Author Topic: The Big V (vasectomy) thread--for grown-up 'Cat fans ONLY. (No GPCing allowed.)  (Read 6392 times)

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Offline Matt Mckee

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

I would go with a puppy.  You can leave them home alone sooner. 

Offline Matt Mckee

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The whole "doc approving it" thing makes me want to hurt someone.  You can have a doc shove plastic balloons inside a high school girl's chest and call it a graduation gift from her parents, but you can't take surgery as a form of birth control unless the doc understands your sitch.  That is just absolute bullshit.

I didn't remember this until now, but I did have to have my wife sign something stating she knew what I was doing and agreed to it.  Like it is against the law if a guy would get snipped and not tell his wife.  WTF?

Urologists and general surgeons are not cut from the same cloth as cosmetic surgeons.  You could find a doctor who would not care about your situation and perform a vasectomy but you'd have to look around.

Offline Brock Landers

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The whole "doc approving it" thing makes me want to hurt someone.  You can have a doc shove plastic balloons inside a high school girl's chest and call it a graduation gift from her parents, but you can't take surgery as a form of birth control unless the doc understands your sitch.  That is just absolute bullshit.

I didn't remember this until now, but I did have to have my wife sign something stating she knew what I was doing and agreed to it.  Like it is against the law if a guy would get snipped and not tell his wife.  WTF?

Gronkzongas on a young lady are a beautiful thing, whereas having your balls operated on sounds absolutely terrifying.  Apologies if I crossed the GPC line.

Offline Asteriskhead

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

I would go with a puppy.  You can leave them home alone sooner.

That was a royal "I". Like, if I ever get married and my partner wants to raise a kid. I'm not against the idea, there are just plenty of reasons I don't want it to be my own offspring (which is unfortunate because I'm fairly intelligent and good looking).

Offline steve dave

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I've done this to over a million baby cows and medium sized cows. if you need this done I can do this for almost no charge. I keep my chompers (< that's a technical word for the primary tool used) in a 5 gallon bucket of hot soapy blue water in between chomps so there is no risk of infection. there is some cow poop basically all over everything everywhere so just watch what you touch. we have this deal that can squeeze you super tight so you don't jerk around if you are worried about flinching when I engage the chomps.

Offline steve dave

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.

Offline slobber

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

Offline Stevesie60

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

Let me know where to find them. TIA.

Offline Bloodfart

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@dobber South east Reno county.

Offline EllRobersonisInnocent

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Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

Let me know where to find them. TIA.

I'm still trying to get Lil'ERiI for you

Offline The Tonya Harding of Twitter Users Creep

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these threads are really only fun when you can GPC them up. ill respect your wishes, though. to the low-t thread! :cheese:
I think what my friend Mitch is trying to say is that true love is blind.

Online Trim

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

Let me know where to find them. TIA.

Until you reminded me about the top 10 call, this was what I was coming up with as the last time I talked to you on the phone.  Like I knew it wasn't correct, but it's all I could remember.  #booze

Offline Mr Bread

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My prescience is fully engorged.  It throbs with righteous accuracy.  I am sated.

Offline Asteriskhead

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

Let me know where to find them. TIA.

Mostly don't care to raise a child. I realize fostering and adoption are both tough processes. Would still rather attempt to go that route if I change my mind.

Offline steve dave

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

there is definitely an incision. what do you think the chompers do? they incision.

Online Trim

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I have no desire to father littleMH's. I've been thinking about getting this done.

Graduation present to yourself

Sounds like I've got a semester and a half to avoid WackSquawking myself.
Given your age and marital status it will be a tough sell to the Dr. The only reason I was able to get mine done so early in life without having any kids already was that my family Dr did it and was also Mrs. Gooch's Dr so he was well aware of her views on having kids.

Crohn's is linked to heredity/ genetics. eff THAT. If I ever want to raise a kid, there are plenty of children without homes out there.

Let me know where to find them. TIA.

Mostly don't care to raise a child. I realize fostering and adoption are both tough processes. Would still rather attempt to go that route if I change my mind.

In due time, LSOC and I will have a story for you guys about some real fuckwads who are whipping ass on the fostering and adoption process.  Kind of disheartening.

Offline slobber

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

there is definitely an incision. what do you think the chompers do? they incision.
Okay, I didn't realize which chompers thing you had. We had that chompers as well. We also had a specialized chompers that we used on new born calves. It cut the cord holding the testicle without breaking the skin. You actually tested this chompers with a piece of string that a sheet of paper folded around it. You could cut the string in two without ripping the paper.

Offline Gooch

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

there is definitely an incision. what do you think the chompers do? they incision.
Okay, I didn't realize which chompers thing you had. We had that chompers as well. We also had a specialized chompers that we used on new born calves. It cut the cord holding the testicle without breaking the skin. You actually tested this chompers with a piece of string that a sheet of paper folded around it. You could cut the string in two without ripping the paper.
:dubious: cause of science ya know.
"Will is a good shooter"

Offline Bloodfart

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Use a rubber band, few days later boom new keychain thingy.

Offline Stevesie60

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Use a rubber band, few days later boom new keychain thingy.

Or decoration for your desk.

Offline slobber

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

there is definitely an incision. what do you think the chompers do? they incision.
Okay, I didn't realize which chompers thing you had. We had that chompers as well. We also had a specialized chompers that we used on new born calves. It cut the cord holding the testicle without breaking the skin. You actually tested this chompers with a piece of string that a sheet of paper folded around it. You could cut the string in two without ripping the paper.
:dubious: cause of science ya know.
Well yeah it's science. I would bet it is still not what people think of when they think about castration.
The tool is called a burdizzo. I had to look it up.

Offline Gooch

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if you are small enough to fit in the baby cow squeezer it can flip you over onto your side while squeezing you to give me a better angle with the chompers. this is preferred but not required.
And there is no incision. Tell them there is no incision. It's part of the FAB of going this route.

there is definitely an incision. what do you think the chompers do? they incision.
Okay, I didn't realize which chompers thing you had. We had that chompers as well. We also had a specialized chompers that we used on new born calves. It cut the cord holding the testicle without breaking the skin. You actually tested this chompers with a piece of string that a sheet of paper folded around it. You could cut the string in two without ripping the paper.
:dubious: cause of science ya know.
Well yeah it's science. I would bet it is still not what people think of when they think about castration.
The tool is called a burdizzo. I had to look it up.
I'm not googling that at work.
"Will is a good shooter"

Offline puniraptor

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Quote from: wiwkiwkwiwkwkwikwikiwikwi
The Burdizzo is a castration device which employs a large clamp designed to break the blood vessels leading into the testicles. Once the blood supply to the testicles is lost, testicular necrosis occurs, and the testicles shrink, soften, and eventually deteriorate completely. When the device is used the operator crushes the spermatic cords one at a time, leaving a space in between in order to maintain an interruption of blood-flow to the scrotum.

 :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek:

Offline puniraptor

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Quote from: wiwkiwkwiwkwkwikwikiwikwi
The Burdizzo is a castration device which employs a large clamp designed to break the blood vessels leading into the testicles. Once the blood supply to the testicles is lost, testicular necrosis occurs, and the testicles shrink, soften, and eventually deteriorate completely. When the device is used the operator crushes the spermatic cords one at a time, leaving a space in between in order to maintain an interruption of blood-flow to the scrotum.

 :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek: :sdeek:

also  :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf: :barf:

Online libliblibliblibliblib

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so glad i wasn't a farm kid.  did you barf a million times too sd?
Hyperbolic partisan duplicitous hypocrite

I think.you.are deep down.a.trans cowboy gravy eater.