I don't know where this belongs, BUT OMG MAKE IT STOP....
Boss man is gone this morning and 4 of my coworkers (all females) are gathered together in the corner 2 cubes over talking about bad sex. Apparently one of them hooked up with a guy for the first time last night and not only did this guy not know what he was doing, but he also had a really small package. Apparently this guy has to walk the plank now and now all the girls feel like they should share their awful experiences and all the small weiners they have seen. They're using awkward analogies too... "Like, I've seen a movie before and thought it was bad, but I went back to rewatch it again and i found a place where I could enjoy it" etc.
LIKE OMG MAKE IT STOP NOW!!!