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TITLETOWN - A Decade Long Celebration Of The Greatest Achievement In College Athletics History => Kansas State Football => Topic started by: hemmy on January 20, 2011, 09:06:57 PM
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This will be the official list thread.
1. Being old
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2. Going to Golden Corral before 5 PM
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death
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Collecting Social Security
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Watching Matlock
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4. Signing ** recruits
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"What do the old people teach us but how to die?" - Say Anything
Very profound.
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shitting themselves
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Hiring all of your old friends so you can work for twelve hours and then play backgammon for the next four hours
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Eating Apple Sauce
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eating soup, playing bridge
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Stealing money because they know people won't say anything because they are old.
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smelling weird and growing ear hairs
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complaining. i had a good period of time where i was around old people a lot. they like to complain. and bitch. bitch and complain. trust me here. nobody beats them at this.
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Hating minorities.
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Using Tom Kruse's Hoveround.
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Manufacturing Werther's Originals out of thin air.
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Knitting and sleeping
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being racist.
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killing athletic departments
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Hating minorities.
wouldn't that fall under being racists?
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wouldn't that fall under being racists?
Nah. They're just people that haven't grown into their age yet.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
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ruining crap.
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Paying in exact change and holding up the line while they search their purses/coin bags in order to do so.
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Alerting people near them as to how expensive goods/services are.
Also purchasing multiple identical items that carry no-fault lifetime guarantees.
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Manifesting coinage in the various cranial orifices of youngsters.
Calling kids youngsters.
Being cheap.
Being grumpy.
Calling middle-aged people the future of America.
Outfoxing that wily Grim Reaper.
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paying for everything with checks.
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1. Helping you move and carrying twice as much down to the van as the two young punks you hired (who keep stopping to pant and gasp and say, "Man, I need some water").
2. Humiliating the high school cross-country team at last year's 5K for charity.
3. Dazzling young hotties you couldn't bone because they have daddy issues and the having sex with them ... well.
4. Working the room at fund-raisers.
5. Taking all of the students in their Thursday Night seminar down to Aggieville after class and buying the first round.
6. Paying for the beer when their favorite team is in the Super Bowl.
7. Maintaining a golf handicap that is always 3 strokes better than yours.
Sorry, but I guess I hang out with a different class of "old person."
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"What do the old people teach us but how to die?" - Say Anything
Very profound.
Love this post.
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sending cash or checks for missed/skipped holidays or bdays via snail mail.
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sending me a 5 dollar check for christmas. :chainsaw: :chainsaw: :chainsaw:
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sending me a 5 dollar check for christmas. :chainsaw: :chainsaw: :chainsaw:
:lol: :lol:
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lying
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
Pete wins
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murdering innocent people with their grand mariners
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
Wow. Spot on.
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Handing out pieces of men's jewelry in exchange for positive media exposure.
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Handing out pieces of men's jewelry in exchange for positive media exposure.
Hey, old people with men's jewelry, pm me and we'll get this positive media exposure train rolling. I've already lined up a guy to resize stuff for me.
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Having faces that look like a mouse and chewing gum a lot.
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2. Going to Golden Corral before 5 PM
I'm thinking the senior lunch discount ends at 3 PM :lick:
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Sleeping. Old people take 2-3 naps a day. They go to bed by 9:00 and wake up at 6:00 every day to go complain about the coffee at a local restaurant.
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"mature" porn
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Handing out pieces of men's jewelry in exchange for positive media exposure.
Hey, old people with men's jewelry, pm me and we'll get this positive media exposure train rolling. I've already lined up a guy to resize stuff for me.
Remember to scratch their names off and replace them with your own.
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Make sure it's jewelry tied to events that you and no one you're affiliated with participated in.
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trying to pass their 14 year old grandkid off as a "kid" on "kids eat free night"
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Handing out pieces of men's jewelry in exchange for positive media exposure.
Hey, old people with men's jewelry, pm me and we'll get this positive media exposure train rolling. I've already lined up a guy to resize stuff for me.
Remember to scratch their names off and replace them with your own.
Well yeah. I'm actually having a new "Trim" logo designed for it. Unfortunately, I haven't received a single pm yet. Not sure if there's no old people here reading this or if wabash was wrong about the stereotype. :dunno:
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1. Helping you move and carrying twice as much down to the van as the two young punks you hired (who keep stopping to pant and gasp and say, "Man, I need some water").
2. Humiliating the high school cross-country team at last year's 5K for charity.
3. Dazzling young hotties you couldn't bone because they have daddy issues and the having sex with them ... well.
4. Working the room at fund-raisers.
5. Taking all of the students in their Thursday Night seminar down to Aggieville after class and buying the first round.
6. Paying for the beer when their favorite team is in the Super Bowl.
7. Maintaining a golf handicap that is always 3 strokes better than yours.
Sorry, but I guess I hang out with a different class of "old person."
Awww, you had your grandkid teach you how to use the internet... That's precious...
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1. Helping you move and carrying twice as much down to the van as the two young punks you hired (who keep stopping to pant and gasp and say, "Man, I need some water").
2. Humiliating the high school cross-country team at last year's 5K for charity.
3. Dazzling young hotties you couldn't bone because they have daddy issues and the having sex with them ... well.
4. Working the room at fund-raisers.
5. Taking all of the students in their Thursday Night seminar down to Aggieville after class and buying the first round.
6. Paying for the beer when their favorite team is in the Super Bowl.
7. Maintaining a golf handicap that is always 3 strokes better than yours.
Sorry, but I guess I hang out with a different class of "old person."
Awww, you had your grandkid teach you how to use the internet... That's precious...
Not exactly, but I did teach the above "old people" how to use the internet.
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When it comes to having discussions about Social Security and the weather, nobody does it better than old people. NOBODY.
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having big bumpy noses and ears.
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Writing big mother rough ridin' checks to the mother rough ridin'[b] MIKE AHEARN FUND[/b]. How Bout You ?
Oh yeah, pretty rough ridin' good at
TUCKIN IN MY SHIRT !
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Writing big mother rough ridin' checks to the mother rough ridin'[b] MIKE AHEARN FUND[/b]. How Bout You ?
Oh yeah, pretty rough ridin' good at
TUCKIN IN MY SHIRT !
lol
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Being greedy
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I have not received a single PM from an old person offering me any form of jewelry. I will take this into account in my future posts.
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I have not received a single PM from an old person offering me any form of jewelry. I will take this into account in my future posts.
My great grand-dad has a male genitals ring he might be persuaded to part with.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
lol
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
Ring? Necklace? I could be talked into your way of thinking.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
Shitty posting without knowing they are shitty.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
Ring? Necklace? I could be talked into your way of thinking.
You talk like you're one of the young'ums, T. I've seen you--you're a midlife crisis waiting to happen.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
Ring? Necklace? I could be talked into your way of thinking.
You talk like you're one of the young'ums, T. I've seen you--you're a midlife crisis waiting to happen.
Mrs. Cattmatt!?
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:popcorn:
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
Ring? Necklace? I could be talked into your way of thinking.
You talk like you're one of the young'ums, T. I've seen you--you're a midlife crisis waiting to happen.
Mrs. Cattmatt!?
If so, you've really pissed her off now by not including the "Esq.".
NXL, say hi next time. I'll autograph your Empire Strikes Back tape.
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:popcorn:
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Writing reviews on IMDB that no one reads.
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Telling stories over and over that no one wants to hear. Related - They have a story about EVERYone, or they'll make one.
Drinking coffee regardless of what time it is.
Being adorable (not all of them, but there are some -- since this isn't a thread that ALL old people are good at).
Playing ridiculous card games. Like ones that you don't really win or lose, or take 5 hours and it only matters who wins the last game. And, wasting time in general.
Not pm-ing Trim.
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Teabagging the toilet water.
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Having horrible broccoli farts.
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1. Drinking hooch or beer that you would never touch.
2. Talking about the weather...constantly.
3. Grabbing my arm and saying "SIR!?" when I said something they can't hear.
4. Walking slowly in front of mobs of people.
5. Driving slowly in front of mobs of people.
6. Being racist (only really applies to KU fans)
7. Crowding the $3 blackjack tables at the Golden Eagle Casino
8. Having burst capillaries in their nose and face.
9. Standing at military attention and/or saluting the flag during the national anthem.
10. Calling every video game a "Nintendo"
GRANDPARENTS SECTION:
11. Making you eat disgusting crap, like "borscht" when all you really want is a PB&J
12. Getting mad when you lock the door to any room in the house
13. Making you pick out a video game to rent that "you and your brother can play together"
14. Making you "go outside and play" when all you really want to do is play video games
15. Not letting you do things your parents would normally let you do
16. Changing their names multiple times upon entering the country thus making it nearly impossible to track their lineage
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
"What young people are good at"
1. Standing on lawns.
2. Oblivious to the things that would make them productive members of society, and wasting time that could be spent in professional or educational pursuits. --> :drink:
3. Making posts about other people, not realizing it is a transparent view into their own fears, ignorance, prejudice, and general insecurity about who they are and where they fit in society...
4. Tricking dumb old people into signing up and posting on their bbs'ing website.
Cheer up. You'll grow up eventually.
fyp
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1. Drinking hooch or beer that you would never touch. OLD MILWAUKEE. :frown:
2. Talking about the weather...constantly.
3. Grabbing my arm and saying "SIR!?" when I said something they can't hear.
4. Walking slowly in front of mobs of people.
5. Driving slowly in front of mobs of people.
6. Being racist (only really applies to KU fans)
7. Crowding the $3 blackjack tables at the Golden Eagle Casino
8. Having burst capillaries in their nose and face.
9. Standing at military attention and/or saluting the flag during the national anthem.
10. Calling every video game a "Nintendo"
GRANDPARENTS SECTION:
11. Making you eat disgusting crap, like "borscht" when all you really want is a PB&J
12. Getting mad when you lock the door to any room in the house
13. Making you pick out a video game to rent that "you and your brother can play together"
14. Making you "go outside and play" when all you really want to do is play video games
15. Not letting you do things your parents would normally let you do
16. Changing their names multiple times upon entering the country thus making it nearly impossible to track their lineage
I think 1 and 8 go hand in hand.
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
This is sheer genius.....and I say this as an "official old person" who just qualified for Medicare.
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Old people are good at selling robot insurance to other older people. How can we get Bill a job selling robot insurance?
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complaining about those new fake curly-q light bulbs
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Old people are good at selling robot insurance to other older people. How can we get Bill a job selling robot insurance?
Stanbot? :dunno:
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Forwarding email
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Sharing a facebook account with their spouse
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Hiring gypsies to not clean their house.
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Old people are good at selling robot insurance to other older people. How can we get Bill a job selling robot insurance?
Stanbot? :dunno:
You may be on to something. Consuming copious amounts of prescription drugs is likely the only explanation for Stanbot's infinite optimism.
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buying American and bitching about things made in China
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buying American and bitching about things made in China
Using racial slurs when bitching about things made in China.
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buying American and bitching about things made in China
Using racial slurs when bitching about things made in China.
"Orientals"
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Sharing a facebook account with their spouse
this infuriates me for some reason that i havent quite figured out yet
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joining polar bear clubs so they can call youngsters pansies
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This will be the official list thread.
1. Being old
Coaching basketball at San Diego State :dunno:
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Guys, we're all gonna be old someday. This thread is kinda getting depressing. :frown:
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Guys, we're all gonna be old someday. This thread is kinda getting depressing. :frown:
Yeah, well being old is kind of depressing.
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Maybe I won't get old if I never become good at any of these things.
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Maybe I won't get old if I never become good at any of these things.
Good point. I'm gonna try and do the same.
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Maybe I won't get old if I never become good at any of these things.
Good point. I'm gonna try and do the same.
If old people weren't good at any of these things, then they would be good at absolutely nothing.
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Thinking their loser kid/grandkid isn't actually a loser.
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worrying about not over tipping/not tipping.
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(https://goemaw.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F5.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com%2F97%2F25%2F64e80a160a9844212838f1e02b2f270a.jpg&hash=026f512bfaacb6f6591bebdeef1f7120ce0a425c)
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1) Running in to the back of my car at interstate speeds with their Buick leaving me with a lifetime of migraine headaches.
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Precision parking thanks to bumpers.
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Coaching football.
:cool:
Purple, get ready to roll.
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Coaching football.
:cool:
Purple, get ready to roll.
Why don't you go tuck in your shirt or something!
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Obsessing over taxes
Feeling remorseful for squandering a lifetime of relationships with family and tossing shallow monetary benefits towards them in attempt to make amends...despite the obvious futility
Failing to recognize when they are loosing their capabilities in professional pursuits
Unable to change ingrained patterns that are ineffective and even destructive
Frightened of new technologies and quickly dismissive of their benefits
Understanding the difference between Loosing and Losing their capabilities.
Congrats though on the proper use of their. :cheers:
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Being in Viagra/Cialis/Levitra and ExTenze ads.
Asking midgets where the rest of them is.
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Flirting with the waitress at Outback Steakhouse better than you can.
:cry:
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Being in Viagra/Cialis/Levitra and ExTenze ads.
hediq :fatty: