My sincere hope is that Trump re-makes the Republican National Convention as a star studded prime time must see entertainment event.
Caitlin comes out in a white ball gown and starts a speech:
"I've been a proud Republican for 45 years. Today, I'd like to talk about why there is only one person I can support in this race. There is going to be a lot of talk about women's issues in this campaign, so lets introduce some women that are part of the Republican family!"
Crowd cheers!
Lights go dark
Video montage begins
It is Phyllis Schlafly appears on the screen: "Men should stop treating feminists like ladies, and instead treat them like the men they say they want to be."
Spotlight stage left as Phyllis appears waving triumphantly and joining Caitlin at center stage.
Laura Bush sitting politely in a wingback chair, book on her lap talking to children. "We can overcome evil with greater good."
Spotlight stage right, she appears and waves smiles and walks to flank Caitlin.
The dignitaries continue to appear until they are all lined up 20 Republican dignitaries when the outrageous Cuban rhythms of Gloria Estefan overwhelm the loud cheers and the spotlights go crazy. Gloria is being lowered on to the stage and the sea of Republican women part to show a mysterious woman dressed as the Chiquita banana lady!
IT'S TED CRUZ DANCING HIS ASS OFF!
The ladies start a conga line around the stage until Gloria's number hits the third chorus (only 2 verses and then everyone stops and poses for the thunderous, sweaty applause)
Suddenly, Tony Bennet starts crooning about New York and a mysterious woman emerges again, IT'S RUDY!!
A second number! For the final Chorus of "NEW YORK!" Trump appears with his blonde menagerie of family and former lovers and the entire stage explodes in bright lights.
The curtain starts to close, but the crowd is having none of it. Trump emerges and announces a special encore, he talked it over with them and they've agreed. Ted and Rudy are going to mud wrestle in drag.
The crowd roars and the night's entertainment continues.