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General Discussion => Essentially Flyertalk => Topic started by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 08:14:19 AM

Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 08:14:19 AM
I'll start: box of chocolates with a huge balloon attached that says "I'm Sorry" delivered to office that sits on guards desk unclaimed all day.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 08:16:25 AM
a tin of christmas popcorn sitting on a table from 2011
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on May 30, 2013, 08:24:15 AM
a tin of christmas popcorn sitting on a table from 2011

oh man, that crap would not fly at my office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EllToPay on May 30, 2013, 08:26:00 AM
Unnamed, healthy employee who takes the elevator up to her floor every day.

It's a two story building.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: hatingfrancisco on May 30, 2013, 08:31:16 AM
somebody wrote "Pussy" in pencil under the "Eaton" decals on all the electrical boxes.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 08:36:28 AM
somebody wrote "Pussy" in pencil under the "Eaton" decals on all the electrical boxes.

lol. crap would not fly here.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 08:58:13 AM
A very loud and exciting phone call expressing congratulations for using the bathroom. A very loud call rescheduling their toddler yoga class. (same person).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on May 30, 2013, 09:00:27 AM
Politically correct sexual harassment poster

(http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l278/felixrex/0629091304-1.jpg)
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: raquetcat on May 30, 2013, 09:05:23 AM
A very loud and exciting phone call expressing congratulations for using the bathroom. A very loud call rescheduling their toddler yoga class. (same person).
Toddler yoga? I think that needs to go in the San Francisco things thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on May 30, 2013, 09:09:58 AM
Politically correct sexual harassment poster

(http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l278/felixrex/0629091304-1.jpg)

Fred Hoiberg would get sexually harrassed.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 09:10:18 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 30, 2013, 09:16:20 AM
Politically correct sexual harassment poster

(http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l278/felixrex/0629091304-1.jpg)

PC really blurs the lines btwn perks and abuse.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 30, 2013, 09:18:38 AM
Politically correct sexual harassment poster

(http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l278/felixrex/0629091304-1.jpg)

Probably how it is when you get all the Gentile women around Mormon men.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AbeFroman on May 30, 2013, 09:49:14 AM
My boss has autographed Oscar de la Hoya gloves in his office.

Also there is this random empty 1 gallon Seagrams 7 bottle that has been in the corner of my office since before I worked here.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on May 30, 2013, 10:01:52 AM
there are a set of keys (between 7-10 keys on ring) that have been sitting at the front desk for at least 2 years.  nobody knows who they belong to.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 30, 2013, 10:02:17 AM
We have 2 bottles of Smirnoff Ice in our kitchen cabinet from the Christmas party 2 years ago.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 10:15:28 AM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 10:15:53 AM
This motorcycle has been parked here for six years.  Doesn't run.


(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0201_zps8dc952f9.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 10:18:34 AM
holy crap your guys' offices  :lol:  :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: GoodForAnother on May 30, 2013, 10:19:51 AM
GoodForAnother
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on May 30, 2013, 10:20:28 AM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AbeFroman on May 30, 2013, 10:23:48 AM
This motorcycle has been parked here for six years.  Doesn't run.


(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0201_zps8dc952f9.jpg)

Winner
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bookie Pimp on May 30, 2013, 10:24:03 AM
Politically correct sexual harassment poster

(http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l278/felixrex/0629091304-1.jpg)

I'm glad they didn't have these at one of my old jobs...  May have scared the creepy old broad outta earning me a nice settlement.

 :kstategrad:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ChiCat on May 30, 2013, 10:24:58 AM
I have a weird cat/monkey African statue or something in my office.  Was disturbing others at work so they thought it would be funny to put it in my office.  I have it on a table behind my desk that I never see and it just stares down anyone that enters my office.  Doesn't bother me at all
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 10:31:23 AM
gonna be honest here, steve dave, when you started this thread i was a little bit concerned it wouldnt have anything funny but HOLY crap THERES A MOTORCYCLE IN SOMEONES OFFICE
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 10:42:04 AM
gonna be honest here, steve dave, when you started this thread i was a little bit concerned it wouldnt have anything funny but HOLY crap THERES A MOTORCYCLE IN SOMEONES OFFICE

empty bottles! ayoooga!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 11:14:07 AM
gonna be honest here, steve dave, when you started this thread i was a little bit concerned it wouldnt have anything funny but HOLY crap THERES A MOTORCYCLE IN SOMEONES OFFICE

I work at a pretty cool place.  Current shot of my office.  Who needs a chair when you can have a couch.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/sofa_zpsd055d925.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 11:16:15 AM
monitor  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 11:16:27 AM
gonna be honest here, steve dave, when you started this thread i was a little bit concerned it wouldnt have anything funny but HOLY crap THERES A MOTORCYCLE IN SOMEONES OFFICE

I work at a pretty cool place.  Current shot of my office.  Who needs a chair when you can have a couch.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/sofa_zpsd055d925.jpg)

:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 30, 2013, 11:17:56 AM
omg
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 11:18:30 AM
gonna be honest here, steve dave, when you started this thread i was a little bit concerned it wouldnt have anything funny but HOLY crap THERES A MOTORCYCLE IN SOMEONES OFFICE

I work at a pretty cool place.  Current shot of my office.  Who needs a chair when you can have a couch.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/sofa_zpsd055d925.jpg)

:lol:

that's probably the only time I've been able to look as someone's workspace and have no rough ridin' clue what their job might be.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 30, 2013, 11:21:35 AM
that's probably the only time I've been able to look as someone's workspace and have no rough ridin' clue what their job might be.

this would make a good thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 11:24:14 AM
that's probably the only time I've been able to look as someone's workspace and have no rough ridin' clue what their job might be.

this would make a good thread

 :thumbs: :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on May 30, 2013, 11:36:45 AM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on May 30, 2013, 11:38:01 AM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?

He's got the frame for it, at least.


(he's pretty tall)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on May 30, 2013, 11:51:03 AM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?

He's got the frame for it, at least.


(he's pretty tall)

lopakman, meet the back of Metalhead's hand
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 30, 2013, 11:54:15 AM
The quasi sofa table makes it work. Nicely done.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: cfbandyman on May 30, 2013, 12:06:17 PM
Tin of Christmas popcorn that refills itself weekly, a sign over the coffee pot that was Terry Tate, office linebacker pointing at you screaming "YOU KILL THE JOE, YOU MAKE SOME MO'!" One of the guys in the office that's in the work fantasy league and won it last year has the legitly 2.5' tall trophy front and center on his desk, (it's also a traveling trophy in it's 8th year). Also we like peanuts in my part of the the office and the boss always keeps it stocked with peanut, and then he also treats that part of the office floor like it's Texas Roadhouse or something cause by the end of the day it's littered with peanut shells.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 01:09:21 PM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?

Not too bad.  I'm pretty happy with some of the gains I made over winter.  Actually considering entering an amateur competition for old guys!


(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/facebook_-389585764_zps726dc8d9.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 01:10:39 PM
HOLY crap GIRAFFE
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 01:11:59 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Winters on May 30, 2013, 01:12:00 PM
I think that little girl is drinking an RC cola?  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 01:18:27 PM
I think that little girl is drinking an RC cola?  :sdeek:

I think it was a Jolt or maybe apple juice.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Winters on May 30, 2013, 01:19:43 PM
I think that little girl is drinking an RC cola?  :sdeek:

I think it was a Jolt or maybe apple juice.
My mistake  :embarrassed:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 30, 2013, 01:21:47 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

I would just roll with the assumption that it is a medical condition, because I would probably not be able to work there anymore if I went with the masturbation theory.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 01:22:56 PM
I think that little girl is drinking an RC cola?  :sdeek:

I think it was a Jolt or maybe apple juice.
My mistake  :embarrassed:

 :cool:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 01:23:10 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

I would just roll with the assumption that it is a medical condition, because I would probably not be able to work there anymore if I went with the masturbation theory.

that's the advice I gave my coworker.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 01:23:49 PM
I can't think of a single place in the world less sexy than my office bathroom stalls.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 30, 2013, 01:24:19 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

I would just roll with the assumption that it is a medical condition, because I would probably not be able to work there anymore if I went with the masturbation theory.
Are there some really hot girls in the office that dress a little slutty?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 30, 2013, 01:25:28 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

Did the two events happen in the same day? If so then probably not masturbation. I mean, who can jack off twice in one day in the office bathroom stall?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 01:27:41 PM
haha, not me. that's for sure.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 30, 2013, 01:28:26 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

Did the two events happen in the same day? If so then probably not masturbation. I mean, who can jack off twice in one day in the office bathroom stall?

I'm sure there are some porn addicts out there that could. It's entirely possible that the paper sound was actually the guy turning pages on a porno mag.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 01:29:25 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

Did the two events happen in the same day? If so then probably not masturbation. I mean, who can jack off twice in one day in the office bathroom stall?

Who can do it once? It was multiple days. Coworker, then me, then coworker again came to me right after it happened saying, "IT HAPPENED AGAIN JUST NOW!!!"

I'll admit the suspect is a little creepy, but I think it's a medical thing.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 30, 2013, 01:30:16 PM
I think my boss is pretty hilarious. I also think all the IT dorks are pretty hilarious too.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Frankenklein on May 30, 2013, 01:36:09 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.
  Do you work where that twitter dude boner dad works,sounds like his office bathroom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 30, 2013, 01:39:43 PM
I bet he has an STD. :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: StevieWonderSniperSchool on May 30, 2013, 01:48:06 PM
I bet he has an STD. :frown:
spoken from experience
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 30, 2013, 01:49:03 PM
Yeah, the guy is probably treating his STD before he starts masturbating. That explains the paper sound in a way that the guy wouldn't have to sneak a porno mag to work.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on May 30, 2013, 02:50:27 PM
great reason not to schedule your regular visits to the crapper for public restrooms

there's a lot of great things about home field advantage, this is just one of the better ones
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 30, 2013, 03:04:17 PM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF

Ppl w strong enough feelings towards meaningless things are the best.  I mean, some took the time to make a sign because they had to hold in a crap for 1 extra min one day.
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 30, 2013, 03:06:10 PM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF

Ppl w strong enough feelings towards meaningless things are the best.  I mean, some took the time to make a sign because they had to hold in a crap for 1 extra min one day.

You aren't reading the sign properly. The sign is saying that you have to sit down to pee in the toilet. It's not saying you can only use the toilet to poop. It's actually a pretty awesome sign. I would like one to anonymously put in my office bathroom, not because I really care, but because it's hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 03:07:21 PM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF

Ppl w strong enough feelings towards meaningless things are the best.  I mean, some took the time to make a sign because they had to hold in a crap for 1 extra min one day.

I'm guessing it's more about piss all over the toilet. I think it's a worthy cause.

tangent: I hate it when I go to the bathroom and there's piss all over, but I know someone's waiting. I'm not going to clean it up, but if I was the person waiting, I would just assume it was the guy that just left the bathroom that pissed all over the place.
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 30, 2013, 03:09:03 PM
Not really hilarious like a trophy or a couch, but it's kind of gross. A fellow coworker came up to me and told me he was in the bathroom and some dude went into the stall and stood next to him and jacked off. Like, to completion while my coworker was taking a crap in the next stall. I had some suspicions about who it was and then I was taking a crap and something kind of similar happened to me. It was the guy I suspected but I'm not sure he was jacking off. I'm guessing he has a medical condition, like a colonostomy bag or an open wound that he has to tend to? I heard paper tearing and maybe lotion being applied. I still got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. And yes it was the guy I suspected it was but I am not real sure how to proceed.

Did the two events happen in the same day? If so then probably not masturbation. I mean, who can jack off twice in one day in the office bathroom stall?

Who can do it once? It was multiple days. Coworker, then me, then coworker again came to me right after it happened saying, "IT HAPPENED AGAIN JUST NOW!!!"

I'll admit the suspect is a little creepy, but I think it's a medical thing.

I know the special needs teacher at the local HS.  He tells me that many of the HS special needs kids have, as a component to their Individual Learning Plan thingy, that they have to be allowed time to whack it in the bathroom.  Like more than once, daily.

What I am saying is that maybe he is high functioning austistic or something?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 03:09:42 PM
I'm sure it was a passive aggressive joke. It's hilarious, but it does really suck to roll up to a toilet drenched in piss.
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 30, 2013, 03:10:01 PM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF

Ppl w strong enough feelings towards meaningless things are the best.  I mean, some took the time to make a sign because they had to hold in a crap for 1 extra min one day.

I would like one to anonymously put in my office bathroom, not because I really care, but because it's hilarious.

I already printed it out and put it up in the bathroom.  Will it get taken down?   :dunno:  Probably not at my office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on May 30, 2013, 03:11:11 PM
Someone put this up on the inside of the toilet stalls in the men's latrine:



(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/409087B3-4ECD-40F4-90DD-925140E36F23-3026-00000351C8A6733F_zps8ed1de1a.jpg)

WTF

Ppl w strong enough feelings towards meaningless things are the best.  I mean, some took the time to make a sign because they had to hold in a crap for 1 extra min one day.

I'm guessing it's more about piss all over the toilet. I think it's a worthy cause.

tangent: I hate it when I go to the bathroom and there's piss all over, but I know someone's waiting. I'm not going to clean it up, but if I was the person waiting, I would just assume it was the guy that just left the bathroom that pissed all over the place.

That plus errant pubes.  Nothing worse than someone else thinking you just shed your bush all over the office restroom when you didn't. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 30, 2013, 03:11:36 PM
most of you shut up
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 03:12:46 PM
most of you shut up

yeah, everyone not talking about the piss sign and piss and other pube things I think sd means here.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on May 30, 2013, 03:14:19 PM
I just assumed all men peed in the urinals.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on May 30, 2013, 03:16:14 PM
A couple months ago after a long meeting the guy next to me stood up to leave and took one step and hit the floor really really hard right on his shoulder.  Turns out his foot had fallen asleep during the meeting.  Was hilarious.  Hurt his shoulder pretty bad though.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 30, 2013, 03:19:37 PM
A couple months ago after a long meeting the guy next to me stood up to leave and took one step and hit the floor really really hard right on his shoulder.  Turns out his foot had fallen asleep during the meeting.  Was hilarious.  Hurt his shoulder pretty bad though.

that's great

Also that lady has had two potty congratulation calls TODAY.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 30, 2013, 03:22:48 PM
lol, I missed the toddler yoga before. that's SO 'Francisco!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on May 30, 2013, 06:24:44 PM
Has no one noticed that the stick figure is shockingly anatomically correct
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 30, 2013, 06:56:50 PM
Has no one noticed that the stick figure is shockingly anatomically correct

yes.

also noticed that he's peeing red and green and should see a doctor immediately.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on May 30, 2013, 09:50:26 PM
red means stop, green means go.  subliminal message.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 30, 2013, 11:23:52 PM
red means stop, green means go.  subliminal message.

 :horrorsurprise:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on May 30, 2013, 11:56:15 PM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?

He's got the frame for it, at least.


(he's pretty tall)

lopakman, meet the back of Metalhead's hand

I didn't mean that to be mean. Was it mean? I only met him briefly at the spring game.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: fairweatherpud on May 31, 2013, 01:08:12 AM
I just assumed all men peed in the urinals.

I've worked with guys short enough to be hysterical if they used the urinals.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 31, 2013, 08:22:56 AM
Hows the body building going, lopakman?

He's got the frame for it, at least.


(he's pretty tall)

lopakman, meet the back of Metalhead's hand

I didn't mean that to be mean. Was it mean? I only met him briefly at the spring game.

No it wasn't.  I don't think Bread knew that we've met before. 

 :cheers:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 31, 2013, 08:24:15 AM
I have a thing in my office that is hilarious to me and also disgusting and possibly shameful. Stay tuned!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 31, 2013, 08:36:53 AM
Ok so one up my coworkers put up these easter window sticker gummies things about two years ago. In that time it was vandalized with permament marker facial features then served as flypaper catching and killing all the fruit flies that infested my potted bamboo plant. Now the whole thing is decomposing and sagging/melting/dripping down my window.

(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/35B67A69-E67B-4FD1-B79C-CD209A14EB2C-3717-0000046BEA60F4ED_zps56fce2af.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on May 31, 2013, 08:52:02 AM
Ok so one up my coworkers put up these easter window sticker gummies things about two years ago. In that time it was vandalized with permament marker facial features then served as flypaper catching and killing all the fruit flies that infested my potted bamboo plant. Now the whole thing is decomposing and sagging/melting/dripping down my window.

(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/35B67A69-E67B-4FD1-B79C-CD209A14EB2C-3717-0000046BEA60F4ED_zps56fce2af.jpg)


:surprised:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 31, 2013, 08:52:49 AM
grizzzooooossssss take that off
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on May 31, 2013, 10:30:32 AM
No denied, it was mean.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on May 31, 2013, 10:31:27 AM
Also, rough ridin' gross puniraptor.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 31, 2013, 10:32:20 AM
guess puniraptors business: sells scentsy candles from home
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 31, 2013, 10:34:08 AM
if by home you mean mom's basement  :eye:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: asava on May 31, 2013, 10:46:13 AM
guess puniraptors business: sells scentsy candles from home

i thought this was going to be in a different thread?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on May 31, 2013, 11:06:22 AM
HOLY crap GIRAFFE

how could you overlook the Emu?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ben ji on May 31, 2013, 11:06:32 AM
About 10 different peoples phones just went off with flash flood warnings....EVERYONE stands up and walks outside like they are going to see a river flooding or something
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on May 31, 2013, 11:17:33 AM
our shop bathroom sign is better than yours 

(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/KtYGvIdQZrjFGLDdsXOTqqTFuPlkwSs5qM1EeVTxINCs=w510-h904-no)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: TheCatFanSpeaks on May 31, 2013, 11:19:19 AM
About 10 different peoples phones just went off with flash flood warnings....EVERYONE stands up and walks outside like they are going to see a river flooding or something

 :lol: I think we work in the same office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 31, 2013, 11:23:36 AM
About 10 different peoples phones just went off with flash flood warnings....EVERYONE stands up and walks outside like they are going to see a river flooding or something

My phone just did that.   :dubious:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 31, 2013, 11:24:06 AM
About 10 different peoples phones just went off with flash flood warnings....EVERYONE stands up and walks outside like they are going to see a river flooding or something

 :lol: I think we work in the same office.

mods can we get an IP addy crosscheck here plz?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 31, 2013, 11:25:14 AM
About 10 different peoples phones just went off with flash flood warnings....EVERYONE stands up and walks outside like they are going to see a river flooding or something

 :lol: I think we work in the same office.


Yeah, that is legitimately hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: one time gella on May 31, 2013, 02:21:04 PM
At a previous job where I was OP manager which included HR duty, I had a gal who returned from maternity leave and would wear appropriate business dress attire but she was constantly nipped out.  One of her nosey PITA co-workers (always in everyone else's business) came to me and asked if I could tell Nips that she is offending other people in the office.  I told her "NO!". She then asked if she could take up a collection to buy Nips a padded bra and anonymously leave it on her desk for a hint.  I've never had a better day than when I got to fire PITA.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 31, 2013, 04:54:32 PM
our shop bathroom sign is better than yours 

(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/KtYGvIdQZrjFGLDdsXOTqqTFuPlkwSs5qM1EeVTxINCs=w510-h904-no)

i used to mow the lawn at ****** from like 5th grade till i graduated high school.  i always made time to go to the bathroom because there was a stack of playboys a foot tall in one of the drawers in there.  :fatty:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on May 31, 2013, 09:55:55 PM
our shop bathroom sign is better than yours 

(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/KtYGvIdQZrjFGLDdsXOTqqTFuPlkwSs5qM1EeVTxINCs=w510-h904-no)

i used to mow the lawn at ****** from like 5th grade till i graduated high school.  i always made time to go to the bathroom because there was a stack of playboys a foot tall in one of the drawers in there.  :fatty:


LOL.     Allegedly the guy that used to mow our lawn and keep up the shop has banged women in every possible spot.    Women have supposedly stopped while he was out mowing the lawn and he'd find a job trailer or empty storage unit to bang.   
Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on May 31, 2013, 09:58:48 PM
Mikey, shut up
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on May 31, 2013, 10:19:06 PM
Mikey, shut up

make me tough guy....just make me.   :shakesfist:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on June 01, 2013, 06:27:03 AM
Mikey, shut up

make me tough guy....just make me.   :shakesfist:
Lawn mower guy banging chicks all over the place is a very hilarious office thing. MORE! :excited:
Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on June 01, 2013, 08:46:03 AM
I walked in on the old man who was the founder and prez of a steel company we shared the floor with, attempting to crap in the urinal. When I walked in he said... "Oh, I can't do this here." and went into one of the stalls (pants still down).

He was really rough ridin' senile so it was more sad than funny at the time.  But now, I think it's funny as crap so I posted it in this thread. 
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on June 01, 2013, 08:53:02 AM
I walked in on the old man who was the founder and prez of a steel company we shared the floor with, attempting to crap in the urinal. When I walked in he said... "Oh, I can't do this here." and went into one of the stalls (pants still down).

He was really rough ridin' senile so it was more sad than funny at the time.  But now, I think it's funny as crap so I posted it in this thread.

That steel company is mumped

Sent from my KFTT using Tapatalk 2

Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on June 01, 2013, 09:03:04 AM
I walked in on the old man who was the founder and prez of a steel company we shared the floor with, attempting to crap in the urinal. When I walked in he said... "Oh, I can't do this here." and went into one of the stalls (pants still down).

He was really rough ridin' senile so it was more sad than funny at the time.  But now, I think it's funny as crap so I posted it in this thread.

That steel company is mumped

Sent from my KFTT using Tapatalk 2
SELL SELL SELL!!!
Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on June 01, 2013, 12:00:24 PM
This was 10 years ago FWIW
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Shacks on June 01, 2013, 12:56:06 PM
Sounds like he was just pretending to be senile so he could eff with the janitors
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 03, 2013, 09:08:16 AM
Ok so one up my coworkers put up these easter window sticker gummies things about two years ago. In that time it was vandalized with permament marker facial features then served as flypaper catching and killing all the fruit flies that infested my potted bamboo plant. Now the whole thing is decomposing and sagging/melting/dripping down my window.

(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/35B67A69-E67B-4FD1-B79C-CD209A14EB2C-3717-0000046BEA60F4ED_zps56fce2af.jpg)

OK, THIS THING IS COMING DOWN TODAY:

(http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i421/PUNITRATOR/photo_zps062f5914.jpg)

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on July 03, 2013, 09:15:42 AM
ACID
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on July 03, 2013, 09:16:01 AM
:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on August 09, 2013, 10:36:11 AM
Slow day at the office so we decided to make a miniature golf course.  Ran out of room so we're counting Wii golf as well.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0215_zpsd1cd8c8a.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0216_zps61df915a.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0214_zpsc80bbd7e.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0210_zpsf580f45f.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0213_zps4329a51e.jpg)


Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on August 09, 2013, 10:38:14 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EllRobersonisInnocent on August 09, 2013, 10:38:41 AM
I'd rather go home if this was going on at my office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 09, 2013, 10:39:08 AM
at least it gets you up off your couch desk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on August 09, 2013, 10:39:30 AM
lopakman def seems to have the most "interesting" workplace so far, keep 'em coming
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dlew12 on August 09, 2013, 11:04:05 AM
my workplace doesn't have wifi and there are more workers than internet jacks so we have to share

 :blank:
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on August 09, 2013, 11:12:40 AM
my workplace doesn't have wifi and there are more workers than internet jacks so we have to share

 :blank:

I can mail you an extra router if you'd like personal wifi
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dlew12 on August 09, 2013, 11:17:41 AM
my workplace doesn't have wifi and there are more workers than internet jacks so we have to share

 :blank:

I can mail you an extra router if you'd like personal wifi
that would be hilarious and awesome but today's my last day
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AbeFroman on August 09, 2013, 11:19:42 AM
my workplace doesn't have wifi and there are more workers than internet jacks so we have to share

 :blank:

I can mail you an extra router if you'd like personal wifi
that would be hilarious and awesome but today's my last day

Reasons to find a new job thread? No Wifi is a pretty good one.
Title: Re: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on August 09, 2013, 11:28:43 AM
Reasons to find a new job thread? No Wifi is a pretty good one.

having to timeshare ethernet jacks to do your job would be another good one
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on August 09, 2013, 11:46:03 AM
(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0213_zps4329a51e.jpg)

The thing on the wall:  we did that during one of my old projects.  :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on August 09, 2013, 12:23:44 PM
Slow day at the office so we decided to make a miniature golf course.  Ran out of room so we're counting Wii golf as well.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0215_zpsd1cd8c8a.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0216_zps61df915a.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0214_zpsc80bbd7e.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0210_zpsf580f45f.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0213_zps4329a51e.jpg)

(http://bpmforreal.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/office-space-e1323704377981.png)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on August 09, 2013, 01:00:58 PM
(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMAG0213_zps4329a51e.jpg)

The thing on the wall:  we did that during one of my old projects.  :D

Pic?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on August 09, 2013, 01:12:00 PM
(http://bpmforreal.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/office-space-e1323704377981.png)

 :thumbs:

I make sure we don't get sued.  Although I am not one, I spend a lot of time talking to lawyers.


(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/officespace_zps0654858a.jpg)



Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: hemmy on August 09, 2013, 02:05:53 PM
A couple months ago after a long meeting the guy next to me stood up to leave and took one step and hit the floor really really hard right on his shoulder.  Turns out his foot had fallen asleep during the meeting.  Was hilarious.  Hurt his shoulder pretty bad though.

Not office related but this happened to me 2 days ago when I woke up. Face full of carpet, and jammed my toes which I couldn't feel.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EuroCat on August 09, 2013, 07:06:26 PM
We don't dick around at my office. Just make  :kstategrad:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on August 09, 2013, 07:23:07 PM
(http://bpmforreal.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/office-space-e1323704377981.png)

 :thumbs:

I make sure we don't get sued.  Although I am not one, I spend a lot of time talking to lawyers.


(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/officespace_zps0654858a.jpg)

You should hire me as outside.  I'd make you look extremely good.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on September 23, 2013, 01:00:07 PM
Stay tuned.... :fatty:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on September 23, 2013, 01:07:38 PM
Stay tuned.... :fatty:

 :popcorn:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 10, 2014, 08:35:31 AM
I'm a little late on this but here you go.  So one Friday back in September a few of us went to BWW for some delicious bone in wings.  There was a guy there doing the blazin challenge.  We then decided that we should have our own Buffalo Wild Wings Blazin challenge at work, but with unlimited wings.  Contest was how many bone in wings you could eat in 20 minutes.  The winner ate 31.  It's also important to note that while people decided to dress up in costumes, it was not Halloween.  Sometimes people here just like to dress up in weird things.


We bought 30 dozen wings and ran out. 

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_7042_zpsb99c1ad4.jpg)


We made a trophy.

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_7065_zpsdf4caac1.jpg)


Winner who was later fired for sexual harrassment for a comment he made during the November's Soup-off.
(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_7038_zpse0193874.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_6978_zps992235b6.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_6965_zps5763e246.jpg)

(http://i1351.photobucket.com/albums/p786/lopakman/IMG_7023_zps9c225d23.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on January 10, 2014, 08:36:42 AM
looks like a pretty fun place to work
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 10, 2014, 08:48:53 AM
what was the soup off comment?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 10, 2014, 08:51:55 AM
what was the soup off comment?

To a female co worker.  "You know where I'd like to put this ladle don't you?"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on January 10, 2014, 08:52:40 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 10, 2014, 08:52:56 AM
lopak's office is just incredible :love:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 10, 2014, 08:54:19 AM
terribly comment aside, i bet losing suicide king was a blow to office morale
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: TownieCat on January 10, 2014, 08:54:29 AM
what was the soup off comment?

To a female co worker.  "You know where I'd like to put this ladle don't you?"

 :sdeek:

Serious question... Are you allowed to drink at your workplace?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Cartierfor3 on January 10, 2014, 08:54:39 AM
5th pic down. cow guy.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 10, 2014, 09:05:50 AM
what was the soup off comment?

To a female co worker.  "You know where I'd like to put this ladle don't you?"

 :sdeek:

Serious question... Are you allowed to drink at your workplace?

No.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 10, 2014, 09:08:21 AM
terribly comment aside, i bet losing suicide king was a blow to office morale

Most of the females were pretty happy to see him go.  Was a creeper.  KU grad of course.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on January 10, 2014, 09:08:38 AM
God my office is boring.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SabiNation on January 10, 2014, 09:26:51 AM
God my office is boring.

Me too, Emo  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 10, 2014, 09:30:17 AM
i have a person that helps me do stuff. she has a cellphone that has a dog barking as her ring tone and two dogs at home that she likes to talk to people about. the ringtone is pretty loud some days you guys, to the point where other people (not just her and i) can hear it. i want to tell her what in the world, change that stupid thing. but i really just don't have the heart to. she's in her 40's and idk. i just let it go.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on January 10, 2014, 09:30:58 AM
God my office is boring.

Me too, Emo  :frown:

I like to think your office isn't boring but that everyone just does crazy crap on their holidays. Like holy crap its MLK Jr day lets get bombed at Applebees starting at 9 AM. Or like holy crap its Columbus day time to hit the strip clup!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on January 10, 2014, 09:31:50 AM
i have a person that helps me do stuff. she has a cellphone that has a dog barking as her ring tone and two dogs at home that she likes to talk to people about. the ringtone is pretty loud some days you guys, to the point where other people (not just her and i) can hear it. i want to tell her what in the world, change that stupid thing. but i really just don't have the heart to. she's in her 40's and idk. i just let it go.

seems kind of unprofessional for a 911 dispatcher to have a dog as her ring tone...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SabiNation on January 10, 2014, 09:34:18 AM
God my office is boring.

Me too, Emo  :frown:

I like to think your office isn't boring but that everyone just does crazy crap on their holidays. Like holy crap its MLK Jr day lets get bombed at Applebees starting at 9 AM. Or like holy crap its Columbus day time to hit the strip clup!

#obsessed
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on January 10, 2014, 09:36:22 AM
i have a person that helps me do stuff. she has a cellphone that has a dog barking as her ring tone and two dogs at home that she likes to talk to people about. the ringtone is pretty loud some days you guys, to the point where other people (not just her and i) can hear it. i want to tell her what in the world, change that stupid thing. but i really just don't have the heart to. she's in her 40's and idk. i just let it go.

our accountant has her volume up 100% 24/7 and it is some awful jason mraz song and she just lets it ring all the way through. going on 3 years now that she's had that ringtone and her stupid kids call her all the time and when she doesn't want to answer, she just lets it ring. full volume. entire office just looks around and shakes their respective heads. the worst
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on January 10, 2014, 09:36:37 AM
who paid for all those wings?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 10, 2014, 09:37:17 AM
who paid for all those wings?

have you seen lopak's backsplash? :love:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 10, 2014, 09:56:21 AM
who paid for all those wings?

Company did.  To justify it we made it into a charity event.  The eaters all got sponsers to donate a certain amount per wing eaten, or a lump sum and then we donated the money to Children's Mercy.  We raised around $1200.00 for the kids. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on January 10, 2014, 09:59:45 AM
who paid for all those wings?

Company did.  To justify it we made it into a charity event.  The eaters all got sponsers to donate a certain amount per wing eaten, or a lump sum and then we donated the money to Children's Mercy.  We raised around $1200.00 for the kids.

 :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 10, 2014, 10:05:47 AM
seriously though.... "ROOF, ROOF, ROOF!......ROOF, ROOF, ROOF!...."


i just shake my darn head, you guys.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 10:09:43 AM
We had a technology sub-contractor on a long-term project who was really strange.  He had an old flip phone, and his ring-tone was some freaking love song, but in that weird 8-bit flip phone unsophisticated type music.

He seemingly refused to ever use vibrate, even after we would drop like a million hints and comments about using vibrate.

The worst part of this is that dumbass had it set to play his full ring tone on text messages, not just calls.  So every rough ridin' text this bad person received play this long elaborate love song, in that old timey 8-bit flip phone style. 



The other really strange thing he would do was carry around pictures of his 60's something camaro.  He'd bust them out at Mexican restaurants on work lunches and show them to waiters, but never waitresses, and never to gringo's.  Only Mexican men.  If he found himself without his pictures, he'd strike up a conversation about cars with the waiter, and always in Spanish.  Again, never to white waiters.  It was his go-to pick-up move, and it must have worked a fair bit, because he did it all the time. 



His contract wasn't renewed by the client, and he claimed it was because they were racist against latinos (he was like vaguely latino...like maybe one grand parent was latino or something.)  The sad, but also kinda funny part was that while the client was not racist at all, they were really bigoted and didn't like gay people.  I was like "You are getting warmer" when he'd talk about them being racist....didn't have the heart/courage to tell him "bro, it's because you are gay."   :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 10:11:27 AM
Oh, and while we are talking about strange phone behavior at the work place, we had this old guy who had obviously just got a new Droid phone, because every single text message he received played that robot voice "DDDDDDDRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDD" word every single rough ridin' time he received a text message (10-20 times a day). 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 10, 2014, 10:12:52 AM
you told that camaro guy story really well, pete.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 10, 2014, 10:13:53 AM
you told that camaro guy story really well, pete.

i was there.  i remember ordering the lengua tacos
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 10:14:12 AM
you told that camaro guy story really well, pete.

He was SOOOO weird, rick. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on January 10, 2014, 10:17:05 AM
pete, that was a great story. especially the end where you were hinting about getting warmer.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 10:17:57 AM
One of the other really horrible things about Camaro guy was that he would do the over-the-top spanish accent on words that weren't really spanish.

Like lemonade.  He would order leeeeeeeemonda.  Like the waiter would have no idea what he wanted if he just rough ridin' said "Lemonade, please."

And, he would repeat words back to you, I guess to correct your pronunciation on them.  But again, on words that you really didn't need to pronounce in spanish.  There was this one restaurant that was called Lola's, and he would repeat that back after you said it, as if he were correcting your accent....I mean, there is really one way to pronounce that rough ridin' word.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 10:20:48 AM
Me:  "Let's go to Lola's"

Camaro guy:  "Lola's"

Me: "That's literally exactly like what I just rough ridin' said, dude."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on January 10, 2014, 10:24:51 AM
pete you should have sung the eric Clapton song back at him when hed correct you.

la-la-la-la-la looooollaaaaaaa
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 10, 2014, 10:25:26 AM
sounds like pete has a grievance IMO
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on January 10, 2014, 10:29:45 AM
Oh, and while we are talking about strange phone behavior at the work place, we had this old guy who had obviously just got a new Droid phone, because every single text message he received played that robot voice "DDDDDDDRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDD" word every single rough ridin' time he received a text message (10-20 times a day).

sdmom has really bad hearing. her phone is on this because it is the only ringtone she can hear. pretty hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on January 10, 2014, 11:28:52 AM
Semi-interesting coworker phone story:

Went to a conference with a group from work and we were in a session listening to a speaker with about 2 hundred or so other people, and one of my coworkers is texting and every time he gets a text it makes a sound like peeling out tires.  And its really loud and everyone is staring.  So I say "hey why don't you put that on silent" and he says "I don't think you can for texts" and I said "ya you can" and then I put it on silent for him. The end.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 10, 2014, 12:17:11 PM
Semi-interesting coworker phone story:

Went to a conference with a group from work and we were in a session listening to a speaker with about 2 hundred or so other people, and one of my coworkers is texting and every time he gets a text it makes a sound like peeling out tires.  And its really loud and everyone is staring.  So I say "hey why don't you put that on silent" and he says "I don't think you can for texts" and I said "ya you can" and then I put it on silent for him. The end.

 :lol:


Ya, Camaro guy got really pissed when I took his flip phone when he was in a meeting and set it to vibrate only.  He didn't know it was me, but was mad someone "hacked into his phone." 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on January 10, 2014, 12:28:32 PM
We had a technology sub-contractor on a long-term project who was really strange.  He had an old flip phone, and his ring-tone was some freaking love song, but in that weird 8-bit flip phone unsophisticated type music.

He seemingly refused to ever use vibrate, even after we would drop like a million hints and comments about using vibrate.

The worst part of this is that dumbass had it set to play his full ring tone on text messages, not just calls.  So every rough ridin' text this bad person received play this long elaborate love song, in that old timey 8-bit flip phone style. 



The other really strange thing he would do was carry around pictures of his 60's something camaro.  He'd bust them out at Mexican restaurants on work lunches and show them to waiters, but never waitresses, and never to gringo's.  Only Mexican men.  If he found himself without his pictures, he'd strike up a conversation about cars with the waiter, and always in Spanish.  Again, never to white waiters.  It was his go-to pick-up move, and it must have worked a fair bit, because he did it all the time. 



His contract wasn't renewed by the client, and he claimed it was because they were racist against latinos (he was like vaguely latino...like maybe one grand parent was latino or something.)  The sad, but also kinda funny part was that while the client was not racist at all, they were really bigoted and didn't like gay people.  I was like "You are getting warmer" when he'd talk about them being racist....didn't have the heart/courage to tell him "bro, it's because you are gay."   :frown:
Johnny Wichita? :peek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 15, 2014, 02:47:36 PM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training call right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! WHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on January 15, 2014, 02:52:26 PM
there's some guy that works from home in AZ and he always forgets to mute his phone when we are on calls and then his (est. 50 from the sounds of them) dogs lose their mind for the mailman or something and everyone lols and then he says sorry and is embarrased but it's ok because it's funny to everyone and we all make that cash.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 15, 2014, 02:57:02 PM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! wHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:

Pretty dumb to hang up imo. If I was the trainer, I'd take a roll call to find out who it was. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 15, 2014, 02:57:57 PM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! wHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:

Pretty dumb to hang up imo. If I was the trainer, I'd take a roll call to find out who it was.
She already took it. This was like 5 minutes after roll call.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 15, 2014, 02:58:21 PM
there's some guy that works from home in AZ and he always forgets to mute his phone when we are on calls and then his (est. 50 from the sounds of them) dogs lose their mind for the mailman or something and everyone lols and then he says sorry and is embarrased but it's ok because it's funny to everyone and we all make that cash.
That's adorable.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 15, 2014, 03:10:19 PM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! wHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:

Pretty dumb to hang up imo. If I was the trainer, I'd take a roll call to find out who it was.
She already took it. This was like 5 minutes after roll call.

Yeah, that's why I'd take another roll call to find out who it was.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on January 15, 2014, 03:10:29 PM
there's some guy that works from home in AZ and he always forgets to mute his phone when we are on calls and then his (est. 50 from the sounds of them) dogs lose their mind for the mailman or something and everyone lols and then he says sorry and is embarrased but it's ok because it's funny to everyone and we all make that cash.
That's adorable.

yes it is. he's also very old and nice.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on January 15, 2014, 03:11:21 PM
or the trainer could like not waste everyones time trying to be a hardass and just move on...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on January 15, 2014, 03:14:10 PM
I've done that before lol - it's def a YES! moment
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 15, 2014, 03:14:53 PM
or the trainer could like not waste everyones time trying to be a hardass and just move on...

It wouldn't be very hilarious if you couldn't laugh in the face of the person who said it now would it?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on January 15, 2014, 03:28:52 PM
One time we had a fat bald sales guy on a video conference call with customers.  So like of course the sales guys set up these meetings with engineers and then they just STFU because they don't know jack.  So sales guy schedules the call, clients and engineers get on, sales guy makes introductions, and then is just in the background.  He's working from home and he ends up standing up, camera still on of course, and reveals to everyone that he's in a wife beater and whitey tighteys.  Everyone was  :sdeek: but they all pretended not to notice.  I heard this story at the water cooler so it made it pretty far.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on January 15, 2014, 04:02:38 PM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! wHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:

Pretty dumb to hang up imo. If I was the trainer, I'd take a roll call to find out who it was.
She already took it. This was like 5 minutes after roll call.

Yeah, that's why I'd take another roll call to find out who it was.

I have no idea what you guys are talking about here.  Beyond me.  Also, lopakman what is it that you do at your super amazing fun time office?  Like what is the business?  Looks incredible. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on January 15, 2014, 06:01:36 PM
I once sat near a middle aged woman who used to call her house and talk to her cats through her answering machine.  Like, "Hi, Buttons and Callie and Checkers. Mommy loves you. I'll be home soon."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 15, 2014, 06:04:36 PM
I once sat near a middle aged woman who used to call her house and talk to her cats through her answering machine.  Like, "Hi, Buttons and Callie and Checkers. Mommy loves you. I'll be home soon."
:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Stevesie60 on January 16, 2014, 01:40:36 AM
One time we had a fat bald sales guy on a video conference call with customers.  So like of course the sales guys set up these meetings with engineers and then they just STFU because they don't know jack.  So sales guy schedules the call, clients and engineers get on, sales guy makes introductions, and then is just in the background.  He's working from home and he ends up standing up, camera still on of course, and reveals to everyone that he's in a wife beater and whitey tighteys.  Everyone was  :sdeek: but they all pretended not to notice.  I heard this story at the water cooler so it made it pretty far.

So how was it not obvious that he was wearing a wife beater to start? Did he set it up so that you could only see his neck up?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on January 16, 2014, 01:52:49 AM
there's some guy that works from home in AZ and he always forgets to mute his phone when we are on calls and then his (est. 50 from the sounds of them) dogs lose their mind for the mailman or something and everyone lols and then he says sorry and is embarrased but it's ok because it's funny to everyone and we all make that cash.

tell your company to hire me remote from wherever i want to be.  i may not want to call in all the time though.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 16, 2014, 07:58:07 AM
I'm on a a training call right now. Everyone was told to mute their lines for the moment. The trainer is doing her thing and the next thing you hear in the background is: "eff man, I'll call you later, I'm on this lame ass training right now. I know, shoot me." Trainer: "EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! wHO'S TALKING RIGHT NOW!!!" Other line: "Click!"  :lol:

Pretty dumb to hang up imo. If I was the trainer, I'd take a roll call to find out who it was.
She already took it. This was like 5 minutes after roll call.

Yeah, that's why I'd take another roll call to find out who it was.

I have no idea what you guys are talking about here.  Beyond me.  Also, lopakman what is it that you do at your super amazing fun time office?  Like what is the business?  Looks incredible.

I work for an insurance company.  Part of my compensation package as management is based on employee engagement scores, hence all the things we do to keep employees happy.  Lot's of training goes into our staff, thus retention is very important.  There's a time to be serious but also a time to have fun.  We seem to have found a good balance here.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 16, 2014, 08:02:58 AM
except for ladle guy
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on January 16, 2014, 09:43:35 AM
except for ladle guy

RIP ladle guy
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 16, 2014, 11:02:26 AM
except for ladle guy

that guy was all handle and no bowl
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on January 16, 2014, 11:07:06 AM
except for ladle guy

RIP ladle guy

I heard he's going through a divorce. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on January 16, 2014, 11:17:42 AM
We play a game at my work called good news bad news.  Where it is really all bad news, but we add in the good news as a way to make ourselves feel better.

Example:

Good news!  I got a very detailed compliment on how I look today and found a potentially interested partner.

Bad news!  It was actually just sexual harassment.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 0.42 on January 16, 2014, 11:44:10 AM
Bad news!  It was actually just sexual harassment.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on January 16, 2014, 12:51:38 PM
One time we had a fat bald sales guy on a video conference call with customers.  So like of course the sales guys set up these meetings with engineers and then they just STFU because they don't know jack.  So sales guy schedules the call, clients and engineers get on, sales guy makes introductions, and then is just in the background.  He's working from home and he ends up standing up, camera still on of course, and reveals to everyone that he's in a wife beater and whitey tighteys.  Everyone was  :sdeek: but they all pretended not to notice.  I heard this story at the water cooler so it made it pretty far.

So how was it not obvious that he was wearing a wife beater to start? Did he set it up so that you could only see his neck up?

I guess. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 16, 2014, 01:10:00 PM
Looks like our colperate from yesterday has joined today's call. His name is Mark from Phoenix, AZ. :popcorn:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on January 16, 2014, 01:11:33 PM
Looks like our colperate from yesterday has joined today's call. His name is Mark from Phoenix, AZ. :popcorn:

omg fanning :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on January 16, 2014, 01:12:25 PM
Looks like our colperate from yesterday has joined today's call. His name is Mark from Phoenix, AZ. :popcorn:

omg fanning :D


Yeah took me a minute but   :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on January 16, 2014, 01:13:03 PM
Looks like our colperate from yesterday has joined today's call. His name is Mark from Phoenix, AZ. :popcorn:

omg fanning :D

 :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 16, 2014, 01:13:42 PM
 :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on January 16, 2014, 01:14:13 PM
Looks like our colperate from yesterday has joined today's call. His name is Mark from Phoenix, AZ. :popcorn:

omg fanning :D

What word is he trying to say?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 16, 2014, 01:15:10 PM
I thought maybe corporate, but I think now that it's culprit.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on January 16, 2014, 01:15:45 PM
I thought maybe corporate, but I think now that it's culprit.
You got it! :ksu:
Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RONE on January 16, 2014, 04:38:10 PM
I got to play with three puppies last week. Not so much hilarious as awesome. Puppies rule.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on January 16, 2014, 04:51:02 PM
The winner of this thread will be the colperate who comes in and simply says, "Fanning is in my office."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on January 22, 2014, 03:40:40 PM
Well apparently the power at our Chicago office is about to be turned off because Donna can't issue the PO correctly.  rough ridin' Donna.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 22, 2014, 04:03:27 PM
you guys know at the beginning of goonies where mikey says nothing exciting ever happens around here anyway and then brandon is all not unless dad gets his next however many paychecks by next week and then they just are kind of there and chunk starts putting whipped cream directly into his mouth? that's kind of like my work.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on January 22, 2014, 04:06:15 PM
That post just reminded me that I just realized last weekend that Josh Brolin was the big brother I Goonies... made me feel really old. 

Carry on....
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on January 23, 2014, 02:29:53 AM
Purchasing Dept where I work has one of those dry erase calendar things hanging in a public area.  Everyone is supposed to put their vacation days on it.  Everyone uses their name followed by "off" on the days they are going to be out.  This includes the guy named Jack.


Tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 23, 2014, 07:43:44 AM
lol tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on January 23, 2014, 08:18:18 AM
Purchasing Dept where I work has one of those dry erase calendar things hanging in a public area.  Everyone is supposed to put their vacation days on it.  Everyone uses their name followed by "off" on the days they are going to be out.  This includes the guy named Jack.


Tom

Pic or I'm calling BS!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on January 23, 2014, 11:45:58 AM
i don't get it, tom?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on January 23, 2014, 12:41:53 PM
Interesting if true.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on January 23, 2014, 12:46:05 PM
That post just reminded me that I just realized last weekend that Josh Brolin was the big brother I Goonies... made me feel really old. 

Carry on....

How have I never realized this?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on January 23, 2014, 12:49:59 PM
That post just reminded me that I just realized last weekend that Josh Brolin was the big brother I Goonies... made me feel really old. 

Carry on....

How have I never realized this?

Too busy fittling with your oversized slick shoes.  SLICK SHOES!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on January 24, 2014, 08:18:01 PM
Pic or I'm calling BS!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on January 24, 2014, 08:19:09 PM
tom, that's fantastic  :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kim carnes on January 24, 2014, 08:20:05 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 29, 2014, 04:14:16 PM
So this is up inside one of our toilet stalls. I doubt it helps any.

(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/7apu5umu.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: bubbles4ksu on January 29, 2014, 05:04:34 PM
reminds me of the time we stopped at a gas station in texahoma on the way to the fiesta bowl. 8mp took one look at the bathroom and ran back out to the car. he spent 5 minutes trying to figure out how someone could do that before giving up and declaring that it wasn't possible for a single person to spray so much crap.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 31, 2014, 02:19:39 PM
 :party:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EllRobersonisInnocent on January 31, 2014, 02:20:43 PM
oh man!  :billdance:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: yoga-like_abana on January 31, 2014, 02:20:57 PM
tom just killed it in this thread.. classic tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on January 31, 2014, 02:48:51 PM
So this is up inside one of our toilet stalls. I doubt it helps any.

(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/7apu5umu.jpg)


Why are poop spraying robots using the bathroom at your company?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on January 31, 2014, 03:01:01 PM
So this is up inside one of our toilet stalls. I doubt it helps any.

(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/01/30/7apu5umu.jpg)


Why are poop spraying robots using the bathroom at your company?
Probably why the thread was locked. This is how computers are planning on taking over the world. The thread was locked by computers. This is not a conspiracy. It is real like.
Domo Arrigato Mr. Roboto.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 31, 2014, 03:04:17 PM
this is above my toilet at work. do i work on a 1945 war ship destined for the pacific, you ask? maybe. maybe.


(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7431/12240983385_2ce4d3837e_c.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 11, 2014, 02:16:03 PM
So this image/link was posted on my company's internal website because this dude mentioned some stuff we are close to in his speech.  Anyway, the sign language translator...I've received multiple emails and people have swung by my desk to make sure it's been seen...



Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on February 11, 2014, 02:20:32 PM
So this image/link was posted on my company's internal website because this dude mentioned some stuff we are close to in his speech.  Anyway, the sign language translator...I've received multiple emails and people have swung by my desk to make sure it's been seen...

I've been trying to play that video for way too long.   :facepalm:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on February 11, 2014, 02:38:55 PM
whiskey tango lady that sits near me has a stepson named Tryce
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on February 12, 2014, 09:35:28 AM
At my old job, an older guy worked for me.  He was just generally loud/obnoxous/kind of gross...anyway, he has a son that was horrible; 30 ish, loser. They would get in screaming matches over the phone frequently during work, much of the office could hear.  So, I tried to be polite, and sent him an email during one particularly long call asking him if he could maybe take calls like that on his personal phone outside or in the breakroom.  I thought he got the hint, however, shortly after hanging up with his son, and he'd gotten my message and I think even replied, saying he was sorry and that "David is just a dumbass" he calls up his wife and lets her know that he just got in trouble for yelling at their son during work. He is generally a loud speaker, so everyone also heard that...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sunny_cat on February 12, 2014, 09:37:36 AM
Lol :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on February 13, 2014, 09:22:13 AM
today the resident dork (keep in mind he is pushing 60) came in to show me his latest purchase; the we waited til basketball season tee. says he's planning on wearing it tomorrow for casual friday.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on February 13, 2014, 09:28:02 AM
today the resident dork (keep in mind he is pushing 60) came in to show me his latest purchase; the we waited til basketball season tee. says he's planning on wearing it tomorrow for casual friday.

 :emawkid:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 13, 2014, 09:37:20 AM
 

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Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on February 13, 2014, 09:57:38 AM
today the resident dork (keep in mind he is pushing 60) came in to show me his latest purchase; the we waited til basketball season tee. says he's planning on wearing it tomorrow for casual friday.

thanks for fixing your avi  :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 14, 2014, 02:42:45 PM
So Donna swings by and is like "whoa what are ya doin sittin here?!"  (I switched cubes.)  To which I replied "what are you doing wearing that shirt?"  (Huge jayhawk on red shirt.)  She says "oh it was $5 at TJ Maxx and I don't pass up deals like that!"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on February 14, 2014, 03:55:17 PM
I'm currently sitting here, while one of my coworkers enrolls a student for March. Everything is all fine and dandy, but this student brought in her son who is 2 years old. He's playing with his toy and all i've heard for the last 5 minutes is: "K, K, K, PRESS A SOUND, K, K, K, K, K, K, PRESS A SOUND, K, J, K, K, K, JK, K, K, PRESS A SOUND"  :bang:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on February 14, 2014, 03:58:26 PM
I'm currently sitting here, while one of my coworkers enrolls a student for March. Everything is all fine and dandy, but this student brought in her son who is 2 years old. He's playing with his toy and all i've heard for the last 5 minutes is: "K, K, K, PRESS A SOUND, K, K, K, K, K, K, PRESS A SOUND, K, J, K, K, K, JK, K, K, PRESS A SOUND"  :bang:

That's not very hilarious
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on February 14, 2014, 03:59:57 PM
It is for posters who like missery for all things Fanning. Now the thing is crying.  :curse:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on February 14, 2014, 04:03:00 PM
I think I have a sign on me that says "tell me every excrutiating detail of your weekend plans" today
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: hatingfrancisco on February 14, 2014, 04:03:43 PM
It is for posters who like missery for all things Fanning. Now the thing is crying.  :curse:

You could hit your target audience by just stating these things to a mirror FWIW.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on February 14, 2014, 04:04:21 PM
Not very hilarious, is it?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ben ji on February 20, 2014, 10:38:31 AM
My office is about 90% dudes but we have the same ratio of M to F bathrooms. It's not uncommon to see someone walk in the bathroom, crouch down to see if all the stalls are occupied(they usually are), then walk out to check a different bathroom.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 20, 2014, 10:43:56 AM
My office is about 90% dudes but we have the same ratio of M to F bathrooms. It's not uncommon to see someone walk in the bathroom, crouch down to see if all the stalls are occupied(they usually are), then walk out to check a different bathroom.

Not quite 90/10 here but ya that happens all the time. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: TownieCat on February 20, 2014, 11:01:42 AM
My office is about 90% dudes but we have the same ratio of M to F bathrooms. It's not uncommon to see someone walk in the bathroom, crouch down to see if all the stalls are occupied(they usually are), then walk out to check a different bathroom.

My office has the opposite ratio so I more or less have my own bathroom. This makes my mid-morning routine very relaxing.  :party:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Willesgirl on February 21, 2014, 03:48:06 PM
Not funny, but the lady in the next office is always on the phone with or having her very trashy family in during lunch. They are always having some sort of legal troubles they are trying to hash out.

Today, one of her nieces was in there talking about how one of her baby daddys wanted full custody, and she signed some papers that she thought didn't give him custody, but did. But then some friend told her she should deny she signed it. I can't keep up, and I don't care. But you should hear the conversation. It is like a bunch of idiots trying to make legal plans that are destined to fail. :chainsaw:

Do this crap at home!!!

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on February 21, 2014, 03:57:31 PM
Not funny, but the lady in the next office is always on the phone with or having her very trashy family in during lunch. They are always having some sort of legal troubles they are trying to hash out.

Today, one of her nieces was in there talking about how one of her baby daddys wanted full custody, and she signed some papers that she thought didn't give him custody, but did. But then some friend told her she should deny she signed it. I can't keep up, and I don't care. But you should hear the conversation. It is like a bunch of idiots trying to make legal plans that are destined to fail. :chainsaw:

Do this crap at home!!!
You need a different place of employment. Also, I bet that lady is ALWAYS having her period.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Willesgirl on February 21, 2014, 04:00:38 PM
Not funny, but the lady in the next office is always on the phone with or having her very trashy family in during lunch. They are always having some sort of legal troubles they are trying to hash out.

Today, one of her nieces was in there talking about how one of her baby daddys wanted full custody, and she signed some papers that she thought didn't give him custody, but did. But then some friend told her she should deny she signed it. I can't keep up, and I don't care. But you should hear the conversation. It is like a bunch of idiots trying to make legal plans that are destined to fail. :chainsaw:

Do this crap at home!!!
You need a different place of employment. Also, I bet that lady is ALWAYS having her period.

I do need a new gig, Dobber! But I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. And there are trashy people everywhere. There's virtually no escaping.

You wouldn't know it by looking at the lady in the next office, but... you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl... Sorry. I know that's mean. I've just had enough for one week.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 21, 2014, 04:02:13 PM
Not funny, but the lady in the next office is always on the phone with or having her very trashy family in during lunch. They are always having some sort of legal troubles they are trying to hash out.

Today, one of her nieces was in there talking about how one of her baby daddys wanted full custody, and she signed some papers that she thought didn't give him custody, but did. But then some friend told her she should deny she signed it. I can't keep up, and I don't care. But you should hear the conversation. It is like a bunch of idiots trying to make legal plans that are destined to fail. :chainsaw:

Do this crap at home!!!
You need a different place of employment. Also, I bet that lady is ALWAYS having her period.

I do need a new gig, Dobber! But I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. And there are trashy people everywhere. There's virtually no escaping.

You wouldn't know it by looking at the lady in the next office, but... you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl... Sorry. I know that's mean. I've just had enough for one week.

 :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Willesgirl on February 21, 2014, 04:03:49 PM
Welp. If you guys can tell about my week from bbs posts, then poor Willes.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on February 21, 2014, 04:13:05 PM
Welp. If you guys can tell about my week from bbs posts, then poor Willes.

(http://cdn2.screenjunkies.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/4203778391_ca534c97a9_o.gif)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on February 21, 2014, 04:18:48 PM
pete you should have sung the eric Clapton song back at him when hed correct you.

la-la-la-la-la looooollaaaaaaa

Nobody called this out, so I'm doing it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on February 21, 2014, 04:33:15 PM
pete you should have sung the eric Clapton song back at him when hed correct you.

la-la-la-la-la looooollaaaaaaa

Nobody called this out, so I'm doing it.

lol, now you know why people usually skim tTHoTUC posts
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on February 21, 2014, 04:58:23 PM
Not funny, but the lady in the next office is always on the phone with or having her very trashy family in during lunch. They are always having some sort of legal troubles they are trying to hash out.

Today, one of her nieces was in there talking about how one of her baby daddys wanted full custody, and she signed some papers that she thought didn't give him custody, but did. But then some friend told her she should deny she signed it. I can't keep up, and I don't care. But you should hear the conversation. It is like a bunch of idiots trying to make legal plans that are destined to fail. :chainsaw:

Do this crap at home!!!
You need a different place of employment. Also, I bet that lady is ALWAYS having her period.

I do need a new gig, Dobber! But I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. And there are trashy people everywhere. There's virtually no escaping.

You wouldn't know it by looking at the lady in the next office, but... you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl... Sorry. I know that's mean. I've just had enough for one week.

Like 90% of people in general are disgusting slobs. I try not to think about it too much because I start feeling like a bad person.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: raquetcat on February 26, 2014, 12:26:26 PM
I was listening to a conference call with my boss and we had just called in. She says "yeah I'm just going to pay attention for the second hour, the first hour is going to be a waste of time", but she wasn't on mute! Then the conference call leader was all "yeah we wouldn't want to waste your time :dubious:  luckily no one knew who said it, still pretty :lol: though
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on February 26, 2014, 01:22:49 PM
My office is about 90% dudes but we have the same ratio of M to F bathrooms. It's not uncommon to see someone walk in the bathroom, crouch down to see if all the stalls are occupied(they usually are), then walk out to check a different bathroom.

It's better than the dumbasses who will yank on every handle to see if it's occupied while I'm mid-squeeze.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on February 26, 2014, 05:17:15 PM
Internet has been done for going on two weeks now.  Intranet/Email?  Still up.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on February 26, 2014, 10:35:26 PM
Internet has been done for going on two weeks now.  Intranet/Email?  Still up.

 :cactus:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on February 26, 2014, 10:50:04 PM
Internet has been done for going on two weeks now.  Intranet/Email?  Still up.
Productivity is up 230%
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 27, 2014, 08:34:11 AM
There's a flesh colored dual headed dildo in the street pretty close to work.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: hatingfrancisco on February 27, 2014, 08:39:17 AM
I have a co-worker that is in his upper 30's and still lives with his mom.  He was having a conversation with his mom on the phone trying to get her the wireless password at their home:

Him:  Okay mom, you ready?  The password is muffdiver, muffdiver.......  mom...  its muffdiver......  M-U-F-F-D-I-V-E-R.   No, muff,  muff.... MUFF!  MUFFDIVER.  Mom...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on February 27, 2014, 09:07:32 AM
 :sdeek: Where do you work?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on February 27, 2014, 11:02:33 AM
So there was an email sent to everyone in my company and sister schools informing them to complete online tranings that might be passed due. I walk in today and I have like 80 emails with ppl replying all "done", "I completed mine", "stop replying all", "lol stop replying all everyone", "lol. How's everyones day?", "Jesus, stop it, " :facepalm: ", "stop", so on and so on.

Then this rough ridin' guy throws this wammy in there:

Quote
My last day with the company is tomorrow, therefore, I will most likely not be completing this training. I will be listing “email etiquette” as the second reason for my departure.

and then boom:

Quote
Please note for all of those that are using this chain inappropriately, moving forward all emails will be sent to your supervisors and Human resources. Thank you   

Dumbasses!  :lol: :popcorn:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on February 27, 2014, 11:09:28 AM
Get out of there, WC, before it's too late.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on February 27, 2014, 11:51:53 AM
So there was an email sent to everyone in my company and sister schools informing them to complete online tranings that might be passed due.
:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ben ji on February 27, 2014, 02:22:20 PM
My office is about 90% dudes but we have the same ratio of M to F bathrooms. It's not uncommon to see someone walk in the bathroom, crouch down to see if all the stalls are occupied(they usually are), then walk out to check a different bathroom.

I guess some people like their toilet seats warm. (He is waiting for a stall to be vacated)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on March 04, 2014, 02:53:51 PM
some herp derp going on today;
long and serious discussion that K-State should hope for the NIT, since it would be better for them

oh, and what is up with white sweat socks with dress shoes?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on March 04, 2014, 02:58:55 PM
some herp derp going on today;
long and serious discussion that K-State should hope for the NIT, since it would be better for them

oh, and what is up with white sweat socks with dress shoes?

oh no, this might be me someday...  i HATE dress socks, like... so much.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on March 04, 2014, 03:03:22 PM
some herp derp going on today;
long and serious discussion that K-State should hope for the NIT, since it would be better for them

oh, and what is up with white sweat socks with dress shoes?

oh no, this might be me someday...  i HATE dress socks, like... so much.

Pull the old Fab Five tall black nikes and nobody knows the difference between dress blacks and casual blacks
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on March 04, 2014, 03:04:51 PM
Everybody who is worth a crap knows the difference.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on March 04, 2014, 03:09:22 PM
Everybody who is worth a crap knows the difference.

I work in a pretty relaxed environment so I should have clarified, that in my office, nobody really cares about the difference...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on March 04, 2014, 03:10:08 PM
Everybody already knew that.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on March 04, 2014, 03:11:40 PM
Everything going okay today, bread? You seem to be upset.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on March 04, 2014, 03:12:04 PM
Everybody already knew that.

Fair enough...I like it here. I show up, enjoy the people i'm around, do my work and get paid. Pretty good gig...  :kstategrad:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on March 04, 2014, 03:14:30 PM
dress socks in winter? yuck.  :Yuck:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on March 04, 2014, 03:18:06 PM
dress socks in winter? yuck.  :Yuck:

wouldn't your toes get super cold?   :thumbs: <---but thumbs down
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on March 04, 2014, 03:23:18 PM
@ben ji: you may want to take it easy with the restroom pics.  May be frowned upon or even illegal.  It's a felony in Illinois to take pictures or video in a public restroom of another person without their consent.  It also doesn't require any sort of nudity.  Entirely location specific. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SabiNation on March 04, 2014, 03:24:29 PM
 :horrorsurprise:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on March 04, 2014, 03:25:51 PM
Everything going okay today, bread? You seem to be upset squirrely.

Far less angry than usual.  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on March 04, 2014, 03:26:42 PM
Everything going okay today, bread? You seem to be upset squirrely.

Far less angry than usual.  :dunno:
okay just making sure
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on March 04, 2014, 03:51:37 PM
@ben ji: you may want to take it easy with the restroom pics.  May be frowned upon or even illegal.  It's a felony in Illinois to take pictures or video in a public restroom of another person without their consent.  It also doesn't require any sort of nudity.  Entirely location specific.

already sent his IP address to rick daris' office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 04, 2014, 04:19:46 PM
There is a new guy pumping iron in the space next to me and it's a little uncomfortable.  I think he's only using 25lb dumbells.   :facepalm:  This is what I'm hearing "oh jesus oh yeah ohhh ohhh burn."   :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 10:52:45 AM
He has a partner now and handing the weights off to each other after each set.  They're breathing pretty hard now.  :users: Trying to just stare at my computer screen and not make eye contact.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on March 06, 2014, 10:53:49 AM
Did you get visual confirmation that there were, in fact, dumbbells present?  :Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on March 06, 2014, 10:55:24 AM
need pix plz
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 11:10:38 AM
Did you get visual confirmation that there were, in fact, dumbbells present?  :Wha:

Yes.  They were in my field of view the entire time.  Walked over there when they went to the water cooler and confirmed 25lbs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on March 06, 2014, 11:31:07 AM
Did you get visual confirmation that there were, in fact, dumbbells present?  :Wha:

Yes.  They were in my field of view the entire time.  Walked over there when they went to the water cooler and confirmed 25lbs.

You work in an office environment?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on March 06, 2014, 11:32:57 AM
BF is a personal trainer  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on March 06, 2014, 11:33:45 AM
You work in an office environment?

i thought he was a stay-at-home dad :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 11:36:22 AM
You work in an office environment?

i thought he was a stay-at-home dad :frown:

Seasonal worker now.  I can leave when ever my farm gets busy.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 11:41:57 AM
You work in an office environment?

50/50 instructor/office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on March 06, 2014, 11:49:57 AM
You work in an office environment?

50/50 instructor/office.

Workout instruction?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 11:52:04 AM
You work in an office environment?

50/50 instructor/office.

Workout instruction?

No
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on March 06, 2014, 12:14:44 PM
He teaches people how to work on Diesel engines, duh.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on March 06, 2014, 12:17:04 PM
scuba dive instructor

(http://cdn.pophangover.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/nailed-it.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on March 06, 2014, 12:45:47 PM
Get off my nutz guys.  #feedingtheworld #injohndeeregreen #curiousgeorge
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on March 13, 2014, 11:12:37 AM
There is a guy wearing those shoes with toes in the office today.
I can't say too much though because I was wearing paper flip flops for a couple of hours after my lunch pedicure yesterday.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on March 13, 2014, 11:26:05 AM
So I've seen this guy a couple of times now:

Largeish-not mangino-large but hefty,  dress pants, blazer, with a cartoon tie (like bugs and daffy with a wood sledge hammer), long gray hair in a pony with a gray 'stasch, not too crazy right?

well he brings his lunch in a small pink striped victoria secret bag... :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on March 13, 2014, 12:37:43 PM
So I've seen this guy a couple of times now:

Largeish-not mangino-large but hefty,  dress pants, blazer, with a cartoon tie (like bugs and daffy with a wood sledge hammer), long gray hair in a pony with a gray 'stasch, not too crazy right?

well he brings his lunch in a small pink striped victoria secret bag... :sdeek:

wow

this is a person you NEED to know
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 06:31:00 PM
So, yeah just chatting with a dude and he shares with me that he drove twelve rough ridin' hours to New rough ridin' Orleans just to see, GET THIS, Widespread rough ridin' Panic.  AAAAND he had never even them or really even heard of them before!  He was just like, "Yeah, they were pretty good."  WHAT. IN. THE. eff!?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on March 20, 2014, 06:36:25 PM

So, yeah just chatting with a dude and he shares with me that he drove twelve rough ridin' hours to New rough ridin' Orleans just to see, GET THIS, Widespread rough ridin' Panic.  AAAAND he had never even them or really even heard of them before!  He was just like, "Yeah, they were pretty good."  WHAT. IN. THE. eff!?

eff, wow
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 20, 2014, 07:12:35 PM
that sounds like a fun road trip
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 08:12:32 PM
It did not sound like fun at all!  Although, it was not super serious business like flying to Vegas in order to spend $400 on two tickets to see Tool.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on March 20, 2014, 08:13:44 PM
that also sounds fun
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 09:06:08 PM
See, when I say that he took a road trip JUST TO SEE Widespread Panic, I mean that nothing else was on the agenda.  Including fun.  And if you think that seeing Widespread Panic is fun, you're just wrong.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 20, 2014, 09:09:32 PM
Life is what you make of it, chum1. As are road trips to see Widespread Panic.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 09:24:02 PM
Thanks.  I will tell him that the trip he thought sucked was actually fun after all.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 20, 2014, 09:30:04 PM
Oh, HE thought it sucked, too? :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: yoga-like_abana on March 20, 2014, 09:50:31 PM
Classic mighigancat mixup


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 10:01:25 PM
I was too dumbfounded at the time to be tactful enough to ask about his motives without possibly offending him.  He wasn't some huge fan of theirs, yet seeing them was apparently the only focus of the trip rather than part of some scheme to go party in New Orleans or have fun on the road or whatever.  I will follow up tomorrow.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 10:14:17 PM
Classic mighigancat mixup

I didn't do a good job of conveying how bizarre this guy's story was.  It doesn't help that his English isn't great and I have to piece together nonlinear fragments.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 20, 2014, 10:33:59 PM
is he foreign?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on March 20, 2014, 10:38:38 PM
If you offered me $100 to walk across the street from my house to see a Widespread Panic concert, I would tell you "no," and I'd call the cops to shut down that concert.

If I wanted to hear a piece of crap replica of the Alman Brothers and Dead, I'd just listen to them, and not listen to those assholes.  I do not like songs that last 30 minutes.   Nor do most human beings on the face of the planet.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kim carnes on March 20, 2014, 10:45:13 PM
i don't get chum1's avatar
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on March 20, 2014, 10:47:17 PM
If you offered me $100 to walk across the street from my house to see a Widespread Panic concert, I would tell you "no," and I'd call the cops to shut down that concert.

If I wanted to hear a piece of crap replica of the Alman Brothers and Dead, I'd just listen to them, and not listen to those assholes.  I do not like songs that last 30 minutes.   Nor do most human beings on the face of the planet.

Ya, but NO is great.

Sent from my KFTT using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 20, 2014, 11:33:51 PM
is he foreign?

Colombian
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on March 20, 2014, 11:39:53 PM
If you offered me $100 to walk across the street from my house to see a Widespread Panic concert, I would tell you "no," and I'd call the cops to shut down that concert.

If I wanted to hear a piece of crap replica of the Alman Brothers and Dead, I'd just listen to them, and not listen to those assholes.  I do not like songs that last 30 minutes.   Nor do most human beings on the face of the planet.

@johnnywichita
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on March 20, 2014, 11:57:15 PM
so the guy is a foreigner that likes drugs but has never heard of wsp? is that where we are at in this convo or did I miss something?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on March 21, 2014, 12:04:06 AM
If you offered me $100 to walk across the street from my house to see a Widespread Panic concert, I would tell you "no," and I'd call the cops to shut down that concert.

If I wanted to hear a piece of crap replica of the Alman Brothers and Dead, I'd just listen to them, and not listen to those assholes.  I do not like songs that last 30 minutes.   Nor do most human beings on the face of the planet.

How do you feel about songs that last one hour?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 21, 2014, 12:06:08 AM
so the guy is a foreigner that likes drugs but has never heard of wsp? is that where we are at in this convo or did I miss something?

Do you have any questions you'd like me to ask him tomorrow? 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on March 21, 2014, 12:06:34 AM
ask him if he'd say he had fun
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on March 21, 2014, 12:51:20 AM
If you offered me $100 to walk across the street from my house to see a Widespread Panic concert, I would tell you "no," and I'd call the cops to shut down that concert.

If I wanted to hear a piece of crap replica of the Alman Brothers and Dead, I'd just listen to them, and not listen to those assholes.  I do not like songs that last 30 minutes.   Nor do most human beings on the face of the planet.

How do you feel about songs that last one hour?

like, tell me how you feel about this ->
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on March 21, 2014, 06:58:59 AM
Tobias next time Tool plays in Vegas for the bargain basement price of $200/ticket, I will meet you at the Excalibur slots
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on March 21, 2014, 09:13:41 AM
He's a mule and the WP was his cover.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 24, 2014, 07:21:40 PM
I enjoyed this:

http://blog.relationshipsurgery.com/employee-quit-job-horribly-responds-worse/
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on March 24, 2014, 07:38:28 PM
i don't get chum1's avatar

i don't know what the connection to steven baldwin is but i did meet him on friday (top right) at the beanery in westwood, ca. 

(http://i666.photobucket.com/albums/vv23/jeremy365/photo-1.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on March 24, 2014, 07:47:23 PM
i don't get chum1's avatar

i don't know what the connection to steven baldwin is but i did meet him on friday (top right) at the beanery in westwood, ca. 

(http://i666.photobucket.com/albums/vv23/jeremy365/photo-1.jpg)

how do you know that wasn't chum?


http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=24582.msg669992#msg669992
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on March 24, 2014, 07:58:07 PM
that would make sense, actually.  because when he sat next to me at the bar and i said, "hello steven" and introduced myself, he looked very deeply into my soul as if to be thinking, "i've met this man before, but i don't know where".
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on March 24, 2014, 08:13:48 PM
that would make sense, actually.  because when he sat next to me at the bar and i said, "hello steven" and introduced myself, he looked very deeply into my soul as if to be thinking, "i've met this man before, but i don't know where".

but at the end of the day, haven't we really all already met each other before? is the world nothing but a never ending circle? am i my brothers keeper? quite the thoughts but i think maybe.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: HerrSonntag on March 24, 2014, 10:29:11 PM
I enjoyed this:

http://blog.relationshipsurgery.com/employee-quit-job-horribly-responds-worse/
hoax: http://www.cbsnews.com/news/jenny-the-hopa-job-quitting-girl-a-hoax-duh/ (http://www.cbsnews.com/news/jenny-the-hopa-job-quitting-girl-a-hoax-duh/)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 24, 2014, 10:35:09 PM
Welp!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on March 25, 2014, 09:12:13 AM
So I've seen this guy a couple of times now:

Largeish-not mangino-large but hefty,  dress pants, blazer, with a cartoon tie (like bugs and daffy with a wood sledge hammer), long gray hair in a pony with a gray 'stasch, not too crazy right?

well he brings his lunch in a small pink striped victoria secret bag... :sdeek:

The VS bag is his very subtle way of telling everyone he is getting some play despite his appearance
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 26, 2014, 08:58:29 AM
I don't know where this belongs, BUT OMG MAKE IT STOP....

Boss man is gone this morning and 4 of my coworkers (all females) are gathered together in the corner 2 cubes over talking about bad sex. Apparently one of them hooked up with a guy for the first time last night and not only did this guy not know what he was doing, but he also had a really small package. Apparently this guy has to walk the plank now and now all the girls feel like they should share their awful experiences and all the small weiners they have seen. They're using awkward analogies too... "Like, I've seen a movie before and thought it was bad, but I went back to rewatch it again and i found a place where I could enjoy it" etc.

LIKE OMG MAKE IT STOP NOW!!!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dlew12 on March 26, 2014, 09:02:52 AM
Head over there and join in Fandawg!  Time to dish!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 26, 2014, 09:12:45 AM
 :lol: Should I do it like i'm talking to my bros? Like OMG, could you imagine if roles were reversed? Every dude would be getting a call from HR.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on March 26, 2014, 09:13:33 AM
push the envelope, watch it bend
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on March 26, 2014, 09:22:08 AM
this is your chance to respect four chicks at the same time
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on March 26, 2014, 10:22:36 AM
You know when your superior leaves and you get named his replacement so it's like a promotion but without a change in official title and no pay increase?  That's hilarious.   :lol:

( :frown:)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on March 26, 2014, 10:56:45 AM
I don't know where this belongs, BUT OMG MAKE IT STOP....

Boss man is gone this morning and 4 of my coworkers (all females) are gathered together in the corner 2 cubes over talking about bad sex. Apparently one of them hooked up with a guy for the first time last night and not only did this guy not know what he was doing, but he also had a really small package. Apparently this guy has to walk the plank now and now all the girls feel like they should share their awful experiences and all the small weiners they have seen. They're using awkward analogies too... "Like, I've seen a movie before and thought it was bad, but I went back to rewatch it again and i found a place where I could enjoy it" etc.

LIKE OMG MAKE IT STOP NOW!!!

Funny, I heard a different take on that hookup.  Dude said it wasn't an issue of small penis, but rather huge vagina.  Huge. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on March 26, 2014, 11:48:34 AM
I don't know where this belongs, BUT OMG MAKE IT STOP....

Boss man is gone this morning and 4 of my coworkers (all females) are gathered together in the corner 2 cubes over talking about bad sex. Apparently one of them hooked up with a guy for the first time last night and not only did this guy not know what he was doing, but he also had a really small package. Apparently this guy has to walk the plank now and now all the girls feel like they should share their awful experiences and all the small weiners they have seen. They're using awkward analogies too... "Like, I've seen a movie before and thought it was bad, but I went back to rewatch it again and i found a place where I could enjoy it" etc.

LIKE OMG MAKE IT STOP NOW!!!

Funny, I heard a different take on that hookup.  Dude said it wasn't an issue of small penis, but rather huge vagina.  Huge.

Do girls ask each other how deep they are?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 26, 2014, 11:50:18 AM
French Canadian and Indiana shared a pretty good laugh about the Malaysian Airlines plane being stealthier than a stealth bomber meme.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on March 26, 2014, 01:48:19 PM
French Canadian and Indiana shared a pretty good laugh about the Malaysian Airlines plane being stealthier than a stealth bomber meme.
It made me chuckle :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on March 26, 2014, 01:55:05 PM
WildcatNKilt and I just saw one another  :Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WildcatNkilt on March 26, 2014, 01:56:47 PM
WildcatNKilt and I just saw one another  :Wha:

It gets crazy in this office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 26, 2014, 02:09:12 PM
French Canadian and Indiana shared a pretty good laugh about the Malaysian Airlines plane being stealthier than a stealth bomber meme.
It made me chuckle :dunno:


me too, I guess. :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 27, 2014, 11:06:06 AM
The girl who was talking about little weiners yesterday, is now  :bawl: in her cube. All the girls are over there consoling her. I hope everything is ok.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 27, 2014, 11:10:08 AM
Just picked up on it. The guy who she was bitching about having a little weiner and who she was going to make walk the plank for it, dumped her first last night. Karma.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on March 27, 2014, 11:10:46 AM
Little prick guy left
A hole in her heart so big
She'll never fill it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on March 27, 2014, 11:11:36 AM
now's your chance to swoop in and tell her about your forkball, fanman
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on March 27, 2014, 11:13:42 AM
Little prick guy left
A hole in her heart so big
She'll never fill it.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 27, 2014, 11:14:35 AM
now's your chance to swoop in and tell her about your forkball, fanman
:nono: she'll never see my forkball.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on March 27, 2014, 11:25:24 AM
Just picked up on it. The guy who she was bitching about having a little weiner and who she was going to make walk the plank for it, dumped her first last night. Karma.  :lol:
Giant vagina confirmed
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on April 30, 2014, 06:22:17 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/05/01/3ynuhu9a.jpg)

:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on April 30, 2014, 06:46:09 PM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/05/01/3ynuhu9a.jpg)

:D

"We know, godamnit! -Us"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 01, 2014, 05:48:54 AM
You work with Wacky?


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on May 01, 2014, 06:50:46 AM
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/05/01/3ynuhu9a.jpg)

:D

"We know, godamnit! -Us"

:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on May 01, 2014, 08:14:13 AM
Just picked up on it. The guy who she was bitching about having a little weiner and who she was going to make walk the plank for it, dumped her first last night. Karma.  :lol:
Giant vagina confirmed
Haha yeah. Send her an email that says nothing but "Hotdogs, hallways".
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 01, 2014, 09:03:04 AM
Welp, I guess if this central nervous system thing doesn't work out, I will apparently fit right in at a facilities job.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 01, 2014, 09:07:45 AM
Welp, I guess if this central nervous system thing doesn't work out, I will apparently fit right in at a facilities job.
You will need patients.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 01, 2014, 09:22:22 AM
Welp, I guess if this central nervous system thing doesn't work out, I will apparently fit right in at a facilities job.
You will need patients.

Given that this job is in San Fran, I could wear a lab coat ironically to work while asking for patients.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 01, 2014, 09:25:07 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on May 01, 2014, 09:28:02 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 01, 2014, 09:29:33 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this

Yes, but this is potentially work related.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on May 01, 2014, 09:33:26 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this

Yes, but this is potentially work related.

there are like 8k hotels in cancun so why pick that one unless that's your intent.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 01, 2014, 09:33:56 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this

Yes, but this is potentially work related.

there are like 8k hotels in cancun so why pick that one unless that's your intent.

Exactly!  :eek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on May 01, 2014, 09:35:22 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this

Yes, but this is potentially work related.

there are like 8k hotels in cancun so why pick that one unless that's your intent.
Maybe he's a romatic at heart
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 01, 2014, 09:35:43 AM
Is Cancun Desire like only a swingers place?

there is a thread for this

Yes, but this is potentially work related.
:Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 01, 2014, 09:43:34 AM
I think a co worker went there last week.  Probably zero chance of actually confirming it now that he knows I know what it is.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on May 09, 2014, 04:38:36 PM
Quote
My First Day:

Heyyyy guys!

Well, today was my very first day. I was originally told that I would be going to a client site today but unfortunately, that does not begin until Wednesday so I am stuck in the office for another day. I originally thought that I would be doing absolutely nothing but stare into space for eight hours but I was wrong. That would have been more worth my while than what I did. I did jack crap. Jack. crap.

I stepped in the office at 9 am and stared into the abyss for a good solid hour before I even attempted to do anything. I let the emails roll in with zero care in the entire world. About an hour into the day, I thought it would be a wise career move to maybe check them. Nope. I was assigned the task of looking up 2300 client year ends and putting them in a spreadsheet. The title of this assignment was "Postcards!!!" (email title from my manager. Exclamation points were seriously over-utilized and my superior was a little overzealous).

Now you guys have known me long enough that concepts understood by 10-12 year olds might go over my head so of course I had a question. I wandered around the office for a solid 10 minutes trying to find this woman so she could give me guidance on this mindless and meaningless task. She was nowhere to be found. This confused me even more so I needed a mental timeout. After 30 minutes of sitting on my ass, I decided to wing it. (Manager wasn't in the office...found this out after I wandered around the office like an idiot). I hope I did this simple assignment right but if I didn't, I don't think anyone will care because only the worst "Postcards!!!" have fiscal year ends on them. What a shitty postcard.

Lunch time was awesome because it was paid for by the company and it took 90 minutes. We did go to a seafood restaurant (which smelled like crap but it was free) and I ordered a cheeseburger smothered in ketchup. At this point, Emily decided to tell everyone about my absurd ketchup addiction so I fielded questions about my disgusting eating habits from complete strangers who also work in my company. What a great first impression...I'm the guy who orders hamburgers at a seafood restaurant, defiles them with a half bottle of ketchup, and I eat slop like a pig. Life is glorious.

After lunch, I was informed about those CPE training tests we have to take. What a load of crap. I thought I could wing them and pass. Wrong. So wrong. I got a 20% on the "judgment" exam. Nothing like another test that implies my inability to complete my job with moderate, even minuscule, success. But a 20% when you try? eff me sideways with a lunchbox, that's devastatingly horrible. Then I realized that I have only two more opportunities to do this? Christ. After I got around the ego demoralization, I made the conscious decision to surf the web for a solid 3 hours. I found an invention that is available for $35 that gives you the ability to vaporize alcohol and inhale it and get drunk. That's the last thing I need...more ways to get mumped up that are fiscally responsible. Seriously, you might see me on the news one day all cracked out on Jim Beam offering sexual favors for a hit of alcohol. This is the crap I thought about all day.

Well, that was my first day! So fun and enlightening. I really put all the knowledge I obtained while at the Q Center to great use. Even my handy "ask your superior" panacea didn't aid me in my struggles. I hope that all of your days were equally as entertaining. My shed had no crickets but I came home to my fridge and freezer completely defrosted. There is mold all over my fridge and it smells like dead bodies but it did not affect the quality of my Natural Lights that were stored in that crap box. I would know because I am drinking them now to ease the "stress" that my first day caused me. It's gonna be a long career hahaha.

I hope to hear from all of you soon!

Cameron
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 09, 2014, 04:46:41 PM
 :lol: :love: :eek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 09, 2014, 04:50:06 PM
I wanna party with cameron.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on May 09, 2014, 04:51:19 PM
i stumbled on a gold mine today. here's another one. disclaimer, i changed the names and company info (most of it anyway)

Quote
My First Engagement:
What's up fuckazZzZz!

OK, so I meant to send you guys an email about my very first day on my very first engagement but crap got out of control last night. I ended up hitting the bar with a potential roommate (yes, I might be moving out of the shed) then I ended up getting real drunk in the shed. Embarrassing, yes. Fun, kinda? Anyway, that's my embarrassing/alcoholic reason as to why I did not reach out and network with my peers.

Back to the engagement. Guys, if you thought I was in over my head after orientation, you should see me now. I am just comically unprepared and hilariously incompetent. The worst part is, it is only TWO of us at the client site. TWO! Do you know what that means? It is me and some poor senior who fields my stupid rough ridin' questions at least every two minutes. Company XYZ really crap the bed on this one. How do you assign one senior to possibly one of the worst auditors this side of the Mississippi?? I need a sit down with someone Dave Alexander to explain to him that I need more support. Check that, I am sure that my senior (Mitch) will do that himself. I bet he is so sick of my nasally voice and my workplace gaffes. If I had to rate myself on a percentile basis, I would rate myself somewhere in the fourth or fifth percentile. That's shockingly below average. I can't be the worst though. There is no way, right? I'm sure Bombshell has to suck at auditing. For Christ sakes she wore leopard print pants to Betty Anderson’s seminar. I might not know how to connect to VPN or even put my correct phone number in my signature (some poor HR woman in my office had her cell phone number distributed to so many people who shouldn't have it) but I know what appropriate clothing is and I know how to not look like a hooker. At least I have that going for me...which is nice.

OK so yesterday I showed up to the client 20 minutes early. I felt like this was a solid move. It showed that I am eager to start and ready to rock out some audits. No. This was a poor move. My senior was 10 minutes late so I ended up looking like a rough ridin' dick, sitting alone in a big ass conference room, billing them my rate for looking up the cheapest liquor prices in a 15 mile radius. I am dedicated to my job, right?. Anyway, he shows up and the crap show begins. He literally assigned me 20 forms to look at and edit. Excuse me? Do you know what I am able to do? I will photocopy the crap out of a document but I can't perform a walkthrough for dick. One of the more epic quotes pertaining to my ineptitude was said today by Mitch. "Cameron, you signed off on EVERY SINGLE document in the caseware database! You haven't even done anything in the last 30 minutes." That was a solid move.

However, the best display of my inability to comprehend any small procedure occurred when I was given a 0340 form to do. This was a poor move by Mitch. He legitimately thought I could do it. He was in for a surprise. Earlier today, I learned that Mitch was up until 12:30 cleaning up after hurricane Cameron got a hold of some documents. Poor guy. Anyway, back to the 0340 document. I got it back and it had 34 comments. THIRTY. FOUR. How the eff does this happen?? The thing was, I actually tried to complete this document successfully. What had happened was I actually did nothing correctly. On top of that, I typed over some of the progress that Mitch had made on the form so I took us back a solid few steps. Future CEO right??

Anyway, Mitch deserves 10 accolades for having to put up with my remedial ass. I don't think he was ready to be paired with someone as devastatingly behind as me. He was not amused when I told him that there was "less than a 5% chance that I complete the whole 0340 form flawlessly." I bet he's cleaning up all the messes I made today right now.

So this is all for now. I'm sure I will have some more solid stories later. Do any of you know of any janitorial jobs available??

Your favorite person who is bad at his job,
Cameron
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on May 09, 2014, 04:52:13 PM
Is that an email or what am I looking at here?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 'taterblast on May 09, 2014, 04:52:42 PM
Is that an email or what am I looking at here?

they're emails to his coworker friends
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Panjandrum on May 09, 2014, 04:58:14 PM
I'm telling you, right now, that this Cameron guy is going to be one of those Silicon Valley app developers that ends up getting bought by Google.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: TheProdigiousTalent on May 21, 2014, 01:38:38 AM
So there was an email sent to everyone in my company and sister schools informing them to complete online tranings that might be passed due. I walk in today and I have like 80 emails with ppl replying all "done", "I completed mine", "stop replying all", "lol stop replying all everyone", "lol. How's everyones day?", "Jesus, stop it, " :facepalm: ", "stop", so on and so on.

Then this rough ridin' guy throws this wammy in there:

Quote
My last day with the company is tomorrow, therefore, I will most likely not be completing this training. I will be listing “email etiquette” as the second reason for my departure.

and then boom:

Quote
Please note for all of those that are using this chain inappropriately, moving forward all emails will be sent to your supervisors and Human resources. Thank you   

Dumbasses!  :lol: :popcorn:

This guy may spend much of his career searching for a place where people are universally observant/conscientious enough to avoid including e-mail addresses in mass e-mails' to:/cc: fields and replying all to such e-mails.  Sadly (or hilariously, depending on your perspective), it's almost certainly the case that any large organization with large e-mail distributions and without safeguards to curtail this kind of thing has the ocasional self-sustaining moron self-identification e-mail thread.  When this happens, I just grab some popcorn and sit back and watch with glee as the cacophony of stupidity crescendoes.  I remember two massive threads - one with thousands of recipients - that went on for days / hundreds of e-mails (including scores of PhDs saying things like "Pls remove me!  Why are you e-mailing me?  I did not sign up."  And "Me too").  Dumb/careless people are everywhere.  Just amazing/cringeworthy/delightful.

Pro tip: If someone from your team dons a dunce cap and joins the parade, you're pretty much forced to rethink your hiring standards and interview process.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 21, 2014, 08:16:50 AM
http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21202.msg537679#msg537679 (http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21202.msg537679#msg537679)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on May 21, 2014, 09:19:22 AM
Quote
My First Day:

Heyyyy guys!

Well, today was my very first day. I was originally told that I would be going to a client site today but unfortunately, that does not begin until Wednesday so I am stuck in the office for another day. I originally thought that I would be doing absolutely nothing but stare into space for eight hours but I was wrong. That would have been more worth my while than what I did. I did jack crap. Jack. crap.

I stepped in the office at 9 am and stared into the abyss for a good solid hour before I even attempted to do anything. I let the emails roll in with zero care in the entire world. About an hour into the day, I thought it would be a wise career move to maybe check them. Nope. I was assigned the task of looking up 2300 client year ends and putting them in a spreadsheet. The title of this assignment was "Postcards!!!" (email title from my manager. Exclamation points were seriously over-utilized and my superior was a little overzealous).

Now you guys have known me long enough that concepts understood by 10-12 year olds might go over my head so of course I had a question. I wandered around the office for a solid 10 minutes trying to find this woman so she could give me guidance on this mindless and meaningless task. She was nowhere to be found. This confused me even more so I needed a mental timeout. After 30 minutes of sitting on my ass, I decided to wing it. (Manager wasn't in the office...found this out after I wandered around the office like an idiot). I hope I did this simple assignment right but if I didn't, I don't think anyone will care because only the worst "Postcards!!!" have fiscal year ends on them. What a shitty postcard.

Lunch time was awesome because it was paid for by the company and it took 90 minutes. We did go to a seafood restaurant (which smelled like crap but it was free) and I ordered a cheeseburger smothered in ketchup. At this point, Emily decided to tell everyone about my absurd ketchup addiction so I fielded questions about my disgusting eating habits from complete strangers who also work in my company. What a great first impression...I'm the guy who orders hamburgers at a seafood restaurant, defiles them with a half bottle of ketchup, and I eat slop like a pig. Life is glorious.

After lunch, I was informed about those CPE training tests we have to take. What a load of crap. I thought I could wing them and pass. Wrong. So wrong. I got a 20% on the "judgment" exam. Nothing like another test that implies my inability to complete my job with moderate, even minuscule, success. But a 20% when you try? eff me sideways with a lunchbox, that's devastatingly horrible. Then I realized that I have only two more opportunities to do this? Christ. After I got around the ego demoralization, I made the conscious decision to surf the web for a solid 3 hours. I found an invention that is available for $35 that gives you the ability to vaporize alcohol and inhale it and get drunk. That's the last thing I need...more ways to get mumped up that are fiscally responsible. Seriously, you might see me on the news one day all cracked out on Jim Beam offering sexual favors for a hit of alcohol. This is the crap I thought about all day.

Well, that was my first day! So fun and enlightening. I really put all the knowledge I obtained while at the Q Center to great use. Even my handy "ask your superior" panacea didn't aid me in my struggles. I hope that all of your days were equally as entertaining. My shed had no crickets but I came home to my fridge and freezer completely defrosted. There is mold all over my fridge and it smells like dead bodies but it did not affect the quality of my Natural Lights that were stored in that crap box. I would know because I am drinking them now to ease the "stress" that my first day caused me. It's gonna be a long career hahaha.

I hope to hear from all of you soon!

Cameron

Emily sounds like a real bitch
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 09:45:18 AM
Quote
Calls   58   42   299   0   65   49(Training)
Appointments   1   2   4   0   2   0
Re-Scheduled   0   0   0   0   0   2
Interviews   0   1   1   0   1   1
Applications   0   1   1   0   0   0

I found this entertaining. This was yesterdays productivity. Out of 6 advisers, I out called them all.  :eek: :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on May 22, 2014, 09:48:50 AM
i don't know what i'm reading, but you have a 1.3% success rate?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 09:58:15 AM
i don't know what i'm reading, but you have a 1.3% success rate?
You have no clue the crap they give us to call. Some of this stuff has been in the system since 2000. It took 299 calls to make 4 appointments and only had voice-to-voice with 20 answering and 16 telling me to go eff myself and to take them off the list.  :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 22, 2014, 10:02:28 AM
i don't know what i'm reading, but you have a 1.3% success rate?
You have no clue the crap they give us to call. Some of this stuff has been in the system since 2000. It took 299 calls to make 4 appointments and only had voice-to-voice with 20 answering and 16 telling me to go eff myself and to take them off the list.  :D
What is your close rate on the appointments?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 10:04:02 AM
i don't know what i'm reading, but you have a 1.3% success rate?
You have no clue the crap they give us to call. Some of this stuff has been in the system since 2000. It took 299 calls to make 4 appointments and only had voice-to-voice with 20 answering and 16 telling me to go eff myself and to take them off the list.  :D
What is your close rate on the appointments?
68%. We get a lot of shoppers.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 22, 2014, 10:43:14 AM
#wacky4USPS
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 10:46:49 AM
#wacky4USPS
:thumbs:  ;)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 22, 2014, 10:48:23 AM
#wacky4USPS
Except my $numbers just got crushed. I read charts worse than mocat does math.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Boom Roasted on May 22, 2014, 10:49:11 AM
Looks like wacky should be leading the office. Or telling his boss the leads are crap while hoping the guy goes on a glen Gary glen Ross rant
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 10:51:12 AM
Yeah, it's no use. It's very unorganized here. Mailmen get laid, right? RIGHT?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 22, 2014, 10:52:38 AM
Yeah, it's no use. It's very unorganized here. Mailmen get laid, right? RIGHT?
according to this, they do: milfgetsspecialdeliveryfrommailman.com (http://milfgetsspecialdeliveryfrommailman.com)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 22, 2014, 11:03:31 AM
Yeah, it's no use. It's very unorganized here. Mailmen get laid, right? RIGHT?
according to this, they do: milfgetsspecialdeliveryfrommailman.com (http://milfgetsspecialdeliveryfrommailman.com)

sorry, thats bullshit. only plumbers and pizza guys get laid
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 11:05:13 AM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 11:06:31 AM
What's on a higher scale for a female? A guy w/ an MBA who recruits students at a private school or a mailman? It's a toss up, right? RIGHT?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 22, 2014, 11:08:18 AM
What's on a higher scale for a female? A guy w/ an MBA who recruits students at a private school or a mailman? It's a toss up, right? RIGHT?

The mailman probably has a hotter bod from walking all day.  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 11:08:59 AM
What's on a higher scale for a female? A guy w/ an MBA who recruits students at a private school or a mailman? It's a toss up, right? RIGHT?

The mailman probably has a hotter bod from walking all day.  :dunno:
That's what i'm thinking!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on May 22, 2014, 08:22:09 PM
You called more people in 2 hours than any of them did all day, thats pretty impressive wacky  :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 08:46:34 PM
You called more people in 2 hours than any of them did all day, thats pretty impressive wacky  :thumbs:
:thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on May 22, 2014, 09:03:40 PM
Wacky, it is time to get out of the minors and get called up to pharmaceuticals. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 22, 2014, 09:24:47 PM
Wacky, it is time to get out of the minors and get called up to pharmaceuticals.
I agree. My confidence got rocked from the software sales job. It feels nice to go back down to single A ball and hit the crap out of it to feel good again. I'm taking the Moose stance on getting back to the show.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 23, 2014, 09:26:16 AM
What's on a higher scale for a female? A guy w/ an MBA who recruits students at a private school or a mailman? It's a toss up, right? RIGHT?

The mailman probably has a hotter bod from walking all day.  :dunno:
That's what i'm thinking!

The mailman also gets better pay and benefits. You would get to retire on a pension. If you enjoy walking the neighborhood and filling people's boxes with crap they won't bother reading, it really would be a great job.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 23, 2014, 09:32:02 AM
What's on a higher scale for a female? A guy w/ an MBA who recruits students at a private school or a mailman? It's a toss up, right? RIGHT?

The mailman probably has a hotter bod from walking all day.  :dunno:
That's what i'm thinking!

The mailman also gets better pay and benefits. You would get to retire on a pension. If you enjoy walking the neighborhood and filling people's boxes with crap they won't bother reading, it really would be a great job.

Wacky, if you like filling women's boxes with your junk; then be a mailman.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on May 23, 2014, 09:43:37 AM
299 / 8 = 37ish calls per hour and holy crap that sounds terrible... Ts and Ps
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SPEmaw on May 23, 2014, 10:18:32 AM
This really proper guy at my office that everyone hates because he has such an incredible vocabulary that it makes them assume he's patronizing him asked me if I use Twitter. I said yes. He mentioned that his son was soon to be the valedictorian of Rockhurst High and some classmates had made a fake twitter account using his son's name and picture. The account featured many tweets regarding hot mothers (he used "cougars" with a  :confused: tone  :lol: ) who he was going to seek out after his speech to make out with in the janitor's closet, etc. Some of them were about professors he regretted not pursuing while he was in school. Anyway, he asked me to locate the account and do my best to get it removed. As I read through the tweets it was so hard not to bust up laughing but couldn't since he was right there. He mentioned that his FBI friend was looking into it but hoped I could help.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 23, 2014, 10:24:37 AM
Yeah, i'm pretty miserable right now you guys. I really feel like i'm wasting my education here. It's a numbers game and you can't even control them from walking in those doors after you schedule them (which 60% off them don't show). :sigh:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Fedor on May 23, 2014, 10:29:33 AM
Yeah, i'm pretty miserable right now you guys. I really feel like i'm wasting my education here. It's a numbers game and you can't even control them from walking in those doors after you schedule them (which 60% off them don't show). :sigh:
Please tell me you are actively pursuing another job.  You have had a taste of a big boy career, it is there again waiting for you Wacky.  All you need to do is reach out and grab it. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 23, 2014, 10:41:40 AM
Yeah, i'm pretty miserable right now you guys. I really feel like i'm wasting my education here. It's a numbers game and you can't even control them from walking in those doors after you schedule them (which 60% off them don't show). :sigh:
Please tell me you are actively pursuing another job.  You have had a taste of a big boy career, it is there again waiting for you Wacky.  All you need to do is reach out and grab it.
Yes, I will be soon. I feel like I need to put in a year here tho. It looks bad jumping from job to job on the resume, right?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 23, 2014, 10:54:25 AM
No, it does not look bad. You were laid off from your last job and took a step backwards. You don't want to look comfortable in taking a step backwards. You should be out their trying to get something better.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on May 23, 2014, 10:58:17 AM
This really proper guy at my office that everyone hates because he has such an incredible vocabulary that it makes them assume he's patronizing him asked me if I use Twitter. I said yes. He mentioned that his son was soon to be the valedictorian of Rockhurst High and some classmates had made a fake twitter account using his son's name and picture. The account featured many tweets regarding hot mothers (he used "cougars" with a  :confused: tone  :lol: ) who he was going to seek out after his speech to make out with in the janitor's closet, etc. Some of them were about professors he regretted not pursuing while he was in school. Anyway, he asked me to locate the account and do my best to get it removed. As I read through the tweets it was so hard not to bust up laughing but couldn't since he was right there. He mentioned that his FBI friend was looking into it but hoped I could help.

why wouldn't you share this fake account and all the laughs?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SPEmaw on May 23, 2014, 11:01:35 AM
This really proper guy at my office that everyone hates because he has such an incredible vocabulary that it makes them assume he's patronizing him asked me if I use Twitter. I said yes. He mentioned that his son was soon to be the valedictorian of Rockhurst High and some classmates had made a fake twitter account using his son's name and picture. The account featured many tweets regarding hot mothers (he used "cougars" with a  :confused: tone  :lol: ) who he was going to seek out after his speech to make out with in the janitor's closet, etc. Some of them were about professors he regretted not pursuing while he was in school. Anyway, he asked me to locate the account and do my best to get it removed. As I read through the tweets it was so hard not to bust up laughing but couldn't since he was right there. He mentioned that his FBI friend was looking into it but hoped I could help.

why wouldn't you share this fake account and all the laughs?

I didn't know this thread existed at the time and it has since been deleted. I'll try to find some old e-mails where I might've quoted the tweets.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 23, 2014, 11:05:31 AM
No, it does not look bad. You were laid off from your last job and took a step backwards. You don't want to look comfortable in taking a step backwards. You should be out their trying to get something better.

 :curse:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 23, 2014, 11:07:07 AM
No, it does not look bad. You were laid off from your last job and took a step backwards. You don't want to look comfortable in taking a step backwards. You should be out their trying to get something better.

 :curse:
Crap, I rarely screw that up. I must have been thinking about typing something different.
Please forgive me.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on May 23, 2014, 11:26:59 AM
so wacky is really just a telemarketer?   :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on May 23, 2014, 11:49:27 AM
so wacky is really just a telemarketer?   :D
:dubious: :shakesfist:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on May 23, 2014, 12:15:27 PM
We hired a temp in our accounting department. His first day was yesterday, and he wore a full suit. I told him that the dress code was pretty casual, so at lunch he ditched the tie. Today he's wearing a Hurley shirt, cargo shorts and sandals.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 23, 2014, 12:18:43 PM
We hired a temp in our accounting department. His first day was yesterday, and he wore a full suit. I told him that the dress code was pretty casual, so at lunch he ditched the tie. Today he's wearing a Hurley shirt, cargo shorts and sandals.
:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on May 23, 2014, 12:23:03 PM
Granted, a lot of people are wearing shorts today because it's a shortened day before a long weekend, but most of them are trim chino shorts. Not baggy cargo shorts with strings at the bottom.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 23, 2014, 12:34:37 PM
the story was better before you told us everyone else was wearing shorts.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on May 23, 2014, 12:40:13 PM
the story was better before you told us everyone else was wearing shorts.

Welp
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on July 01, 2014, 09:56:55 AM
engineer coworker dude is on hold with a vendor and their hold music is evanescence - bring me to life.

is he on hold with big 12 hq?  how does this happen?  i am absolutely fascinated by this
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on July 01, 2014, 10:15:01 AM
This really proper guy at my office that everyone hates because he has such an incredible vocabulary that it makes them assume he's patronizing him asked me if I use Twitter. I said yes. He mentioned that his son was soon to be the valedictorian of Rockhurst High and some classmates had made a fake twitter account using his son's name and picture. The account featured many tweets regarding hot mothers (he used "cougars" with a  :confused: tone  :lol: ) who he was going to seek out after his speech to make out with in the janitor's closet, etc. Some of them were about professors he regretted not pursuing while he was in school. Anyway, he asked me to locate the account and do my best to get it removed. As I read through the tweets it was so hard not to bust up laughing but couldn't since he was right there. He mentioned that his FBI friend was looking into it but hoped I could help.
If I had twitter his age I would have welcomed this prank with hopes that it would lead to some hot cougar action.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 01, 2014, 01:03:21 PM
Guys the badge reader software thing crashed so now they're asking everyone in the office to reply with the number printed on their badge.  It's a really reply all fiasco. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 08, 2014, 12:28:28 PM
Saw this today...
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/09/uju5epyz.jpg)

Then saw this email from the local prez...

Quote
I know there is lots of curiosity on what happened to the door
 
I would like to tell you all that Donna ****** got caught between the doors “AGAIN”, and this time she used the zucchini to free herself
 
But, nothing more than temperature change and glass with a flaw that caused the glass to burst, much like we see happen in the office once in a while
 
Have a great day, see you at the employee meeting




Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 08, 2014, 12:31:17 PM
Then at the employee meeting the phone used for speaker so people outside the office can call and listen, it was playing hold music because someone had called in and placed the call on hold...so then this email...

Quote
US Montly Meeting - PLEASE TAKE YOUR PHONES OFF HOLD

If you put your phone on hold, nobody on the call can hear.  Please take your phone off hold and mute yourself.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 08, 2014, 12:32:09 PM
Anyway, zucchinis are rough ridin' dangerous I tell ya.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on July 08, 2014, 12:32:50 PM
I'm trying to figure out the role of the zucchini
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on July 08, 2014, 12:36:26 PM
was that a "donna is fat" joke?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on July 08, 2014, 12:37:01 PM
i thought this was the "hilarious" thing in your office thread  :confused:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on July 08, 2014, 12:42:08 PM
gonna have to call in dax on this one
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on July 08, 2014, 12:42:33 PM
summer break time guys. see you in the fall.  :buh-bye:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on July 08, 2014, 12:47:32 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on July 08, 2014, 12:50:25 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on July 08, 2014, 12:54:55 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on July 08, 2014, 01:07:27 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

they must really love where they live 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on July 08, 2014, 01:26:15 PM
Saw this today...
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/09/uju5epyz.jpg)

Then saw this email from the local prez...

Quote
I know there is lots of curiosity on what happened to the door
 
I would like to tell you all that Donna ****** got caught between the doors “AGAIN”, and this time she used the zucchini to free herself
 
But, nothing more than temperature change and glass with a flaw that caused the glass to burst, much like we see happen in the office once in a while
 
Have a great day, see you at the employee meeting


So an employee somehow got stuck between doors, and not for the first time either.  Then she managed to free herself using a vegetable.  Was the zucchini within reach or did she already have it on her in case she got stuck again?  Oh BTW people at this office are somewhat used to glass doors bursting.

So much going on here I don't even know where to start.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on July 08, 2014, 01:33:51 PM
drugs?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on July 08, 2014, 01:34:18 PM
Don't know if it's hilarious, but co-worker snuck into my office while I was doing field work, and got on my computer before it locked--had it lock after 3 minutes if unattended.  He sent an email from my computer to a bunch of women in the office that said "I love you.".  Only found out because they all emailed back that they loved me too.  Bastard.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on July 08, 2014, 01:34:32 PM
Did the zucchini belong to Donna or was it a company zucchini?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on July 08, 2014, 01:37:51 PM
Don't know if it's hilarious, but co-worker snuck into my office while I was doing field work, and got on my computer before it locked--had it lock after 3 minutes if unattended.  He sent an email from my computer to a bunch of women in the office that said "I love you.".  Only found out because they all emailed back that they loved me too.  Bastard.

That's really bizarre.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 08, 2014, 01:43:55 PM
Guys I'm flummoxed here too.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 08, 2014, 01:48:52 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 08, 2014, 01:50:47 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:

lost first place?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 08, 2014, 01:53:56 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:

lost first place?
The two ppl who recruited me here have left in the last two weeks and I surpassed my goal this month, but all of a sudden I've had 3 students who've no showed for their start, their phones are off, and management is asking me how I can get last second students before Thursday? Answer: "I CAN'T! IT'S NOT FAIR TO THEM TO START THIS LATE!" My Answer: "I'll see what I can do!"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The1BigWillie on July 08, 2014, 01:57:22 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:

lost first place?
The two ppl who recruited me here have left in the last two weeks and I surpassed my goal this month, but all of a sudden I've had 3 students who've no showed for their start, their phones are off, and management is asking me how I can get last second students before Thursday? Answer: "I CAN'T! IT'S NOT FAIR TO THEM TO START THIS LATE!" My Answer: "I'll see what I can do!"

It's been my experience that the best sales people bring the most revenue into the company are the ones management picks on and fucks with until they quit or they are fired.  Hang the eff in there bro.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 08, 2014, 01:59:28 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:

lost first place?
The two ppl who recruited me here have left in the last two weeks and I surpassed my goal this month, but all of a sudden I've had 3 students who've no showed for their start, their phones are off, and management is asking me how I can get last second students before Thursday? Answer: "I CAN'T! IT'S NOT FAIR TO THEM TO START THIS LATE!" My Answer: "I'll see what I can do!"

It's been my experience that the best sales people bring the most revenue into the company are the ones management picks on and fucks with until they quit or they are fired.  Hang the eff in there bro.
Very true! They've been hanging on myself and the girl I hated at first (but don't anymore, poor thing had a rough up bringing, I probably judged her too soon).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on July 08, 2014, 02:01:07 PM
I want to burn this place down today. That would be pretty funny to me, I guess?  :dunno:

lost first place?
The two ppl who recruited me here have left in the last two weeks and I surpassed my goal this month, but all of a sudden I've had 3 students who've no showed for their start, their phones are off, and management is asking me how I can get last second students before Thursday? Answer: "I CAN'T! IT'S NOT FAIR TO THEM TO START THIS LATE!" My Answer: "I'll see what I can do!"

Maybe Joffrey will let you have the pick of the dungeons? :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on July 08, 2014, 02:52:09 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

Is the cabin on a lake?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on July 08, 2014, 03:01:12 PM

not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

That's weird, but also strangely common here too.

I know a guy who lives in KC and has another place on a lake Lee's Summit, and know a couple Lawrence/Topeka families that have places on a lake in Mclouth (not far from either city).

Council Grove people do that a lot too.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Cartierfor3 on July 08, 2014, 03:04:32 PM
I'd rather have a lake house at Lake Lotawana than Lake of the Ozarks because driving 3 hours sucks.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on July 08, 2014, 03:07:36 PM

I'd rather have a lake house at Lake Lotawana than Lake of the Ozarks because driving 3 hours sucks.

Says the wuss who doesn't want a kick ass drag boat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on July 08, 2014, 03:08:46 PM

not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

That's weird, but also strangely common here too.

I know a guy who lives in KC and has another place on a lake Lee's Summit, and know a couple Lawrence/Topeka families that have places on a lake in Mclouth (not far from either city).

Council Grove people do that a lot too.

yeah. you're not a "made" mhker until you have a cabin on council grove lake.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Cartierfor3 on July 08, 2014, 03:10:21 PM

I'd rather have a lake house at Lake Lotawana than Lake of the Ozarks because driving 3 hours sucks.

Says the wuss who doesn't want a kick ass drag boat.

As long as we're imagining, I think I'd rather have a beach house than either, but only 17 miles from my regular house, with a really nice ocean view and a wine cellar. Also a mountain view behind the house with wildflower gardens and horses in a stable for riding
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Cartierfor3 on July 08, 2014, 03:14:05 PM
and 2 solariums
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: j-dub on July 08, 2014, 03:19:45 PM
and 2 solariums

quite a find
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on July 08, 2014, 03:26:15 PM
i'm still looking for a beach with quality sand on which to build my beach house
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on July 08, 2014, 03:51:46 PM

not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

That's weird, but also strangely common here too.

I know a guy who lives in KC and has another place on a lake Lee's Summit, and know a couple Lawrence/Topeka families that have places on a lake in Mclouth (not far from either city).

Council Grove people do that a lot too.

Yup, it all involves water though.  No one has a non-lake house 17 miles away.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on July 08, 2014, 03:55:12 PM
i'm still looking for a beach with quality sand on which to build my beach house

the wise man built his house upon the rock

(should have done in poetwarrior font)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on July 08, 2014, 04:01:35 PM
Fixed fortifications stand as a monument to the stupidity of man. 

Keep it mobile, folks.

(http://news.cnet.com/i/bto/20080630/RV_540x320.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on July 08, 2014, 04:32:53 PM

not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

That's weird, but also strangely common here too.

I know a guy who lives in KC and has another place on a lake Lee's Summit, and know a couple Lawrence/Topeka families that have places on a lake in Mclouth (not far from either city).

Council Grove people do that a lot too.

Yup, it all involves water though.  No one has a non-lake house 17 miles away.

My dad has a cabin in the rolling flint Hills about 25 miles from his house.  Thinking about damming the creek and adding a pond tho
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on July 08, 2014, 04:58:37 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

oh its open. Couple groups of family friends are there right now
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on July 08, 2014, 05:04:48 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

oh its open. Couple groups of family friends are there right now

I meant during spring break, sorry.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Benja on July 08, 2014, 05:12:19 PM
not a funny story, but when I lived in Michigan, EVERYONE went on vacation for Spring Break. Somehow every school has the exact same spring break there and everyone like packs the minivan for florida or something. The office was a ghost town during spring break and it was great.

i've heard this exact same thing from other michigan friends. would be funny if you just went north for sb to your weird mackinac island thing

I don't think it's open yet.

Another fun michigan fact: a family we know has a family "cabin" that is 17 miles from their regular house. And they go there to "get away from it all" like 2 weeks a year.

oh its open. Couple groups of family friends are there right now

I meant during spring break, sorry.

I'm Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: cfbandyman on July 21, 2014, 08:41:17 AM
Was in the breakroom this morning.

(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-PqhVU0sioN8/U80WKTgKKII/AAAAAAAABdk/Ua88Nb4JF6E/w511-h681-no/IMG_20140721_081650.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on July 21, 2014, 08:42:12 AM
 :thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 24, 2014, 09:05:05 AM
Manager was in our presidents office this morning and all the girls in my office were huddled up giggling (I'm the only guy today). The next thing I hear is: "Girl let me show you what i'm talking about!" Guess what it was? Yup! It was vibrator talk. They're comparing their vibrators and all the crafty things they do on their phones.  :buh-bye:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 24, 2014, 09:06:11 AM
is it a vibrator app?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 24, 2014, 09:09:08 AM
is it a vibrator app?
There might be one. Not sure. Someone look this up. I'm sure it's a thing. I'm starting to think they don't respect me.  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on July 24, 2014, 09:40:09 AM
Not real sure where to drop this, but I wanted some feedback. 

Apparently my new boss is college buddies with call me wallace...

Now I'm really worried to ge it at work
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on July 25, 2014, 10:25:22 AM
Annual food drive includes a food sculpture contest.
Winner
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/pynypy9u.jpg)

Runner up
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/yhepumu9.jpg)

Other entries
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/y4esasyb.jpg)
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/gypysy4u.jpg)(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/ahy2enes.jpg)


And then this thing.....
(http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/25/ugavyqyr.jpg)



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on July 25, 2014, 10:28:27 AM
lol
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on July 25, 2014, 10:29:19 AM
Put a pak head on that last thing.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on July 25, 2014, 10:30:20 AM
that's great
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on July 27, 2014, 11:37:00 PM
Not real sure where to drop this, but I wanted some feedback. 

Apparently my new boss is college buddies with call me wallace...

Now I'm really worried to ge it at work

is your new boss a gigantic douchebag, i bet they are
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on July 28, 2014, 07:02:55 AM
I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on July 28, 2014, 08:27:20 AM
I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on July 28, 2014, 10:05:19 AM
Not real sure where to drop this, but I wanted some feedback. 

Apparently my new boss is college buddies with call me wallace...

Now I'm really worried to ge it at work



is your new boss a gigantic douchebag, i bet they are

hasn't given me the evidence to justify gigantic, yet.  And has caught me on ge a couple times and hasn't said anything.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on July 28, 2014, 03:59:56 PM
I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Luckily no haha.

In a related story, I'm going through orientation today and the IT lady is showing this and that and using her Outlook as an example. What do I see in her inbox? Some email titled "5 oral sex techniques you've never tried".
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Unruly on July 28, 2014, 04:02:20 PM
Man I want to believe that story.

I truly do.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on July 28, 2014, 04:26:29 PM

I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Luckily no haha.

In a related story, I'm going through orientation today and the IT lady is showing this and that and using her Outlook as an example. What do I see in her inbox? Some email titled "5 oral sex techniques you've never tried".
I would have pointed it out and gave a brief pause before saying, "man, it's amazing the type of spam that gets through." That way, you could gauge her reaction, give her the cop out, but still let her know that you know.

Missed opportunity.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on July 28, 2014, 07:24:57 PM

I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.
I actually think it was spam, but all the same I was just kinda like "an I the only one that sees that?" Haha.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Luckily no haha.

In a related story, I'm going through orientation today and the IT lady is showing this and that and using her Outlook as an example. What do I see in her inbox? Some email titled "5 oral sex techniques you've never tried".
I would have pointed it out and gave a brief pause before saying, "man, it's amazing the type of spam that gets through." That way, you could gauge her reaction, give her the cop out, but still let her know that you know.

Missed opportunity.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on July 28, 2014, 08:07:42 PM


I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.
I actually think it was spam, but all the same I was just kinda like "an I the only one that sees that?" Haha.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Luckily no haha.

In a related story, I'm going through orientation today and the IT lady is showing this and that and using her Outlook as an example. What do I see in her inbox? Some email titled "5 oral sex techniques you've never tried".
I would have pointed it out and gave a brief pause before saying, "man, it's amazing the type of spam that gets through." That way, you could gauge her reaction, give her the cop out, but still let her know that you know.

Missed opportunity.


Gonna win 'em all!
I never comprehend the requote with nothing added. Sometimes I think it's for truth, other times I think it's because dumbass (meaning me in this case). Is that right? If so, which did you mean in this case?


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on July 28, 2014, 08:58:42 PM


I don't think I posted this already, but anyway, I gave notice that I was leaving my company a few weeks ago. A little after I informed them, I got called into one of the owner's offices via phone intercom as sort of an informal exit interview slash "what would it take to to keep you" type meeting. Well about halfway through the meeting, my co worker comes through my boss's phone intercom and says KITNfury's speaker is still on, and then hangs it up. My boss never ended the call. It was a quiet morning in a small office so I imagine everybody heard the convo.
I actually think it was spam, but all the same I was just kinda like "an I the only one that sees that?" Haha.

Were you talking crap on your co-workers?
Luckily no haha.

In a related story, I'm going through orientation today and the IT lady is showing this and that and using her Outlook as an example. What do I see in her inbox? Some email titled "5 oral sex techniques you've never tried".
I would have pointed it out and gave a brief pause before saying, "man, it's amazing the type of spam that gets through." That way, you could gauge her reaction, give her the cop out, but still let her know that you know.

Missed opportunity.


Gonna win 'em all!
I never comprehend the requote with nothing added. Sometimes I think it's for truth, other times I think it's because dumbass (meaning me in this case). Is that right? If so, which did you mean in this case?


Gonna win 'em all!

Look more closely.  It was his mistake, but you just compounded it.  Oh well...

Can't win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on July 28, 2014, 10:12:43 PM
I actually think it was spam, but all the same I was just kinda like "an I the only one that sees that?" Haha.


Sometimes when I post from my phone, it jumps around randomly in a quote. I caught it after I replied but my phone wouldn't let me fix it so I said screw it. Above is what I said,  it's all true btw.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on August 20, 2014, 12:46:12 PM
A guy I work with was dealing with a walk-in lady who wanted to file a complaint, but she was irrational and began yelling for no reason.  The guy put up with it for a couple of minutes, and then said "I don't eat oysters".  The lady stared at him for a minute, and then turned and left, figuring the guy I work with is even nuttier than she is.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on August 20, 2014, 12:47:21 PM
Wild stuff.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 25, 2014, 09:58:33 AM
barfy-not-necessarily-hilarious: I've been out of the office awhile and left a bag of pistachios on my desk. In that time our bldg developed a mouse infestation and i returned to find that they had gone to rough ridin' pound down and my desk was covered in mouse turds :barf:

the guy I share an office with had a mouse turd on his mouse pad!

Also there is a public stack bar area and the mice bypassed the mouse traps and destroyed all the snickers but left all the other snacks and candies alone, so snickers really must be the best snack.

I have located their most likely game trails and emplaced peanut butter baited mousetraps for judging these fools.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 25, 2014, 10:17:05 AM
barfy-not-necessarily-hilarious: I've been out of the office awhile and left a bag of pistachios on my desk. In that time our bldg developed a mouse infestation and i returned to find that they had gone to rough ridin' pound down and my desk was covered in mouse turds :barf:

the guy I share an office with had a mouse turd on his mouse pad!

Also there is a public stack bar area and the mice bypassed the mouse traps and destroyed all the snickers but left all the other snacks and candies alone, so snickers really must be the best snack.

I have located their most likely game trails and emplaced peanut butter baited mousetraps for judging these fools.

Why didn't you put Snickers in the traps?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on August 25, 2014, 10:20:01 AM
barfy-not-necessarily-hilarious: I've been out of the office awhile and left a bag of pistachios on my desk. In that time our bldg developed a mouse infestation and i returned to find that they had gone to rough ridin' pound down and my desk was covered in mouse turds :barf:

the guy I share an office with had a mouse turd on his mouse pad!

Also there is a public stack bar area and the mice bypassed the mouse traps and destroyed all the snickers but left all the other snacks and candies alone, so snickers really must be the best snack.

I have located their most likely game trails and emplaced peanut butter baited mousetraps for judging these fools.

Why didn't you put Snickers in the traps?

I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be able to waste the yummy goodness of snickers. I'd keep eating every piece I tore off to bait the traps.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 25, 2014, 10:23:20 AM
hmm
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on August 25, 2014, 10:37:54 AM
I've been out of the office awhile and left a bag of pistachios on my desk. In that time our bldg developed a mouse infestation

 :Think:

I've concluded that the infestation was caused by the bag of pistachios. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 25, 2014, 11:10:43 AM
hmmmm
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on August 25, 2014, 09:22:08 PM
what kind of mouse?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on August 25, 2014, 10:28:55 PM
There was a bee in my office today.  Several clients were freaking out.  I waited until it landed on my office door and judged it in front of them. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ednksu on August 25, 2014, 10:37:21 PM
There was a bee in my office today.  Several clients were freaking out.  I waited until it landed on my office door and judged it in front of them.

way to destroy agriculture and cause the end of humanity  :bawl: :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 25, 2014, 11:13:59 PM
what kind of mouse?

unknown pending judgement
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on August 26, 2014, 02:32:02 AM
There was a bee in my office today.  Several clients were freaking out.  I waited until it landed on my office door and judged it in front of them.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 26, 2014, 01:52:56 PM
I didn't catch my mouse yet. Big Snickers shill Mrs. Gooch might be on to something despite her motives.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 02:41:04 PM
I have something to share, but it's not hilarious, per se.  It's more along the lines of a I'm Silently Judging You Thread.  Is there some thread for that type of stuff?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Fedor on August 27, 2014, 02:48:28 PM
I have something to share, but it's not hilarious, per se.  It's more along the lines of a I'm Silently Judging You Thread.  Is there some thread for that type of stuff?
That is every thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 03:06:12 PM
I have something to share, but it's not hilarious, per se.  It's more along the lines of a I'm Silently Judging You Thread.  Is there some thread for that type of stuff?
That is every thread.
Specifically office/work related, tho.  Coworker quotes, perhaps?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on August 27, 2014, 03:55:53 PM
Quote and silent don't really compute.
Will it make somebody else laugh because you are silently judging? Maybe through a great pun in and put it in this thread.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:12:26 PM
Quote and silent don't really compute.
Will it make somebody else laugh because you are silently judging? Maybe through a great pun in and put it in this thread.


Gonna win 'em all!

No, it's not really funny.  It's more of a "I'm silently judging you" as a result of a quote, and many folks here either share my sentiment or are guilty of the same behavior.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 04:15:12 PM
MAKE 'EM BEG FOR IT, SPRACNE PIMP
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:17:00 PM
I'm just going to say, it's a good idea to learn the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.  It's 26 words, and you only have to learn it once.  It keeps you from saying stupid things in professional settings and also keeps Spracne from silently judging you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on August 27, 2014, 04:18:58 PM
I'm just going to say, it's a good idea to learn the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.  It's 26 words, and you only have to learn it once.  It keeps you from saying stupid things in professional settings and also keeps Spracne from silently judging you.
P as in penis?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 04:21:47 PM
oh man I have had some phoenetic alphabet snafus of my own!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on August 27, 2014, 04:23:15 PM
Share the anecdote(s). 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:24:54 PM
I'm just going to say, it's a good idea to learn the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.  It's 26 words, and you only have to learn it once.  It keeps you from saying stupid things in professional settings and also keeps Spracne from silently judging you.
P as in penis?

Just saying, it's much better to have a predetermined set of words.  Otherwise, it becomes some type of clinical psychology word association exercise.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 04:25:32 PM
F as in Photo
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on August 27, 2014, 04:25:55 PM
I use the NATO phonetic alphabet like er' day.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:27:32 PM
Truth time: I was inspired to learn the NATO Phonetic Alphabet after viewing a little film called Meet the Parents.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on August 27, 2014, 04:30:10 PM
I did that here and people called me R Lee Ermey.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on August 27, 2014, 04:30:55 PM
Oh man, I was totally making fun, looked it up, and turns out I do use it er' day.  :ROFL:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on August 27, 2014, 04:35:22 PM
Oh man, I was totally making fun, looked it up, and turns out I do use it er' day.  :ROFL:

On a daily basis you're spelling crap for people? 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on August 27, 2014, 04:36:19 PM
Oh man, I was totally making fun, looked it up, and turns out I do use it er' day.  :ROFL:

On a daily basis you're spelling crap for people?

I deal with product model numbers a lot over long distance calls.  So, yeah.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on August 27, 2014, 04:42:21 PM
Why not order on-line?  Then you don't have to talk to anybody. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:42:48 PM
I mean, you don't have to use the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.  The point is to have a pool of 26 non-embarrassing words at your disposal at any given time.  If you want to make your own, that's fine.  But someone else already did it, so...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on August 27, 2014, 04:42:59 PM
Should have gone in coworker quotes thread withan actual quote. This is a rough ridin' disaster.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 04:43:31 PM
were you watching this ben stiller movie in the office, spracs?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 04:44:09 PM
Should have gone in coworker quotes thread withan actual quote. This is a rough ridin' disaster.

I should have gone with my first instinct, which was to create a Silently Judging You thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 04:45:19 PM
"you" being ben stiller, in this case.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on August 27, 2014, 04:50:08 PM
Why not order on-line?  Then you don't have to talk to anybody.

OscarHotel MikeAlphaNovember, India WhiskeyIndiaSierraHotel MikeYankee VictorEchoNovemberDeltaOscarRomeoSierra WhiskeyOscarUniformLimaDelta MikeAlphaKiloEcho TangoHotelAlphaTango PenisOscarSierraSierraIndiaBravoLimaEcho
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on August 27, 2014, 04:56:39 PM
Why not order on-line?  Then you don't have to talk to anybody.

OscarHotel MikeAlphaNovember, India WhiskeyIndiaSierraHotel MikeYankee VictorEchoNovemberDeltaOscarRomeoSierra WhiskeyOscarUniformLimaDelta MikeAlphaKiloEcho TangoHotelAlphaTango PenisOscarSierraSierraIndiaBravoLimaEcho

They must enjoy having people try to spell things to them over the phone and all the hilarity and fuckups that causes. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on August 27, 2014, 04:59:37 PM
Why not order on-line?  Then you don't have to talk to anybody.

OscarHotel MikeAlphaNovember, India WhiskeyIndiaSierraHotel MikeYankee VictorEchoNovemberDeltaOscarRomeoSierra WhiskeyOscarUniformLimaDelta MikeAlphaKiloEcho TangoHotelAlphaTango PenisOscarSierraSierraIndiaBravoLimaEcho

They must enjoy having people try to spell things to them over the phone and all the hilarity and fuckups that causes.

Other than the above post, I don't spell out words or sentences, it is more like ordering a SierraDeltaEcho200895-21Penis, or something, but yeah.  They must love it because their website sucks balls and only has a few of their products.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 27, 2014, 05:34:39 PM
Should have gone in coworker quotes thread withan actual quote. This is a rough ridin' disaster.

I'm glad someone said it, good grief spacne, spit it out
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on August 27, 2014, 05:36:05 PM
hilarious
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on August 27, 2014, 05:54:12 PM
Ok, the relevant snippet of the quote was "L for...Lips, K for............Kiss..."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 05:55:44 PM
Male or female speaker?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 27, 2014, 05:56:20 PM
And who was it talking to. I'm sniffing an EEO complaint
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 27, 2014, 07:21:37 PM
was definitely worth the wait Spracne
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on August 27, 2014, 09:41:03 PM
I watched almost all of the godfather and then right at the end I turned it off and read this thread.  So amaze.  Wow.


Sent using Tapatalk Elite on iPhone 6
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: yoga-like_abana on August 28, 2014, 07:48:20 AM
lady in my office looks like the brunette skinnier version of mimi from the drew carey show
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on August 28, 2014, 08:50:20 AM
lady in my office looks like the brunette skinnier version of mimi from the drew carey show

never seen the show but that lady sounds hilarious, thanks for picking this thread back up by its boot straps
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on September 02, 2014, 09:17:34 AM
well, got that mouse.

but we had a four day weekend, and this mouse probably killed itself on thursday afternoon, so now my office smells like death stench 

:barf:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on September 02, 2014, 01:02:57 PM
They recycled a birthday balloon that they gave to my boss a week ago to me today.  :lol: Eff me!  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on September 02, 2014, 01:12:28 PM
They recycled a birthday balloon that they gave to my boss a week ago to me today.  :lol: Eff me!  :lol:
Sounds made up...no birthday thread for you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on September 02, 2014, 01:15:25 PM
They recycled a birthday balloon that they gave to my boss a week ago to me today.  :lol: Eff me!  :lol:
Sounds made up...no birthday thread for you.
It's not!  :lol: :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on September 02, 2014, 01:19:01 PM
well, got that mouse.

but we had a four day weekend, and this mouse probably killed itself on thursday afternoon, so now my office smells like death stench 

:barf:

I kind of doubt you only had 1 mouse. You probably still have the infestation problem, plus the stink on top of it now.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on September 02, 2014, 01:20:32 PM
well, got that mouse.

but we had a four day weekend, and this mouse probably killed itself on thursday afternoon, so now my office smells like death stench 

:barf:

I kind of doubt you only had 1 mouse. You probably still have the infestation problem, plus the stink on top of it now.

i drenched the surroundings with simple green and set a new trap. i will not become complacent.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Unruly on September 02, 2014, 02:31:56 PM
well, got that mouse.

but we had a four day weekend, and this mouse probably killed itself on thursday afternoon, so now my office smells like death stench 

:barf:

I kind of doubt you only had 1 mouse. You probably still have the infestation problem, plus the stink on top of it now.

i drenched the surroundings with simple green and set a new trap. i will not become complacent.

Your office has an uhhhhh "unique" view of what is hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on September 02, 2014, 09:55:53 PM
Two female co-workers were going to workout but they only had an hour before their carpool was leaving, so they came in my office to talk and eat some leftover birthday cake before they squeezed an hour workout in to 15 minutes while the carpool buddies milled around outside their "rally point" near my office door.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CrushNasty on September 03, 2014, 09:13:31 PM
Two female co-workers were going to workout but they only had an hour before their carpool was leaving, so they came in my office to talk and eat some leftover birthday cake before they squeezed an hour workout in to 15 minutes while the carpool buddies milled around outside their "rally point" near my office door.

Sounds made up....no birthday thread for you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on October 30, 2014, 08:45:46 AM
(http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/14/10/30/e2879dd2e41519ff42fe77bc61a57edc.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on October 30, 2014, 09:14:20 AM
a true company man
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on October 30, 2014, 09:17:54 AM
Two nights in a row someone has taken a huge dump and intentionally blocked the motion sensor for the flush.  I suspect it's the IT guy we are laying off tomorrow but I'm not sure.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on October 30, 2014, 09:21:26 AM
IT guy is pushing hard for his own office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on October 30, 2014, 09:21:38 AM
#fiber
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 30, 2014, 09:35:51 AM
That's disgusting. It nerds are disgusting
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on October 30, 2014, 09:36:06 AM
Two nights in a row someone has taken a huge dump and intentionally blocked the motion sensor for the flush.  I suspect it's the IT guy we are laying off tomorrow but I'm not sure.

sounds like a data dump
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on October 30, 2014, 09:36:52 AM
That's disgusting. It nerds are disgusting

+1
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 30, 2014, 10:33:44 AM
(http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/14/10/30/e2879dd2e41519ff42fe77bc61a57edc.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

My french canadian coworker wears that every day. (Not w/ our company logo, of course)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 30, 2014, 10:38:07 AM
Also, I work with a bunch of dweebs that come in at like 7:15 and I usually come in at 8-8:30.

If I ever come in early they make a comment or look at their watch and I don't like it. :don'tcare:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on October 30, 2014, 11:17:03 AM
I am going home sick today.  (will also post justification in the sick thread)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on October 30, 2014, 11:34:16 AM
I am going home sick today.  (will also post justification in the sick thread)
Hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on October 30, 2014, 12:47:37 PM

I am going home sick today.  (will also post justification in the sick thread)
Hilarious.

You said it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: BRULL on October 30, 2014, 12:51:38 PM
(http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/14/10/30/e2879dd2e41519ff42fe77bc61a57edc.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

My french canadian coworker wears that every day. (Not w/ our company logo, of course)

Escalators and shoe laces are a deadly combo.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 30, 2014, 01:02:26 PM
I'm really surprised the guy wasn't wearing the velcro buckle shoes
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on October 30, 2014, 01:44:41 PM
His ass looks fabulous.  Probably all that biking.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chunkles on November 03, 2014, 08:26:34 PM
so the guy who sits next to me very nonchalantly says "huh, there's a naked dude on the phone in that apartment over there."  We all had a good laugh about this guy who prolly got more work stuff done on that phone convo than most of our office.   I think the attached pic is too blurry to be nsfw.

Apparently at that same apartment a few years back, a different tenant lived there.  With his woman-friend. On a Wednesday afternoon, she was [family-blog]ing him a [family-blog] at that same window.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 03, 2014, 08:30:50 PM

His ass looks fabulous.  Probably all that biking.


Sent using Tapatalk Elite on iPhone 6
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on November 05, 2014, 08:40:57 AM
Quote
The Eurovision Song Contest 2015 voting for Switzerland is open to all. Please click on the link and cast your 4 votes for "Dr. Condor"!

http://esc.srf.ch/en-ch/thierry-condor (http://esc.srf.ch/en-ch/thierry-condor)

blasted this one in a company-wide email :love:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slucat on November 18, 2014, 10:43:37 AM
Two guys roughly in their 60's are in the cubical across from me, discussing the finer points of the south park classic "Cartman's Mom is a bitch"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: cfbandyman on November 18, 2014, 02:47:28 PM
This for real email we received.  :love:

(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-iYfGOAzUFIY/VGolk9zfgfI/AAAAAAAACOU/trpYQ20DovA/w471-h728-no/amazing.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on November 18, 2014, 03:31:43 PM
I find office speedworkers hilarious. Also terrifying. What If I'm just walking around a corner with a fresh cup of joe, and all of a sudden get trucksticked by a speedwalker?

Them:  :cheese: --> Me: :users: --> Them:  :sdeek: --> Me:  :curse:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 18, 2014, 03:35:48 PM
I'm a huge speedwalker at work. I like to look busy and also get back to my desk to BBS ASAP!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on November 18, 2014, 03:38:32 PM
I'm a huge speedwalker at work. I like to look busy and also get back to my desk to BBS ASAP!

I walk briskly at work as well. I'm talking about the people who take like 15 minutes every 2 hours to powerwalk laps around the building for exercise.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on November 18, 2014, 03:40:13 PM
I'm a big fan of walking fast, but this practice ethically requires that you are also very aware of your surroundings and cognizant of blind corners/footpath intersections.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 18, 2014, 03:41:40 PM
True! Sometimes I catch myself saying: "CORNER!" like in the restaurant biz. Also, that's weird that ppl are trying to exercise at work. #weirdos
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on November 18, 2014, 03:47:59 PM
Also, that's weird that ppl are trying to exercise at work. #weirdos

Zero percent chance that they are attractive people.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 18, 2014, 03:48:40 PM
Also, that's weird that ppl are trying to exercise at work. #weirdos

Zero percent chance that they are attractive people.
100% they're smelly.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on November 18, 2014, 03:48:53 PM
Just realized the website in WC08's avi turns into a hyperlink on my work computer.  :lol:

This could spell trouble if my computer is lagging some day and I make a misplaced click  :Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 18, 2014, 03:51:33 PM
 :surprised:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on November 18, 2014, 04:48:05 PM
Just realized the website in WC08's avi turns into a hyperlink on my work computer.  :lol:

This could spell trouble if my computer is lagging some day and I make a misplaced click  :Wha:

Hey everybody! Get in here and laugh at this guy for not knowing the difference between an avatar and a signature! :lol:

It does it for me too, tho  :ohno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on November 18, 2014, 04:48:51 PM
You knew what I meant  :curse:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 18, 2014, 04:50:16 PM
Sorry guys.  :blush:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: UCHADBRO on November 18, 2014, 05:59:13 PM
I'm an administrator for my company's CRM system. Anyway, I got a call today about parts of a persons screen turning purple. I had them send me a screenshot. The things that turned purple were links they had clicked on.... :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on November 18, 2014, 06:25:43 PM
This person in my office is doing a "pay it forward" thing.  So today they posted $1.00 on the pop machine at work that costs $1.50.  Was pretty funny to me.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 08:19:31 AM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on November 19, 2014, 11:46:01 AM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system. 

I would have responded with, "Well, that is just inaccurate.".
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 12:08:05 PM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system. 

I would have responded with, "Well, that is just inaccurate.".

I've got to be better, you're right Thundarr.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on November 19, 2014, 12:23:26 PM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system. 

I would have responded with, "Well, that is just inaccurate.".

I've got to be better, you're right Thundarr.

By and large, get a little better every day.  Help the youngsters...etc.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 19, 2014, 12:56:22 PM
in a meeting today a guy tried to make a B2tF time travel joke and said "I dont have a dorian"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on November 19, 2014, 03:16:37 PM
I just recently made such a joke, but got it right.  It was about a guy that wanted his time served credit adjusted, but now he's already out. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 19, 2014, 08:04:18 PM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system.

Do you work in insurance?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 10:28:49 PM
Well now I'm scared mocat...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 10:30:56 PM
Are you going to get me fired?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kim carnes on November 19, 2014, 10:36:16 PM
my boss, previous roomate of CALL ME WALLACE, said that Angel got lucky hitting the game winner and would've never worked in Weber's system.

Do you work in insurance?

One thing is for sure, Rick rampus is a real life loser (sorry Rick)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 10:45:23 PM
Gee wilikers,  out of all the people on this board, I sure figured kc was on my side.  Darnit
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kim carnes on November 19, 2014, 10:52:44 PM
Gee wilikers,  out of all the people on this board, I sure figured kc was on my side.  Darnit

i didn't say i didn't like you
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 19, 2014, 11:02:46 PM
Why would you like a real life loser kc?  I don't see any love lost between you and wacky...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 19, 2014, 11:42:16 PM
Why would you like a real life loser kc?  I don't see any love lost between you and wacky...
Get lost, obsessed loser!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 20, 2014, 05:44:45 AM
Why would you like a real life loser kc?  I don't see any love lost between you and wacky...
Get lost, obsessed loser!
:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on November 20, 2014, 10:28:36 AM
Why would you like a real life loser kc?  I don't see any love lost between you and wacky...
Get lost, obsessed loser!

quit following me around, dork
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2014, 10:44:49 AM
Well now I'm scared mocat...

 :Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2014, 10:50:41 AM
Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 20, 2014, 07:32:13 PM
Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?

mocat is ricks boss  :surprised:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mhkpasa on November 21, 2014, 07:58:11 AM
 :ohno: Rampus! :ohno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on December 09, 2014, 12:20:48 PM
Email sent to all men in company this morning.

Quote
Booger problem in men's restroom

Guys,

We have a problem with folks picking their nose while using the facility and wiping the boogers on the tile above the urinals in the men’s restrooms.  Kleenex works well for this issue.  Every month the facilities guys clean/remove the boogers when they do their regular scheduled rest room check.  I’m sorry for this ridiculous mass email but this activity needs to stop. We would appreciate your cooperation with this matter.  Have a good day. Thank You.  

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on December 09, 2014, 12:33:02 PM
Email sent to all men in company this morning.

Quote
Booger problem in men's restroom

Guys,

We have a problem with folks picking their nose while using the facility and wiping the boogers on the tile above the urinals in the men’s restrooms.  Kleenex works well for this issue.  Every month the facilities guys clean/remove the boogers when they do their regular scheduled rest room check.  I’m sorry for this ridiculous mass email but this activity needs to stop. We would appreciate your cooperation with this matter.  Have a good day. Thank You. 


Where do you work?  Gross Toddler inc.?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KITNfury on December 09, 2014, 12:58:12 PM
Email sent to all men in company this morning.

Quote
Booger problem in men's restroom

Guys,

We have a problem with folks picking their nose while using the facility and wiping the boogers on the tile above the urinals in the men’s restrooms.  Kleenex works well for this issue.  Every month the facilities guys clean/remove the boogers when they do their regular scheduled rest room check.  I’m sorry for this ridiculous mass email but this activity needs to stop. We would appreciate your cooperation with this matter.  Have a good day. Thank You. 


Where do you work?  Gross Toddler inc.?
Apparently I do. I've never noticed any myself, so I guess kudos to the facilities guys for keeping it clean. I'm betting its like one guy. I bet he's beaming with pride today.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on December 09, 2014, 01:06:30 PM
Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?

 :impatient:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on December 09, 2014, 01:48:26 PM
Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?

 :impatient:
this really needs to be answered
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on December 09, 2014, 02:05:58 PM
post the answer, rick
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on December 09, 2014, 02:06:58 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/1X2RKsa.png)

:dubious:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 12, 2014, 04:55:54 PM
Went to the conference room to see that Twilight: Breaking Dawn is playing on the TV.

It's the wedding scene!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on December 12, 2014, 05:20:12 PM
Went to the conference room to see that Twilight: Breaking Dawn is playing on the TV.

It's the wedding scene!
I'm not coming now.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 12, 2014, 05:36:16 PM
Your office really needs to get it together
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on December 12, 2014, 09:07:20 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on December 12, 2014, 09:18:28 PM
:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on December 15, 2014, 10:04:17 AM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on December 16, 2014, 10:43:49 AM
Your office really needs to get it together

that wiring qualifies as a "hilarious thing at your office"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: powercat_62 on December 16, 2014, 11:57:19 AM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mr Bread on December 16, 2014, 12:00:44 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on December 16, 2014, 12:06:24 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on December 16, 2014, 12:09:06 PM
crap just got real


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on December 16, 2014, 12:09:38 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

:sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on December 16, 2014, 12:11:41 PM
I wonder if mocat was my boss now.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: powercat_62 on December 16, 2014, 12:19:49 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack

I should mention, the HR lady is the owner's niece, so nobody calls her out on these types of things.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on December 16, 2014, 12:20:39 PM
"Hey boss, would you say you spend more than or less than 4 hours a day bbs'n?"


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on December 16, 2014, 12:21:51 PM
pcat62, get over your engineer self. Make the damn Christmas video and post it here.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 16, 2014, 12:23:37 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack

I should mention, the HR lady is the owner's niece, so nobody calls her out on these types of things.

ugh, small businesses are the absolute worst
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 16, 2014, 12:27:09 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack

I should mention, the HR lady is the owner's niece, so nobody calls her out on these types of things.

Is the owner going to be singing in the video? If so, then you better do it too.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on December 16, 2014, 12:34:17 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 16, 2014, 12:45:36 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?

i'll answer that. he's male. let's keep this story moving and see where it goes.  :excited:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mhkpasa on December 16, 2014, 12:48:48 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?
:excited: :horrorsurprise: :ohno: :popcorn:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on December 16, 2014, 01:06:42 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?

i'll answer that. he's male. let's keep this story moving and see where it goes.  :excited:
I could describe him for you Mocat. I think i remember what he looks like from KU tailgate pak a few years ago.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: RickRampus on December 16, 2014, 04:01:11 PM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?

i'll answer that. he's male. let's keep this story moving and see where it goes.  :excited:
I could describe him for you Mocat. I think i remember what he looks like from KU tailgate pak a few years ago.
Pak'd is what I looked like.  A masculine Pak'd if that answers any more questions. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on December 16, 2014, 04:27:16 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack

I should mention, the HR lady is the owner's niece, so nobody calls her out on these types of things.

That HR lady sounds pretty great. She will probably move on to something better soon.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: lopakman on December 16, 2014, 04:48:59 PM
This threads still going?   :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on December 16, 2014, 04:52:15 PM
EMAW co-worker recorded himself whistling Christmas carols, burned it to a CD, and swapped it in a white elephant gift exchange.  Even 'shopped an awesome cover for the CD.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 16, 2014, 05:00:13 PM
Email from HR Lady

Quote
Tomorrow I’ll be going through the office trying to record each of us singing part of the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” to do a mashup similar to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeaehxEdpgo) for our annual holiday card.  Obviously, it won’t be nearly as funny as Captain Piccard, but I think it will be more entertaining and personal than just a fancy photo of the garland, ribbon, and lights in my house (which was last year’s card, although I did receive several compliments on the pretty picture).  AND I’m envisioning this being a representation of (company name)’s “fun” side so feel free to bring out your Christmas sweaters and ham it up.

People are not happy.  The admin people already put on a real shitty Christmas party (sing along at Alamo Drafthouse), and now this.  We are engineers, not the cast of Glee.

What kind of company sends out a Christmas card with a picture of some crap a random lady that works there had in her house?  Also, pull your balls out of your zipper hole to really up your ham factor.  #lifehack

I should mention, the HR lady is the owner's niece, so nobody calls her out on these types of things.

ugh, small businesses are the absolute worst

I don't think the size of the business is the issue.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 16, 2014, 05:12:41 PM
EMAW co-worker recorded himself whistling Christmas carols, burned it to a CD, and swapped it in a white elephant gift exchange.  Even 'shopped an awesome cover for the CD.

that's fantastic
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on December 16, 2014, 06:13:28 PM

EMAW co-worker recorded himself whistling Christmas carols, burned it to a CD, and swapped it in a white elephant gift exchange.  Even 'shopped an awesome cover for the CD.

that's fantastic
Probably the best white elephant gift I have ever heard of.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on December 17, 2014, 08:39:44 AM
last year i got a boston red sox beanie for white elephant. this year i am giving that same boston red sox beanie.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on December 17, 2014, 09:39:16 AM
Reply to my pm mother trucker.

my answer is i doubt it, but if you would answer my GD question we would know for sure

Well now I'm scared mocat...

did your boss get married this year?
Yes Mr mocat

RickRampus are you male or female?

i'll answer that. he's male. let's keep this story moving and see where it goes.  :excited:
I could describe him for you Mocat. I think i remember what he looks like from KU tailgate pak a few years ago.
Pak'd is what I looked like.  A masculine Pak'd if that answers any more questions.

yeah, i have no idea who you are. but i know your boss
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on December 17, 2014, 01:35:01 PM
:sadtrombone:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on December 17, 2014, 01:43:08 PM
Hey @XocolateThundarr did your boss get married this year?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on December 17, 2014, 02:02:14 PM
Hey @XocolateThundarr did your boss get married this year?


(http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/3515277/uh-no-o.gif)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on December 17, 2014, 02:49:46 PM

EMAW co-worker recorded himself whistling Christmas carols, burned it to a CD, and swapped it in a white elephant gift exchange.  Even 'shopped an awesome cover for the CD.

that's fantastic
Probably the best white elephant gift I have ever heard of.


Gonna win 'em all!

A dvd compilation might push it over the top.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Shooter Jones on December 30, 2014, 01:14:12 PM
we now have a few of these randomly in the office now.

(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/318x-sptAJL.jpg)

innocent woman took a disk to the face earlier. not sure if hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on December 30, 2014, 04:10:26 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWmeister on December 30, 2014, 04:32:38 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."

I would IRL "hur hur hurrrrr" them.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on December 30, 2014, 07:43:40 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."

I'm totally using this tomorrow.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: IPA4Me on December 30, 2014, 08:43:35 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."
So glad I'm off this week. I hate that nonsense.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on December 31, 2014, 06:27:49 AM
we now have a few of these randomly in the office now.

(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/318x-sptAJL.jpg)

innocent woman took a disk to the face earlier. not sure if hilarious.

The disc golf baskets in the office are fantastic, but not hilarious.  The reaction of the woman taking a disc to the face would determine its hilarity.   BTW, I now want disc golf baskets in my office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on December 31, 2014, 12:16:24 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."

I'm totally using this tomorrow.

JUST DROPPED IT ON SOME GAL, SHE LOVED IT.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on December 31, 2014, 02:07:53 PM
You know what isn't hilarious? People ending every phone call with "talk to you next year."

I'm totally using this tomorrow.

JUST DROPPED IT ON SOME GAL, SHE LOVED IT.

twice today. people LOVE it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on January 07, 2015, 10:50:07 AM
This is on the bathroom counter:
(http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/15/01/07/b017bbfbb235d416ed53eecd8c3c6514.jpg)


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on January 07, 2015, 01:24:12 PM
This is on the bathroom counter:
(http://tapatalk.imageshack.com/v2/15/01/07/b017bbfbb235d416ed53eecd8c3c6514.jpg)


Gonna win 'em all!

I'll bet it smells fantastic on you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Fldermaus on January 20, 2015, 11:30:59 AM
Just got an email [sent to all employees] from our accounting office that said:

"$53,398.63 ck from ----  Please confirm if you have seen this check..."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on January 21, 2015, 09:24:28 AM
Just got an email [sent to all employees] from our accounting office that said:

"$53,398.63 ck from ----  Please confirm if you have seen this check..."

Sounds like someone is having a very unhilarious time at the office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 21, 2015, 09:25:11 AM
accounting 101: when in doubt, shred
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KSUblumpkin on January 21, 2015, 02:08:57 PM
Man I need to post more.  This stuff is gold.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Shooter Jones on January 21, 2015, 02:40:20 PM
there are 4 random CD's on the table in the break room with a huge FREE sign in front of them.

CD's are:
Damien Marley
Boys For Pele
Flyleaf
12 Gracious Melodies
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on January 21, 2015, 02:45:15 PM
Dibs on 12 Gracious Melodies.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on January 21, 2015, 02:46:08 PM
there are 4 random CD's on the table in the break room with a huge FREE sign in front of them.

CD's are:
Damien Marley
Boys For Pele
Flyleaf
12 Gracious Melodies
oh man, somebody either got left last night or this is a sign for help.  you should investigate.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on January 27, 2015, 07:06:10 AM
There's a new guy at my office whose last name is Scharding. We were trying to locate him in one of our systems, and he pointed at the list of names on the screen and said: "That one. I'm Scharding."

Maybe not quite "hilarious," but it was a nice little afternoon pick-me-up.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on January 27, 2015, 08:51:07 AM
There's a new guy at my office whose last name is Scharding. We were trying to locate him in one of our systems, and he pointed at the list of names on the screen and said: "That one. I'm Scharding."

Maybe not quite "hilarious," but it was a nice little afternoon pick-me-up.
It's closer to hilarious than most of the boring garbage in this thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on January 27, 2015, 11:42:03 AM
Found in the parking lot by a co-worker.

(https://scontent-a-atl.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/10953399_10206185856074006_8959072794781443453_n.jpg?oh=2844b8cf460e76e68e8981a5b7fe295a&oe=5553EFDB)

Not really hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on January 27, 2015, 12:38:14 PM
well, the fact that they do have a hotline kinda is.

"earl, get over here- we have to burn this cross and we have to burn it quick, now i said get over here!"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: TheCatFanSpeaks on January 27, 2015, 02:02:20 PM
that url. lol.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on January 28, 2015, 09:39:56 AM
Some people at my office thought this was hilarious, but not me. We did a "team building" thing recently and part of it was doing a personality test; the one where you get the 4-letter personality code thing.  Well, I had the same 4-letters as the office weird guy that everyone is weirded out by.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on January 28, 2015, 09:50:39 AM
Some people at my office thought this was hilarious, but not me. We did a "team building" thing recently and part of it was doing a personality test; the one where you get the 4-letter personality code thing.  Well, I had the same 4-letters as the office weird guy that everyone is weirded out by.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CopperBowl on January 28, 2015, 10:04:14 AM
Some people at my office thought this was hilarious, but not me. We did a "team building" thing recently and part of it was doing a personality test; the one where you get the 4-letter personality code thing.  Well, I had the same 4-letters as the office weird guy that everyone is weirded out by.

 :lol:

What a bunch of DICS  :curse:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Pete on January 30, 2015, 07:26:25 PM

Some people at my office thought this was hilarious, but not me. We did a "team building" thing recently and part of it was doing a personality test; the one where you get the 4-letter personality code thing.  Well, I had the same 4-letters as the office weird guy that everyone is weirded out by.


TELL US YOUR MEYERS-BRIGGS TYPE!!!!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Stevesie60 on January 31, 2015, 06:26:56 PM

Some people at my office thought this was hilarious, but not me. We did a "team building" thing recently and part of it was doing a personality test; the one where you get the 4-letter personality code thing.  Well, I had the same 4-letters as the office weird guy that everyone is weirded out by.


TELL US YOUR MEYERS-BRIGGS TYPE!!!!

Oooohhh, this could be a fun thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on January 31, 2015, 08:32:07 PM
intp
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: jmlynch1 on January 31, 2015, 10:25:42 PM
intp
INFJ but ambivalently ENFJ
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on February 11, 2015, 01:11:26 PM
So today, a coworker who no one really likes because she is a "know it all" and never stops talking, came to my cube to talk about a matter. I'm pretty point blake and told her my thoughts on the matter, which was actually in her favor. However, she found the need to blabber on 10 minutes more, after I had made the decision for her, just to remind me her thoughts on the issue. I mean, it didn't stop and I just gave her this student. Why were we still talking about it?

Anyways, My sweet coworker (mid 50's, church goer, etc.) does one of the most uncharacteristic, but awesome things for me. She called my cell phone (Where finally my coworker walked away) and said: "Hey! I'm your dr.s appt reminder. I could tell you were over talking to her. You're welcome!".  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on February 11, 2015, 01:16:55 PM
So today, a coworker who no one really likes because she is a "know it all" and never stops talking, came to my cube to talk about a matter. I'm pretty point blake and told her my thoughts on the matter, which was actually in her favor. However, she found the need to blabber on 10 minutes more, after I had made the decision for her, just to remind me her thoughts on the issue. I mean, it didn't stop and I just gave her this student. Why were we still talking about it?

Anyways, My sweet coworker (mid 50's, church goer, etc.) does one of the most uncharacteristic, but awesome things for me. She called my cell phone (Where finally my coworker walked away) and said: "Hey! I'm your dr.s appt reminder. I could tell you were over talking to her. You're welcome!".  :lol:

:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: meow meow on February 11, 2015, 01:46:04 PM
Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Muldoon on February 12, 2015, 09:05:56 PM
From time to time there is a strong smell of Christmas tree that floats over the cubicle wall. Turns out the old dude a couple cubes down sprays it whenever he farts.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on February 12, 2015, 09:08:56 PM
this was really good until the last 5 words
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on March 04, 2015, 03:57:52 PM
just started AND ended an email with "thanks". haah!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on March 14, 2015, 10:50:40 PM
this week, a coworker invited me to watch him do an mma fight at the mhk hilton on the 20th (i think was the date)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SdK on March 15, 2015, 10:52:00 AM
this week, a coworker invited me to watch him do an mma fight at the mhk hilton on the 20th (i think was the date)
Your guy should fight my guy.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 27, 2015, 06:03:45 PM
Not hilarious, but amusing story that happened today:

I was on a conference call with a lot of people I didn't know today, I chimed in and this guy was being pretty belligerent and questioning me like I didn't have any idea what I was talking about. I in turn got pretty belligerent and used lots of facts to show that THEY didn't know what they were talking about. It was a lot of fun, really.

Since I didn't know who I was arguing with, I asked who it was after the meeting. Turns out I got into a shouting match with someone at my boss's boss's boss's level. :cool:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on March 27, 2015, 06:05:16 PM
How many layers of management does your company have?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 27, 2015, 06:09:53 PM
How many layers of management does your company have?
Tons. There's like three below me and five above.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on March 27, 2015, 06:30:29 PM
Power respek power
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on March 27, 2015, 06:32:36 PM
STUD!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on March 27, 2015, 06:35:44 PM
that wasnt very hilarious mich, seems like it should have gone here instead http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=26706.0
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: brandochav on March 27, 2015, 06:49:07 PM
How many layers of management does your company have?
Tons. There's like three below me and five above.


Sounds like your company is in need of the Bobs.

(http://www.quickmeme.com/img/95/956becc8bbd44b1f916d0229c7816debd9a38aed07e1e1f2e25773c83d56338e.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 27, 2015, 07:07:27 PM
We could probably use the Bobs, although we do have like thousands of employees.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on March 27, 2015, 08:21:46 PM
We could probably use the Bobs, although we do have like thousands of employees.

Corporate America is quite entertaining.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: BackPayne on March 27, 2015, 08:39:23 PM
A 7 year old boy wiped crap on the front of my desk.  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on March 27, 2015, 08:51:46 PM
Rusty you totally silverbacked that guy.

(Pretty sure that's the correct usage of that word   :D)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 27, 2015, 10:38:46 PM
I dialed into a call just today and heard this for the first time ever:

https://youtu.be/zh9h4KZpnJU
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 27, 2015, 10:46:07 PM
I dialed into a call just today and heard this for the first time ever:

https://youtu.be/zh9h4KZpnJU
I wonder what kind of royalties that guy gets
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on March 27, 2015, 10:52:14 PM
I dialed into a call just today and heard this for the first time ever:

https://youtu.be/zh9h4KZpnJU
I wonder what kind of royalties that guy gets

It seems like he wrote it as part of his job at uberconference. So, he gets nothing, I guess.

http://blog.alexcornell.com/rethinking-hold-music
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on March 27, 2015, 10:56:26 PM
I dialed into a call just today and heard this for the first time ever:

https://youtu.be/zh9h4KZpnJU
I wonder what kind of royalties that guy gets

It seems like he wrote it as part of his job at uberconference. So, he gets nothing, I guess.

http://blog.alexcornell.com/rethinking-hold-music

wow
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on May 15, 2015, 03:19:34 PM
Serious, unironic discussion right now of a rumored double rainbow sighting.

"I heard there was a double rainbow this morning."
"Did you see it?"
"No. Tom said he did."
"I thought I saw something that might have been a double rainbow."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on May 15, 2015, 06:39:27 PM
I dialed into a call just today and heard this for the first time ever:

https://youtu.be/zh9h4KZpnJU

That's one of the worst things in the whole world.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 15, 2015, 07:15:47 PM
So the power went out today and the toilets are all automatic flushers.  There is a button you can push on it to flush but it won't auto flush with no electricity.  So one of the secretaries is pooping when the power goes out and then refuses to leave the bathroom with the turd floating in the single room bathroom and instead cracks the door open and starts asking for advice about what to do from the adjacent offices.  One idea submitted was for her to fill up a trash can with water and try to "force flush it."  I helpfully explained that wouldn't work and asked if she had hit the button.  I feel bad for the humiliated old ass secretary, but boy oh boy the other secretaries were either trolling or completely unhelpful. 

Do not go to battle with the secretaries.  They are ready to frag you when you are taking fire.
#war #analogy #foxhole
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 15, 2015, 07:39:38 PM
who poops without a cell in 2015?  what a dumbass
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 15, 2015, 07:46:45 PM
old people smdh
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on May 15, 2015, 07:49:36 PM
pushing the button sounds easier and cleaner, but the trashcan full of water should work too.  why wouldn't it work, kk?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 15, 2015, 11:12:05 PM
pushing the button sounds easier and cleaner, but the trashcan full of water should work too.  why wouldn't it work, kk?

Because the water will overflow?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SdK on May 15, 2015, 11:22:56 PM
lpiq :rofl:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 15, 2015, 11:24:03 PM
a hundred little cups?  yeah.  but not a big trash can full at once
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on May 15, 2015, 11:38:06 PM
Because the water will overflow?

get a bucket and your kid and go teach him how toilets work.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 15, 2015, 11:45:08 PM
sometimes these things just don't work out, kat kid
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Stevesie60 on May 18, 2015, 01:22:48 AM
How is telling everyone in the office, from the bathroom, that you need advice on how to flush your turd down, less embarrassing than leaving a turd there?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 18, 2015, 09:07:17 AM
How is telling everyone in the office, from the bathroom, that you need advice on how to flush your turd down, less embarrassing than leaving a turd there?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 18, 2015, 09:18:38 AM
Maybe the hilarious thing was me and my (mis)understanding of toliets? 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on May 18, 2015, 01:51:34 PM
Maybe the hilarious thing was me and my (mis)understanding of toliets?


Sounds like it belongs in the Shame thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: nicname on May 27, 2015, 10:42:15 AM
Have to drop a deuce at work. All is going well. I'm checking tweets,  :lol: at Vines, etc. when someone walks in. Ugh, party over. It's boss (talks to himself, can hear his voice). Boss sits down at stall right next to mine. I'm frantically cutting my deuce aka relaxation time short. Here's the kicker. As boss lets out disgusting slimy fart/crap he takes LARGE inhale followed by an "ahhhh."

No one can see me, but I'm visibly shaken. I quickly get sorted and get out of there as fast as I can.

Not really hilarious. WTF?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on May 27, 2015, 03:57:06 PM
How is telling everyone in the office, from the bathroom, that you need advice on how to flush your turd down, less embarrassing than leaving a turd there?

Ninja poop, she should have "never" been there.  Secretary used poor strategy.  It's not your poop if you don't own up to it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on May 27, 2015, 04:00:22 PM
A shrewd poop move would be to walk out of the bathroom and say, "Someone left a surprise for me in the bathroom, and it won't flush.  Smells like absolute crap, too."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Trogdor on May 27, 2015, 07:14:11 PM
A shrewd poop move would be to walk out of the bathroom and say, "Someone left a surprise for me in the bathroom, and it won't flush.  Smells like absolute crap, too."

I would hope that it is actually crap and not some sketchy smell
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 29, 2015, 11:53:12 AM
This medium size brown recluse is on the wall behind the toilet right now. Watch out everybody.

(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/05/29/2fd05802727d0d0112279d18e2d76dc7.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 29, 2015, 11:54:10 AM
where's a sinkhole when you need it?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on May 29, 2015, 11:58:03 AM
Are you sure it's not one of those Ragamuffin Hobo "Speders"?

(http://cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/image_content_width/hash/8a/3b/8a3b06312d4c35bed516936cb85c0833.jpg?itok=dqh199Iw)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on May 29, 2015, 11:59:05 AM
 :facepalm: <-- Male Mouse Spider
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on May 29, 2015, 11:59:53 AM
i'm sure. zoom in on that fiddle, pardner
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on May 29, 2015, 12:00:39 PM
i'm sure. zoom in on that fiddle, pardner

I diddle diddled...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 29, 2015, 12:05:01 PM
This medium size brown recluse is on the wall behind the toilet right now. Watch out everybody.

(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/05/29/2fd05802727d0d0112279d18e2d76dc7.jpg)

Not hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WildcatNkilt on May 29, 2015, 01:09:12 PM
eff that.  Burn your office down.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on May 29, 2015, 01:11:11 PM
we have a spiders thread started just because of brown recluses in the office!

http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21197.150 (http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21197.150)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on June 02, 2015, 02:26:17 PM
a guy just called me from the parking lot all excited because there was a beaver in the parking lot hiding under a car
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on June 02, 2015, 02:26:42 PM
turns out it was just a groundhog lol
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Shooter Jones on June 02, 2015, 02:32:23 PM
turns out it was just a groundhog lol

:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on June 02, 2015, 02:33:50 PM
turns out it was just a groundhog lol

:lol:

Was the guy Wacky? He seems to have issues identifying animals.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 02, 2015, 02:36:50 PM
 :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on June 02, 2015, 02:39:33 PM
Happened to me once, but it turned out to be just some Scott City highschool kid hiding from the constable. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 02, 2015, 02:41:55 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on June 04, 2015, 01:02:26 PM
I just watched someone try to stretch-wrap a pallet with the pallet jack still under it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on June 04, 2015, 01:31:01 PM
Just watched someone litter in the parking lot (conference room has a big window toward the parking lot) and their boss call them on it in front of half the office.  Wow!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on June 04, 2015, 05:39:11 PM
i was in one of our break room kitchens yesterday to wash my coffee mug and an older co-worker lady is doing the same. she is taking a while and she turns and says "sorry I'm almost done" to which I just said "no don't worry about it your fine".

without missing a beat she says "that's what I've been told" and just smiles. I had no response and just kind of laughed it off and she walked away  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 04, 2015, 05:42:44 PM
Someone wants to go to bang town USA ala big train!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on June 04, 2015, 06:01:49 PM
We have a bar type ice machine and every Friday at 430 one of my coworkers fills up a trash bag with ice
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on June 04, 2015, 06:04:08 PM
stud things
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Saulbadguy on June 04, 2015, 08:57:33 PM
Foreigners. Love them, they are adorable.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 29, 2015, 03:58:44 PM
From Ms. Wacky today at work:

Quote
so we have like 30+ reps and 7-8 people on the call from (place of work)
and we are like mid call and all of a sudden we hear this women, at first it sounds like a child...and then MOANING
some women was getting it good on the call and they didn’t have it on Mute
seriously..someone was either doing it or watching porn during the call

 :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on June 29, 2015, 03:59:50 PM
Did you edit that or just c/p?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 29, 2015, 04:02:27 PM
Did you edit that or just c/p?
Only edit was (place of work)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Saulbadguy on June 29, 2015, 04:12:59 PM
Does your work have a "pantry?" I'm at an office this week that has one, it's pretty boss. Tons of free crap like coconut water, San pellegrino, Greek yogurt and wasabi peas.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on June 29, 2015, 04:15:16 PM
Does your work have a "pantry?" I'm at an office this week that has one, it's pretty boss. Tons of free crap like coconut water, San pellegrino, Greek yogurt and wasabi peas.

no but we have a fridge with nasty ass condiments/leftovers that people forget about.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: cas4ksu on June 29, 2015, 08:33:24 PM
I sit by an older lady (40s-50s) and she complains about how her ducks and chickens really upset her. She speaks about them as if they are her children. It's amusing.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on June 29, 2015, 11:22:17 PM

Does your work have a "pantry?" I'm at an office this week that has one, it's pretty boss. Tons of free crap like coconut water, San pellegrino, Greek yogurt and wasabi peas.

I once worked in an office that supplied Nantucket Nectars. It was kind of random.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on June 30, 2015, 08:00:28 AM
Our office used to have free snacks (i.e. granola bars, cookies, crackers) and a fridge full of soda and bottled water.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on June 30, 2015, 08:21:22 AM
We have a snack cabinet and free cans of pop, plus there are a bunch of beers...also my boss has been bringing in deer jerky the last couple weeks :lick:.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on June 30, 2015, 10:54:10 AM
We have a snack cabinet and free cans of pop, plus there are a bunch of beers...also my boss has been bringing in deer jerky the last couple weeks :lick:.

At any given time, there is usually a 30 pack in our office fridge with various liquors scattered in different cabinets.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on June 30, 2015, 11:13:56 AM
how is that possible? people would be fired on the spot (has happened)for bringing booze in
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on June 30, 2015, 11:16:03 AM
Do people ever drink the office booze at work, though? I worked at a place that had beers in the fridge, but no one ever touched them.  It was as if they were just office decorations, or a way for people to feel that they worked in a relaxed work environment. Boss was a huge alcoholic, though, so there's that.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on June 30, 2015, 11:21:55 AM
Its not uncommon for me to drink a beer or three the last couple hours of a friday.  Especially in the summer.   :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on June 30, 2015, 11:29:08 AM
Do people ever drink the office booze at work, though? I worked at a place that had beers in the fridge, but no one ever touched them.  It was as if they were just office decorations, or a way for people to feel that they worked in a relaxed work environment. Boss was a huge alcoholic, though, so there's that.

Yes, we do from time to time.  Usually in the evening when going over projects.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on June 30, 2015, 11:29:29 AM
how is that possible? people would be fired on the spot (has happened)for bringing booze in

Small business bro.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Saulbadguy on June 30, 2015, 11:31:48 AM
I booze at lunch but not in the office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on June 30, 2015, 11:36:18 AM
how is that possible? people would be fired on the spot (has happened)for bringing booze in

Small business bro.
are you hiring?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Trogdor on June 30, 2015, 11:37:49 AM
I talked to a company once that has a beer hour on Fridays
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on June 30, 2015, 12:22:06 PM
Like every construction office has beer Fridays
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on June 30, 2015, 12:25:44 PM
Idk, of the ppl I know, marketing is the biggest boozefest at work. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on June 30, 2015, 12:29:31 PM
Last place I worked they had team building meetings on Thurs at 3pm and it was just a boozefest
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 30, 2015, 01:29:31 PM
Today, at work, I literally witnessed a dumpster fire in our building parking lot. Sign from god!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on June 30, 2015, 01:33:27 PM
My office has a happy hour every Thursday (our Friday) in the conference room. Knob creek, Del Tremens and the wine is probably also nice but I know nothing about wine. Was weird at first but now I've come to appreciate how classy it is.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mhkpasa on June 30, 2015, 01:34:05 PM
We'll drink a beer at our desks at about 3:30 every Friday. A few times a year we'll hit a patio at 3 and drink on the company card for a couple hours and BS (<20 employees)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on June 30, 2015, 03:12:39 PM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on June 30, 2015, 03:13:54 PM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.
Sounds like DSI
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on June 30, 2015, 03:15:15 PM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The_Wippuh on June 30, 2015, 03:53:01 PM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.

All cool stuff when you're 25.  Not a priority when you're 35 and have a family.  Give me a competitive salary, good hours, solid benefits and I'll buy my own drinks.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KCFDcat on June 30, 2015, 04:06:55 PM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

This. My wife's office provides lunch and they expect a solid ten hours of work every day. It's hell.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on June 30, 2015, 04:15:31 PM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

This. My wife's office provides lunch and they expect a solid ten hours of work every day. It's hell.

Only 10 hrs..... pffffffttttttt.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on June 30, 2015, 04:22:31 PM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.
Good luck in your new marketing job!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Duncan on June 30, 2015, 04:54:29 PM
Like every construction office has beer Fridays


Same with Architecture/Design. We drink all the time.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Duncan on June 30, 2015, 04:56:48 PM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.


Have a friend that works for a mid-size construction firm - the same, and even have freshly made salads everyday - healthy office place thing. He never has to bring in anything to eat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on June 30, 2015, 05:31:34 PM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on July 01, 2015, 07:55:09 AM
So, I just came from a job interview.  Their break room had 3 freezers of frozen food to heat up for breakfast/lunch/dinner. A liquor cabinet, filled with high end liquor. Two fridges with beer, soda and water.  Two cabinets of chips/cookies. Three drawers of candy bars and gum.  Multiple expresso and coffee machines.  Foosball, Golden Tee, ping pong table, shuffle board table and 3 TVs.
Good luck in your new marketing job!

Software sales, buddy.  Sometimes I feel like you don't know me at all. :)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on July 01, 2015, 07:57:54 AM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on July 01, 2015, 08:14:24 AM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him

we are extremely rude to each other for no reason at all. i have the same irl relationship with waks. i don't know why we do it. we all like each other (i think).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on July 01, 2015, 10:34:23 AM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him

we are extremely rude to each other for no reason at all. i have the same irl relationship with waks. i don't know why we do it. we all like each other (i think).
Sounds like a classic case of sexual tension to me.*




*not that there is anything wrong with that
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on July 01, 2015, 11:09:50 AM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him

we are extremely rude to each other for no reason at all. i have the same irl relationship with waks. i don't know why we do it. we all like each other (i think).
Sounds like a classic case of sexual tension to me.*




*not that there is anything wrong with that

it's not my fault that i'm incredibly attractive. i was born this way.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on July 01, 2015, 11:51:00 AM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him

we are extremely rude to each other for no reason at all. i have the same irl relationship with waks. i don't know why we do it. we all like each other (i think).

You were pretty mean to me at my bday party until I shut you up with a wiffle ball walk off.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on July 01, 2015, 12:52:25 PM
bubs asked me if i had tourettes today. apparently he doesn't like it when i sing to him.

that's extremely rude of him

we are extremely rude to each other for no reason at all. i have the same irl relationship with waks. i don't know why we do it. we all like each other (i think).

You were pretty mean to me at my bday party until I shut you up with a wiffle ball walk off.

my competitive edge gets the best of me sometimes. i'm sorry. i hope you can forgive me.

side note: i was subjected to two wiffle ball walk off losses in one month.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Trogdor on July 01, 2015, 01:50:34 PM
Guy said he when to THE Ohio State during a conference call. Do normal people do that too? I thought it was just athletes. Made it even weirder/funnier that he was a massive dork.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on July 01, 2015, 01:58:10 PM
I work with a guy who went to OSU and he has never referred to it as THE Ohio State University.  And he is always blurting out dumb sports cliche's. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KCFDcat on July 01, 2015, 09:57:54 PM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

This. My wife's office provides lunch and they expect a solid ten hours of work every day. It's hell.

Only 10 hrs..... pffffffttttttt.

typo...12 hrs. 7am - 7pm errday. lunch is expected to be taken at your desk.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on July 02, 2015, 08:05:06 AM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

This. My wife's office provides lunch and they expect a solid ten hours of work every day. It's hell.

Only 10 hrs..... pffffffttttttt.

typo...12 hrs. 7am - 7pm errday. lunch is expected to be taken at your desk.

Is that even legal?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Canary on July 02, 2015, 08:07:17 AM
They will expect you to never leave, fwiw.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

This. My wife's office provides lunch and they expect a solid ten hours of work every day. It's hell.

Only 10 hrs..... pffffffttttttt.

typo...12 hrs. 7am - 7pm errday. lunch is expected to be taken at your desk.

Is that even legal?
Just this week I questioned someone about that very thing. I don't know of any business that can legally mandate those kind of hours, whether it be five or seven days a week.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on July 02, 2015, 08:28:18 AM
They arent formally telling people they have to work those hours it is implied.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on July 02, 2015, 08:39:24 AM
If you are salaried companies have WIDE latitude to enforce all kinds of expectations about working environment.  For most service sector, food service getting a promotion to manager can actually result in a pay cut per hour.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on July 02, 2015, 09:52:35 AM
I work 7am to 5:30pm, 5 days a week. I also log on remotely sometimes in the evenings/weekends to answer emails and generally catch up on crap that I didn't get done while at the office. While the hours seem pretty long (10-10.5 hrs/day), it really isn't terrible at all...casual environment, beer friendly, ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc in the office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on July 02, 2015, 10:09:44 AM
I work 7am to 5:30pm, 5 days a week. I also log on remotely sometimes in the evenings/weekends to answer emails and generally catch up on crap that I didn't get done while at the office. While the hours seem pretty long (10-10.5 hrs/day), it really isn't terrible at all...casual environment, beer friendly, ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc in the office

Do you count the times you are playing ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc as "work" hours?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Havs on July 02, 2015, 10:14:33 AM
Texas Tech Grads... and the chlamydia rate in Lubbock.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on July 02, 2015, 10:16:16 AM
I would never play ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool in my free time
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 02, 2015, 12:19:29 PM
DSI set that stuff up as a trap. Like, it was a psychological thing. All the IT dorks had fair game to it, but if someone in sales was seen playing with that stuff, it meant to them that you didn't give a crap about your job.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on July 02, 2015, 12:28:46 PM
I work 7am to 5:30pm, 5 days a week. I also log on remotely sometimes in the evenings/weekends to answer emails and generally catch up on crap that I didn't get done while at the office. While the hours seem pretty long (10-10.5 hrs/day), it really isn't terrible at all...casual environment, beer friendly, ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc in the office

Do you count the times you are playing ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc as "work" hours?

i would assume he does when he plays against his co-workers. when he gets his ass kicked at ping pong by me, i highly doubt he reports that
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on July 02, 2015, 01:04:14 PM
has anyone looked at the details of the new work hours thing?  i'd like to get paid overtime.  someone on the radio was talking about it was fairly complicated.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 02, 2015, 01:08:24 PM
has anyone looked at the details of the new work hours thing?  i'd like to get paid overtime.  someone on the radio was talking about it was fairly complicated.

raising the ot exemption salary level from 26k to 51k. i dont think the rule is very complicated, but employers will be doing complex backflips to avoid whatever they can
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on July 02, 2015, 01:12:44 PM
it sounded more complicated than that.  like above 51k salaried are also entitled to overtime if they aren't truly managers.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on July 02, 2015, 01:35:32 PM
There's a thread in the pit about it but no one cared  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on July 02, 2015, 02:19:45 PM
well i just looked it up and figured out that it very likely wouldn't apply to me, so now i don't care either.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on July 02, 2015, 04:26:12 PM
I work 7am to 5:30pm, 5 days a week. I also log on remotely sometimes in the evenings/weekends to answer emails and generally catch up on crap that I didn't get done while at the office. While the hours seem pretty long (10-10.5 hrs/day), it really isn't terrible at all...casual environment, beer friendly, ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc in the office

Do you count the times you are playing ping pong/shuffleboard/darts/pool/etc as "work" hours?

i would assume he does when he plays against his co-workers. when he gets his ass kicked at ping pong by me, i highly doubt he reports that

I do not charge work hours when we're doing that sort of thing...but it's usually on Friday afternoons anyways

TBT I believe that I still lead the series for the record...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on July 02, 2015, 04:31:50 PM
look at shellshock in delusion land  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 07, 2015, 12:37:11 PM
I don't know if this is hilarious, but ever since my coworker moved next to me in his new cubicle, he's played the "Knights tale" soundtrack everyday, all day, for the last 3 weeks.  :curse: I mean, I don't know where that movie hold with him in his heart, but I'm about to tell him Heath Ledger is dead.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Bloodfart on July 07, 2015, 12:45:26 PM
We Will Rock You
Low Rider
Takin' Care Of Business
Golden Years
Further On Up the Road
Get Ready
I Want To Take You Higher
The Boys Are Back In Town
You Shook Me All Night Long
We Are the Champions

Those are all pretty great songs Wacky.  Sounds to me like you hate fun and stuff. T's & P's bud
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 07, 2015, 12:50:48 PM
I mean, I was having a great time the first couple of days he sat next to me, but every day?! EVERY DAY! I'm just saying.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Spracne on July 07, 2015, 12:51:31 PM
I mean, I was having a great time the first couple of days he sat next to me, but every day?! EVERY DAY! I'm just saying.

Fight back with the Prince of Egypt soundtrack.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on July 07, 2015, 12:53:14 PM
top gun soundtrack, jmho
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 07, 2015, 12:55:29 PM
What about Garden State? Man, that would really get him good.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on July 07, 2015, 01:21:56 PM
Just play Thunder right before all of your appointments to get pumped up.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ChiCat on July 07, 2015, 02:51:54 PM
Just play the boys are back in town on repeat

http://www.vice.com/read/i-played-the-boys-are-back-in-town-on-a-bar-jukebox-until-i-got-kicked-out-832
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on July 07, 2015, 02:53:19 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on July 15, 2015, 09:35:57 AM
Not my office, but at the training I'm at, the instructor has this webpage as one of his frequently visited sites when he opens up chrome: www.rense.com
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 15, 2015, 09:39:32 AM
Not my office, but at the training I'm at, the instructor has this webpage as one of his frequently visited sites when he opens up chrome: www.rense.com

(http://www.rense.com/1.mpicons/newjeffport112010_2.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on July 15, 2015, 12:56:38 PM
Awesome advertising space available. SAUL!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on July 15, 2015, 01:10:28 PM
so we do a crap ton of video conferencing here. well, they now have a treadmill with a camera on it so we can walk while VC'ing.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on July 15, 2015, 05:10:49 PM
so we do a crap ton of video conferencing here. well, they now have a treadmill with a camera on it so we can walk while VC'ing.

that is hilarious.

they should give the person on the other end of the call control over the treadmill speed.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: cfbandyman on July 15, 2015, 11:48:01 PM
top gun soundtrack, jmho

Isn't that just "Highway to the Danger Zone" like 5 times with "Take my Breath Away?" I wouldn't count them singing in the bar as part of the soundtrack
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on July 16, 2015, 07:39:21 AM
top gun soundtrack, jmho

Isn't that just "Highway to the Danger Zone" like 5 times with "Take my Breath Away?" I wouldn't count them singing in the bar as part of the soundtrack
ltgstiq
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on July 16, 2015, 07:42:40 AM
PLAAAAAAaaaaaYING, PLAAAAAAaaaaaYING WITH THE BOYZ!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on July 16, 2015, 08:12:59 AM
top gun soundtrack, jmho

Isn't that just "Highway to the Danger Zone" like 5 times with "Take my Breath Away?" I wouldn't count them singing in the bar as part of the soundtrack

Mr. Mister is highly disappointed in you.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WildcatNkilt on July 16, 2015, 10:48:13 AM
so we do a crap ton of video conferencing here. well, they now have a treadmill with a camera on it so we can walk while VC'ing.

that is hilarious.

they should give the person on the other end of the call control over the treadmill speed.

It only goes up to 4 mph  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on July 16, 2015, 11:01:29 AM
yeah I wanted to be the first person in modern history to run full speed while VC'ing with a customer.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on July 16, 2015, 11:14:20 AM
yeah I wanted to be the first person in modern history to run full speed while VC'ing with a customer.

WOULD WATCH!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on August 04, 2015, 03:39:02 PM
I just cleaned out an ex-employees desk. Wow! I imagine this is what Puni's desk looks like. Every drawer I open contained a half eaten something or other. There were at least 4 different half eaten candy bars and 6 mostly empty bags of m&m's. Tupperware containers and cans and boxes of food everywhere.






Edit - I really want to take a shower right now.  :Yuck:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on August 04, 2015, 03:41:08 PM
this is what #lunchacking realignment looks like
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 04, 2015, 03:42:59 PM
did some of it still look more edible?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 04, 2015, 03:43:55 PM
this is what #lunchacking realignment looks like

CALLING ME OUT WHERE YOU DIDNT THINK I WOULD SEE IT, EH?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on August 04, 2015, 03:45:34 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ednksu on August 04, 2015, 03:52:41 PM
hur hur hur
omg thats so zap
much cool  :flush:
(I'm I acting like a child right with emoticons?)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 04, 2015, 03:56:50 PM
hur hur hur
omg thats so zap
much cool  :flush:
(I'm I acting like a child right with emoticons?)

you are going to be so rough ridin' pissed when you see michigan cat's story about you pooping on the floor in the pickup basketball thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 04, 2015, 04:10:38 PM
Power just went out and there's a party in the hallway
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on August 04, 2015, 04:17:43 PM
Power just went out and there's a party in the hallway

(http://media3.giphy.com/media/CruELm2SpceIM/giphy.gif)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Stevesie60 on August 05, 2015, 01:10:59 PM
hur hur hur
omg thats so zap
much cool  :flush:
(I'm I acting like a child right with emoticons?)

you are going to be so rough ridin' pissed when you see michigan cat's story about you pooping on the floor in the pickup basketball thread.

:lol:

This was especially great because I read that right before opening this thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on August 06, 2015, 01:05:24 AM
probably more adorable than hilarious, but i can't get enough of the english given names for people at our chinese offices.  doug, larry, ivan :love:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 06, 2015, 08:02:31 AM
probably more adorable than hilarious, but i can't get enough of the english given names for people at our chinese offices.  doug, larry, ivan :love:

I game with a lot of second generation asians and i've always thought it's so adorable how their names are very american. Nick, Charles, Charlie, Jason, alex. The one guy named karisachich or something legally changed his name to felix because he didn't like having a FOB name  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on August 06, 2015, 08:20:30 AM
I work with Chinese people in China and I've asked them why they do it and one guy said Americans wouldn't be able to remember their Chinese names. This was coming from a man who chose to go by Leslie.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 06, 2015, 08:26:21 AM
I brought in donut holes today. Guess what Paul said? He said "well where is the rest of the donut??"

we all had a pretty good laugh but now everyone is pretty much back to work like normal.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on August 06, 2015, 08:33:21 AM
I brought in donut holes today. Guess what Paul said? He said "well where is the rest of the donut??"

we all had a pretty good laugh but now everyone is pretty much back to work like normal.
I always enjoy that joke
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on August 06, 2015, 08:58:29 AM
I work with Chinese people in China and I've asked them why they do it and one guy said Americans wouldn't be able to remember their Chinese names. This was coming from a man who chose to go by Leslie.

see what i mean?  super adorbs
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on August 06, 2015, 09:32:51 PM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AbeFroman on August 06, 2015, 10:31:06 PM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

They have a thing like this at my job. You get 20% off using the thumb print instead of debit card
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on August 07, 2015, 06:38:00 AM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

They have a thing like this at my job. You get 20% off using the thumb print instead of debit card
Sounds great. I might cut off Abe's thumb to get a discount!   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on August 07, 2015, 10:58:09 AM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

They have a thing like this at my job. You get 20% off using the thumb print instead of debit card
Sounds great. I might cut off Abe's thumb to get a discount!   :thumbsup:
Slobber, don't do it!!!  It will stink up your wallet.  :Wha:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AbeFroman on August 07, 2015, 11:58:25 AM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

They have a thing like this at my job. You get 20% off using the thumb print instead of debit card
Sounds great. I might cut off Abe's thumb to get a discount!   :thumbsup:

Who said I have an account set up  ;)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on August 07, 2015, 12:27:56 PM

https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

They have a thing like this at my job. You get 20% off using the thumb print instead of debit card
Sounds great. I might cut off Abe's thumb to get a discount!   :thumbsup:

Who said I have an account set up  ;)
Want your thumb back?


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on August 10, 2015, 03:18:41 PM
https://32market.com/

Removed our coke and snack vending machines today.  Replaced with this kiosk and racks of food/drinks.  Now I have no outlet for my change drawer.  You can access your account using a thumb print. 



Tom

Sounds like an Apple'esqu conspiracy to obtain thumbprints....
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on August 13, 2015, 02:10:11 PM
Today we were notified about our cost of living raise. It was a whopping .22%! My manager sold me on this job making it sound like I'd get a 5K raise come July.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on August 13, 2015, 03:48:28 PM

Today we were notified about our cost of living raise. It was a whopping .22%! My manager sold me on this job making it sound like I'd get a 5K raise come July.  :lol:
Mods please move to the reasons wacky should quit master thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on August 13, 2015, 03:49:35 PM

Today we were notified about our cost of living raise. It was a whopping .22%! My manager sold me on this job making it sound like I'd get a 5K raise come July.  :lol:
Mods please move to the reasons wacky should quit master thread
I'm trying bud. I mean, I'm so over all these interviews lately. I want the process to move faster.  :Yuck:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on August 13, 2015, 03:50:12 PM
the front desk receptionist got his hair cut into a mullet today on purpose.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on August 13, 2015, 03:54:01 PM

the front desk receptionist got his hair cut into a mullet today on purpose.
[/quote
Weird thing for bubbles to do
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 13, 2015, 03:55:07 PM
just saw 2 guys I work with planking in a conference room.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on August 13, 2015, 03:57:53 PM

the front desk receptionist got his hair cut into a mullet today on purpose.
[/quote
Weird thing for bubbles to do

bubbles is not allowed to touch the phone or talk to anyone.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 13, 2015, 03:59:23 PM
just saw 2 guys I work with planking in a conference room.

you definitely should have knocked...
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on August 13, 2015, 03:59:58 PM
Today we were notified about our cost of living raise. It was a whopping .22%! My manager sold me on this job making it sound like I'd get a 5K raise come July.  :lol:
#there'sasuckerborneveryday
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on August 13, 2015, 04:05:00 PM
Today we were notified about our cost of living raise. It was a whopping .22%! My manager sold me on this job making it sound like I'd get a 5K raise come July.  :lol:

That's terrible, but not surprising.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 13, 2015, 04:06:21 PM
just saw 2 guys I work with planking in a conference room.

Did you tell them that planking has been out for like 4 years?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 13, 2015, 04:07:32 PM
. 22 is a bigger insult than zero
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 13, 2015, 04:08:37 PM
just saw 2 guys I work with planking in a conference room.

Did you tell them that planking has been out for like 4 years?

I told them that if I ever see it again I'm calling the police.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on August 13, 2015, 04:13:39 PM
. 22 is a bigger insult than zero
I agree.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SdK on August 13, 2015, 04:15:51 PM
Yeah. They can defintely take their 66ish bucks and shove it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mhkpasa on August 13, 2015, 04:23:52 PM
Yeah. They can defintely take their 66ish bucks and shove it.

Haha, ouch SDK
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SdK on August 13, 2015, 04:49:51 PM
Calling it a cost of living increase is laughable. Calling it a "Go see your KSU Cats on us" increase is nice. I'll take the latter anyday.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Stevesie60 on August 13, 2015, 06:34:08 PM
They should have just done the math to see what .22% would be over the next year and given it to you up front in cash.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on August 13, 2015, 08:11:10 PM

They should have just done the math to see what .22% would be over the next year and given it to you up front in cash.

Like out of the walking around money in their wallet
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on August 13, 2015, 08:15:01 PM
I wanted to calculate what that would be for me and I had to do the calculation 3 times before I put enough zeros in front of the "22" to get an accurate answer.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 19, 2015, 01:16:02 PM
how many people in yours guys offices have made some form of "subway has a new menu item: a kids meal!" joke that they think is really funny?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 19, 2015, 01:16:34 PM
None
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 19, 2015, 01:17:30 PM
nobody yet
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: GBEMAW on August 19, 2015, 01:17:56 PM
do people at other companies always hit the button for the handicapped door or is this specific to working at a tech company that hires almost exclusively people under the age of 25?

tia
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 19, 2015, 01:18:21 PM
3
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: deputy dawg on August 19, 2015, 04:49:05 PM
do people at other companies always hit the button for the handicapped door or is this specific to working at a tech company that hires almost exclusively people under the age of 25?

tia

There are several in my building, and people tell me that they don't want to touch a germy door.  They seem to be willing to touch as germy handicapped door opener, though.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dub on August 19, 2015, 04:59:04 PM
If anyone has a window or is within visibility somehow of a Little Caesar's, it's an amazing phenomenon that  50-75% of people can not start driving without starting to eat their Hot N Readys.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on August 19, 2015, 08:10:03 PM

how many people in yours guys offices have made some form of "subway has a new menu item: a kids meal!" joke that they think is really funny?
Only one that I am aware of as of now... :thisguy:


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on August 19, 2015, 08:10:55 PM
Pff
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on August 19, 2015, 09:11:30 PM
I don't get the subway joke
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on August 19, 2015, 09:12:03 PM
oh now I do. :blank:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 21, 2015, 02:33:31 PM
They're planking again.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:52:49 PM
They're planking again.

Go tell them to upgrade to owling.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:54:09 PM
I don't even want to know what the hell owling is. :facepalm:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:54:55 PM
I don't even want to know what the hell owling is. :facepalm:

(http://images-cdn.9gag.com/photo/164582_700b_v1.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 21, 2015, 02:55:30 PM
wow
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:57:45 PM
JFC!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:57:54 PM
Owling was popular back in 2011. Actually they should try Horsemanning....

(http://www.oddee.com/_media/imgs/articles2/a97885_horsemaning_8.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:58:18 PM
Just stop.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 21, 2015, 02:58:35 PM
 :buh-bye:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 21, 2015, 02:59:16 PM
I haven't even mentioned coning or stocking yet.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 21, 2015, 03:05:53 PM
keep going  :excited:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on August 21, 2015, 03:06:46 PM
I don't even want to know what the hell owling is. :facepalm:

(http://images-cdn.9gag.com/photo/164582_700b_v1.jpg)

This looks exactly like the naked hot tub roommate
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 21, 2015, 03:14:35 PM
keep going  :excited:

Coning
https://youtu.be/qwt0yfWmlhI?t=50s

Stocking
http://stockingisthenewplanking.tumblr.com/
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on August 21, 2015, 03:33:20 PM
Someone did the "WHAT ARE THOSE?" meme to me at work today.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 25, 2015, 11:42:01 AM
The term "mathematical masterbation" was just used in a meeting.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on September 02, 2015, 10:54:35 AM
Quote from: company wide email
As soon as you are installed, start Instant Messaging (IMing: yep, it’s a verb!)

:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on September 02, 2015, 10:59:26 AM
did you get Lync, mich?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on September 02, 2015, 11:01:50 AM
did you get Lync, mich?

nope!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on September 02, 2015, 01:43:59 PM
like a week ago there was some livestock outside and like half the people at work went over and just watched them out the window for like 10 minutes
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Unruly on September 02, 2015, 02:25:41 PM
This story started out preparing for :sdeek: but turned into :lol:

I walked by the window and glanced out and saw one of those itty bitty smart cars just sitting on the on ramp(no shoulder) of the interstate up here.

I was fully expecting to see someone blast this tiny car at 60 because they didn't see it so I kept watching. Time went by and one of the AAA trucks showed up behind it so I thought he was saved. The AAA dude walks up to the car, talks to the guy for a min, then gets back in his truck and drives off leaving the dude there.

I was absolutely puzzled and again, waited for the inevitable to happen.  5 mins later a trooper in an SUV shows up behind him, so again I think the guy is saved.  Sure enough the trooper talks to him for a min, then walks back to his car and gets in starting to pull off like he is leaving. The trooper was actually just re-positioning himself. He then eases his bumper into the rear of this rinky dink smart car and just starts pushing it down the highway like a boss.  It was great.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on September 14, 2015, 04:48:48 PM
a coworker (in the friend zone) sent me an email asking for my help with something and i replied with

"MICROSOFT EXCHANGE AUTO REPLY" in the subject

and "DELETED: MESSAGE CATEGORIZED AS SPAM" in the body

and he thought his message really got deleted as spam! lol what an awesome prank  :Lolrun:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on September 16, 2015, 08:35:09 AM
girl at work was just explaining to a coworker who had never been to a chiefs game before that she recommends wearing earplugs. her aspie score must be off the charts
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on September 16, 2015, 09:14:02 AM
girl at work was just explaining to a coworker who had never been to a chiefs game before that she recommends wearing earplugs. her aspie score must be off the charts

Is your co-worker a baby? Because if so that is good advice.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on September 16, 2015, 09:19:22 AM
http://www.earplugstore.com/nfl-ear-plugs-kansas-city-chiefs.html

Tell the coworker to give Linda a call.

(http://e71ee3cec062f0ed5754-ee664a0afa3d7a6e88d3bedbbfd35f64.r80.cf2.rackcdn.com/rndemp-linda.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on September 16, 2015, 09:21:07 AM
http://www.earplugstore.com/nfl-ear-plugs-kansas-city-chiefs.html

Tell the coworker to give Linda a call.

(http://e71ee3cec062f0ed5754-ee664a0afa3d7a6e88d3bedbbfd35f64.r80.cf2.rackcdn.com/rndemp-linda.jpg)

Quote
Suggested Uses for NFL Team Ear Plugs:
Hand them out to your buddies at the tailgate party.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on September 16, 2015, 12:31:26 PM
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on September 16, 2015, 01:35:22 PM

you should steal the sign so everybody tries to eat them  :Lolrun:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Poster formerly known as jthutch on October 01, 2015, 02:35:36 PM

Guys I'm going to be rich  :excited:



Kindly Accept & Acknowledge my Proposal!

I am Roy. Claude, I am an accountant with the Standard Chartered Bank in the United Kingdom, I am the accountant of a late client who passed away 4 yrs ago without living any trace or heir to a huge funds under my possession as his personal account office with my bank.

I understand that through Internet is not the best way to link up with you but because of the confidentiality which my proposal demands but i choose to reach you through this medium because i have sent same letter one month ago with no response from you, but I am not sure if it did get to you since I have not heard from you. Hence my reason for contacting you through the Internet which has been abused over the years.
I am contacting you again based on the fact that you bear same last name as the deceased hence i will like to put you in as the heir to the sum of £5,600, 000.00 sterling pounds. In the last testament of our deceased client name now withed and will be review upon your reply.

My major aim is to see that the funds is not confiscated by the bank or the Government because after 5 yrs without claim, the funds will be sent to the reserve bank as unclaimed hence i will like us to share the proceeds of the funds since i can not do this alone without your help as the heir to be.
Upon your acceptance to work with me in the profitable business idea , I will furnish you will all the necessary information and what is required to get this done within 14 working days .

Please do forward me your contact details for more information with regards to this business deal including your full names ,telephone numbers and your address and name of who you want as the next of kin to the funds and i will file in for the claim on your behalf to enable us begin this project.

I will expect to hear from you soonest.

Yours Truly,
Roy Claude
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 08, 2015, 09:51:41 AM
just had a coworker tell me that what he does for a living is harder than being a professional athlete :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on October 08, 2015, 11:25:45 AM
just had a coworker tell me that what he does for a living is harder than being a professional athlete :lol:

"harder" could mean anything

the pro athletes work harder, but they definitely love what they do. it is probably "harder" for that guy to force himself to fax and photocopy that memo.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 08, 2015, 11:36:12 AM
just had a coworker tell me that what he does for a living is harder than being a professional athlete :lol:

"harder" could mean anything

the pro athletes work harder, but they definitely love what they do. it is probably "harder" for that guy to force himself to fax and photocopy that memo.

Yeah if I was physically capable of being a pro athlete I would probably like my pro athlete job more than I like my current job.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on October 08, 2015, 11:46:06 AM
I just had a call from the leawood police department. "Sir, we have a reported accident with your 2002 pasat, etc." After listening to the VM I ran down to the parking lot (Thinking I did something wrong). Nope, a lady scraped/hit the side of my car with her rough ridin' beautiful Tahoe. I talked with the cops and said "My car is a piece of crap. I can probably just wash that off, I'm not worried about it, but i'll take her info". So I walk up to her car to apologize, that her nice car had to get dented in by my shitty car that was parked in between the lines (I know, sounds crazy) and guess what? It was a coworker.  :lol: She was so embarrassed. That poor thing, called the cops to report herself hitting my shitty car. I made sure she laughed about it when she got out of the car.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on October 08, 2015, 01:49:45 PM
I just had a call from the leawood police department. "Sir, we have a reported accident with your 2002 pasat, etc." After listening to the VM I ran down to the parking lot (Thinking I did something wrong). Nope, a lady scraped/hit the side of my car with her rough ridin' beautiful Tahoe. I talked with the cops and said "My car is a piece of crap. I can probably just wash that off, I'm not worried about it, but i'll take her info". So I walk up to her car to apologize, that her nice car had to get dented in by my shitty car that was parked in between the lines (I know, sounds crazy) and guess what? It was a coworker.  :lol: She was so embarrassed. That poor thing, called the cops to report herself hitting my shitty car. I made sure she laughed about it when she got out of the car.

that's a good guy thing to do right there
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wabash909 on October 08, 2015, 02:00:09 PM
If somebody had done that to my 7 series I would have been super pissed.

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 08, 2015, 02:04:11 PM
I had a guy rear end me in a drive-thru a few weeks ago and he was so pissed with himself. I was just like chill brah and drove off without even looking to see if there was any damage to my car (there wasn't). I just didn't want to deal with it
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on October 08, 2015, 02:39:28 PM
being able to give a "lol, no big deal, don't worry your pretty little head about it." to some poor distraught fellow human that has slightly damaged your vehicle is a great feeling and one of the real perks of driving old beat up vehicles.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wabash909 on October 08, 2015, 02:55:00 PM
Wouldn't know the feeling. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on October 08, 2015, 04:02:48 PM
One time I got rear ended, didn't see any damage, and told the guy I wasn't worried about it. Then, I changed my focus from my car to the guy and notice that he looked very grimy, was missing quite a few teeth, and was definitely over the limit. He said, "OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I REALLY DO APPRECIATE IT. MY LICENSE IS SUSPENDED." He wanted to shake my hand. I just wanted to get out of the road.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on October 08, 2015, 04:55:00 PM
In college I rear ended a campus cop (rolled forward in neutral on a stick shift trying to pick up something off the floor of my car) and he was like "this isn't even my car, I don't care."  He made sure I had a license and wasn't drunk and let me go.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on October 09, 2015, 08:20:56 AM
Someone must have explosive shits on a pretty regular basis because the rear of the toilet always has a healthy dose of debris.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on October 09, 2015, 08:32:52 AM
Someone must have explosive shits on a pretty regular basis because the rear of the toilet always has a healthy dose of debris.
This should be in a separate thread.  :flush:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on October 09, 2015, 08:40:53 AM
I rolled forward and gently nudged a lady at the stop sign at 87th and Antioch a couple years ago...she got out and was making a huge scene. I walked up to the front of my car and my front grille was cracked (stupid plastic) and her hitch on the SUV had the grease rubbed off...she was still raising a scene and complaining about how she needed to see a doctor because I hit her too hard...blah blah blah

Luckily, a police officer was in the parking lot watching that intersection (because people rarely actually stop there) and saw the whole thing. He walked up and told the lady to calm down. She was freaking out on both of us saying she was going to sue and that she was hurt and that i'd be paying for all the damage to her shitty old Kia. GMAFB lady! After I told her I was an attorney that deals with this stuff every day and the cop said that he saw the whole thing as well, she realized her BS wouldn't work on us, she just got in her car and drove off without saying anything. Haven't heard anything else about it since that day.

Jokingly, the cop said, should I follow her and arrest her for fleeing the scene of an accident?  :lol:

The beauty of this whole deal is that i'm not an even an attorney :lol:

In the future, if I ever get pulled over in OP/Lenexa, I hope it's the same police officer. Then I can joke with him about remembering that time with the car accident and the lady freaked out...it will be great!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on October 09, 2015, 11:12:02 AM
I rolled forward and gently nudged a lady at the stop sign at 87th and Antioch a couple years ago...she got out and was making a huge scene. I walked up to the front of my car and my front grille was cracked (stupid plastic) and her hitch on the SUV had the grease rubbed off...she was still raising a scene and complaining about how she needed to see a doctor because I hit her too hard...blah blah blah

Luckily, a police officer was in the parking lot watching that intersection (because people rarely actually stop there) and saw the whole thing. He walked up and told the lady to calm down. She was freaking out on both of us saying she was going to sue and that she was hurt and that i'd be paying for all the damage to her shitty old Kia. GMAFB lady! After I told her I was an attorney that deals with this stuff every day and the cop said that he saw the whole thing as well, she realized her BS wouldn't work on us, she just got in her car and drove off without saying anything. Haven't heard anything else about it since that day.

Jokingly, the cop said, should I follow her and arrest her for fleeing the scene of an accident?  :lol:

The beauty of this whole deal is that i'm not an even an attorney :lol:

In the future, if I ever get pulled over in OP/Lenexa, I hope it's the same police officer. Then I can joke with him about remembering that time with the car accident and the lady freaked out...it will be great!

Pretty sure impersonating an attorney is a crime too. 

KAT KID (NOT) ESQ.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on October 09, 2015, 11:16:52 AM
It's a good thing nobody is on here impersonating a cop
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 09, 2015, 11:23:58 AM
:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on October 09, 2015, 11:24:26 AM
I rolled forward and gently nudged a lady at the stop sign at 87th and Antioch a couple years ago...she got out and was making a huge scene. I walked up to the front of my car and my front grille was cracked (stupid plastic) and her hitch on the SUV had the grease rubbed off...she was still raising a scene and complaining about how she needed to see a doctor because I hit her too hard...blah blah blah

Luckily, a police officer was in the parking lot watching that intersection (because people rarely actually stop there) and saw the whole thing. He walked up and told the lady to calm down. She was freaking out on both of us saying she was going to sue and that she was hurt and that i'd be paying for all the damage to her shitty old Kia. GMAFB lady! After I told her I was an attorney that deals with this stuff every day and the cop said that he saw the whole thing as well, she realized her BS wouldn't work on us, she just got in her car and drove off without saying anything. Haven't heard anything else about it since that day.

Jokingly, the cop said, should I follow her and arrest her for fleeing the scene of an accident?  :lol:

The beauty of this whole deal is that i'm not an even an attorney :lol:

In the future, if I ever get pulled over in OP/Lenexa, I hope it's the same police officer. Then I can joke with him about remembering that time with the car accident and the lady freaked out...it will be great!

The best part of this whole story is that none of it is true
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on October 09, 2015, 11:29:16 AM
i think that i hate shellshock.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 09, 2015, 11:30:43 AM
i think that i hate shellshock.

He doesn't seem like a good person
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 09, 2015, 11:33:31 AM
these last 3 posts weren't very hilarious
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on October 09, 2015, 11:38:22 AM
i think that i hate shellshock.

He doesn't seem like a good person

he seems like a pretty awful person, to be honest.

these last 3 posts weren't very hilarious

i'm being serious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 09, 2015, 11:46:54 AM
these last 3 posts weren't very hilarious

Are we not allowed to comment you friggin dweeb?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 09, 2015, 11:48:13 AM

these last 3 posts weren't very hilarious

Are we not allowed to comment you friggin dweeb?

am I not either :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 09, 2015, 11:55:09 AM
the next to last post gave me at least a mild chuckle. :)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 09, 2015, 12:29:56 PM
He certainly rivals that bigwillie guy
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on October 09, 2015, 12:56:57 PM
I'm pranking a guy at my work right now.  I can't tell you exactly what the prank is but just know that it's hilarious.   :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on October 09, 2015, 01:16:17 PM
I rolled forward and gently nudged a lady at the stop sign at 87th and Antioch a couple years ago...she got out and was making a huge scene. I walked up to the front of my car and my front grille was cracked (stupid plastic) and her hitch on the SUV had the grease rubbed off...she was still raising a scene and complaining about how she needed to see a doctor because I hit her too hard...blah blah blah

Luckily, a police officer was in the parking lot watching that intersection (because people rarely actually stop there) and saw the whole thing. He walked up and told the lady to calm down. She was freaking out on both of us saying she was going to sue and that she was hurt and that i'd be paying for all the damage to her shitty old Kia. GMAFB lady! After I told her I was an attorney that deals with this stuff every day and the cop said that he saw the whole thing as well, she realized her BS wouldn't work on us, she just got in her car and drove off without saying anything. Haven't heard anything else about it since that day.

Jokingly, the cop said, should I follow her and arrest her for fleeing the scene of an accident?  :lol:

The beauty of this whole deal is that i'm not an even an attorney :lol:

In the future, if I ever get pulled over in OP/Lenexa, I hope it's the same police officer. Then I can joke with him about remembering that time with the car accident and the lady freaked out...it will be great!

The best part of this whole story is that none of it is true

You don't even know me! Haters gonna hate!  :buh-bye:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on October 09, 2015, 01:18:57 PM
I rolled forward and gently nudged a lady at the stop sign at 87th and Antioch a couple years ago...she got out and was making a huge scene. I walked up to the front of my car and my front grille was cracked (stupid plastic) and her hitch on the SUV had the grease rubbed off...she was still raising a scene and complaining about how she needed to see a doctor because I hit her too hard...blah blah blah

Luckily, a police officer was in the parking lot watching that intersection (because people rarely actually stop there) and saw the whole thing. He walked up and told the lady to calm down. She was freaking out on both of us saying she was going to sue and that she was hurt and that i'd be paying for all the damage to her shitty old Kia. GMAFB lady! After I told her I was an attorney that deals with this stuff every day and the cop said that he saw the whole thing as well, she realized her BS wouldn't work on us, she just got in her car and drove off without saying anything. Haven't heard anything else about it since that day.

Jokingly, the cop said, should I follow her and arrest her for fleeing the scene of an accident?  :lol:

The beauty of this whole deal is that i'm not an even an attorney :lol:

In the future, if I ever get pulled over in OP/Lenexa, I hope it's the same police officer. Then I can joke with him about remembering that time with the car accident and the lady freaked out...it will be great!

Pretty sure impersonating an attorney is a crime too. 

KAT KID (NOT) ESQ.

It actually isn't. If I were to pretend to give legal advice after stating that I was an attorney, or trying to represent someone in court, then yes it would be illegal...but simply calling myself a lawyer in a public passing/conversation isn't.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ShellShock on October 09, 2015, 01:19:40 PM
i think that i hate shellshock.

He doesn't seem like a good person

I'm not a very good person, you're right.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on October 09, 2015, 01:37:46 PM
these last 3 posts weren't very hilarious

now imagine they happened in your office....
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWican on October 09, 2015, 01:50:03 PM
This one time we had some grass sod and scraps left over from one of our projects and we sodded our boss's office floor with it.  Took out his furniture and everything.    :ROFL:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWican on October 09, 2015, 01:54:35 PM
The main bossman is out of the office quite a bit and isn't really observant about some things.  So we had this shitty grandma-ey table lamp that no one knew where it came from, but it lived on a table in our office.  We relocated it to a corner table in his office and started an office pool on how long it would take for him to realize he had a new lamp.  "WHERE THE HELL DID THIS LAMP COME FROM?!" 2 weeks later.   :ROFL:  :ROFL:  :ROFL:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWican on October 09, 2015, 01:59:31 PM
There's an oldtimer in our office that is pretty #teamhardcopy by having hard copies of books, references, etc.,  so we rib him about it a little from time to time.  He maintains current copies of phone books still.  When we got the annual supply of Yellow Pages dumped on our front step this last year we snuck a couple dozen of them (mainly the halfsize copies) throughout books on his bookcases and strategically placed some all over his office.  It took him 4 days to realize he had been pranked.   :ROFL:  :ROFL:  :ROFL:  :ROFL:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on October 09, 2015, 02:51:14 PM
those are all pretty good hiliarious things at your office posts, EMAWican.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on October 12, 2015, 11:21:43 AM
My coworker keeps showing off this picture of her 5 year old flipping off the camera. She thinks it's adorable and keeps laughing when she shows it off.  :confused:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 12, 2015, 11:23:11 AM
those are all pretty good hiliarious things at your office posts, EMAWican.

they really are great
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: felix rex on October 20, 2015, 09:04:27 AM
This just got sent to the entire American embassy:

Quote
Subject: Lost & Found

A shawl was found two days ago, in the gentlemen restroom, LL Cairo I. If it is yours, please stop by the CLO to identify it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on October 20, 2015, 09:05:58 AM
Perhaps it is a trojan horse shawl, with integrated listening devices. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on October 20, 2015, 09:21:14 AM
LL Cairo I would make a great egyptian rapper name
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on October 30, 2015, 12:54:11 PM
have you guys ever had a coworker do the geico humpday camel commercial imitation but for a day that wasnt even humpday?

at first i was quietly exasperated, but now i think its kind of funny.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 30, 2015, 12:55:47 PM
Maybe this is the day that person has sex
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on October 30, 2015, 12:58:53 PM
Maybe this is the day that person has sex

that would be interesting and funny i guess but they dont even say "hump day"

they do the name name name name name name name guess what day it is?
THURSDAY [friday, etc]

im starting to think this person may have never seen the geico commercial and is just copying other people who were doing it despite having no understanding?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 30, 2015, 01:00:18 PM
Oh, ok, your first post did not properly express the situation
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on October 30, 2015, 01:01:17 PM
Oh, ok, your first post did not properly express the situation

I'll keep trying  :Carl:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on October 30, 2015, 01:29:47 PM
Halloween costume day! This may be the nerdiest costume I've ever seen. This guy has a shark's head coming out of the front of his shirt with fake blood and all and he has a toy chainsaw as a prop. Sharknado, right? But GET THIS. He also has, hanging from around his neck, a photo of himself talking to Ian Ziering at a comic book convention in front of a Sharknado backdrop. Haha.

The photo is terrible, too, because he didn't buy the official $100 promo photo, but had someone else take it from a distance on their phone. You can't even see his face in it - just the back of his head.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 30, 2015, 01:31:56 PM
My goodness  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 30, 2015, 02:06:49 PM
I never saw any of the Sharknado movies. Was there a photo of Ian Ziering talking to a fan caught up in the tornado in the movie? If not, that costume doesn't make sense.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on October 30, 2015, 02:14:46 PM
(https://waltbox.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/sharknado_2_movie_set.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 02, 2015, 11:26:59 AM
Company wide email. 3 people have responded to everyone that they will not attend or should not be included. 6 people have replied all telling us not to reply all. I am considering sending a "Royals won the World Series" message. I think our friends overseas need to be alerted of this.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 02, 2015, 12:31:21 PM
Quote
This is going to sound really racist, but the worst fans and Niners and Raiders games are the Latinos
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 02, 2015, 12:34:34 PM
Quote
This is going to sound really racist, but the worst fans and Niners and Raiders games are the Latinos

New indiana guy  :excited:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 02, 2015, 12:40:59 PM
there was also a funny halloween exchange about inappropriate parties. Another coworker who went to probably the WASP-iest school in the world was like, "so the sailing team can no longer have gangster parties" and the original guy (who did the niners fan quote) was like, "well, there's not any black students on the sailing team, right? So when would they have an opportunity to have a gangster party" or something like that. I had trouble following his logic.

Really nice guy though!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: SdK on November 02, 2015, 01:14:00 PM
Probably no black guys to offend?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Cire on November 02, 2015, 01:32:23 PM
Quote
This is going to sound really racist, but the worst fans and Niners and Raiders games are the Latinos

New indiana guy  :excited:

Indiana is super racist
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 02, 2015, 01:49:38 PM
He's not from Indiana
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on November 02, 2015, 02:22:33 PM
He's probably lived in Indiana at some point.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 03, 2015, 05:53:55 AM
Company wide email. 3 people have responded to everyone that they will not attend or should not be included. 6 people have replied all telling us not to reply all. I am considering sending a "Royals won the World Series" message. I think our friends overseas need to be alerted of this.


Gonna win 'em all!
It escalated last evening. I had deleted several of the responses, but I think it is around 40 right now. Lots of
"Please take me off this list."
"Stop replying all and please remove me from this list."
"Me, too."

Of course, a couple of people are just furious and have went to all caps: "PLEASE STOP REPLYING ALL!"

At least one helpful person did a tutorial on how to filter email so it goes directly into your deleted folder.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Unruly on November 03, 2015, 11:44:06 AM
Dobbs,

Please see: http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21202.0
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 03, 2015, 11:48:48 AM

Dobbs,

Please see: http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21202.0
but it is also hilarious!


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 06, 2015, 12:18:30 PM
typed "stud erection" in an email today
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 11, 2015, 07:13:24 PM
Maybe belongs in the pet peeve thread, but whenever someone says they're going to contact someone at my new work they say they're going to "ping" that person. Do other offices say this?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 11, 2015, 07:17:27 PM
Maybe they just want to make sure the computer is connected to the network :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 11, 2015, 07:18:41 PM
Maybe they just want to make sure the computer is connected to the network :dunno:

no it means they're going to email or call or slack or whatever
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 11, 2015, 07:23:43 PM

Maybe they just want to make sure the computer is connected to the network :dunno:

no it means they're going to email or call or slack or whatever

Yeah, I was making a bad joke about they had to ping your computer to test network connec.... nvm
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on November 11, 2015, 07:26:44 PM
I hear people say ping. Also, if someone is following up on an email they sent that hasn't yet been responded to, they'll forward that same email and put "ping" in the body. Nothing else. Just ping. These pinging acts are only done by the younger people.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on November 11, 2015, 07:31:08 PM
Maybe belongs in the pet peeve thread, but whenever someone says they're going to contact someone at my new work they say they're going to "ping" that person. Do other offices say this?

Calling people is "buzzing" at my office.  Just give me a buzz after you get out of that meeting.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on November 11, 2015, 07:45:20 PM
maybe ping is an acronym for something work related?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on November 11, 2015, 07:54:48 PM
Maybe belongs in the pet peeve thread, but whenever someone says they're going to contact someone at my new work they say they're going to "ping" that person. Do other offices say this?

Calling people is "buzzing" at my office.  Just give me a buzz after you get out of that meeting.

Buzz has been used for a while
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 11, 2015, 08:00:44 PM
Maybe belongs in the pet peeve thread, but whenever someone says they're going to contact someone at my new work they say they're going to "ping" that person. Do other offices say this?

Calling people is "buzzing" at my office.  Just give me a buzz after you get out of that meeting.

Buzz has been used for a while
I think of buzz as being specific to phone class or drop-ins
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on November 11, 2015, 08:05:51 PM
Here's the only work environment where ping is an acceptable term

(http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/55206283.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on November 11, 2015, 08:18:50 PM
Here's the only work environment where ping is an acceptable term

(http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/55206283.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: ednksu on November 12, 2015, 02:21:17 AM
Here's the only work environment where ping is an acceptable term

(http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/55206283.jpg)
I had hope someone else would post this.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on November 12, 2015, 09:56:56 AM
Seriously though I'm glad that term hasn't made it into my company's lingo (yet).  If I ever see or hear somebody use "ping" I will mock them by reenacting that line of the movie.  It will be me doing an imitation of Sean Connery doing an imitation of a Soviet sub captain.  It will be as ridiculous as it sounds and hopefully make the person who uses "ping" to become aware of just how dumb it is.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on November 12, 2015, 11:03:23 AM
can we just smack them upside the back of the head while yelling "Pong"?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 12, 2015, 11:35:03 AM
I mean you can do whatever you want in your office so probably
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 12, 2015, 01:06:17 PM
Ping means IM in my office for an ever growing # of wackos. I just say, "send me a lync"


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on November 12, 2015, 07:10:09 PM
Ping means IM in my office for an ever growing # of wackos. I just say, "send me a lync"


Gonna win 'em all!

Damn are you running XP or some crap? 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 12, 2015, 07:12:09 PM
why wouldn't you just say "send me an im"?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 12, 2015, 08:41:57 PM

Ping means IM in my office for an ever growing # of wackos. I just say, "send me a lync"


Gonna win 'em all!

Damn are you running XP or some crap?
yes. I still remember when we switched from Lotus Notes to Outlook. Large global company. Change across all countries and parts of the business is long and slow.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 12, 2015, 08:42:47 PM

why wouldn't you just say "send me an im"?
well, some people in our office wouldn't know what an IM is. The know what lync is.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 12, 2015, 08:45:38 PM
do you?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on November 12, 2015, 09:24:27 PM
But Lync is now called Skype for Business, so that wouldn't make sense.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on November 12, 2015, 09:26:25 PM
But Lync is now called Skype for Business, so that wouldn't make sense.

He's running XP dood.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: OK_Cat on November 12, 2015, 09:27:21 PM
I can't even imagine. I work for a school district for gods sake and we are running 7 at least
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 12, 2015, 09:51:42 PM
a hacker could rip off a company for way more money in a much shorter time than if they would just upgrade an outdated, old, non-supported for a full year and half system.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on November 12, 2015, 09:57:23 PM
 No one has ever heard of that movie you geezers
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 12, 2015, 10:04:31 PM
No one has ever heard of that movie you geezers

kids, smdh
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on November 13, 2015, 08:58:35 AM
there's an alarm that has been going off for twenty minutes that prevents me from thinking.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on November 13, 2015, 09:03:28 AM
there's an alarm that has been going off for twenty minutes that prevents me from thinking.

Do you have access to a hammer?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 13, 2015, 09:04:34 AM
"fork" it with franz
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: HerrSonntag on November 13, 2015, 09:55:37 AM
The internal remote access server we use at my company is called SEAM portal.

When people want to log in from home, often times, they won't say "I'm going to SEAM portal in, when i get home"  Or "I'm going to remote in, when..."   they say

"I'm going to SEAM in, when i get home"

Say that aloud.  And its not a minority of people, most people verbalize this concept in this fashion.  I am aghast at this on going double entendre that apparently no one but me notices.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 13, 2015, 10:25:29 AM
:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 16, 2015, 01:08:24 PM
my boss said "ping" four times in a meeting this morning.  another person at the meeting said it once when responding to him.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on November 16, 2015, 02:15:37 PM
my boss said "ping" four times in a meeting this morning.  another person at the meeting said it once when responding to him.

What does it mean?  Post the four sentences he used it in.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on November 16, 2015, 02:17:02 PM

my boss said "ping" four times in a meeting this morning.  another person at the meeting said it once when responding to him.

What does it mean?  Post the four sentences he used it in.
Please start saying "pong" in response
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 16, 2015, 02:23:48 PM
i can't recall verbatim.  all sentences were variations of:  can you ping this person or i'll ping that person.  my understanding of his usage was that it meant contact & communicate with no specific medium of communication specified.

i don't think you'd ping someone in the same room with you by voice, though.  i think some distance and electronic means of allowing communication to transpire across that distance is implied.  also i think you can probably only ping someone to initiate communication.  if someone pings you, i don't think you responding is also pinging.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on November 16, 2015, 02:28:27 PM
at our office when someone says ping they mean instant message
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on November 16, 2015, 02:46:55 PM
i can't recall verbatim.  all sentences were variations of:  can you ping this person or i'll ping that person.  my understanding of his usage was that it meant contact & communicate with no specific medium of communication specified.

i don't think you'd ping someone in the same room with you by voice, though.  i think some distance and electronic means of allowing communication to transpire across that distance is implied.  also i think you can probably only ping someone to initiate communication.  if someone pings you, i don't think you responding is also pinging.

What about the guy who said ping in response?  Did your boss say "hey carl you need ping this certain person and fill them in on the details" and carl said "OK boss I'll ping that person"? What wouldn't he just say "OK"?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 16, 2015, 02:57:45 PM
yes, exactly.  she just repeated the usage.  she probably felt that "ok" wasn't sufficient to demonstrate her capacity and commitment to pinging the indicated person.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on November 16, 2015, 03:06:38 PM
the people that all of you work with are idiots.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 16, 2015, 03:10:26 PM
Meet them at the statue and tell it to their faces,  preventativemaintenance&safetyhead!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on November 16, 2015, 03:11:06 PM
my boss said "ping" four times in a meeting this morning.  another person at the meeting said it once when responding to him.

How good is your Sean Connery impersonation?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 16, 2015, 03:12:27 PM
an exchange between two odb's today:

"You know what they say the number one cause of divorce is hahahah?"

"hahaha marriage"

"yeah hahahaha its marriage hahaha"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 16, 2015, 03:17:51 PM
my boss said "ping" four times in a meeting this morning.  another person at the meeting said it once when responding to him.

How good is your Sean Connery impersonation?

not as finely honed as my instinct for self-preservation.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on November 16, 2015, 03:18:59 PM

at our office when someone says ping they mean instant message

Same at everyone else's
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 16, 2015, 03:19:52 PM

at our office when someone says ping they mean instant message

Same at everyone else's

except mine.   :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: steve dave on November 16, 2015, 03:28:45 PM
an exchange between two odb's today:

"You know what they say the number one cause of divorce is hahahah?"

"hahaha marriage"

"yeah hahahaha its marriage hahaha"

ha, classic
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 16, 2015, 03:47:05 PM
Thanks puni  :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on November 16, 2015, 03:52:50 PM
The people I work with this year spend an incredible amount of time complaining about other people. 

Ironically, there is almost a perfect negative correlation between the amount of time my coworkers spend complaining and their own competence.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 16, 2015, 04:11:00 PM
I'll bet that gal in sys's office can ping your face off.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 09:02:52 AM
my office now has a truck with truck nuts  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: 8manpick on November 17, 2015, 09:06:51 AM
my office now has a truck with truck nuts  :frown:

You need to IRL PI the crap out of that dork
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 17, 2015, 09:08:49 AM
  tag the truck nuts with glue and a fistfull of pubes
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 17, 2015, 09:14:46 AM
Ping in my office definitely does not mean IM because I've heard it used to describe contacting someone outside the company who I am sure was not on any im platform. Also loved the joke, puni.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 17, 2015, 09:16:42 AM
Also I'm pretty sure that if there's an email error to our company email the auto reply says "thanks for pinging us!"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on November 17, 2015, 09:26:20 AM
my office now has a truck with truck nuts  :frown:

A person that works there has a truck with truck nuts or a company truck has truck nuts?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on November 17, 2015, 09:31:39 AM
my office now has a truck with truck nuts  :frown:

A person that works there has a truck with truck nuts or a company truck has truck nuts?
Tell your boss to paint some big hairy nuts on the bottom of his plane. Bet he would get all the laughs at NBAA.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 09:35:14 AM
my office now has a truck with truck nuts  :frown:

A person that works there has a truck with truck nuts or a company truck has truck nuts?

person that works here  :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 09:35:46 AM
kinda freaking out over here. do i quit my job?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 17, 2015, 09:38:32 AM
1-roughly what # of people work at your office?
2-is there a small pool of obvious candidates, or is the fact that some normal person in your office has truck nuts terrifying?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 17, 2015, 09:43:59 AM
60% of my coworkers are anthropomorphic truck nuts
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 17, 2015, 10:07:00 AM
Put some nutz on the beamer
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 10:21:30 AM
1-roughly what # of people work at your office?
2-is there a small pool of obvious candidates, or is the fact that some normal person in your office has truck nuts terrifying?

1- not very many. maybe 25.
2- i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

Put some nutz on the beamer

beamers dont need nutz. when you drive a beamer everyone automatically knows you have ginormous balls and they dont eff with you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 17, 2015, 10:34:56 AM
i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

do the nutz fit the owner's personality?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 17, 2015, 10:52:45 AM
1-roughly what # of people work at your office?
2-is there a small pool of obvious candidates, or is the fact that some normal person in your office has truck nuts terrifying?

1- not very many. maybe 25.
2- i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

Put some nutz on the beamer

beamers dont need nutz. when you drive a beamer everyone automatically knows you have ginormous balls and they dont eff with you.

I don't think you understand beamnutz
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:09:53 AM
1-roughly what # of people work at your office?
2-is there a small pool of obvious candidates, or is the fact that some normal person in your office has truck nuts terrifying?

1- not very many. maybe 25.
2- i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

Put some nutz on the beamer

beamers dont need nutz. when you drive a beamer everyone automatically knows you have ginormous balls and they dont eff with you.

I don't think you understand beamnutz

explain beamnutz then
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:10:45 AM
i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

do the nutz fit the owner's personality?

its a woman so who knows
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on November 17, 2015, 11:11:25 AM
Female trucknutz? Well i'll be.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 17, 2015, 11:11:37 AM
Meet them at the statue and tell it to their faces,  preventativemaintenance&safetyhead!
yeah wtf, he is rough ridin' up my bbsing with that username
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 17, 2015, 11:12:30 AM
Beamnutz aren't about flexin your own nuts, it's about your beamer flexin it's nutz. You really want everyone to think your beamer has no nutz. Give me a rough ridin' break brah
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 17, 2015, 11:18:55 AM
i know exactly who has the truck nutz.

do the nutz fit the owner's personality?

its a woman so who knows

 :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:28:01 AM
Beamnutz aren't about flexin your own nuts, it's about your beamer flexin it's nutz. You really want everyone to think your beamer has no nutz. Give me a rough ridin' break brah

brah, my beamer's nuts are under the hood. you wanna question my beamer's manhood you can meet me a quarter mile away in about 10 seconds.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:29:52 AM
im gonna race truck nutz chick for the truck nutz. if i win i will auction them off at FF16.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 17, 2015, 11:30:17 AM
Oh you're one of those guys? I bet you have stickers all over the beamer trying to fake nutz
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:34:50 AM
idk why im on trial here. if you want a ride in the 5 series lib you can just ask. no need to start with the bumper sticker smack talk.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 17, 2015, 11:39:12 AM
I bet the people at your work are posting on various other blogs about how someone they work with drives a nutless beamer with a broken window and having a hearty blog lol over it
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 17, 2015, 11:46:29 AM
Guys does Tonya wear like a BMW jacket and hat and always put his keys on the table at happy hour?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 17, 2015, 11:50:25 AM
He gives his keys to the bartender. He's not a loon, emo.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 17, 2015, 11:51:28 AM
Ok just making sure we didn't have a Joey Tribiani type situaish here.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 11:52:10 AM
the hat came with the car when i bought it. i dont own a bmw jacket  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 17, 2015, 12:02:30 PM
He gives his keys to the bartender. He's not a loon, emo.

man, wacky has been hanging on to that one
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep on November 17, 2015, 12:12:04 PM
He gives his keys to the bartender. He's not a loon, emo.

man, wacky has been hanging on to that one

glad i can make an impression on the youngster
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on November 17, 2015, 01:39:27 PM
 :D I was backing my guy, Tonya.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on November 17, 2015, 01:58:51 PM
Meet them at the statue and tell it to their faces,  preventativemaintenance&safetyhead!
yeah wtf, he is rough ridin' up my bbsing with that username

take it up with the mods.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on November 17, 2015, 02:47:21 PM
The following two phrases were just used in a meeting:

"hand job"
"I was going to lay a little pipe"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 17, 2015, 03:20:56 PM
Meet them at the statue and tell it to their faces,  preventativemaintenance&safetyhead!
yeah wtf, he is rough ridin' up my bbsing with that username

take it up with the mods.
:lol: :lol: :lol: i actually like it now
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on November 17, 2015, 03:47:27 PM
Meet them at the statue and tell it to their faces,  preventativemaintenance&safetyhead!
yeah wtf, he is rough ridin' up my bbsing with that username

take it up with the mods.
Great user name!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on November 17, 2015, 03:49:07 PM
The following two phrases were just used in a meeting:

"hand job"
"I was going to lay a little pipe"
I usually start with a hand job before I lay pipe. So be it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 17, 2015, 04:20:11 PM
The following two phrases were just used in a meeting:

"hand job"
"I was going to lay a little pipe"
I usually start with a hand job before I lay pipe. So be it.

in context:

"Give Mrs Gooch a Hand. Job well done!"

"The strut channel was too narrow. I was going to lay a little pipe in between the reinforcement channeloids but chose reinforced tubing instead."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on November 17, 2015, 08:17:59 PM
It was more like "That will be a hand job." i.e. You will have to do the calculations by hand, not an automated process.

And laying pipe was used in the sense of "laying groundwork" to get someone to accept some bad news.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 08:27:04 AM
Microagreesions of sexism.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on November 18, 2015, 09:12:29 AM
It was more like "That will be a hand job." i.e. You will have to do the calculations by hand, not an automated process.

And laying pipe was used in the sense of "laying groundwork" to get someone to accept some bad news.

now figure out how to work Finger Bang and Smack that Monkey into the next meeting.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Matt Mckee on November 18, 2015, 09:54:43 AM
In my office to ping someone is to reach out via IM or email.  Usually done as a reminder of something.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on November 18, 2015, 10:47:55 AM
There's a guy at work who has ignored several requests to provide me the email addresses of some of our offshore managers so they can be added add to the distribution list of a report I send out every day.  I'm about to break my dislike of that stupid term in order to send him another follow up email with PING in like a 72 point font.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 10:53:24 AM
DOG FRIENDLY OFFICE: DOG PEEING ON THE CARPET

^dogs are gross

Perhaps making it more hilarious is we're in a temporary shared space with other companies and the dog pissed next to another company's desk. The dog also just runs free and digs through other companies' trash and stuff. ha
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on November 18, 2015, 10:56:11 AM
DOG FRIENDLY OFFICE: DOG PEEING ON THE CARPET

^dogs are gross

Perhaps making it more hilarious is we're in a temporary shared space with other companies and the dog pissed next to another company's desk. The dog also just runs free and digs through other companies' trash and stuff. ha

corporate espionage dog
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 18, 2015, 10:56:49 AM
that sounds like a lot of fun
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 10:57:30 AM
i wish i could bring my dog(s) to work.  i'd be so much more productive.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 10:59:15 AM
Owner is an bad person

I've brought my dog to work a few times. I keep her on a leash the whole time tho and she just sleeps and doesn't pee
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on November 18, 2015, 11:02:54 AM
we have dog fridays here and 1 person brings their dog in. its wonderful.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 11:05:37 AM
There's a shop dog too, just goes around to people all day getting a head scratch and moving on to the next person, but basically outside all the time
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 11:47:54 AM
Also, I found out today that apparently the dog has been doing this regularly and the owner has no idea (because he just ignores the dog most of the time.) I also learned that when he moved from the east coast to the west coast, he had a psychiatrist friend write him a note that the dog was a mental support service dog so it could go on the plane. Like, he just brings the dog into restaurants now and says it's a service dog. And of course since it's not trained as a service dog it goes and smells other peoples' food and stuff. Great to watch.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 11:49:42 AM
it sounds to me like maybe this dog is fine and michigancat is slandering it on this message board because he knows we don't know the dog personally and thinks he can get away with it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 11:54:45 AM
I like the dog, she's very sweet. But she's also gross and doesn't belong in restaurants. And has a bad owner.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 12:02:21 PM
i'm just trying to figure out the truth, michigancat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 12:06:41 PM
I need a note
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on November 18, 2015, 12:13:12 PM
well as many of you know, i work on my family's sorghum ranch.  the other day i was eating lunch with my gramps, age: 91, and some of the ranch hands (gramps calls them "Howdy Doodies").  we were all finishing up some of mom's homemade enchiladas.  they are the Howdy Doodies favorite thing that mom makes. this time though, gramps bit down into a chicken bone that had snuck it's way into mom's enchiladas and hurt his mouth.  anyway, as we're taking the plates to the well to rinse them, gramps says, "time to go harvest some more Sore Gums".

my God, me and the Howdy Doodies haven't laughed that hard all season. 

also there are tons of dogs on the ranch, gramps calls them "devil tornadoes". 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 01:16:23 PM
Dog pro-tip:  if your particular municipality requires that you register your dog, and thus pay a registration fee, you can pay some money on some website and get your dog to be certified as a service dog thereby eliminating that annual fee, which will save you money.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 01:18:26 PM
That seems dishonest
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 01:21:44 PM
It is dishonest.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 01:26:04 PM
i just don't register my dogs.  it's not like jackbooted thugs come searching the house.


i've definitely thought about getting some sort of service or therapy certification though, for travel.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 01:31:20 PM
I hadn't been registering my dogs, either, but somehow I got busted.  They're too old to do the service dog thing but I will with the next one.  I have a problem with paying a tax for which I receive no service. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 01:36:01 PM
I hadn't been registering my dogs, either, but somehow I got busted.

my god, that would make me so angry.  if someone turned you in, i hope you find out who it is and then have the satisfaction of having them die.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 01:36:41 PM
What do the registration fees pay for
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 01:37:34 PM
What do the registration fees pay for

jackbooted thugs to scour the city looking for lost dogs to kill and citizens to harass about leash laws.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 01:38:25 PM
or maybe just into general city or county funds.  i have no idea.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 01:48:51 PM
What do the registration fees pay for

jackbooted thugs to scour the city looking for lost dogs to kill and citizens to harass about leash laws.

It's this one.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 01:51:49 PM
I hadn't been registering my dogs, either, but somehow I got busted.

my god, that would make me so angry.  if someone turned you in, i hope you find out who it is and then have the satisfaction of having them die.

I was very angry.  Not really at the city or the fee or whatever, just that one of my neighbors was too chicken crap to come talk to me.  Also, what pissed me off second most, was that they said I had two dalmatians.  Which they very rough ridin' obviously are not.  Third most pissed me off, is that they think I would be stupid enough to have not one but two rough ridin' dalmatians.   Really the fee was like a distant ninth thing that pissed me off.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 02:01:34 PM
people are the worst.  what complete and giant assholes.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 18, 2015, 02:06:44 PM
manhattan does this too but i forget to do it. i dont care about the small fee, just doing anything like that is huge hassel that i must passively resist
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 18, 2015, 02:22:52 PM
I did not register my pup in mhk #scofflaw
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 18, 2015, 02:27:38 PM
You know what it was that got me busted?  Coyote poop.  A coyote pooped in my neighbor's yard and they submitted an online complaint because they thought it was my dogs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 02:27:40 PM
So this dog owner brought his dog to work but forgot his computer. It's lunchtime, and the dog us barking and wanting to run and piss all over the place. So guess who's taking it to the rough ridin' park? She's lucky it's a nice day.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 02:42:06 PM
So this dog owner brought his dog to work but forgot his computer. It's lunchtime, and the dog us barking and wanting to run and piss all over the place. So guess who's taking it to the rough ridin' park? She's lucky it's a nice day.

got back from the walk, owner was back in the office. "Oh, I didn't even know she was gone!" he says. :blank:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on November 18, 2015, 02:43:24 PM
pic of the pup please
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on November 18, 2015, 02:45:04 PM
having a dog available to walk is a great office amenity.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on November 18, 2015, 02:50:37 PM
mich is falling in love with this dog before our eyes
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on November 18, 2015, 02:53:51 PM
mich is falling in love with this dog before our eyes

she's lucky she didn't crap on our walk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on November 18, 2015, 02:55:20 PM
it's not like you would have to clean it up in that moribund city
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 08:41:55 AM
I bet the people at your work are posting on various other blogs about how someone they work with drives a nutless beamer with a broken window and having a hearty blog lol over it
(http://i.imgur.com/5H5Jdgr.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 20, 2015, 08:44:37 AM
Did you stop at dd for a breakfast sandwich? They are pretty tasty!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 08:47:42 AM
Did you stop at dd for a breakfast sandwich? They are pretty tasty!
i took that at like 5pm. and no. daylight doughnuts is next door and they are superior
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 20, 2015, 08:52:08 AM
Not in breakfast sandwich quality.

Also how strange is it that T-town has like 3 doughnut places like on the same block. Spread out you weirdos
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 08:54:17 AM
Not in breakfast sandwich quality.

Also how strange is it that T-town has like 3 doughnut places like on the same block. Spread out you weirdos
yeah that is weird. also there has been a no right turn onto gage right by that picture for 4 days and nerry a single thing has been worked on. just cones.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on November 20, 2015, 09:24:36 AM
Not in breakfast sandwich quality.

Also how strange is it that T-town has like 3 doughnut places like on the same block. Spread out you weirdos
yeah that is weird. also there has been a no right turn onto gage right by that picture for 4 days and nerry a single thing has been worked on. just cones.

Pretty sure they did that just to troll the travelling public.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 09:25:23 AM
Not in breakfast sandwich quality.

Also how strange is it that T-town has like 3 doughnut places like on the same block. Spread out you weirdos
yeah that is weird. also there has been a no right turn onto gage right by that picture for 4 days and nerry a single thing has been worked on. just cones.

Pretty sure they did that just to troll the travelling public.
nope denied. this town is garbage and thats all there is to it
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on November 20, 2015, 10:18:44 AM
Man that pic reminds me I haven't been to Speck's in a couple of years.  Good times.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2015, 10:24:51 AM
Did you stop at dd for a breakfast sandwich? They are pretty tasty!
i took that at like 5pm. and no. daylight doughnuts is next door and they are superior

how did you know which dd he was talking about?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2015, 10:25:20 AM
also, osage county!  :eek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 10:37:19 AM
Did you stop at dd for a breakfast sandwich? They are pretty tasty!
i took that at like 5pm. and no. daylight doughnuts is next door and they are superior

how did you know which dd he was talking about?
i was right next to it?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2015, 11:06:20 AM
if you were right next to it, and the other one is right next door, then you were right next to both, no?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on November 20, 2015, 11:55:46 AM
if you were right next to it, and the other one is right next door, then you were right next to both, no?
daylight is further west i was just passed it. And nobody calls daylight donoughts "dd"
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 20, 2015, 12:44:49 PM
Probably not hilarious but I've seen several huge dead cockroaches.  Ugh.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 20, 2015, 02:03:11 PM

Probably not hilarious but I've seen several huge dead cockroaches.  Ugh.
pics please. Lay a coin next to them.


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 20, 2015, 02:05:18 PM
(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/11/20/175da6b0d2f9fee673aa4c17066796e5.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on November 20, 2015, 02:13:14 PM
I would have applied for about 20 different jobs just today. :barf:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on November 20, 2015, 02:34:41 PM
good grief, that cockroach is the biggest insect i have ever seen, assuming that black thing is a floppy disk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 20, 2015, 03:00:17 PM
COIN!!!!


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on November 20, 2015, 03:06:52 PM
Dobber us millennials don't carry cash, let alone worthless metal discs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on November 20, 2015, 03:16:01 PM
A car key


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 20, 2015, 03:40:43 PM
I'm pretty sure I have never taken that placeholder SIM card out of my laptop
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 24, 2015, 11:47:45 AM
My chair shocks me at least twice a day, it's pretty hilarious :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 24, 2015, 12:05:04 PM
The tech guy called the sd card a sim card
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on November 24, 2015, 12:41:23 PM
I never said I was good at hardware
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 02, 2015, 07:17:11 PM
did I mention we're in a shared space with other companies? Another company came by to mention one of the dogs took a crap by their area
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 02, 2015, 07:18:44 PM
take a picture of the area.  i'm having a hard time understanding.  like, basically no walls at all separating businesses?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 02, 2015, 07:19:59 PM
I had 19 tabs open today  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 02, 2015, 07:23:29 PM
did I mention we're in a shared space with other companies? Another company came by to mention one of the dogs took a crap by their area

deny everything.  demand to see their toddlers.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 02, 2015, 09:22:38 PM
take a picture of the area.  i'm having a hard time understanding.  like, basically no walls at all separating businesses?
Well, there are offices on the exterior walls surrounding an open area in the center that has a lot of tables and chairs. The offices are filled with a few different companies and the center is free workspace with a couple companies having people there all the time. I'm pretty sure the dog took a crap next to the table where one of the companies worked, but it's quite possible they went into one of the offices to take a crap because they go in and out and dig in everyone's thrash as they please.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 02, 2015, 09:26:14 PM
Sounds very silicon valley'y
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 03, 2015, 03:46:25 PM
from the office manager:

Quote
?Now that we have 5 little canine buddies in our midst, we must require them to stay with their master/mistress at all times, on a leash if need be.

We are learning that not everyone thinks its cool for dogs to be roaming freely in the work place.

?Be sure to walk your dog regularly, as we have had too many carpet mishaps -- I suspect they were just marking their territory or simply making nervous mistakes -- Other trouble comes when the dogs scavenge the trash cans -- particularly after lunch. You don't want your dog eating chocolate bars and leftover chili.

Keeping your dog with you should stop these incidents.

So Kugel, Ellie, Alta, Zeus and the occasional dachshund -- my apologies for your new restrictions.

We're just trying to keep you in check and on your best behavior.

Love and licks,

The Management

:lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 03, 2015, 03:49:40 PM
oh no!   :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 03, 2015, 03:51:36 PM
Ellie is a good dog name
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 03, 2015, 03:54:07 PM
is a female dog owner really called a mistress?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 03, 2015, 04:28:16 PM
handlers are sometimes referred to as master/mistress.  it's very slightly archaic (but way better than referring to the owner as the dog's mother or father).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KCFDcat on December 03, 2015, 04:34:02 PM
handlers are sometimes referred to as master/mistress.  it's very slightly archaic (but way better than referring to the owner as the dog's mother or father).
This needs to go in the pet peeve thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 03, 2015, 04:37:04 PM
it is a huge pet peeve (@ whoever that pun poster is).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 03, 2015, 04:38:51 PM
He's got finals so I think you're out of luck
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 03, 2015, 04:40:19 PM
I am absolutely my dogs dad (not father).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 03, 2015, 04:46:28 PM
i'm my dogs' slave owner.  but to each their own.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on December 03, 2015, 05:05:10 PM
Invalid Tweet ID
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on December 03, 2015, 05:44:13 PM
I don't know how to describe myself in relation to my dog. To me, this dog is just like this jackass that I live with.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 03, 2015, 06:59:50 PM
I am absolutely my dogs dad (not father).

yes.

my parents are also grandma and grandpa
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on December 03, 2015, 07:15:34 PM
from the office manager:

Quote
?Now that we have 5 little canine buddies in our midst, we must require them to stay with their master/mistress at all times, on a leash if need be.

We are learning that not everyone thinks its cool for dogs to be roaming freely in the work place.

?Be sure to walk your dog regularly, as we have had too many carpet mishaps -- I suspect they were just marking their territory or simply making nervous mistakes -- Other trouble comes when the dogs scavenge the trash cans -- particularly after lunch. You don't want your dog eating chocolate bars and leftover chili.

Keeping your dog with you should stop these incidents.

So Kugel, Ellie, Alta, Zeus and the occasional dachshund -- my apologies for your new restrictions.

We're just trying to keep you in check and on your best behavior.

Love and licks,

The Management

:lol:


does this mean you can't post pictures of the sky from the  balcony anymore :frown:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on December 03, 2015, 07:20:18 PM

I don't know how to describe myself in relation to my dog. To me, this dog is just like this jackass that I live with.

Yea this.  I feel like this dog is my wife's loser cousin or nephew I can't kick out.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 04, 2015, 08:51:38 AM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

"Yes." 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 04, 2015, 08:55:55 AM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

"Yes."

So they are adoptive brothers.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 04, 2015, 09:03:08 AM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

"Yes."

So they are adoptive brothers.

I prefer to think of them as employees, and they are each other's colleagues/teammates.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 07, 2015, 02:25:43 PM
There is a Golden Doodle in my office right now. (That's a dog.)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on December 07, 2015, 02:29:49 PM
Some lady's phone just went off at full blast for a good 20-30 seconds and the ringtone was some sort of Jesus-y rock song.  The last 10 seconds of it was her going "Uh sorry.....sorry everyone.....just a second.....how do I....."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on December 07, 2015, 02:41:36 PM
Some lady's phone just went off at full blast for a good 20-30 seconds and the ringtone was some sort of Jesus-y rock song.  The last 10 seconds of it was her going "Uh sorry.....sorry everyone.....just a second.....how do I....."
not hilarious
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 07, 2015, 02:43:14 PM
There is a Golden Doodle in my office right now. (That's a dog.)

what a great perk.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 07, 2015, 02:44:17 PM
i petted a dutch shepherd in my office.  a nice young dog.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 07, 2015, 02:48:05 PM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

when people call my dogs brother/sister, i always want to rebut them by pointing out that they're prolly gonna eff at some point.  i don't though, because i'm semi-socially appropriate.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 07, 2015, 02:53:12 PM
 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 07, 2015, 04:08:42 PM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

when people call my dogs brother/sister, i always want to rebut them by pointing out that they're prolly gonna eff at some point.  i don't though, because i'm semi-socially appropriate.

omg.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 07, 2015, 04:11:37 PM
People always ask if my dogs are brothers, I say no they are from different litters/sire/dam.  Then they get all confused, "but they live together right?"

when people call my dogs brother/sister, i always want to rebut them by pointing out that they're prolly gonna eff at some point.  i don't though, because i'm semi-socially appropriate.

omg.

Should have named his dogs Cersei and Jaime.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 07, 2015, 04:12:08 PM
Some lady's phone just went off at full blast for a good 20-30 seconds and the ringtone was some sort of Jesus-y rock song.  The last 10 seconds of it was her going "Uh sorry.....sorry everyone.....just a second.....how do I....."
not hilarious

one time I was in a meeting browsing instagram and had my volume on full blast and I scrolled onto a a video a guy took at a forumla 1 race. :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on December 07, 2015, 04:37:27 PM
seems more scary than hilaro
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 09, 2015, 02:24:02 PM
Goddamnit you guys.(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/12/09/faf3a47f36628ab59b52b6a8e3d62b00.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 09, 2015, 02:24:25 PM
Seriously someone has got to be importing these things.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 09, 2015, 03:03:58 PM
That's gross, not hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 09, 2015, 03:26:53 PM
Emo, you realize it is very likely/possible for your boss's roach problem to be imported to Casa de Emo, right?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 09, 2015, 03:39:44 PM
Roaches in the casa del 'Mo would be a catastrophe!  I would blame it on the cleaning ladies. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 09, 2015, 05:44:36 PM
that's rough ridin' disgusting. I would just walk out if I saw that
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 06:48:49 PM
owners out in the common space/wandering, locking their dogs in the too small office. it smells and is crowded in here.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 06:51:57 PM
now they (dogs) are fighting/playing and being really loud and stinky.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 06:58:01 PM
99% chance that known dog-hater michigancat is making this up.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 07:00:52 PM
we're expected to keep them in the office if we go out to say, get a drink of water or go to the bathroom. Owners don't help.

Earlier today the dogs were fighting over a piece of cardboard. Owner takes it, puts it into short trash can, leaves the room. Dogs immediately grab the cardboard out of the trash, start fighting/chewing over it. Second owner looks confused when someone comments over it, picks it up, and puts it back in the same trash can. Dogs immediately grab it. michigancat takes it and puts it into the real trash so they can destroy something that won't make a mess that their owners will ignore. *sigh*
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 07:01:43 PM
oh and one of the dogs peed in the common area today, the other was eating cheese off the counter in the break room. both dogs have been locked in the office for about an hour with no contact from their owners
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 07:02:51 PM
Oh and one of the owners was complaining about the new rules about not letting their dogs run free.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 09, 2015, 07:11:36 PM
the west coast is a very interesting place
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 07:22:41 PM
cardboard is great for dogs to destroy.  i guess i don't understand what you're complaining about.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 07:32:25 PM
cardboard is great for dogs to destroy.  i guess i don't understand what you're complaining about.
Lots of chemicals to ingest, plus the mess
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 07:35:09 PM
now you're a veterinarian all of a sudden.   :jerk:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 07:36:57 PM
now you're a veterinarian all of a sudden.   :jerk:
I'm just getting information from a California dad (not dog owner) worried about chemicals in everyday objects (cardboard).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 07:37:53 PM
californians are idiots, michigancat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 09, 2015, 07:40:25 PM
i go back and forth on the michigancat work dog hijinx. half the time i think it's hilarity that would add to a work day and i'd just smdh at the absurdity of it all and half of the time i think it'd be kind of annoying.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 09, 2015, 07:40:51 PM
Leave some grapes and chocolate laying around the office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 09, 2015, 07:45:30 PM
that will just cause liquid poops
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 08:15:24 PM
i go back and forth on the michigancat work dog hijinx. half the time i think it's hilarity that would add to a work day and i'd just smdh at the absurdity of it all and half of the time i think it'd be kind of annoying.
It's a definite mix. It's less funny when they are locked in my office directly behind my desk and the owners are awol. When the dogs are taking dumps on the other side of the building or digging in another company's trash while they're on the phone, it's pretty hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 08:18:42 PM
Leave some grapes and chocolate laying around the office.
Whenever I leave the office and the owners aren't in there with them, I'm tempted to just set them free to run around all day and piss wherever they want in the common area. It shouldn't be my job to confine them. But everyone else seems to think it is their job to keep them confined so I would look like a jerk if I deliberately let them free.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 08:21:49 PM
they were born free, michigancat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Saulbadguy on December 09, 2015, 08:22:30 PM
 :surprised:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 09, 2015, 08:22:49 PM
I know you already described the office situation but when you say they are in the office with you unsupervised, are they in like a 15 x 15 room with just you or do you mean they are in the office area of your whole company?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 09, 2015, 08:32:05 PM
I know you already described the office situation but when you say they are in the office with you unsupervised, are they in like a 15 x 15 room with just you or do you mean they are in the office area of your whole company?

honestly mcat, we're all going to need video of your office situ before any of us can give an honest opinion.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 09, 2015, 08:34:49 PM
i think we can make pretty accurate assumptions based on what we know about michigancat and what we know about dogs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 09, 2015, 08:38:41 PM
I work at the owners house. We office in his basement.  He has a dog and 4 cats and the entire basement, except my office, smells like you would think a room that has four cats in it would smell. 

Some animal interaction in the office is great, but once the line is crossed it's super unproductive and sets ppl on edge, both are opposite of what employers want out of it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 09, 2015, 08:38:45 PM

I know you already described the office situation but when you say they are in the office with you unsupervised, are they in like a 15 x 15 room with just you

I will draw a map and maybe take photos tomorrow, but you are pretty much accurate. it's just the 15x15 room seats 6 and opens to a shared common space. Very crowded.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 09, 2015, 08:40:15 PM
I work at the owners house. We office in his basement.  He has a dog and 4 cats and the entire basement, except my office, smells like you would think a room that has four cats in it would smell. 

Some animal interaction in the office is great, but once the line is crossed it's super unproductive and sets ppl on edge, both are opposite of what employers want out of it.

if you are working in some guys basement i'm not sure the pets should be a huge issue.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 09, 2015, 08:42:37 PM
It's tenant finished as an office.  I am not working next to the water heater and furnace or anything.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 09, 2015, 08:44:58 PM
It's tenant finished as an office.  I am not working next to the water heater and furnace or anything.

still seems weird. how has this not come up before?

"hey cns, i'm going to go upstairs and do some dishes and then take a quick shower. can you follow up with tim on the johnson account? thanks bud."
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on December 09, 2015, 08:46:32 PM
Christmas party this Saturday, guys! :party:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 09, 2015, 08:47:04 PM
i mean living/working in someones basement is like a requirement or something here right
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 09, 2015, 08:52:15 PM
It's tenant finished as an office.  I am not working next to the water heater and furnace or anything.

still seems weird. how has this not come up before?

"hey cns, i'm going to go upstairs and do some dishes and then take a quick shower. can you follow up with tim on the johnson account? thanks bud."
:dunno:

Pretty good separation.  I mean, no dishes during work is something you establish early.  Also, separate entrances, etc.  It's pretty great, though.  The kitchen, grill, etc is all a set of stairs away.  It's like working from home, after a while.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on December 09, 2015, 08:57:19 PM
It's like working from home, after a while.

if your home is somebodies basement and you own 4 cats and a dog.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 09, 2015, 08:58:47 PM
It's like working from home, after a while.

if your home is somebodies basement and you own 4 cats and a dog.
In a year, it will be in my basement sans cats.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 09, 2015, 09:00:50 PM
that picture CNS posted like 2 years ago of his desk on blocks with those free weights below it makes sense now.  if the sump pump goes out your office can never truly flood. genius
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 09, 2015, 09:05:55 PM
it's not that weird for a small business to be based out of a person's house (maybe it's just a construction thing tho).  the last company i worked at in mhk was based in the owners house for like 20 years before they expanded too much and had to build an office.  my current company was worked out of the owners garage and barn for 5-10 years before he got large enough for a big production building, then he started another business in his garage after that on the side and it's grown into another pretty successful business.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 09, 2015, 09:58:36 PM
My first real job my office was across the street from the main office, above an antique store.  I thought that was weird and found a better job.  No cockroaches tho. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 09, 2015, 10:18:50 PM
we had a fly in my office last week and everybody was freaking the eff out, i cant even imagine a cochroach(es)  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on December 09, 2015, 10:57:05 PM

Christmas party this Saturday, guys! :party:

oh man, i hope my gE-lurking coworker (previously mentioned elsewhere) will give a first hand account of how he broke his tibia, dislocated his shoulder, and took 19 stitches to the face at the company party last Saturday :users:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on December 10, 2015, 04:05:21 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 07:50:18 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal

You didn't expect to work with Japanese people in Japan?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 08:08:19 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal

so they do office stretches? bro of mine worked in Japan for several weeks and they had office stretches every morning  :pray:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 08:09:34 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal

so they do office stretches? bro of mine worked in Japan for several weeks and they had office stretches every morning  :pray:

We used to have office stretches when I worked at Boeing (in the U.S.). It was great.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 08:14:15 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal

so they do office stretches? bro of mine worked in Japan for several weeks and they had office stretches every morning  :pray:

We used to have office stretches when I worked at Boeing (in the U.S.). It was great.

that fascinates me. tell me more about this. was it organized? like the whole office together? was there a leader in front?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 08:21:41 AM
I work with like 75% Japanese people, which I didn't really expect. Will it be hilarious? Only time will reveal

so they do office stretches? bro of mine worked in Japan for several weeks and they had office stretches every morning  :pray:

We used to have office stretches when I worked at Boeing (in the U.S.). It was great.

that fascinates me. tell me more about this. was it organized? like the whole office together? was there a leader in front?

I worked in a big cubicle area with people from lots of different departments. So at 9:30am and at 2:30pm in a designated conference room, anyone who wanted to stretch could go. Only about 15-20 people (out of maybe 100? I'm not sure) went. There was a leader who lead us through the stretches for about 10-15 minutes.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 08:37:01 AM
so was this more of a time wasting thing or did you see value in the stretching?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 10, 2015, 08:50:11 AM
My work did the same thing as MG's (haha!) only it was in your own cube or just outside you cube.  There was a leader for each section of cubes I guess, or you could follow on a video conference.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 10, 2015, 08:57:05 AM
I worked in a warehouse once and we had stretching before shift and after the two breaks. We would form a big circle (35ish people) and the boss was the leader. It was mandatory too
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 09:01:09 AM
I worked in a warehouse once and we had stretching before shift and after the two breaks. We would form a big circle (35ish people) and the boss was the leader. It was mandatory too

i was supposed to lead that activity at my previous job.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 09:02:07 AM
so was this more of a time wasting thing or did you see value in the stretching?

It was nice to take a break from staring at a computer. And the stretching helped you not get so tired from just sitting there all day.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 09:02:33 AM
my god, this is all blowing my mind. i had no idea that was so widespread. I can tell you I'm not happy about this.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 09:03:35 AM
my god, this is all blowing my mind. i had no idea that was so widespread. I can tell you I'm not happy about this.

i refused to lead the intended activity. people could stretch if they wanted to. most of us discussed what bars we were headed to after the shift was over.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 10, 2015, 09:05:55 AM
AJ what kind of company, in what industry, do you work for?  Probably has as much to do with it as anything.  I'm gonna guess something like finance.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Chingon on December 10, 2015, 09:07:42 AM
sounds strange, do you have some office wide PA system or something?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 09:12:26 AM
my god, this is all blowing my mind. i had no idea that was so widespread. I can tell you I'm not happy about this.

i refused to lead the intended activity. people could stretch if they wanted to. most of us discussed what bars we were headed to after the shift was over.
Ugh, talk about a too-cool-for-schooler.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 09:17:24 AM
AJ what kind of company, in what industry, do you work for?  Probably has as much to do with it as anything.  I'm gonna guess something like finance.

Technology/Communications
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 09:18:33 AM
my god, this is all blowing my mind. i had no idea that was so widespread. I can tell you I'm not happy about this.

i refused to lead the intended activity. people could stretch if they wanted to. most of us discussed what bars we were headed to after the shift was over.
Ugh, talk about a too-cool-for-schooler.

yea, pretty much.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 10, 2015, 09:31:47 AM
my god, this is all blowing my mind. i had no idea that was so widespread. I can tell you I'm not happy about this.

i refused to lead the intended activity. people could stretch if they wanted to. most of us discussed what bars we were headed to after the shift was over.
Ugh, talk about a too-cool-for-schooler.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 09:49:29 AM
I like to picture Judy in Accounting wearing her nicest pantsuit doing a hip abductor stretch with the rest of the staff.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 10:16:30 AM
I think we did mostly arm stretches and maybe toe touches.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:03:05 AM
Here is the office:

(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/12/10/d4f13efc6cbea9128f2fbb25cfade4df.jpg)

Here is the common area:

(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/12/10/c6d04ad4447416d5f2cd6b1f07bb3941.jpg)

I was trapped in the office with two sixty pound dogs yesterday, one of which was a puppy without its owner around.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 11:06:32 AM
Yeah, that's ridiculous. When you are alone with them, you should "close" the door but "accidentally" not make it latch all the way. That is too confined of a space to expect you to share with a dog (whether the owner is there or not) unless the dog just lays under the owner's desk all day.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 11:15:31 AM
oh my god. eff that place.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:16:01 AM
oh my god. eff that place.

we're leaving at the end of the year, thankfully
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 11:18:50 AM
oh my god. eff that place.

we're leaving at the end of the year, thankfully

you should have left a long time ago, probably.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:19:31 AM
oh my god. eff that place.

we're leaving at the end of the year, thankfully

you should have left a long time ago, probably.
I knew it was temporary when I started. (Didn't know about the dogs though.)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 10, 2015, 11:19:39 AM
oh my god. eff that place.

we're leaving at the end of the year, thankfully

you should have left a long time ago, probably.

you also deal with other people way better than i do, so maybe not.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: dmartin on December 10, 2015, 11:28:43 AM
Are the dogs owners in your company, because if so, I would assume the dogs would be coming with you
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: GregKSU1027 on December 10, 2015, 11:30:50 AM
 :horrorsurprise:
Are the dogs owners in your company, because if so, I would assume the dogs would be coming with you
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 11:33:25 AM
there are no dogs in those photos, michigancat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:34:30 AM
Are the dogs owners in your company, because if so, I would assume the dogs would be coming with you


yes, but it will be our own, much larger space and they won't be confined to a tiny room
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:35:06 AM
there are no dogs in those photos, michigancat.

they aren't here yet.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on December 10, 2015, 11:37:06 AM
You know where dogs really stink up the place?  Caves
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 11:39:34 AM
there are no dogs in those photos, michigancat.

they aren't here yet.

:dubious:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 10, 2015, 11:40:10 AM
I bet you secretly like the dogs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:53:52 AM
there are no dogs in those photos, michigancat.

they aren't here yet.

:dubious:

it's a late arriving office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 10, 2015, 11:54:57 AM
I get open space but that's like middle school computer lab open space
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 11:56:19 AM
I get open space but that's like middle school computer lab open space

great commentary
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 10, 2015, 11:57:06 AM
:thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 10, 2015, 12:25:38 PM
Where are the cockroaches?  :confused:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 10, 2015, 12:44:28 PM
I can't imagine a less productive arrangement. Your enclosed area is about 1.5x the size of my solo office
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on December 10, 2015, 12:51:53 PM
Is that your elbow or mine I'm touching lol i can't tell because we are sitting in the same chair :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 10, 2015, 12:57:59 PM
What if one of them is the puni disgusting lunch guy and the ENTIRE company has to smell it  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: EMAWican on December 10, 2015, 01:32:19 PM
Maybe now would be a good time for a spin-off thread called "Slightly Depressing Things at Your Office".
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on December 10, 2015, 01:45:49 PM
There is a training program at my work that is mandatory for people to attend as part of the new hiring process, it involves visiting several sites during business hours.  The time missed is reported to HR for record keeping.

Some guy had been submitting at his work site that he was going to these training sessions on Friday afternoons and heading off for a long weekend.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on December 10, 2015, 02:01:02 PM

There is a training program at my work that is mandatory for people to attend as part of the new hiring process, it involves visiting several sites during business hours.  The time missed is reported to HR for record keeping.

Some guy had been submitting at his work site that he was going to these training sessions on Friday afternoons and heading off for a long weekend.
fired?


Gonna win 'em all!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on December 10, 2015, 02:04:33 PM

There is a training program at my work that is mandatory for people to attend as part of the new hiring process, it involves visiting several sites during business hours.  The time missed is reported to HR for record keeping.

Some guy had been submitting at his work site that he was going to these training sessions on Friday afternoons and heading off for a long weekend.
fired?


Gonna win 'em all!

I will report back!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WillieWatanabe on December 10, 2015, 03:10:48 PM
This is fascinating. Thanks for sharing michigancat.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 03:38:04 PM
have the dogs made it in for work yet?   :dubious:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 03:47:45 PM
have the dogs made it in for work yet?   :dubious:
Owner is in a conference room so he tied it to a table in the common room. :frown:

(http://images.tapatalk-cdn.com/15/12/10/f14671b06d2f89b67acd5b8850cd1012.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 10, 2015, 03:49:48 PM
Dew claws.  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Shooter Jones on December 10, 2015, 03:52:30 PM
Would try one of those office chairs out.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 03:55:59 PM
you should let that dog loose.  he does not look happy to be tied up.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 03:57:08 PM
you should let that dog loose.  he does not look happy to be tied up.

not my problem
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: yoga-like_abana on December 10, 2015, 03:58:35 PM
feed it a laxative and use his papers to clean it up and put it in his laptop bag
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on December 10, 2015, 04:04:07 PM
Smear some peanut butter on some of the guy's paperwork so the dog will eat it. Then laugh as he tells the boss that his dog ate his papers. :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 04:04:15 PM
She's barking now and everyone is trying to tell her to be quiet and the owner came out. Another company told us they were going to get on a call. Turns out the owner didn't tie her to the leg, he just abandoned her and someone else tied her up because she was running around and digging through trash.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 04:13:21 PM
sounds like child abuse.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 10, 2015, 04:14:27 PM
This is a powder keg.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 04:24:16 PM
sounds like child abuse.

it's a dog
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 04:38:36 PM
it's a dog

a dog whose father is abusing it (while coworkers watch in bemused apathy).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 04:39:47 PM
it's a dog

a dog whose father is abusing it (while coworkers watch in bemused apathy).
It's more of a slave/master situation.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 04:40:41 PM
shocking.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on December 10, 2015, 05:14:34 PM
Just was two floors down and the dog was loose and getting mounted by a labradoodle (of course no owner in sight).
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 10, 2015, 05:16:23 PM
Smear some peanut butter on some of the guy's paperwork so the dog will eat it. Then laugh as he tells the boss that his dog ate his papers. :lol:

Smear peanut butter to the under side of all the desks.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on December 10, 2015, 05:28:29 PM
Just was two floors down and the dog was loose and getting mounted by a labradoodle (of course no owner in sight).

this all seems wasted on you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on December 11, 2015, 08:46:36 AM
a dog just took a crap in our office  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on December 11, 2015, 09:07:15 AM
Christmas party this Saturday, guys! :party:

office holiday party tonight and you guessed it-it's being catered by q39
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: CNS on December 11, 2015, 09:09:51 AM
You guys work with some horribly bad ppl. 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on December 11, 2015, 09:40:27 AM
Labradoodles are the Caucasians of the dog world
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on December 11, 2015, 09:40:59 AM
Bonus fact: almost all dogs in Japan wear clothes
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 11, 2015, 09:48:19 AM
Bonus fact: almost all dogs in Japan wear clothes

Is that really true?  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on December 11, 2015, 09:49:38 AM
Yes,  but it's probably a winter thing
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on December 11, 2015, 09:50:05 AM
Bonus fact: almost all dogs in Japan wear clothes

i don't like to blaspheme but i just said "J C that's amazing" in my head
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on December 14, 2015, 01:31:59 PM
Some lady's phone just went off at full blast for a good 20-30 seconds and the ringtone was some sort of Jesus-y rock song.  The last 10 seconds of it was her going "Uh sorry.....sorry everyone.....just a second.....how do I....."


Same lady again, except this time it was a cheap sounding piano version of Ode To Joy and she was able to shut it off after less than 10 seconds.  She's making progress!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on December 16, 2015, 09:08:07 AM
My coworker's car got stolen last week when she was out of town for work. Her husband kept it running somewhere in prarie village, while he went inside to see his mom real quick. They found it yesterday in KCMO, while it was in a high speed chase with a cop.  :lol: They finally got him to pull over. I'll never undertsnad someone who steals a car and then hangs around town with it.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 16, 2015, 09:53:53 AM
Wacky how do you know the person driving it was the one that stole it?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on December 16, 2015, 09:57:42 AM
Wacky how do you know the person driving it was the one that stole it?
Good point. I don't, but why would they try and out run the cops?  :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 16, 2015, 10:12:07 AM
Wacky how do you know the person driving it was the one that stole it?
Good point. I don't, but why would they try and out run the cops?  :dunno:

I don't know, but I bet every person that had tried to outrun the cops was not driving a car that they had stolen themselves.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on December 16, 2015, 10:17:20 AM
Hmmm..... Where's Rick Daris when you need him?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 29, 2015, 01:13:46 PM
I went for an eye exam today. I went to the same office, but different doctor than usual. He had 2 dogs just laying on the floor chilling in the exam room.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 29, 2015, 01:28:53 PM
I went for an eye exam today. I went to the same office, but different doctor than usual. He had 2 dogs just laying on the floor chilling in the exam room.

You sure it was two dogs?  Not just some double vision or something?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 29, 2015, 01:29:52 PM
I went for an eye exam today. I went to the same office, but different doctor than usual. He had 2 dogs just laying on the floor chilling in the exam room.

You sure it was two dogs?  Not just some double vision or something?

One was black and one was light yellow. Also, my eyes are in very good health. I even got to look at a picture of the back of my eyeballs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 29, 2015, 02:02:53 PM
I went for an eye exam today. I went to the same office, but different doctor than usual. He had 2 dogs just laying on the floor chilling in the exam room.

You sure it was two dogs?  Not just some double vision or something?

One was black and one was light yellow. Also, my eyes are in very good health. I even got to look at a picture of the back of my eyeballs.

Gut reaction, looking at the back of one's own eyeballs should probably be illegal.  What if it disrupted the space-time continuum?  Not worth the risk, IMO.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on December 29, 2015, 02:23:12 PM
I went for an eye exam today. I went to the same office, but different doctor than usual. He had 2 dogs just laying on the floor chilling in the exam room.

You sure it was two dogs?  Not just some double vision or something?

One was black and one was light yellow. Also, my eyes are in very good health. I even got to look at a picture of the back of my eyeballs.

Gut reaction, looking at the back of one's own eyeballs should probably be illegal.  What if it disrupted the space-time continuum?  Not worth the risk, IMO.
Shouldn't that be covered up... at least in public.  :surprised:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 29, 2015, 02:26:08 PM
They take the picture through your eyeball...like from the front.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on December 29, 2015, 02:28:00 PM
They take the picture through your eyeball...like from the front.
This is not a pleasant picture in my mind.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on December 29, 2015, 02:30:48 PM
They take the picture through your eyeball...like from the front.
This is not a pleasant picture in my mind.

Do you not know how eyes work?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on December 29, 2015, 02:33:48 PM
Here's basically what mine looked like.(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ16MJr6Lyfv2Pj-Jgg5d8gX5UfgST4ok3Cf-wQXf8J3DTbP4rl)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on December 29, 2015, 03:59:45 PM
Gross
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on December 29, 2015, 04:04:57 PM
You do know you're not supposed to look directly into your own eye, right?  It can cause blindness.  Droste effect or something.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on January 26, 2016, 03:24:44 PM
we're in the new office! Bad dog owner's dog likes to pee on the deck. He (owner, not dog) is currently using a second chair to prop up his feet. Wouldn't be a big deal, except he's in socks, and it's at the table where everyone eats lunch.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on January 26, 2016, 03:34:38 PM
we're in the new office! Bad dog owner's dog likes to pee on the deck. He (owner, not dog) is currently using a second chair to prop up his feet. Wouldn't be a big deal, except he's in socks, and it's at the table where everyone eats lunch.
I would just murder this guy where he sits if i worked there.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: meow meow on January 26, 2016, 03:40:16 PM
we're in the new office! Bad dog owner's dog likes to pee on the deck. He (owner, not dog) is currently using a second chair to prop up his feet. Wouldn't be a big deal, except he's in socks, and it's at the table where everyone eats lunch.
I would just murder this guy where he sits if i worked there.

that's probably the worst place you could murder this guy, assuming you don't want to get caught
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on February 05, 2016, 03:37:38 PM
It's getting rough ridin' ridiculous.  Is Quik Trip hiring?

(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160205/79b6775878c9f347aee9f9f1da41674c.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on February 05, 2016, 06:49:29 PM
menudo?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on February 05, 2016, 07:01:03 PM
menudo?
Looks like he upgraded crockpots. This is an oster maybe?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: bucket on February 14, 2016, 10:43:41 PM
One of my coworkers is a single mom so she brings the kid in when we have meetings after work. The kid usually uses my computer/desk while we're in meetings. 2-3 weeks ago, I see the kid playing with my stapler for some reason. I don't think much of it then find my stapler is broken the next morning. Last week I brought in some bomb red velvet cookies to snack on during the work day. After our evening work meeting the mom informs me her kid had eaten them.

Why does this kid have it out for me?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on February 14, 2016, 10:53:58 PM
You have meetings outside of business hours?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: bucket on February 14, 2016, 11:00:29 PM
You have meetings outside of business hours?

Work committee
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on February 15, 2016, 08:38:12 AM
Pink eye :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on February 15, 2016, 08:40:21 AM
One of my coworkers is a single mom so she brings the kid in when we have meetings after work. The kid usually uses my computer/desk while we're in meetings. 2-3 weeks ago, I see the kid playing with my stapler for some reason. I don't think much of it then find my stapler is broken the next morning. Last week I brought in some bomb red velvet cookies to snack on during the work day. After our evening work meeting the mom informs me her kid had eaten them.

Why does this kid have it out for me?

Why can't the kid use his mom's desk?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: kslim on February 15, 2016, 08:43:21 AM
Pink eye :sdeek:
eff that, go home. And if they try to make you take pto let the hro rep know its an unsafe work environment
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: bucket on February 15, 2016, 12:32:13 PM
One of my coworkers is a single mom so she brings the kid in when we have meetings after work. The kid usually uses my computer/desk while we're in meetings. 2-3 weeks ago, I see the kid playing with my stapler for some reason. I don't think much of it then find my stapler is broken the next morning. Last week I brought in some bomb red velvet cookies to snack on during the work day. After our evening work meeting the mom informs me her kid had eaten them.

Why does this kid have it out for me?

Why can't the kid use his mom's desk?

Her mom works in a different building. Committee meetings are held in my building. I'm the only committee member with an office in the building so I let her use it to keep her entertained. It beats having her in the meeting.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on March 11, 2016, 02:19:35 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/orucSnn.jpg)

 :Keke:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on March 11, 2016, 02:22:05 PM
My boss just used the word "incestual" three times in a conversation.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Brock Landers on March 11, 2016, 02:39:15 PM
Yeah real mature, lib.



jk man that's funny   :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on March 11, 2016, 04:18:58 PM

Quote from: Somebody at Mrs. Gooch's Worklink=topic=27807.msg1536343#msg1536343 date=1457727725
I work with a biker chick. She does that motorcycle wave, too!


Gonna win 'em all! (using Tapatalk)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on March 24, 2016, 10:42:15 AM
I just made a coworker measure my hair. He then suggested I get it corn-rowed.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on March 24, 2016, 10:46:23 AM
I just made a coworker measure my hair. He then suggested I get it corn-rowed.

That takes way too long.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on March 24, 2016, 10:50:02 AM
I just made a coworker measure my hair. He then suggested I get it corn-rowed.

That takes way too long.

i wouldn't keep them in for very long, so i don't think i will pursue it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Katdaddy on March 24, 2016, 10:53:30 AM
I just made a coworker measure my hair. He then suggested I get it corn-rowed.

That takes way too long.

i wouldn't keep them in for very long, so i don't think i will pursue it.

Are you a black dude?  Cause white folks just get their's wheat-rowed... it's a Kansas thing, I think.  :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on March 24, 2016, 10:59:34 AM
I just made a coworker measure my hair. He then suggested I get it corn-rowed.

That takes way too long.

i wouldn't keep them in for very long, so i don't think i will pursue it.

Are you a black dude?  Cause white folks just get their's wheat-rowed... it's a Kansas thing, I think.  :D

don't talk to me.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: illBisonYourdele on April 12, 2016, 04:14:57 PM
just doing a little housekeeping on a former employees computer and found some interesting search history....to include: "looking for an erotic massage to completion for my wife"

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: bones129 on April 12, 2016, 07:54:47 PM
lol
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on April 12, 2016, 08:04:48 PM
Somebody needs to post a new picture so we don't see emo's office toilet when this thread is bumped :barf:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on April 28, 2016, 06:02:28 PM
more wtf than hilarious but this woman started in my department like 6 weeks ago.  i've said maybe 5 words to her in that time.  anyway she's sharing an office with the guy next door for the time being, but he was gone today.  so she has a work question and she comes to my office and asks me the question and i answer it and then she just stays there and starts small talking.  so i'm being friendly and hoping she stops soon but then she starts talking about how her chair is uncomfortable and then she says "i shouldn't say this, but it's making my butt (leans in and whispers) and other things (leans back and goes back to normal voice) numb.  i couldn't feel anything until like 7:30 last night"  then she started laughing and jokingly said not to tell hr on her.

 :dunno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on April 28, 2016, 06:59:27 PM
there are two random guys at the office speaking russian and none of the 8 people in my immediate vicinity has any idea who they are or what they are doing here. They're just hanging out on the patio.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Playboy X on April 28, 2016, 08:17:20 PM
more wtf than hilarious but this woman started in my department like 6 weeks ago.  i've said maybe 5 words to her in that time.  anyway she's sharing an office with the guy next door for the time being, but he was gone today.  so she has a work question and she comes to my office and asks me the question and i answer it and then she just stays there and starts small talking.  so i'm being friendly and hoping she stops soon but then she starts talking about how her chair is uncomfortable and then she says "i shouldn't say this, but it's making my butt (leans in and whispers) and other things (leans back and goes back to normal voice) numb.  i couldn't feel anything until like 7:30 last night"  then she started laughing and jokingly said not to tell hr on her.

 :dunno:

crap you shoulda told her i'd made her feel something, hit me up
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Chingon on April 28, 2016, 08:19:01 PM
more wtf than hilarious but this woman started in my department like 6 weeks ago.  i've said maybe 5 words to her in that time.  anyway she's sharing an office with the guy next door for the time being, but he was gone today.  so she has a work question and she comes to my office and asks me the question and i answer it and then she just stays there and starts small talking.  so i'm being friendly and hoping she stops soon but then she starts talking about how her chair is uncomfortable and then she says "i shouldn't say this, but it's making my butt (leans in and whispers) and other things (leans back and goes back to normal voice) numb.  i couldn't feel anything until like 7:30 last night"  then she started laughing and jokingly said not to tell hr on her.

 :dunno:

crap you shoulda told her i'd made her feel something, hit me up
Thank God a good poster like pbx is back.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on April 28, 2016, 10:54:05 PM
I've got a pretty great break room note to share soon
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on April 29, 2016, 11:27:51 AM
We're having our usual pot luck (at the end of every month) and our main admin asked me to run to the grocery store to grab a few extra things. Couple things to this story: She loves French onion dip and she's Jewish. So when I got to the dip section at price chopper, I notice they didn't have just regular French onion Dip. They had French onion Dip with bacon and French onion Dip light. I'm like: "I can't bring back the french onion dip light, they'll give me crap." So I grab the one with bacon. She can't have bacon. Whoops.  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on April 29, 2016, 11:33:56 AM
are you talking about sandwiches, wc08?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on April 29, 2016, 11:34:53 AM
oh, french onion dip
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on April 29, 2016, 11:35:22 AM
I think it's French dip dip
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on April 29, 2016, 11:36:52 AM
Yes, french onion dip. We're having wraps/sandwiches sys
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on April 29, 2016, 11:40:23 AM
Can she eat French dressing?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on April 29, 2016, 11:40:41 AM
We're having wraps/sandwiches sys

thank you.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 06, 2016, 11:13:33 AM
Our organization's aging staff constantly clicks on viruses.  So our Tech department decided to put a filter on any email that includes the word "click" in it to add a warning on the topic that says [potential virus]

they then sent out an email explaining this which triggered their own [potential virus] filter.

They then sent an additional email explaining why the filter was triggered, and triggered the filter again.

 :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: slobber on May 06, 2016, 11:16:12 AM
Our organization's aging staff constantly clicks on viruses.  So our Tech department decided to put a filter on any email that includes the word "click" in it to add a warning on the topic that says [potential virus]

they then sent out an email explaining this which triggered their own [potential virus] filter.

They then sent an additional email explaining why the filter was triggered, and triggered the filter again.

 :lol:
Sounds like the IT staff is aging as well!
 :D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 06, 2016, 11:16:54 AM
oh definitely, the IT guy looks like bernie sanders
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on May 06, 2016, 11:19:40 AM
that is amazing KK  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on May 06, 2016, 11:23:46 AM
:D
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 06, 2016, 11:26:28 AM
The IT guy should have just invited all of the aging employees to a conference call and explained it to them. Old people love phone calls.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 06, 2016, 11:31:17 AM
omg KK :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on May 06, 2016, 11:31:54 AM
hopefully it also triggered a secondary "everyone stop hitting reply all" avalanche as well
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on May 07, 2016, 08:31:15 PM
I said I had a good one

(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160508/9ed8db744e89730dba1f5a7405211fe1.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on May 09, 2016, 12:10:33 PM
Seems very passive aggressive. Why not just @ ever-y-body in the office?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 09, 2016, 01:01:48 PM
Not really hilarious, more like so sad that I am laughing.

We tried to use GoTo Meeting on Friday but the app is no longer supported because our operating system is too old. But there is a work around - you can use the web based version on Google Chrome....but we don't have Google Chrome on the conference room computer.  :facepalm:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Rage Against the McKee on May 09, 2016, 04:50:50 PM
Not really hilarious, more like so sad that I am laughing.

We tried to use GoTo Meeting on Friday but the app is no longer supported because our operating system is too old. But there is a work around - you can use the web based version on Google Chrome....but we don't have Google Chrome on the conference room computer.  :facepalm:

It would take about 10 seconds to put google chrome on the conference room computer.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 09, 2016, 05:07:32 PM
Not really hilarious, more like so sad that I am laughing.

We tried to use GoTo Meeting on Friday but the app is no longer supported because our operating system is too old. But there is a work around - you can use the web based version on Google Chrome....but we don't have Google Chrome on the conference room computer.  :facepalm:

It would take about 10 seconds to put google chrome on the conference room computer.

Well I am sure it would be more than 10 seconds and we needed to start the meeting right away.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 09, 2016, 05:16:21 PM
I said I had a good one

(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160508/9ed8db744e89730dba1f5a7405211fe1.jpg)

why don't you just put on the paper towels after you use the last one?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on May 09, 2016, 05:17:29 PM
Not really hilarious, more like so sad that I am laughing.

We tried to use GoTo Meeting on Friday but the app is no longer supported because our operating system is too old. But there is a work around - you can use the web based version on Google Chrome....but we don't have Google Chrome on the conference room computer.  :facepalm:

It would take about 10 seconds to put google chrome on the conference room computer.

I would not be surprised if an IT department still clinging to Windows XP does not grant its users admin rights to the conference room computer.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on May 09, 2016, 05:40:22 PM
Probably don't know how
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 09, 2016, 05:51:18 PM
IT department  :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 09, 2016, 06:43:15 PM
they won't let us put chrome on, i have to use ie wtf is that  :blindfold:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: wetwillie on May 09, 2016, 06:44:45 PM
they won't let us put chrome on, i have to use ie wtf is that  :blindfold:

That is brutal
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on May 09, 2016, 07:35:26 PM
I was in a big conference room meeting today. They needed help logging into the remote desktop thing. I knew how to do it, but I didn't say a word. Just sat there for ten minutes while they figured it out.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 09, 2016, 07:36:44 PM
good job
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: sys on May 09, 2016, 07:37:50 PM
that's what i do (mostly non-computer stuff) too.  if they wanted my help they'd have asked for it, i always think.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 11, 2016, 11:58:43 AM
Quote
IT has received some concerns about emails saying “Potential Virus”.
 
We have updated the system to help eliminate the spread of viruses throughout the company.  As always do not open emails from senders that are unknown or open links from unknown senders.

To prevent your emails from stating there may be a Potential Virus, you will have to avoid using the word “C1ick” anywhere in your emails.  (I used the number 1, so this email did not show up as “Potential Virus”)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 11, 2016, 12:06:55 PM
Quote
IT has received some concerns about emails saying “Potential Virus”.
 
We have updated the system to help eliminate the spread of viruses throughout the company.  As always do not open emails from senders that are unknown or open links from unknown senders.

To prevent your emails from stating there may be a Potential Virus, you will have to avoid using the word “C1ick” anywhere in your emails.  (I used the number 1, so this email did not show up as “Potential Virus”)

I bet hackers never use incorrect spellings to get around virus filters.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Kat Kid on May 11, 2016, 12:10:21 PM
It is spy vs. spy out here.  One innovation leads to another.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on May 11, 2016, 12:21:28 PM
It is spy vs. spy out here.  One innovation leads to another.

If Obama's Death Panels just would have panned out, all this innovation wouldn't be needed.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on May 13, 2016, 01:54:22 PM
Not in the office but there is a hilarious house flipper guy giving a seminar a couple of doors down from us. People pay money to sit thru crap like that?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on May 13, 2016, 02:22:28 PM
There is a guy in here on a millennials rant. :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dugout DickStone on May 13, 2016, 07:39:46 PM
There is a guy in here on a millennials rant. :lol:

Show him the thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on May 17, 2016, 05:04:51 PM
Bed bugs :sdeek: Not rough ridin' hilarious either.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 17, 2016, 05:05:56 PM
Bed bugs :sdeek: Not rough ridin' hilarious either.

You are in the wrong thread.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 18, 2016, 08:54:08 AM
Oh hi!

(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160518/545821338db1e03d1d3c4d43326af834.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 18, 2016, 08:55:59 AM
Bed bugs :sdeek: Not rough ridin' hilarious either.

I still have marks on my arm and scapula from bed bug bites back in January.  The ones in my arm actually caused a swelling that put pressure on the nerve and I was experience carpal tunnel like symptoms.  eff bed bugs.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 18, 2016, 09:05:06 AM
I came in on Saturday for a few hours and was the only one in the place and I heard this loud banging in a different office down the hall so I go to investigate and it's a bird that keeps slamming itself into the window. So odd.

Emos bird picture reminded me of it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 18, 2016, 09:09:56 AM
Same bird?  :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 18, 2016, 09:11:27 AM
Also we just hired a dude that used to play basketball for a regional D1 school.  Like 6'11".  I cringe every time I see him go through a doorway, but he does it so confidently, like he knows it's a 7'0" doorway and he's not going to hit his head.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on May 18, 2016, 09:24:28 AM
Look at these 9' beauties, I bet it'd make him feel like a short dude.

(http://i.imgur.com/sVVjeqY.jpg)

Also 7' doors are generally only 6'8"-6'10" clearance so you might want to investigate him for height fraud.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on May 18, 2016, 09:34:06 AM
I came in on Saturday for a few hours and was the only one in the place and I heard this loud banging in a different office down the hall so I go to investigate and it's a bird that keeps slamming itself into the window. So odd.

Emos bird picture reminded me of it.

I have to knock down birds' nests on a weekly basis outside of my office doors, otherwise they end up in the building. They've only invaded once since we moved, but the pandemonium was hilarious. Everything shut down immediately and the whole staff spent the better part of an hour trying to chase it out the back garage door.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on May 18, 2016, 09:38:13 AM
The internet says he's 6'10".  I'll try to get an accurate door measurement.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on May 20, 2016, 08:42:30 AM
So today we were having a meeting discussing possible contract engineers and someone suggested a guy with the last name of Snow. I really wanted to say "He knows nothing". But I didn't because I didn't think anyone in that meeting would get it.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: _33 on May 20, 2016, 08:51:03 AM
I definitely wouldn't have gotten it, but I don't go to meetings anymore so I wouldn't have been there anyway.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on August 11, 2016, 01:54:43 PM
There are people playing bags(tailgating game) in the office right now

:dubious:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on August 11, 2016, 02:00:04 PM
This dentist is really pissed we won't meet some of his demands on our offer and he's getting really shitty with us. So I seeked out my HR Director to explain a few things for him and why we could and couldn't change some of the verbiage (non-compete stuff). She sent a long email and then left at noon for vacation. This was the start of an email that he had written, after he got the auto-reply back from my HR Director. :lol:

Quote
How convenient for (insert directors name) to reply to an e-mail and then leave town! (insert new HR persons name), you will need to help out on this one. Thank-you!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on August 11, 2016, 02:13:39 PM
There are people playing bags(tailgating game) in the office right now

:dubious:

Sounds better than working.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Asteriskhead on August 11, 2016, 03:48:49 PM
had a three beer lunch with another company that we are working with today. one of the ladies from the other company had armpit hair longer than my beard!!!
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: AppleJack on August 11, 2016, 04:00:40 PM
someone wrote "White Castle Please" on a post-it on a vending machine at our office.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on September 22, 2016, 02:50:00 PM
When the boss uses the term "boundary layer" when he actually means "boundary condition". OMG!  :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on October 05, 2016, 03:40:23 PM
Quote from: architect
can you help us with a gang penetration?

 :sdeek:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 05, 2016, 03:49:20 PM
a guy is walking around in his socks and the dogs smell like wet dog
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 05, 2016, 03:51:35 PM
a guy is walking around in his socks and the dogs smell like wet dog

This does not sound hilarious.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 05, 2016, 03:53:44 PM
a guy is walking around in his socks and the dogs smell like wet dog

This does not sound hilarious.
this is the wrong thread I suppose
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 05, 2016, 04:01:51 PM
Maybe the grievance thread? 
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 05, 2016, 04:02:13 PM
Annoying things in your office thread
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 05, 2016, 04:05:19 PM
Yep that's what I was looking for
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on October 05, 2016, 04:24:17 PM
the wet sock guy should take off his socks and dry them in the office microwave (without using a plate) and then maybe hang them from the back of an unused chair to fully air dry
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 05, 2016, 04:42:32 PM
I take my shoes off in my office and sometimes I'll sneak out to the kitchen to get some water in my socks. I've never been caught and never had sock wetness either
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: meow meow on October 05, 2016, 05:35:46 PM
I take my shoes off in my office and sometimes I'll sneak out to the kitchen to get some water in my socks. I've never been caught and never had sock wetness either

that's v weird, stop doing that
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 05, 2016, 05:37:21 PM
It's only 10 ft
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 05, 2016, 07:59:45 PM
This guy's office is basically the kitchen (very open floor plan). Same guy also spent a thirty minute meeting sitting criss cross applesauce on a work table. So gross.
Title: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 05, 2016, 08:46:41 PM
Your work just sounds rough ridin' gross rusty
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: puniraptor on October 05, 2016, 08:57:32 PM
Same guy also spent a thirty minute meeting sitting criss cross applesauce on a work table. So gross.

this is grosserer and san franciscoier than anything
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Emo EMAW on October 06, 2016, 08:24:39 AM
I would not allow that my meeting.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: The Big Train on October 10, 2016, 02:36:40 PM
It's already full decorated with Halloween stuff.  There's several skeleton/grim reaper looking things hanging from the ceilings.  Gravestones and black kettles and creepy spiders everywhere.

It's pretty hilarious but also pretty scary :ohno:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on October 30, 2016, 11:50:24 PM
Office admin decided we should have a pumpkin carving contest tomorrow.   No idea how many people will participate thinking I will probably win with this entry.
(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161031/5656e4ef32d34989b976f03a0fc3ecd0.jpg)

Tom

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 30, 2016, 11:51:26 PM
God damn tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Gooch on October 31, 2016, 08:32:43 AM
Adults in costumes at work ever-y-where. :facepalm:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on October 31, 2016, 08:55:36 AM
Adults in costumes at work ever-y-where. :facepalm:

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 09:25:55 AM
Zero costumes at my work
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on October 31, 2016, 09:27:30 AM
A lot of fun haters in here. Sigh.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Dr Rick Daris on October 31, 2016, 10:55:31 AM
Office admin decided we should have a pumpkin carving contest tomorrow.   No idea how many people will participate thinking I will probably win with this entry.
(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161031/5656e4ef32d34989b976f03a0fc3ecd0.jpg)

Tom

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

wow
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 31, 2016, 10:56:34 AM
I wish I worked at a place where people dressed up for Halloween.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on October 31, 2016, 11:27:50 AM
(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161031/e5431fc115294e9a7176825e459139ea.jpg)

Tom

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: hatingfrancisco on October 31, 2016, 11:41:51 AM
Not winning.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 11:49:29 AM
That guy is cheating using two pumpkins, call him out on it tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on October 31, 2016, 11:50:23 AM
The brain is amazing.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on October 31, 2016, 02:28:33 PM
That guy is cheating using two pumpkins, call him out on it tom
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on October 31, 2016, 03:00:30 PM
never pegged Tom for a plaza gig
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat on October 31, 2016, 03:01:20 PM
also never pegged Tom to own a pumpkin carving machine/robot
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: michigancat on October 31, 2016, 03:03:40 PM
the one just to the left of Tom's looks intriguing
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on October 31, 2016, 03:11:10 PM
never pegged Tom for a plaza gig

tom and pete may be co-workers #encounters?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on October 31, 2016, 03:53:18 PM
Took home the trophy this year!!!(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161031/ae5744911d6e0f0eeea3b2ed2c8fefcd.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 03:58:01 PM
never pegged Tom for a plaza gig

tom and pete may be co-workers #encounters?

This would be a fantastic story
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on October 31, 2016, 05:24:08 PM
That guy is cheating using two pumpkins, call him out on it tom
The guy was a gal, and she won.  I protested the double pumpkin violation.   Me and my Dremel out done by a set of sculptures tools.


Tom

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 05:25:25 PM
I should have known. I could definitely see Mrs gooch cheating like that
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on October 31, 2016, 06:44:04 PM
totally a mrs gooch move
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on October 31, 2016, 06:50:47 PM
classic mrs chode
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 31, 2016, 06:57:23 PM
Did the rules actually say you could only use one pumpkin?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 06:59:07 PM
we're talking about integrity here, mrs gooch
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on October 31, 2016, 07:03:14 PM
One person used a hat to decorate their pumpkin. What's the difference between using a hat or a small pumpkin as a decoration on your pumpkin?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on October 31, 2016, 07:12:34 PM
well, it's another pumpkin... that's one difference
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: pissclams on October 31, 2016, 07:18:26 PM
wow, today i learned that a hat is different than a pumpkin.  class dismissed for the day folks.  go candy huntin'
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: chum1 on October 31, 2016, 07:35:59 PM
If there was a rule against using more than one pumpkin, I would have declared the sculpture tools gal the winner in spite of it because that brain is rough ridin' cool.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: KST8FAN on October 31, 2016, 08:59:53 PM
Took home the trophy this year!!!(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161031/ae5744911d6e0f0eeea3b2ed2c8fefcd.jpg)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
WC

So what was the contest?

Tom

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: WackyCat08 on October 31, 2016, 09:02:04 PM
Best costume and then best group theme contest. I went as the tooth fairy (job related) and wore a blue man suit, with a tutu, wig, wand, etc. it was ridiculous.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on October 31, 2016, 09:37:16 PM
(http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20161101/75ea4197243611a61377c4230c73daa1.jpg)
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 09, 2016, 01:50:34 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/1APYnvx.jpg)

 :confused:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on November 09, 2016, 02:46:07 PM
not pictured: dry penis mills
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mrs. Gooch on November 09, 2016, 03:01:25 PM
not pictured: dry penis mills

That where they make those dog chew stick things, right?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Tobias on November 09, 2016, 03:06:40 PM
:thumbs:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: Mikeyis4dcats on November 09, 2016, 04:35:37 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/1APYnvx.jpg)

 :confused:

you gonna bid the erection on that?
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: libliblibliblibliblib on November 09, 2016, 04:40:43 PM
Already bid, it's down to 4 and they issued a post bid addendum with no clouds  :jerk:
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mhkpasa on November 09, 2016, 07:20:56 PM
 :cheers: Bluebeam
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: XocolateThundarr on November 09, 2016, 08:18:33 PM
:cheers: Bluebeam

I too enjoy this software.
Title: Re: Hilarious Things At Your Office
Post by: mocat