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Sports => Snyder's Electronic Cyber Space World => Topic started by: Saulbadguy on February 09, 2007, 04:08:56 PM

Title: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: Saulbadguy on February 09, 2007, 04:08:56 PM
http://mbd.scout.com/mb.aspx?S=172&F=2485&STO=pagestart#S=172&F=2485&T=100367&FIX=1

KSU recruiting excellence!

As many of you natives well know, the state is buzzing with excitement about the amazing recruiting class that the dapper mastermind, Ron Prince, selected to come and play at the highest levels of college football in scenic and aromatic Manhattan , Kansas ! Usually, I can recognize any ku jayhawkee fan that comes within 20 paces of me. As with most Wildcat heroes, my senses senses are honed to perfection though great discipline in order to fully enjoy KSU football excitement. Still, the ungifted can still come to quickly recognize a Jayhawkee in the immediate vicinity:

1. Sight: Most ku fans are homely and unfashionably dressed like third world hobos. Unlike third world hobo's, the Jayhawker doesn't miss too many meals and are oafish and bulbous.
2. Scent: Diluted Drakkar mixed with Swisher Sweet scent means a jayhwkee frat dude is in the vicinity - watch your drinks!
3. Mental: the elusive 6th sense tells us through the shiver in the spine that we will soon be hearing about November through February basketball games without acknowledgement of officiating bias.

These days, though, I can recognize the Jayhawk fan by the rich pudding of envy dripping in the tone of their voice when inquiring about the future athletes who will wear the PowerCat emblem with great pride. What you inquire about and fear is true: future champions are indeed being brought to Manhattan ! A veritable dream team of football prospects focusing on core elements such as the speed of gazelles, the strength of mature hybrid gorillas, the agility of a gnat on a July afternoon, and the football savvy of one legendary Steve Grogan. Excellent young men of character, charisma, and scholastic aptitude across the board as well. Jealous? Indeed you are!

If I were pressed to pick one favorite, it would probably be Lamark Brown. He was one of the most sought after recruits in the nation and is versatile enough to play any skill position on the field. He aspires to greatness and knew that Coach Prince was the best option due to his great teaching and motivational strengths so apparent with young superstars like Josh Freeman and Jordy Nelson. He will probably start at receiver, so I am sure your defensive backs are already a little concerned and we're nine months away from playing. What cowards! I believe Mark Mangino tried to recruit Lamark as well, but he was probably repelled by the fact your coach's has 64% body fat on his pumpkin head alone -and the poor quality of a ku education is no selling point either.

Gary Chandler is another of my favorites after my research and review. If he can make the step up to KSU quality football without being awed by the superior facilities in Manhattan , the higher level of competition for positions with so many gifted teammates, and the amazing and moving music of the Wildcat marching band, he has an all-American future. Fantastic!

Not trusting the politically motivated ranking sources like rivals or scout, I devised my own rankings for our conference.

1. KSU - A lot of players and all of them great prospects. I rated 16 of them as 5 star level talent this season. Amazing!
2. Texas - Mack Brown picking it up to try and compete with KSU. Wants to keep it a bit closer this year and now knows what it takes. I rate 2 5 star guys.
3. Oklahoma - Looks like continued cheating in Norman . A handful of 4 stars.
4. Oklahoma State - More cheating, only  a little bit less as 1,000,000 Sooner villains just slight more $ than Booner Pickens. One five star and loaded with 3's.
5. Texas A&M - lots of interesting stuff going on with this recruiting class.
6. Texas Tech - Down because of fewer players taken. One recruiting weekend ruined when several recruits eaten by sand worms looking for spice.
7. Iowa State - McCarney run out of town as coaching victim #1 of the new era of Prince-sperity. Unknowing junior college players duped to come in and get pounded by Wildcats for the foreseeable future.
8. Colorado - Good job building a line to protect the coach's kid. I wish Prince had a kid that would play for the Wildcats. What an on the field leader he would be! He would probably recruit elite opposing players right during the game action.
9. Missouri - Several in-state players improved greatly just by competing against Lamark Brown. College will only get easier for them (except when they play the Wildcats of course - Superb!).
10. Nebraska - Forced to rely on shady junior college players again. I have nothing higher here then 2 3 stars and then 10 2 stars. KSU took their state's best this season.
11. Kansas - Of the 4 decent recruits, 3 of them were probably duped into thinking they were going to K-State. Shameful! Football Saturday's in Lawrence look to remain dull and depressing for your fans.
12. Baylor - Baptist missionaries would have more success in Iran than trying to get someone to play football at Baylor.

I hope this addresses all of your recruiting questions/concerns better than this disappointing pay site. EMAW
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: michigancat on February 09, 2007, 04:14:30 PM
NIce.

Never seen an SPC recruiting post.  I like it.
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: waks on February 09, 2007, 04:22:26 PM
What literary genius.
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: ChiefCatchacold on February 09, 2007, 05:15:13 PM
"Brevity is the soul of wit"

 :bs:
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: Super PurpleCat on February 10, 2007, 08:56:30 AM
The fake me is better than me.
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: cireksu on February 10, 2007, 11:39:17 AM
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 Posted on 2/9/2007 4:22 PM    Nominate Post | Report Post

Re: KSU recruiting excellence!   

Holy crap, that was hilarious!

I never seen anybody parody a K-State poster that well!

What, he was serious?

Cheers,
NJ Hawk
 

lold
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: michigancat on February 10, 2007, 11:45:41 AM
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Posted on 2/10/2007 10:39 AM        
Re: KSU recruiting excellence!
I am trying to figure out which board you cut-and-pasted from and just swapped K-State for the actual team.  OU?  OSU?  Maybe A&M?

Hack.

***********************
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: cireksu on February 10, 2007, 12:12:44 PM
lol, that really made their blood pressure rise.
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: Bookcat on February 12, 2007, 10:09:55 AM
Quote
11. Kansas - Of the 4 decent recruits, 3 of them were probably duped into thinking they were going to K-State.

HAHAH
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: frankencat on February 12, 2007, 10:38:56 AM
The fake me is better than me.


I'm hoping your girlfriend doesn't feel this way
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: Super PurpleCat on February 12, 2007, 10:44:40 PM
It's ok, she knows I feel that way about her.   :dancin:
Title: Re: Fake SuperPurpleCat returns to Phog.net!
Post by: AzCat on February 13, 2007, 12:10:34 AM
The fake me is better than me.

I'm hoping your girlfriend doesn't feel this way

Yours does too, especially if the fake you requires batteries.   :tongue: