Author Topic: it's an ill wind that blows no humor  (Read 10036 times)

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Offline Rage Against the McKee

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #25 on: April 23, 2013, 08:28:21 AM »
That would be funny if i thought ks really have a crap about sports.

He does. He's just a nerdy dumbass who has no idea that the basketball ship was doomed to sink when oscar was hired. He knows we just hit an iceberg, but he probably thinks the ship has deflector shields or something.

Offline puniraptor

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #26 on: April 23, 2013, 08:28:55 AM »
lol edn

Offline wabash909

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #27 on: April 23, 2013, 08:29:29 AM »
Quote
D. Scott Fritchen

Cracked a Red Bull. Back on the football grind.

Just incredible.


Texas Christian University coach Gary Patterson has been hired as Kansas State's 34th football coach, multiple sources have confirmed to GoPowercat.com.  Patterson replaces Ron Prince, who was fired Wednesday. - Tim Fitzgerald   Nov, 7, 2008

Offline Emo EMAW

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #28 on: April 23, 2013, 08:31:31 AM »
I mean, I don't even...

Offline MakeItRain

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #29 on: April 23, 2013, 08:41:00 AM »
edn gonna edn

Offline ednksu

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #30 on: April 23, 2013, 08:42:57 AM »
saying it was nice work?  wasn't aware complements were off limits now.
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Offline 8manpick

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #31 on: April 23, 2013, 10:00:07 AM »
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
:adios:

Offline j rake

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #32 on: April 23, 2013, 11:24:30 AM »
rebecca martinson would be a better motivator than oscar.


Offline bones129

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Re: Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #33 on: April 23, 2013, 11:50:12 AM »
rebecca martinson would be a better motivator than oscar.

A distinct possibility.

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Offline steve dave

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #34 on: April 23, 2013, 11:51:38 AM »
rebecca martinson would be a better motivator than oscar.

she's a better motivator than anyone I know. if I was planning an event for my company to get everyone off their ass I would hire her as the guest speaker.

Offline kitten_mittons

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #35 on: April 23, 2013, 11:54:25 AM »
I WOULD say she is probably a great recruiter, except, it seems like she can only recruit the socially awkward/Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!).  So she would just get us a bunch of Will Spradlings and cuss them out the whole game. Actually sounds like Frank in that respect.

Offline MadCat

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #36 on: April 23, 2013, 12:05:35 PM »
Not saying that it originated here, but I'm glad that phrase is alive and well.
http://goEMAW.com/forum/index.php?topic=21671.msg558983#msg558983

Offline Bqqkie Pimp

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #37 on: April 23, 2013, 12:42:33 PM »
i liked kirk schulz's letter better...

oscar Weber & coaching staff,

If you just opened this like I told you to, tie yourself down to whatever chair you're sitting in, because this email is going to be a rough rough ridin' ride.

For those of you that have your heads stuck under rocks, which apparently is the majority of this coaching staff, we have been rough ridin' UP in terms of recruiting good players and keeping those that were left behind. I've been getting texts on texts from alumni who are LITERALLY so rough ridin' PISSED and so rough ridin' BESIDE THEMSELVES. If you're reading this right now and saying to yourself "But gee Kirk, I've been having so much fun sharing conference championships and getting knocked out of the NCAA Tournament's first round!", then punch yourself in the face right now so that I don't have to rough ridin' find you on campus to do it myself.

I do not give a flying eff, and our fan base does not give a flying eff, about how much you rough ridin' love to run off your players. You have six rough ridin' shitty players, including Will Spradling, that you could run off, and instead you run off Angel, who is NOT, I rough ridin' repeat NOT ONE OF THEM that should be ran off. This season is about keeping the program relevant, and that's not rough ridin' possible if you're going to run off our best rough ridin' player. Newsflash you stupid cocks: FANS DON'T LIKE SUCKY TEAMS. Oh wait, DOUBLE rough ridin' NEWSFLASH: NOBODY IS GOING TO COME TO OUR GAMES IF WE DON'T HAVE GOOD PLAYERS AND IF WE rough ridin' SUCK, which by the way in case you're an idiot and need it spelled out for you, WE ARE GOING TO rough ridin' SUCK!

This also applies to you little shits that have talked openly about recruiting two and three stars. Are you coaches Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)? That's not a rhetorical question, I LITERALLY want you to email me back telling me if you're mentally slow so I can make sure you don't coach anymore. If Angel said, "Yeah I'm gonna transfer to South Carolina", would you be happy? WOULD YOU? No you wouldn't, so WHY THE eff WOULD YOU LET HIM GO?? AND A MONTH AFTER THE SEASON?!! First of all, you SHOULDN'T be letting this happen, I don't give a eff if he promised you he'd stay, if his brother promised you he'd stay, or if his entire family promised you he'd stay. YOU DON'T LET HIM GO. YOU. DON'T. LET. HIM. GO. And you ESPECIALLY do rough ridin' NOT run off other players along with him.

"But Kirk!", you say in a whiny little bitch voice to your computer screen as you read this email, "I've been coaching this team to split fake ass regular season championships, doesn't that count for something?" NO YOU STUPID rough ridin' ASS HATS, IT rough ridin' DOESN'T. DO YOU WANNA KNOW rough ridin' WHY?!! IT DOESN'T COUNT BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN rough ridin' UP IN THE NCAA TOURNAMENT. I've not only gotten texts about coaches being rough ridin' WEIRD to recruits (for example, being stupid shits and saying stuff like "durr what's basketball?" is not rough ridin' funny), but I've gotten texts about coaches actually cheering for our recruits to play terrible. To. Play. Terrible. ARE YOU rough ridin' STUPID?!! I don't give a crap about the reason, YOU ROOT FOR OUR GODDAMN RECRUITS TO SUCCEED AND NOT TO FAIL. HAVE YOU NEVER RECRUITED BEFORE? ARE YOU rough ridin' BLIND? Or are you just so rough ridin' dense about what it means to bring in talent that you think being a negative douche is going to help bring us better players? Well it's time someone told you, NO ONE rough ridin' LIKES THAT, ESPECIALLY OUR rough ridin' RECRUITS. I will rough ridin' $!#* punt the next person I hear about doing something like that, and I don't give a eff if you tweet me, I WILL rough ridin' ASSAULT YOU.

"Ohhh, I'm now crying because your email has made me oh so so sad". Well good. If this email applies to you in any way, meaning if you are a little asswipe that stands in the corners at night or if you're a weird crap that does weird crap during the day, this following message is for you:

DO NOT COACH HERE ANYMORE.

I'm not rough ridin' kidding. Don't coach. Seriously, if you have done ANYTHING I've mentioned in this email and have some rare disease where you're unable to NOT do these things, then you are HORRIBLE, I repeat, HORRIBLE PR FOR THIS PROGRAM AND UNIVERSITY. I would rather have five coaches that are fun, talk to recruits, and not rough ridin' awkward than 10 that are rough ridin' awful at their jobs. If you are one of the people that have told me "Oh nooo boo hoo I can't talk to recruits I'm too sober", then I pity you because I don't know how you got this far in life, and with that in mind don't rough ridin' coach anymore unless you're going to stop being a goddamn black hole for our program. Seriously. I swear to rough ridin' God if I see anyone being a goddamn boner at the next player visit, I will fire you even if you're sober. I'm not even kidding. Try me.

And for those of you who are offended at this email, I would apologize but I really don't give a eff. Go eff yourself.

Kirk (Go Cats!)

nice adaptation
http://deadspin.com/we-rough ridin'-suck-so-far-a-sorority-girl-lashes-out-at-476159462


Soooo... What you're saying is that jrake's fake email is not original and that he somehow plagarized the work of that crazed sorostitute Becca Martinson?

Is nothing sacred anymore?

bears are fast...

Offline Lucas Scoopsalot

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #38 on: April 23, 2013, 02:21:14 PM »
Guys, the hate on twitter towards goEMAW is real. Why are we so hated for speaking the truth?
Luke's stock is rising as Winters continues to validate his greatness. Add Luke and Winters to my list! Also, EMAWBLAST! and Tobias!

Offline sonofdaxjones

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #39 on: April 23, 2013, 02:23:39 PM »
i liked kirk schulz's letter better...

oscar Weber & coaching staff,

If you just opened this like I told you to, tie yourself down to whatever chair you're sitting in, because this email is going to be a rough rough ridin' ride.

For those of you that have your heads stuck under rocks, which apparently is the majority of this coaching staff, we have been rough ridin' UP in terms of recruiting good players and keeping those that were left behind. I've been getting texts on texts from alumni who are LITERALLY so rough ridin' PISSED and so rough ridin' BESIDE THEMSELVES. If you're reading this right now and saying to yourself "But gee Kirk, I've been having so much fun sharing conference championships and getting knocked out of the NCAA Tournament's first round!", then punch yourself in the face right now so that I don't have to rough ridin' find you on campus to do it myself.

I do not give a flying eff, and our fan base does not give a flying eff, about how much you rough ridin' love to run off your players. You have six rough ridin' shitty players, including Will Spradling, that you could run off, and instead you run off Angel, who is NOT, I rough ridin' repeat NOT ONE OF THEM that should be ran off. This season is about keeping the program relevant, and that's not rough ridin' possible if you're going to run off our best rough ridin' player. Newsflash you stupid cocks: FANS DON'T LIKE SUCKY TEAMS. Oh wait, DOUBLE rough ridin' NEWSFLASH: NOBODY IS GOING TO COME TO OUR GAMES IF WE DON'T HAVE GOOD PLAYERS AND IF WE rough ridin' SUCK, which by the way in case you're an idiot and need it spelled out for you, WE ARE GOING TO rough ridin' SUCK!

This also applies to you little shits that have talked openly about recruiting two and three stars. Are you coaches Fake Sugar Dick (WARNING, NOT THE REAL SUGAR DICK!)? That's not a rhetorical question, I LITERALLY want you to email me back telling me if you're mentally slow so I can make sure you don't coach anymore. If Angel said, "Yeah I'm gonna transfer to South Carolina", would you be happy? WOULD YOU? No you wouldn't, so WHY THE eff WOULD YOU LET HIM GO?? AND A MONTH AFTER THE SEASON?!! First of all, you SHOULDN'T be letting this happen, I don't give a eff if he promised you he'd stay, if his brother promised you he'd stay, or if his entire family promised you he'd stay. YOU DON'T LET HIM GO. YOU. DON'T. LET. HIM. GO. And you ESPECIALLY do rough ridin' NOT run off other players along with him.

"But Kirk!", you say in a whiny little bitch voice to your computer screen as you read this email, "I've been coaching this team to split fake ass regular season championships, doesn't that count for something?" NO YOU STUPID rough ridin' ASS HATS, IT rough ridin' DOESN'T. DO YOU WANNA KNOW rough ridin' WHY?!! IT DOESN'T COUNT BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN rough ridin' UP IN THE NCAA TOURNAMENT. I've not only gotten texts about coaches being rough ridin' WEIRD to recruits (for example, being stupid shits and saying stuff like "durr what's basketball?" is not rough ridin' funny), but I've gotten texts about coaches actually cheering for our recruits to play terrible. To. Play. Terrible. ARE YOU rough ridin' STUPID?!! I don't give a crap about the reason, YOU ROOT FOR OUR GODDAMN RECRUITS TO SUCCEED AND NOT TO FAIL. HAVE YOU NEVER RECRUITED BEFORE? ARE YOU rough ridin' BLIND? Or are you just so rough ridin' dense about what it means to bring in talent that you think being a negative douche is going to help bring us better players? Well it's time someone told you, NO ONE rough ridin' LIKES THAT, ESPECIALLY OUR rough ridin' RECRUITS. I will rough ridin' $!#* punt the next person I hear about doing something like that, and I don't give a eff if you tweet me, I WILL rough ridin' ASSAULT YOU.

"Ohhh, I'm now crying because your email has made me oh so so sad". Well good. If this email applies to you in any way, meaning if you are a little asswipe that stands in the corners at night or if you're a weird crap that does weird crap during the day, this following message is for you:

DO NOT COACH HERE ANYMORE.

I'm not rough ridin' kidding. Don't coach. Seriously, if you have done ANYTHING I've mentioned in this email and have some rare disease where you're unable to NOT do these things, then you are HORRIBLE, I repeat, HORRIBLE PR FOR THIS PROGRAM AND UNIVERSITY. I would rather have five coaches that are fun, talk to recruits, and not rough ridin' awkward than 10 that are rough ridin' awful at their jobs. If you are one of the people that have told me "Oh nooo boo hoo I can't talk to recruits I'm too sober", then I pity you because I don't know how you got this far in life, and with that in mind don't rough ridin' coach anymore unless you're going to stop being a goddamn black hole for our program. Seriously. I swear to rough ridin' God if I see anyone being a goddamn boner at the next player visit, I will fire you even if you're sober. I'm not even kidding. Try me.

And for those of you who are offended at this email, I would apologize but I really don't give a eff. Go eff yourself.

Kirk (Go Cats!)


The worst ever.

Offline Lucas Scoopsalot

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #40 on: April 23, 2013, 02:46:21 PM »
I also agree with some of the other fans on twitter that some of us are taking it to far.
Luke's stock is rising as Winters continues to validate his greatness. Add Luke and Winters to my list! Also, EMAWBLAST! and Tobias!

Offline Stevesie60

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #41 on: April 23, 2013, 06:21:28 PM »
Good grief, ednksu.

Offline Stevesie60

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #42 on: April 23, 2013, 06:22:23 PM »
DRIVE-BY SHOTS FIRED!!!

Offline j rake

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #43 on: April 23, 2013, 08:25:18 PM »
Quote from: ednksu link=topic=27469.msg804427#msg804427 date=136672363[/quote
nice adaptation
http://deadspin.com/we-rough ridin'-suck-so-far-a-sorority-girl-lashes-out-at-476159462


Soooo... What you're saying is that jrake's fake email is not original and that he somehow plagarized the work of that crazed sorostitute Becca Martinson?

Is nothing sacred anymore?

it was pretty obvious, no?

the ebert one, less so, which is why he was credited. #RIPbtw


Offline ednksu

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #44 on: April 25, 2013, 10:27:59 AM »
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
Number of fucks I give....zero.  See I don't spend my life here.  Some people might have missed it on whatever other board it was posted on. I thought it was pretty funny adaptation, not plagiarization. 

Here is another thing I found funny about this letter.  BUT ZOMG IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN POSTED.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/4ad20b4edf/michael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter?playlist=featured_videos
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Offline michigancat

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #45 on: April 25, 2013, 11:58:42 AM »
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
Number of fucks I give....zero.  See I don't spend my life here.  Some people might have missed it on whatever other board it was posted on. I thought it was pretty funny adaptation, not plagiarization. 

Here is another thing I found funny about this letter.  BUT ZOMG IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN POSTED.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/4ad20b4edf/michael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter?playlist=featured_videos

well the thing about this letter is that it wasn't just posted here it was posted everywhere on the planet and everyone in the world knew about it and another thing is you probably give more than zero fucks, more like 3 or 4, otherwise you wouldn't get pissed when people give you crap for being a dumbass.

Offline puniraptor

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #46 on: April 25, 2013, 12:01:17 PM »
I just said lol because you were being a joke explainer

Offline EllRobersonisInnocent

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #47 on: April 25, 2013, 01:15:35 PM »
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
Number of fucks I give....zero.  See I don't spend my life here.  Some people might have missed it on whatever other board it was posted on. I thought it was pretty funny adaptation, not plagiarization. 

Here is another thing I found funny about this letter.  BUT ZOMG IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN POSTED.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/4ad20b4edf/michael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter?playlist=featured_videos

lukenksu

Offline 420seriouscat69

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #48 on: April 25, 2013, 01:25:03 PM »
I also agree with some of the other fans on twitter that some of us are taking it to far.
There's a lot of naive dumb fucks out there, luke. They hate that we warned them last year and now we're right. Every fanbase needs a scapegoat.

Offline ednksu

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Re: it's an ill wind that blows no humor
« Reply #49 on: April 26, 2013, 03:45:25 AM »
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
Number of fucks I give....zero.  See I don't spend my life here.  Some people might have missed it on whatever other board it was posted on. I thought it was pretty funny adaptation, not plagiarization. 

Here is another thing I found funny about this letter.  BUT ZOMG IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN POSTED.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/4ad20b4edf/michael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter?playlist=featured_videos

lukenksu
:facepalm:
Linking the original that has already been talked about a bunch on this site I think, edn.
Number of fucks I give....zero.  See I don't spend my life here.  Some people might have missed it on whatever other board it was posted on. I thought it was pretty funny adaptation, not plagiarization. 

Here is another thing I found funny about this letter.  BUT ZOMG IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN POSTED.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/4ad20b4edf/michael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter?playlist=featured_videos

well the thing about this letter is that it wasn't just posted here it was posted everywhere on the planet and everyone in the world knew about it and another thing is you probably give more than zero fucks, more like 3 or 4, otherwise you wouldn't get pissed when people give you crap for being a dumbass.
lol
keep getting worked up crusty. 
its good to know that you care this much about me.
Quote from: OregonHawk
KU is right on par with Notre Dame ... when it comes to adding additional conference revenue

Quote from: Kim Carnes
Beer pro tip: never drink anything other than BL, coors, pbr, maybe a few others that I'm forgetting