1. I before E except after C?
Bullsh*t
2. Also, is it past/passed? As in "It's past/passed my bed time" I'm guessing the latter, but IDK for sure.
3. How do you use a semicolon or a colon? WTF is with those things?
4. Commas 
5. Periods within quotes like above: "It's passed my bed time." or "It's passed my bed time".
Does the period go inside the quotes or outside? 
1. Generally that's the case, but not always.
2. "Past" is an adjective (All your past posts suck), a noun (Don't live in the past you psycho), adjective (Half past twelve) and an adverb (All my peers blew past me in the foot race). "Passed" is a verb in the past-tense (
this winter has blown passed me. I passed the test).
3. A semicolon has several uses. First, it is used after colons that indicate a list and have multiple punctuations (I hate three men in the KSU athletic department: Old Ballz, the football coach; Younger balls, Old Ballz's reincarnation; and Chris Cosh, a shitty d coordinator). Second, between separate, but closely related independent clauses (Old Ballz was in Vanier; He was sleeping.) Finally, it is used between independent clauses and semi clauses linked by a transitional phrase (Old Ballz is destroying the football program; of course, he'll never be fired).
4. I don't know, look it up.
5. If the quote is within a sentence, put a comma within the quote ("I'd like to fire Cosh, but I'm busy doing other crap," Snyder said). If a sentence is ended by a quote, put the period within the quote (Last year I said "eff Snyder.").
