Author Topic: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves  (Read 2533 times)

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Offline pissclams

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speed, who loves it? me.  you.  we all do.  go cats. fastest animal in the world?  a cat. that's a fact.

i've just completed my annual analysis of speed across the big 12 teams.  included within my work is analysis of our ooc opponents speed.

what the work i've done proves without a doubt is that we have the quickest team in the big 12 at several key positions.  many within my inner circle have repeatedly said, clams- we have the most burners of anyone in the big 12 and our burner roster competes top 10 nationally.
i'm not a homer.  i refuse to award burner classification if there's even a sliver of doubt.

this year i'm going to use new classifications when describing burners, both on our team and on the teams of our opponents.
regular (87 octane), mid-grade (88-90 octane), and premium (91-94 high octane).

for example, alex delton is high octane, probably higher than 94 octane if i were to take him to my testing lab and verify the exact percentage.

teams that are lower than 87 octane in the big 12 are oklahoma, iowa state, baylor.  i'm going to refer to them as regular octane though because i don't want to disrespect them, but just know that their octane levels are much lower than 87%.

mississippi state has very low octane, sub 83% levels.  very slow.  no gas.  all ethanol.  bad for your engine.

if you want to know a particular player or team's octane assignment just ask and i'll pull it out of the database for  you.
go cats.


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Offline I_have_purplewood

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2018, 10:55:11 AM »
I look forward to these every year and this one didn't disappoint! :fistpump:
Fifteen minutes later, when the Kansas locker room opened its doors to the media, the Jayhawks were still crying. Literally, bawling. All of them. I've never seen anything like it, and I've seen devastated college locker rooms -- after losses in the Final Four, the national championship game -- ever

Offline 420seriouscat69

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2018, 10:55:54 AM »
 :love:

Offline pissclams

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2018, 10:56:27 AM »
the rankings aren't even out yet but you will not be disappointed when i release them.  still waiting on a few non-disclosure agreements to be signed


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Offline DQ12

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2018, 11:03:28 AM »
How would you rate Mississippi State's QB Fitzgerald?  Thanks for building this out, btw.  Best kept secret in college football data.


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Offline CHONGS

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2018, 11:08:52 AM »
The one place where we have a big advantage over Miss St is our team speed.  The slow lumbering SEC type players just haven't experienced B12 speed.

Offline kslim

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2018, 11:25:41 AM »
hello pissclams, first time long time. how would you rate the university of texas' octane levels, and has coach tom herman been able to speed up the octane since taking over is he more of a sludge guy?

ill listen off the air

Offline DaBigTrain

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2018, 12:19:24 PM »
I’ve been waiting WEEKS for this to come out.  Have a couple of SEC fans in the office and they’ve been feeding me onion articles(they aren’t very smart) about SEC speed and I just have to belly laugh.  Love showing them real data every summer when these come out.  :thumbs:
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Offline ChiComCat

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2018, 12:33:00 PM »
I'm a big one game at a time guy.  Let's not get ahead of ourselves as we need to focus on each game.  I'd like to know the octane level we can expect in the opener against this directional Dakota school.

Offline Playboy X

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2018, 02:38:47 PM »
you guys ain't crap never been crap and ain't gonna be crap so just go back to farmville and play some nintendo with your little pichashu friends.  my  boys from utsa gonna whip that azz 2
Women and weed, what else matters?

Offline steve dave

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2018, 04:12:37 PM »
pissclams, can you please provide the data on isaiah zuber? thank you.

Offline pissclams

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2018, 04:29:37 PM »
sure no problem.  the data i have on zubes is that he's rated ultra high octane (95%).  throttle for throttle one of the most octaned wide receivers in the big twelve.  he will be wide open 95% percent of the time on his route running because his fuel levels are unparalleled.  the guys in oklahoma can't shazbot! enough octane for this man but look for many earthquakes as they continue to try to satiate his appetite for more octane. 


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Offline hemmy

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2018, 04:31:18 PM »
can I get an all-speed team?

Offline pissclams

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #13 on: August 02, 2018, 04:32:30 PM »
can I get an all-speed team?

do you even know who is on our roster, hemmy?  what type of fuel are you on :lol: 


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Offline PurpleOil

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #14 on: August 02, 2018, 04:37:25 PM »
I love this, but octane is not a percentage. Also, the octane rating for ethanol is extremely high, 113.


Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to share this super engi-nerd oil knowledge, that you certainly didn't ask for, with you guys.




Where do you believe TCU will rank on the scale?

Offline CHONGS

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #15 on: August 02, 2018, 05:53:06 PM »
I would like the hot doss on A Barnes.  Thnkx

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #16 on: August 02, 2018, 06:29:03 PM »
Curveball, what have discovered about the LHC Bill Snyder family octane level?
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Offline wetwillie

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #17 on: August 02, 2018, 06:40:33 PM »
I’m so rough ridin' amped for this ranking of our speed merchants
When the bullets are flying, that's when I'm at my best

Offline meow meow

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #18 on: August 02, 2018, 07:12:15 PM »

Offline pissclams

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #19 on: August 02, 2018, 07:59:36 PM »
I would like the hot doss on A Barnes.  Thnkx

barnes is a case study in octane overload.  he's quick but not to quick.  he's strong but not too strong. he is also incredibly charming and handsome.  his maximum octane levels peak at 96 but he usually runs something else all together in his tank.  the reasoning is because his engine is different.  he goes 90% nitromethane; 10% methanol. the fuel blend gives him more power than any other big 12 back and puts him in the top 4 nationally.  no other back in the b12 can touch 90% nitromethane.  he is the full package.

jukes:  A+, 97% octane
blocking:  A-, 92% octane
running straight:  A+, 97% octane
sideways running:  A, 93% octane

if you want a friend, pick up the phone and give alex a call just to chat.  if you want to murder OU by running for 345 yards against them, replace alex's octane with nitromethane.  i would guarantee those numbers against ou but i have a feeling that our friends who own this website would not like me to be giving away spoilers before the gameday threads lol.  SPOILER ALERT. 

cats


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Offline Pete

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #20 on: August 03, 2018, 04:27:45 AM »
This is the type of info that I’d be willing to steal my mom’s gas card to pay for.

Offline kslim

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie staring keanu reeves
« Reply #21 on: August 03, 2018, 07:15:56 AM »
hello pissclams, first time long time. how would you rate the university of texas' octane levels, and has coach tom herman been able to speed up the octane since taking over is he more of a sludge guy?

ill listen off the air
:impatient:

Offline DaBigTrain

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #22 on: August 03, 2018, 07:30:12 AM »
This is the type of info that I’d be willing to steal my mom’s gas card to pay for.

Knowing how mean your mom can be this says it all.
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Offline 420seriouscat69

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #23 on: August 03, 2018, 08:24:29 AM »
I'm sorry, guys, but Barnes is slow af. Give me some real burners.

Offline Kat Kid

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Re: speed, it's more than just a great movie starring keanu reeves
« Reply #24 on: August 03, 2018, 08:33:22 AM »
I know "burners" are usually the guys scoring TDs, but would really like to get some scoops on the Defensive burners. I think our squad will really "rally to the ball" and gang tackle the dawgs.

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