ANNOUNCING FIRST ANNUAL goEMAW.com SIGNING DAY FESTIVAL OF GREATNESS!!!!!

[Pete]

Fellow EMAW,

It is with great pleasure that I welcome you all to the FIRST ANNUAL go.EMAW.com SIGNING DAY FESTIVAL OF GREATNESS.

Or, mommies'D'FOG as it's called for short (shout out to Kellis for that one!  Love ya, bro).

It wasn’t such a long time ago that the mere mention of the phrase “letter of intent” would have sent shivers of ecstasy down an EMAW’ers spine.   Well, we here at goEMAW.com aren’t going to let those heady days go without a fight!
 
We aim to put the magic back into signing day….the wonder, the mystery, the bountiful cup that runneth over with 2 stars…..IT’S ALL BACK!  We are sponsoring two contests, and these are open to everyone, to commemorate this event:
 
1.   Essay contest: The theme is "What signing day means to me."  WINNER GETS A FREE goEMAW.com T-SHIRT! Reply to this thread with your submission.  The Essay must be less than 100 words.  Winning entries will be judged by our Moderators.  This contest opens immediately, and will close this week at Midnight, Wednesday, Feb. 3rd.  I have to be honest, I don't have very high expectations for this event, partly because the posters on this board are barely literate and partly because it's admittedly a stupid idea.....so, fracking surprise me, then.    Reply to this thread with your essays....don't fracking make me PM your asses, this is a festival.  

EDIT:  1.  Poetry Contest:  Obviously this board is a HUGE poetry board....pretty rough ridin' insensitive of me not to foresee this.  That's on me.  Same rules and awards apply as listed for the above, admittedly foolish and outdated, Essay Contest.
 
2.   Photoshop contest:  Best Photoshop, MSpaint, etc. job of a photo of one of our signees....in whatever manner you choose.  WINNER GETS A FREE goEMAW.com T-SHIRT!  We’ll open a separate thread for this effort.  Winning entries will be judged by our Moderators.   This contest opens immediately, and will close this week at Midnight, Wednesday, Feb. 3rd.  ENTER AS OFTEN AS YOU LIKE!  I actually do have really high hopes for this effort.  I put early odds on 'Clams MS Paint abilities and we'd be foolish to rule out Dirty Sanchez...basically this mother fracker is wide open.

[Pete]

Ok, Ok, no more PM's on this...

We WILL accept entries in the form of Haiku and/or dirty limerick. 

[Dugout DickStone]

Ok, Ok, no more PM's on this...

We WILL accept entries in the form of Haiku and/or dirty limerick. 

There once was a coach named old ballz
who didn't know how to make cell phone callz
come signing day, he said with dismay
"i suppose i should recruit at the mallz"

best i could do right now...

[Cire]

'Member Nick Patton?
Thought he was next Roberson
Would Take 'Nother Webb

[Mikeyis4dcats]

Mark Dunn had 5 stars
That means stars ain't crap
2 stars coach em up!

[Pete]

Great work so far....

...However, this is not exclusively for poems, homos...still, good work though.

[steve dave]

Football What The eff
Who Even Pays Attention
Nebraska Tuesday

5-7-5 right?

[Mikeyis4dcats]

Great work so far....

...However, this is not exclusively for poems, homos...still, good work though.

haiku not poem
jerkface, now I have to cry   
vegemite sandwich

[wes mantooth]

What signing day means to me, by Wesley J. Mantooth

 

[Cire]

Bullman benched a bus
Man he sucked ass at football
can't we be better.

[Mikeyis4dcats]

Bullman benched a bus
Man he sucked ass at football
Why can't we be better.

DQ.

last line is 6 syllables.

[Pete]

Football What The shazbot!
Who Even Pays Attention
Nebraska Tuesday

5-7-5 right?

I can't have nice things, can I?

[steve dave]

Football What The shazbot!
Who Even Pays Attention
Nebraska Tuesday

5-7-5 right?

I can't have nice things, can I?

I participated! 

[Cire]

If a mod wins I will sue the crap out of this site.

[cyclist]

If a mod wins I will sue the crap out of this site.

[steve dave]

If a mod wins I will sue the crap out of this site.

pfffttt    perfect usage

[cyclist]

If a mod wins I will sue the crap out of this site.

pfffttt    perfect usage

All in good fun, SD !

 

[The42Yardstick]

Dear Sir or Madam,

I understand that those of you working in the Azerbaijian Department of Defense have little time to read a letter from a poor beet farmer such as myself. I have been receiving telegrams from an American named LHC Bill Snyder. He intends to bring me to the United States to play American football, and despite my repeated attempts at denial he continues to contact me. I am merely 5'2" and 140 pounds but this man continues to insist that I am the prototype of an outstanding football player. His continued mention of the words "Signing Day" make me rue the fate of any poor sods that agree to partake in such a horrific ritual. Please deny his continued attempts to obtain a visa to our country, as I do not want to hear from him again!

-Heydar Oglu

[Pete]

Dear Sir or Madam,

I understand that those of you working in the Azerbaijian Department of Defense have little time to read a letter from a poor beet farmer such as myself. I have been receiving telegrams from an American named LHC Bill Snyder. He intends to bring me to the United States to play American football, and despite my repeated attempts at denial he continues to contact me. I am merely 5'2" and 140 pounds but this man continues to insist that I am the prototype of an outstanding football player. His continued mention of the words "Signing Day" make me rue the fate of any poor sods that agree to partake in such a horrific ritual. Please deny his continued attempts to obtain a visa to our country, as I do not want to hear from him again!

-Heydar Oglu

Dear Heydar,

Get ready to get your crap coached up.

Very Truly Yours,

OB

[WolfKnifeLaserTorch]

eff Redshirt...
eff Greyshirt...
I want goEMAW shirt...

[DQ12]

There once was an athlete named Tate
Who played football, but wasn't so great
His Grampy was coach
And beyond all reproach
This is worse than when my girlfriend was late

[slimz]

Snyder and Leno
Both beloved by the senile
And thus both return

[catzacker]

Signing day means I get to see threads talking about how KSU got screwed on recruiting rankings, right underneath a thread about how stars don't matter. 

Signing day means I get to look up and down a commitment list that once again, for he 10th class in a row under Snyder, won't include an elite..hell an average...Big 12 quarterback.
 
Signing day means that I get to remember what it felt like to have an assistant that smelled and looked as good as Venzy and reminds me of the awful smelling, terrible looking assistants we currently have scouring Centralia for recruits.

Sigining day should be a day you go get flowers and lay them next to the grave marked "DOD". 
 
I can only imagine that asking a KSU fan what signing day means must be like asking the British what the 4th of July means to them or a Native American what Thanksgiving means to them.  It's a day where, if you had forgotten, should be a painful reminder of what was and what will never be again.

[steve dave]

Rest easy fellas, Tate has put pen to paper 

[WildcatNkilt]

Rest easy fellas, Tate has put pen to paper 

What a relief.  Time for some coach-em-up.