve dave on August 01, 2014, 08:53:07 PM: CHUDS kill all of you, sorry
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on August 02, 2014, 01:35:49 AM: It was only a matter of time.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Katpappy on August 02, 2014, 01:36:48 AM: Quote from: detch23 on August 01, 2014, 09:06:02 AM
I think J is just taking the time to show all of us the proper way to ruin a thread.

Whatever your reasoning may be (i.e. the thread sucked to begin with, it stalled out, was started by kim or lollypop kid).

Let's be honest how long was this thread going to be 1/2 a page or so? Now look this is probably one of the more interesting threads other than Will Geary and the expansion thread.

Bravo J Bravo. I have already mentally cataloged this thread for later reference.
I agree. I'm so impressed that I decided to print this thread, since we ran out of TP this morning and what a fitting way to use this information. :'bye cruel world:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Ich.Gewinne on August 02, 2014, 10:37:54 AM: Quote from: bananaeater on August 01, 2014, 08:35:24 PM
Quote from: GoodForAnother on August 01, 2014, 04:21:37 PM
I choose the quesadilla maker.

I walk north.

I turn west.

I find a tortilla.

I walk south.

I turn west.

I open the refrigerator.

I find cheese.

I close the refrigerator.

I walk south.

I combine the tortilla and cheese and place them on the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I plug in the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I smell smoke.

I try to put out the fire.

The fire spreads to the liquor cabinet.

I run north.

I call the fire department.

*** You have died ***

Could you have saved during the waiting period(s)?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 08, 2014, 03:12:12 AM: Drive west on Sunset
To the sea
Turn that jungle music down
Just until we're out of town
This is no one. night. stand
It's a real occasion!
Close your eyes and you'll be there
It's everything they say
The end of a perfect day
Distant lights from across the bay

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one
Here come those Santa Ana winds again
We'll jog with show folk on the sand
Drink kirschwasser from a shell
San Francisco show and tell
Well I should know. by. now
That it's just a spasm
Like a Sunday in T.J.
That it's cheap but it's not free
That I'm not what I used to be
And that love's not a game for three

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one

My friends say no. don't. go
For that cotton candy
Son you're playing with fire
The kid will live and learn
As he watches his bridges burn
From the point of no return

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on August 11, 2014, 09:25:28 AM: I knew I should have went with Out to Hunch. :Crybaby:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: GoodForAnother on August 11, 2014, 12:21:56 PM: Quote from: Tobias on August 01, 2014, 08:47:24 PM
i enjoyed that gfa

Thanks Tobias, I enjoy your posts as well
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: bananaeater on August 11, 2014, 01:57:27 PM: Quote from: Ich.Gewinne on August 02, 2014, 10:37:54 AM
Quote from: bananaeater on August 01, 2014, 08:35:24 PM
Quote from: GoodForAnother on August 01, 2014, 04:21:37 PM
I choose the quesadilla maker.

I walk north.

I turn west.

I find a tortilla.

I walk south.

I turn west.

I open the refrigerator.

I find cheese.

I close the refrigerator.

I walk south.

I combine the tortilla and cheese and place them on the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I plug in the quesadilla maker.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I smell smoke.

I try to put out the fire.

The fire spreads to the liquor cabinet.

I run north.

I call the fire department.

*** You have died ***

Could you have saved during the waiting period(s)?

Insufficient Disc Space Drive C
Abort, Retry, Fail? _
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: john "teach me how to" dougie on August 11, 2014, 05:59:09 PM: Quote from: J on August 08, 2014, 03:12:12 AM
Drive west on Sunset
To the sea
Turn that jungle music down
Just until we're out of town
This is no one. night. stand
It's a real occasion!
Close your eyes and you'll be there
It's everything they say
The end of a perfect day
Distant lights from across the bay

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one
Here come those Santa Ana winds again
We'll jog with show folk on the sand
Drink kirschwasser from a shell
San Francisco show and tell
Well I should know. by. now
That it's just a spasm
Like a Sunday in T.J.
That it's cheap but it's not free
That I'm not what I used to be
And that love's not a game for three

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one

My friends say no. don't. go
For that cotton candy
Son you're playing with fire
The kid will live and learn
As he watches his bridges burn
From the point of no return

Babylon sisters... shake it
Babylon sisters... shake it
So fine so young
Tell me I'm the only one

Steely Dan!
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:46:57 AM: funny shark

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406901939521.gif%3Ft%3D1407911241&hash=799441222dbe1e8d080b8ecd0ff711877a795e92)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:47:37 AM: funny dog

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406986878296.gif%3Ft%3D1407911218&hash=f7009dc9453439b55174110b171bd27906f6f97c)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:48:19 AM: funny breathing

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406910843380.gif%3Ft%3D1407911217&hash=9e0e939cf073e598efb86c54bfcfba8915e0fe1d)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:48:59 AM: funny glue

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407078872233.gif%3Ft%3D1407911255&hash=655c05aa65ebd787f36cee100078071074c85259)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:49:37 AM: funny golf

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406902136855.gif%3Ft%3D1407911281&hash=0474cf381dca88a7778bfd3e9e433f3645c9efa9)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:50:16 AM: funny car

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406902055675.gif%3Ft%3D1407911298&hash=3dc91880ede40b4c8bc0a4d7ee36f679a8a95c7c)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:51:15 AM: funny driving

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407402666824.gif%3Ft%3D1407911343&hash=8b89edb4b01d196bb7a7c8455aae1ce1839e04b9)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:52:15 AM: funny dragon ball z episode

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407415788144.gif%3Ft%3D1407911354&hash=c6defe99c5cfdc1eb615599abbaf7aa672698b4e)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:53:11 AM: funny video from ihop security cameras

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407543228226.gif%3Ft%3D1407911347&hash=42ee5fb1a7f023bb0035a4d032bd8f14539ab4b0)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:53:57 AM: funny escalator

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406910950215.gif%3Ft%3D1407911379&hash=96810b5777b32c9f630fa9dfd00f8b049a731887)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:54:35 AM: funny power ranger

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407471665309.gif%3Ft%3D1407911428&hash=d940dedd671d958e9da9f993da9abcdf4fa99b9f)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:55:25 AM: funny baseball

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407781470368.gif%3Ft%3D1407911413&hash=1a385530bcfa24937901e4beaf609f4e26bd3d44)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:56:10 AM: funny first date

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407678969673.gif%3Ft%3D1407911479&hash=d0219717505a4a9bbb14a8935b69f5c5d9593a73)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:57:31 AM: funny space

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407726140392.gif%3Ft%3D1407911472&hash=f550c73e99be5e7adb8f9a44eca4e3c15e239544)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:58:10 AM: funny christmas

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407910435482.gif%3Ft%3D1407911432&hash=aa09f191021e5bca6d4c3e300bb591a47873dbba)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 01:59:19 AM: funny colors

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1407767274350.gif%3Ft%3D1407911573&hash=8fdafe100361a0a674c3b7d55d9c44b1d1c044b7)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:00:46 AM: funny stadium

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406718083862.gif%3Ft%3D1407911495&hash=924ce5e2a3a9e4be626b49e6f9f0aa5fa04c52f2)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:01:21 AM: funny lizard

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406822514022.gif%3Ft%3D1407911529&hash=9a1f7402a5dcc9528eebd671c7a15ac9d1a741f4)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:02:25 AM: funny robot

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406750952390.gif%3Ft%3D1407911528&hash=fad0174e51aacf870f524fe97f54e548591e3770)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:03:04 AM: funny chess

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fkk122%2Fembassycassie%2F1406901868465.gif%3Ft%3D1407911523&hash=24e1260f45b502d143d2ef557bedec0ae72b973f)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:15:24 AM: www.google.com (http://www.google.com)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:16:35 AM: http://www.randmcnally.com/ (http://www.randmcnally.com/)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:20:12 AM: Google is an American multinational corporation specializing in Internet-related services and products. These include online advertising technologies, search, cloud computing, and software. Most of its profits are derived from AdWords.

Google was founded by Larry Page and Sergey Brin while they were Ph.D. students at Stanford University. Together they own about 14 percent of its shares but control 56 of the stockholder voting power through supervoting stock. They incorporated Google as a privately held company on September 4, 1998. An initial public offering followed on August 19, 2004. Its mission statement from the outset was "to organize the world's information and make it universally accessible and useful," and its unofficial slogan was "Don't be evil." In 2004, Google moved to headquarters in Mountain View, California, nicknamed the Googleplex.

Rapid growth since incorporation has triggered a chain of products, acquisitions and partnerships beyond Google's core search engine. It offers online productivity software including email (Gmail), a cloud storage service (Google Drive), an office suite (Google Docs) and a social networking service (Google+). Desktop products include applications for web browsing, organizing and editing photos, and instant messaging. The company leads the development of the Android mobile operating system and the browser-only Chrome OS for a netbook known as a Chromebook. Google has moved increasingly into communications hardware: it partners with major electronics manufacturers in the production of its "high-quality low-cost" Nexus devices and acquired Motorola Mobility in May 2012. In 2012, a fiber-optic infrastructure was installed in Kansas City to facilitate a Google Fiber broadband service.

The corporation has been estimated to run more than one million servers in data centers around the world (as of 2007) and to process over one billion search requests and about 24 petabytes of user-generated data each day (as of 2009). In December 2013 Alexa listed google.com as the most visited website in the world. Numerous Google sites in other languages figure in the top one hundred, as do several other Google-owned sites such as YouTube and Blogger. Its market dominance has led to prominent media coverage, including criticism of the company over issues such as copyright, censorship, and privacy.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:22:13 AM: Google began in January 1996 as a research project by Larry Page and Sergey Brin when they were both PhD students at Stanford University in Stanford, California.

While conventional search engines ranked results by counting how many times the search terms appeared on the page, the two theorized about a better system that analyzed the relationships between websites. They called this new technology PageRank; it determined a website's relevance by the number of pages, and the importance of those pages, that linked back to the original site.

A small search engine called "RankDex" from IDD Information Services designed by Robin Li was, since 1996, already exploring a similar strategy for site-scoring and page ranking. The technology in RankDex would be patented and used later when Li founded Baidu in China.

Page and Brin originally nicknamed their new search engine "BackRub", because the system checked backlinks to estimate the importance of a site. Eventually, they changed the name to Google, originating from a misspelling of the word "googol", the number one followed by one hundred zeros, which was picked to signify that the search engine was intended to provide large quantities of information. Originally, Google ran under Stanford University's website, with the domains google.stanford.edu and z.stanford.edu.

The domain name for Google was registered on September 15, 1997, and the company was incorporated on September 4, 1998. It was based in the garage of a friend (Susan Wojcicki) in Menlo Park, California. Craig Silverstein, a fellow PhD student at Stanford, was hired as the first employee.

In May 2011, the number of monthly unique visitors to Google surpassed one billion for the first time, an 8.4 percent increase from May 2010 (931 million). In January 2013, Google announced it had earned US$50 billion in annual revenue for the year of 2012. This marked the first time the company had reached this feat, topping their 2011 total of US$38 billion.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:23:32 AM: In 2013, Google ranked 5th in lobbying spending, up from 213th in 2003.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:24:05 AM: Since 2007, Google has aimed
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:24:30 AM: for carbon neutrality in regard to its operati
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:24:51 AM: ons.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:27:35 AM: I love it when people try to tell me that the SR-71 isn't the best aircraft ever made.

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.realestateouterbanks.org%2Fimages%2Fforeclosure_percentage_by_dollar_amount_854.jpg&hash=d4f928c2d4e0ff3da8ccf41169dbaf493cc0b461)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:30:32 AM: It's just like when people try to tell that strake wrenches aren't the best tool available for any handyman job.

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.psychologytoday.com%2Ffiles%2Fu736%2F86random-f1.1.gif&hash=6de8732f3ee1ca18913a25a6b962d154c1c12dc3)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:31:38 AM: You have been granted 3 wishes. What are they?
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:34:33 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:31:38 AM
You have been granted 3 wishes. What are they?

Good question J.

1. Marry Felicity Jones|||||||2. Make a key on the qwerty keyboard that makes a celtic love symbol|||||||3. Make it so that I can rhyme any word off the top of my head
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:35:04 AM: Terrible wishes J, you blew it.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:38:16 AM: I GOT LAID FOLLOWING THESE FOUR SIMPLE TIPS

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fididafunny.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F07%2Ffake-facts-8.jpg&hash=9a088c198dd99b3a7415eb369674c5f782a3cd61)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:38:52 AM: no u rough ridin' didn't you idiot
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM: (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:45:37 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy

I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older too
Well...

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older, too
Well I'm getting older too

So, take this love and take it down
Year and if you climb a mountain and ya turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well maybe
Well maybe
Well maybe the landslide will bring you down
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:46:25 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:45:37 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy

I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older too
Well...

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older, too
Well I'm getting older too

So, take this love and take it down
Year and if you climb a mountain and ya turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well maybe
Well maybe
Well maybe the landslide will bring you down

Literally what the eff is that?

-Randy
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:48:36 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:46:25 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:45:37 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy

I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older too
Well...

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older, too
Well I'm getting older too

So, take this love and take it down
Year and if you climb a mountain and ya turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well maybe
Well maybe
Well maybe the landslide will bring you down

Literally what the eff is that?

-Randy

oh wow that's pretty hostile.

i didn't realize i was gonna start my day out beating the crap out of some socksucker named "Randy". What kind of dumbass name is that? A dumbass one that is what.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:50:13 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:48:36 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:46:25 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:45:37 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy

I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older too
Well...

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older, too
Well I'm getting older too

So, take this love and take it down
Year and if you climb a mountain and ya turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well maybe
Well maybe
Well maybe the landslide will bring you down

Literally what the eff is that?

-Randy

oh wow that's pretty hostile.

i didn't realize i was gonna start my day out beating the crap out of some socksucker named "Randy". What kind of dumbass name is that? A dumbass one that is what.

Damn I just lost 100-0. Good game J you are superior alpha male.

-Randy
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 02:56:46 AM: Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:50:13 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:48:36 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:46:25 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:45:37 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:44:06 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:42:49 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:43 AM
Quote from: J on August 13, 2014, 02:41:02 AM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi39.tinypic.com%2F255jj8n.jpg&hash=0463414ba04d09c5650eaa34d1e6e05348984d53)

Good information thanks J

-Randy

Use it for business Randal

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rifftrax.com%2Ffiles%2Fimagecache%2Fproduct%2Ffiles%2FBobExec-design.png&hash=b96a0a3e52bf517deb2b9d331bbf0c203219af9c)

-Randy

I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older too
Well...

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Children get older
I'm getting older, too
Well I'm getting older too

So, take this love and take it down
Year and if you climb a mountain and ya turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide brought me down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well maybe
Well maybe
Well maybe the landslide will bring you down

Literally what the eff is that?

-Randy

oh wow that's pretty hostile.

i didn't realize i was gonna start my day out beating the crap out of some socksucker named "Randy". What kind of dumbass name is that? A dumbass one that is what.

Damn I just lost 100-0. Good game J you are superior alpha male.

-Randy

Righto Randy! You know who isn't alpha like me? This guy

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcache.bordom.net%2Fserver%2F%3Ftype%3Dimage%26amp%3Bsize%3Dfull%26amp%3Bid%3DaHR0cDovL2ltZzgzMi5pbWFnZXNoYWNrLnVzL2ltZzgzMi8yNDQ3LzEzMjczMTEyNDkwODguanBn&hash=28bda0c574a1b89dc1eb236ebd2267811bf30eb1)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: EllRobersonisInnocent on August 13, 2014, 02:57:41 AM: shut up
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 03:00:02 AM: I biked to the ETS campus, which was only about five miles away. Steve was in town for the week, so I warmed up with him, his 14-year-old host-family member Harry (no other way to really explain…), and our Asics rep Joe, who decided a few days before to run. The start line was really congested, mostly of runners I knew, which was funny and nice! One of them, however, was my former college teammate who just graduated in May, fresh off a good track season. I knew there was no chance in beating her but I figured I’d see how close I could stay. When the gun went off, Sara found me quickly and I was determined to run side by side with her, since we do a lot of times in workouts. The first mile felt really long…maybe because it included more than one uphill, downhill, and flat section. I hit mile 1 in 6:09 – quick, but I was okay with it. The second mile was pretty much all flat, but I settled in a little and ran 6:28. The final mile was part of the first mile again, and it was agreed upon by everyone that the uphill felt much harder the second time around…I could see my college friend up ahead the entire time, but she was too far to catch (she won, in eleventh overall, 19:12). I pushed as hard as I could for a 6:16 last mile and 47 seconds for the last 0.15 mi. to finish in 19:41, twelfth overall and second female. I was very pleased with my time and effort, especially under the conditions. It was a 16-second road PR, and of course it made me think that 5ks aren’t so bad, and I should do a flat, fast one someday…more on that another time.

(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fbuytaert.net%2Fsites%2Fbuytaert.net%2Ffiles%2Fcache%2Fchristmas-2011-interesting-tights-700x700.jpg&hash=2bd76a8b5e2b763fb09df6f361f61dd1e159d4bf)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 03:01:03 AM: (https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.avsmedia.com%2Fimages%2Fbig_icons%2FAudioEditor.gif&hash=fd4605cbc5571e50bc801e64f470a64c7e255f4f)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: J on August 13, 2014, 03:09:21 AM: good stuff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VAkOhXIsI0 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VAkOhXIsI0)
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Unruly on August 13, 2014, 07:56:50 AM: Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

:runaway:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: i poo crabs on September 02, 2014, 02:50:47 PM: 5 heart guys

Kansas-Sports.com
?@sportsinkansas
Think players from Kansas don't matter at the FBS level? Kansas State has 54 total KS players on roster, at least 25 played on Saturday.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: MadCat on September 02, 2014, 03:10:31 PM: Heard a local NAIA coach didn't think K-State would do too well this year on account of recruiting the same kids that he was after. :whistle1:
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on September 02, 2014, 04:24:49 PM: Quote from: MadCat on September 02, 2014, 03:10:31 PM
Heard a local NAIA coach didn't think K-State would do too well this year on account of recruiting the same kids that he was after. :whistle1:

Maybe he's just a shitty coach.
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: OK_Cat on September 02, 2014, 04:33:05 PM: More J less boring please
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: scottwildcat on September 02, 2014, 10:27:45 PM: Just caught up in this thread. J went nuts
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: slobber on September 03, 2014, 07:46:00 AM: Quote from: scottwildcat on September 02, 2014, 10:27:45 PM
Just caught up in this thread. J went nuts
sw, I promise I will never do this in dobber family soccer thread...good or bad.

Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Looks Like Our Lazy Walkon KS Kids Are Being Lazy Again
Post by: Ich.Gewinne on September 03, 2014, 08:10:16 PM: Quote from: scottwildcat on September 02, 2014, 10:27:45 PM
Just caught up in this thread. J went nuts

:emawkid: