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General Discussion => Essentially Flyertalk => Topic started by: AppleJack on November 06, 2010, 01:05:21 PM

Title: Serious Question....
Post by: AppleJack on November 06, 2010, 01:05:21 PM
Would you kill a gerbil with your bare hands for $100 cash?
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: steve dave on November 06, 2010, 01:06:26 PM
no, I wouldn't kill it with anything else either
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: TBL on November 06, 2010, 01:07:32 PM
Nope. Had em as a kid. I'm sure there are others on this board who would do other things with a gerbil for less than $100.   :ohno:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: KSU_foo on November 06, 2010, 01:09:47 PM
No.  I used to make mazes for mine out of video tapes when I was growing up.  Then, one got loose in our garage and survived off of a pumpkin we never carved.  Never could find the little stinker until he ate so much of the pumpkin he got inside of it and made it his home. 
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: MeatSauce on November 06, 2010, 01:11:09 PM
 :users:  <--- watching the creepos come out in this thread
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: steve dave on November 06, 2010, 01:11:35 PM
No.  I used to make mazes for mine out of video tapes when I was growing up.  Then, one got loose in our garage and survived off of a pumpkin we never carved.  Never could find the little stinker until he ate so much of the pumpkin he got inside of it and made it his home. 

This is an amazing gerbil story fwiw.  Living in a pumpkin..lol, that crafty sob.  
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: KSU_foo on November 06, 2010, 01:14:42 PM
No.  I used to make mazes for mine out of video tapes when I was growing up.  Then, one got loose in our garage and survived off of a pumpkin we never carved.  Never could find the little stinker until he ate so much of the pumpkin he got inside of it and made it his home. 

This is an amazing gerbil story fwiw.  Living in a pumpkin..lol, that crafty sob.  

Yep.  He was happy to be reunited with Lloyd (his name was Harry).  We even put part of the pumpkin in their cage with them...just so he didn't get homesick. 
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: steve dave on November 06, 2010, 01:20:37 PM
No.  I used to make mazes for mine out of video tapes when I was growing up.  Then, one got loose in our garage and survived off of a pumpkin we never carved.  Never could find the little stinker until he ate so much of the pumpkin he got inside of it and made it his home. 

This is an amazing gerbil story fwiw.  Living in a pumpkin..lol, that crafty sob.  

Yep.  He was happy to be reunited with Lloyd (his name was Harry).  We even put part of the pumpkin in their cage with them...just so he didn't get homesick. 

man oh man.  I bet those lovable bastards had some adventures. 
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: pissclams on November 06, 2010, 01:23:37 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on November 06, 2010, 01:49:20 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.


no doubt. the most that i've ever been offered to kill a gerbil was fifty dollars and that was in canada so you have to factor in the exchange rate. most money for a non-canada gerbil killing that i've been offered was only twenty or twenty five. i can't remember for sure. needless to say, one hundred dollars is a figment of your rough ridin' imagination. nobody in the real world offers that. not even close. stop with the bullshit because nobody is believing this bullshit one hundred dollar gerbil contract killing story that you are trying to put out there. just rough ridin' unbelievable what some people around here will type and think that people will believe. i've literally seen it all now.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: TBL on November 06, 2010, 01:53:16 PM
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi717.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fww173%2Fprestonjjrtr%2FSmileys%2F1sm462smiliewheel-1.gif&hash=43c7b4133b59185625d604527defbfbdfc93648b)


Applejack in motion.....
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Joker on November 06, 2010, 02:42:14 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.

Maybe he's confused.  AppleJack, are you sure they didn't mean a hamster?
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: AppleJack on November 06, 2010, 02:50:22 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.

Maybe he's confused.  AppleJack, are you sure they didn't mean a hamster?

Nope. I was offered $100 cold hard cash to kill my nieces gerbil and make it look like a suicide.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: TBL on November 06, 2010, 02:53:29 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.

Maybe he's confused.  AppleJack, are you sure they didn't mean a hamster?

Nope. I was offered $100 cold hard cash to kill my nieces gerbil and make it look like a suicide.


 :horrorsurprise:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: wetwillie on November 06, 2010, 04:08:37 PM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.

Maybe he's confused.  AppleJack, are you sure they didn't mean a hamster?

Nope. I was offered $100 cold hard cash to kill my nieces gerbil and make it look like a suicide.
(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ft1.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AANd9GcSt7q8himiYOssYGZlB9x0Is6GHWbFtZ9mupJYZg8NewoGoowU%26amp%3Bt%3D1%26amp%3Busg%3D__qdHj-PhY3vaSuviE2QyFXo8XJkc%3D&hash=acd2b822fac8888bf619e0bb692c67a6be479fb7)

Better not take the hit, they may have paid this gerbil $200 to make your death look like a suicide :ohno:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: jtksu on November 06, 2010, 04:42:57 PM
The most important question here is:  Does the gerbil deserve to die?  If he's some sort of serious SOB, like a rapist or a baby gerbil molester...  Otherwise, I would seriously recommend you think long and hard before taking that rodent's life.  You'll most likely end up like some sort of Vietnam vet, plagued with guilt and living in a dumpster.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: ChiComCat on November 06, 2010, 04:50:45 PM
How the eff did KSU_foo's gerbil story gem not end up in the amazing animal stories thread?  Probably wouldve won the thread
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: CNS on November 06, 2010, 05:13:20 PM
Would you kill a gerbil with your bare hands for $100 cash?

applejack,  use your head.  who needs a dead gerbil? no one.  who needs a live gerbil?  lots of parents who's kid's gerbil just died.   Get a craigs list ad to trade a live one for a closely matching dead one.  boom, your niece's gerbil looks like it died, some other kid gets her gerbil, you get money.  win-win-win.

you're welcome.  you owe me $50.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: sys on November 06, 2010, 09:06:31 PM
definitely.  have killed better rodents for less.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: KSU_foo on November 06, 2010, 10:01:51 PM
How the eff did KSU_foo's gerbil story gem not end up in the amazing animal stories thread?  Probably wouldve won the thread

Pffft!  I'm an idiot....completely forgot about that thread.  :embarrassed:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: steve dave on November 06, 2010, 10:31:43 PM
definitely.  have killed better rodents for less.

best and most serious response
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: jtksu on November 06, 2010, 10:48:41 PM
Pretty sure I've never seen that word before.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Pexikan on November 07, 2010, 03:41:46 AM
funny that you think you can kill a gerbil for some money.  you're a joke applejack.

Maybe he's confused.  AppleJack, are you sure they didn't mean a hamster?

Nope. I was offered $100 cold hard cash to kill my nieces gerbil and make it look like a suicide.

Your brother (or sister) has beef with a gerbil???  Next question, how would you even kill it to make it look like a SUICIDE???? What? Leave a suicide note behind....
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: jtksu on November 07, 2010, 11:49:11 AM
Good luck forging a gerbil's signature. 
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: AppleJack on March 05, 2011, 11:02:11 PM
I've learned a lot in this thread. I respect the crap out of 'clamz  :gocho:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Tobias on March 05, 2011, 11:08:46 PM
Would kill the gerbil, take the hundo, then kick Gere in the shins and take the 10 Gs that fall out.  Maybe throw dead gerbil #1 at Gere :)
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: ChiComCat on March 06, 2011, 07:19:56 AM
Looking back on this thread, probably coulda blackmailed the family member for more money once the deed was done.  I'll bet you could've easily gotten $150, or at least $100 plus a quality 6 pack
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: HeinBallz on March 07, 2011, 03:11:41 PM
so how did this work out?   
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: The1BigWillie on March 08, 2011, 03:15:04 PM
so how did this work out?   

http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/crime-courts/suspect-in-gerbil-shooting-is-most-wanted-1.1086555 (http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/crime-courts/suspect-in-gerbil-shooting-is-most-wanted-1.1086555)

He didn't use his bare hands...  :horrorsurprise:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Fedor on March 08, 2011, 06:45:03 PM
No need to get your hands dirty, put the little bugger's cage next to a car exhaust pipe and start it up.  It is actually a pretty painless way to go.  Some kid back in my home town offed himself this way accidentally.  He was mildly 'tarded and his parents left him home one time.  He was supposed to get himself to school but was afraid he would be late.  So he sets his alarm, gets up and ready but was early so he gets in the car with his pillow, starts it up and goes to sleep.  Never wakes up.  Too bad cause he just got accepted to law school. 

But yeah, to be able to kill without guilt or hesitation is one of the best skills you can acquire.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: john "teach me how to" dougie on March 08, 2011, 06:54:47 PM
No need to get your hands dirty, put the little bugger's cage next to a car exhaust pipe and start it up.  It is actually a pretty painless way to go.  Some kid back in my home town offed himself this way accidentally.  He was mildly 'tarded and his parents left him home one time.  He was supposed to get himself to school but was afraid he would be late.  So he sets his alarm, gets up and ready but was early so he gets in the car with his pillow, starts it up and goes to sleep.  Never wakes up.  Too bad cause he just got accepted to law school

But yeah, to be able to kill without guilt or hesitation is one of the best skills you can acquire.

ku law?
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Ira Hayes on March 09, 2011, 06:55:15 PM
Chick could face up to 2 years in jail for killing a hamster: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110309/ap_on_re_us/us_hamster_death_arrest_1

Serious (but totally hypothetical  :dubious:) question:  If I catch rabbits that are eating the plants in my back yard in a live trap and then drown them and throw them in the trash, will I go to jail?

I can still kill mice and rats in whatever fashion I see fit, can't I?   :bracketmouse:
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: wetwillie on March 09, 2011, 07:36:21 PM
Chick could face up to 2 years in jail for killing a hamster: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110309/ap_on_re_us/us_hamster_death_arrest_1

Serious (but totally hypothetical  :dubious:) question:  If I catch rabbits that are eating the plants in my back yard in a live trap and then drown them and throw them in the trash, will I go to jail?

I can still kill mice and rats in whatever fashion I see fit, can't I?   :bracketmouse:

you are one sick eff
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: AppleJack on March 09, 2011, 07:37:41 PM
Chick could face up to 2 years in jail for killing a hamster: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110309/ap_on_re_us/us_hamster_death_arrest_1

Serious (but totally hypothetical  :dubious:) question:  If I catch rabbits that are eating the plants in my back yard in a live trap and then drown them and throw them in the trash, will I go to jail?

I can still kill mice and rats in whatever fashion I see fit, can't I?   :bracketmouse:

No. Bunnies are adorable. Can't even believe you would ask us this. Some posters on this board are just monsters.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: jtksu on March 09, 2011, 10:19:13 PM
I once adopted a warren of rabbits for the summer.  Made a little fence thing to keep my dogs away from them.  Got a soft spot for small animals, that aren't fish.  Fish can suck my balls.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: the KHAN! on March 09, 2011, 10:30:23 PM
Fish can suck my balls.

I know you didn't mean it this way....but I think they probably can!
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: HeinBallz on March 10, 2011, 11:49:59 AM
pretty sure most city ordinances make it illegal to trap any non-vermin animal.  Even if you are trapping in Kansas, you need a fur bearing license.   But honestly, dude, instead of killing bunnies, try some deterrents. I've heard moth balls spread around a garden keep most animals away.  Worth a shot, no?
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Joker on March 11, 2011, 11:54:35 AM
pretty sure most city ordinances make it illegal to trap any non-vermin animal.  Even if you are trapping in Kansas, you need a fur bearing license.   But honestly, dude, instead of killing bunnies, try some deterrents. I've heard moth balls spread around a garden keep most animals away.  Worth a shot, no?

Poison is another good alternative.  If you're lucky, they'll be in some other person's yard when they kick it.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: Ira Hayes on March 11, 2011, 02:29:06 PM
Couldn't figure out if killing bunnies was illegal or not so I called the Conservation Dept.

The first thing they told me was that rabbit season is over.  I said, "No, I don't want to hunt them.  I want to kill them because they are eating all my plants." I was told "that is a touchy subject" but I was given permission to trap them and release them in a city park.

I'd rather do that anyway.  I don't enjoy killing animals. So I didn't push the issue to get a definitive answer.

The legality of killing these evil rodents is still sketchy.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: sys on March 11, 2011, 05:23:30 PM
Couldn't figure out if killing bunnies was illegal or not so I called the Conservation Dept.

The first thing they told me was that rabbit season is over.  I said, "No, I don't want to hunt them.  I want to kill them because they are eating all my plants." I was told "that is a touchy subject" but I was given permission to trap them and release them in a city park.

I'd rather do that anyway.  I don't enjoy killing animals. So I didn't push the issue to get a definitive answer.

The legality of killing these evil rodents is still sketchy.

not rodents.  also not legal, but wgaf?


anyone that wants small mammals killed for a reasonable fee can drop me a pm, btw.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: yoga-like_abana on March 11, 2011, 05:25:48 PM
whew GPC can rest easy, next time someone is looking for somebody to kill a small mammal for a reasonable fee, we'll know just the guy.
Title: Re: Serious Question....
Post by: sys on March 11, 2011, 05:48:41 PM
whew GPC can rest easy, next time someone is looking for somebody to kill a small mammal for a reasonable fee, we'll know just the guy.

booyah mammal killers, inc.